♠︎ fifty two

I can't believe this is it! the FINAL chapter of brat tamer!

i'm actually pretty emotional writing this, which sounds crazy for a silly little smut book lol - but to be honest, i struggle with finishing things, so to be able to close this story out is a huge achievement for me. 

don't worry, there will be an epilogue and also some bonus chapters to follow, so this isn't the last you'll hear of brat tamer! look out for the epilogue coming tomorrow.

thank you guys so much for supporting my story to the end. big purple hugs for all of you!

~ mama bagels 💜

CHAPTER FIFTY TWO

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♠︎ YOU

The moment you left, you knew it was a mistake.

It had been a spur of the moment decision; one minute you were signing off the article in your notebook, and the next you were calling to arrange the first private plane to get you off the island. At that point, it didn't feel real. 

Until they told you it could be there in three hours, and you were saying yes before you could think.

You didn't remember packing. Didn't remember your notebook, which you left behind by mistake; not that you would ever have printed that article about Jungkook anyway. You'd have to come up with something, but you'd worry about that once you got home. 

Home. It sounded an odd word to be describing any place that wasn't beside Jungkook. 

Daegu, you changed it to in your head. I'm going back to Daegu.

Your phone rang in your pocket and you ignored it. You didn't want to know who it was; Yoongi or Nia, most likely, telling you to turn your ass back around and face your fears. They were most likely right, and you didn't want to hear it.

The thought of it being Jungkook calling you was too much to bear.

You'd hoped he wouldn't have figured it out yet, until you were a safe distance away. Your heart ached at the idea of him walking into your bedroom and realising what you had done. Realising you were gone, without even saying goodbye.

You shifted in your seat, feeling a tear roll down your cheek, which you hastily wiped away as you stewed in guilt. Couldn't you have said goodbye to him, at least? Couldn't you have given him the courtesy of telling him you were going, instead of fleeing like a cowering child, too afraid of her own feelings to admit that she was destroying someone else in the process? 

After all - wasn't this supposed to be a man you loved?

"What am I doing," you muttered to yourself, heart racing as you sat up straight, glancing at your surroundings. "What the fuck am I doing here?"

It was as if a fog cleared in your mind - though what had triggered it, you weren't entirely sure. Suddenly, what had seemed difficult was incredibly simple. 

Why the hell were you sat here, in a swelteringly hot airport terminal in the middle of an island, about to sacrifice the only person you thought you might have ever really loved?

You had no fucking idea why. 

You remembered a line you'd written in the notebook - that Jungkook often got things wrong because he was trying so hard to get things right. Perhaps you had spent too much time around him, because you were doing exactly that. 

In trying to do the right thing - letting him go, to be with someone who could make him happy - you were going to break his heart. 

The image of Jungkook, standing alone in your empty room, unable to understand why you left him without reason or explanation, returned to you in full technicolour.

You'd barely given it a second to haunt you before you were up out of your seat, running towards the terminal doors.

Fuck this, you thought, racing across the blisteringly hot terminal plaza with bags in hand. Fuck letting him go.

Dragging your suitcases with you, you dumped them in the back of the golf buggy you had driven here, starting it up once more and swerving around to head back to the house. It was close by, but it felt like a lifetime, no matter how quickly you urged the buggy onwards.

Come on, you thought to yourself, hurtling along the tree-lined avenue towards the resort, thinking of how Jungkook would feel if he went into your room and discovered it was bare. Come on, come on-

Finally, you reached the house, abandoning your cases, racing through the front door and up the stairs. Your heart pounded, blood rushing in your ears with the realisation that nothing had felt right the last few days, until the moment you decided to turn around and find him.

But when you got to his room, it was empty. 

You moved to his window, glancing down onto the terrace below, but you couldn't see him; only a few of the boys and Yoora, sunning themselves, unaware of the inner turmoil raging above them.

Where the hell was he?

You tried your room next - for what reason, you weren't sure. Jungkook wasn't there - but something much worse was awaiting you.

On the bed, tossed aside as if in a hurry, was your notebook. It was open on the page you had written only a few hours ago.

Your stomach churned.

Shit, you thought, realising what it meant if Jungkook had read that article after discovering your room empty - but a voice at the door interrupted your panicking.

"Huh?"

You whipped around to find Yoongi, gazing at you in shock in the doorway.

"What the-" he began, still staring at you. "Where's Jungkook?"

"I'm trying to find him," you said urgently, moving towards Yoongi. "Have you seen him?"

"He just went looking for you," Yoongi insisted sardonically. "We thought you left!"

"I did leave, I just-" you began, unable to find the words to explain it in such a rush. Jungkook was all that mattered right now. "Look, can I explain later, where is he?"

"The airport. Go!" he urged you, pushing you out the door and down the corridor. "Honestly. I'm too old and gay for this."

"You say that about everything!" you called over your shoulder, racing down the stairs.

"It's true about everything!" he called after you - but it was too late for you to reply, because you had yanked the front door open, clambering back into the golf buggy and starting it once more.

Desperate, you drew out your phone, you called Jungkook.

No answer.

All the way back to the airport your hands trembled at the wheel, your worst fears confirmed. Jungkook knew you'd packed up, knew you'd considered leaving, that you'd written about it, even. He didn't know you had changed your mind.

What if he got there, saw you were missing, and thought you were already gone?

The thought of how heartbroken he would be was too much to bear. You couldn't believe you were about to make such an awful decision. 

After an age, the buggy chugged back into the airport, the tiny lone building standing stark against the lush mountains rising behind it. Only one thing had changed since you had been there a half hour ago.

A lone figure, walking out of the terminal. 

His shoulders were low, as if dejected, and your heart wrenched at the thought of it, unable to let him suffer for even another second. 

"Kookie!" you called to him.

The figure stopped in it's tracks.

You couldn't take it any longer. You hoisted yourself from the vehicle, rushing for him across the sun-beaten pavement. 

"What the..." he gazed at you, and then at the golf buggy behind you, startled by your sudden appearance from the totally unexpected direction. But before he could ask any questions you had reached for him, leaping into his arms.

It shocked Jungkook, but he reacted quickly, letting you loop your legs around his waist. He took one step backwards, steadying himself, but his arms were tight around you, certain and sure, and you felt the tears pricking your eyes the moment you felt his warmth against yours, his arms circling your waist.

"I'm so sorry," you breathed against him, burying your face in his neck. "Kookie, I'm so sorry-"

"I thought you left," he squeezed you tighter in his arms, placing a kiss against the side of your face. "Fuck, I was so worried-"

"I did," you told him, drawing back to gaze at him. "I changed my mind."

  For a while you stayed in his embrace, letting him hold you against his body, relishing in the familiar scent of him, the comfort it was providing you with almost making you cry. He was looking at you like he couldn't believe you were here.

The idea that he'd believed, even for a moment, that you had left, was soul-crushing.

"I was such an idiot," you told him, cupping his cheek in your hand and gazing into his sparkling eyes. "I was going to run away from you. What the fuck was I thinking? I can't believe I was going to do that."

"Neither can I," Jungkook admitted, but he wasn't upset. He was grinning. No - he was laughing. 

You recognised this laugh. It was the one he gave when he was relieved at something, or particularly happy. 

You loved this laugh.

You grinned right back at him, thinking again about how stupid and cowardly you had been to even consider giving him up. The thought made a sinking feeling settle in your stomach, and you clambered down, letting Jungkook set you on your feet.

Still, though, he didn't untangle his arms from around your waist.

"You read what I wrote," you guessed, and he nodded slowly, eyes alight with emotion. 

"I did," he confirmed, one hand stroking down your spine. "It was all wrong, by the way."

A smile broke across your face at this - of course Jungkook would be modest at a time like this, after having read your descriptions of him. "It was all true."

"You said you didn't deserve me," he pointed out, teeth catching his lip ring cutely. "That's not true."

You nodded, stroking a finger over his cheekbone. "I don't, Kookie. Look at the way I treated you these past few days. Not trusting you. Not believing that you trusted me. I wasn't exactly a perfect partner, was I?"

Jungkook gazed at you for a long moment before he answered.

"I don't want someone who's perfect," he said, his face serious now. "I want someone who knows me. Someone who fucks it up and forgives me for fucking it up too."

"So... you want someone who makes loads of mistakes?" you teased, but Jungkook wasn't joking. His face remained solemn, doe eyes locked on yours.

"Yes," he nodded, hand tangling into your hair, making your heart unfurl. "I want to make mistakes with you, baby."

It was the most beautiful thing anyone had ever said to you. You were beaming so widely now that you thought your jaw might fall off.

"Good," you laughed a little, letting him wipe away a stray tear as it rolled down your cheek. "Because I plan on making lots of them. I nearly made one today, actually. A huge one."

"Oh yeah?" he breathed, hand still stroking through your hair, pushing it behind one ear. 

"Mm," you nodded, edging closer to him, desperate to feel him against you once more.

"What changed your mind?" Jungkook murmured, his forehead brushing yours.

You closed your eyes, wanting to tell him everything that had gone through your mind in the last two days. How you'd realised he was the one you loved - maybe even the love of your life. How you'd written that article, intending to stay, and instead had drowned in your own sense of self-doubt.

How something had snapped in the airport, when you'd thought about leaving him without saying goodbye.

But you couldn't say all of this. You couldn't find the words.

"I didn't want to be an African claw frog any more," you admitted instead, remembering your conversation with Yoongi about the frogs who revealed their claws when they were feeling vulnerable.

Fuck that. You were embracing the vulnerable now, there was no turning back.

Jungkook just laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. "Do I even want to know what that is?"

"No," you shook your head too, grinning at him. "Just... it means no more hiding. I want everyone to know how much I want you."

Jungkook didn't seem to be able to find the words to reply to this, so he kissed you instead. 

His mouth was soft and warm, and it had been way too long since you'd really, properly kissed him, the thought of it making you feel emotional once more. Jungkook was grasping you so tightly, as if he were afraid you might evaporate if he let you go. But you weren't running anywhere this time. 

"I love you," he said, smiling into the kiss as he brushed your lips with his own. "So much."

"I know," you said, the sound of the words falling from his lips obliterated your heart into shards of light. "I love you too, Kookie."

He smirked suddenly. "So whipped for me."

You could have laughed, but you composed yourself quickly. "In your dreams, junior."

Jungkook placed a delicate kiss at the corner of your mouth. "There she is," he murmured against your jaw. "The brat is back."

You grinned, feeling the familiar stir of desire in your stomach as his kisses trailed down over your neck. It felt good to want him like this, just simple and pure wanting, after days of turmoil. 

"She never left," you corrected, sighing a little and tugging him closer to you.

Jungkook's kisses travelled towards your ear. "Good. Don't go anywhere again," he requested, breath fanning over your neck.

"Deal," you replied, grasping at his hair as his tongue darted out over your sweet spot. You felt weak in the knees, breathless and light-headed and the luckiest person alive.

Jungkook pulled back, meeting your eye once more. "I'm done with deals," he informed you. "No more deals. Just us."

"Okay," you nodded. "Just us."

His arms went back around your waist, drawing you into him once more. You held him close, unwilling to draw back for even a second, before you realised that you didn't need to be afraid to let him go. He wasn't going anywhere, and neither were you. 

The deal was at an end. 

When he dipped his head one final time, capturing your lips with his, you realised why it felt so good.

Because it felt like a beginning.

You wanted to kiss him here, in the beginning of whatever you and he were to become, forever. You wanted to stay tangled with him on the sun-beaten pavement, suspended in this one moment, wrapped in a forever of beginnings with Jungkook.

But even if that were physically possible, you were interrupted anyway.

"Um," a voice echoed from behind you, in the direction of the terminal. "What the fuck is going on here?"

It couldn't be.

You detached yourself from Jungkook, peeking over his shoulder in disbelief, and your jaw dropped. 

"Nia?!"

Your best friend was stood in the door of the airport terminal with crossed arms, gazing between you and Jungkook. All you could process was the plane behind her - and the fact that you'd been so lost in Jungkook just now, you hadn't even seen it come in to land.

Nia, on the other hand, looked ticked off.

"Are you telling me I blackmailed a pilot into bringing me here on the jet you ordered, only for you to put your big girl pants on and woman up before I even got here?" Nia huffed. 

"Sorry, you did what to a pilot? And how did you even know I booked a plane?" you challenged, but Nia was dismissing your question with a wave of her hand, as if to say - when do I not know what you're doing, girl.

"Never mind that. Did you seriously change your mind and go back to him? All by yourself?" she pressed, one raised eyebrow making your stomach jolt. Nia was terrifying when she wanted to be.

"Uh... yeah," you admitted a little sheepishly, curling into Jungkook's chest with pink dusting your cheeks. "I did."

Jungkook's arm slid around your shoulders, pulling you close. You didn't need to look at him to know he was blushing, shy but content.

Nia rolled her eyes, but she was smiling wide. It was a big, genuine smile.

"Well, fuck me sideways," she mused, pride glinting in her eyes. "The Coochie Whisperer triumphs at last."

"The what now?" Jungkook's brow furrowed, and you giggled.

"Don't worry about it, Juan," Nia dismissed it casually. "Let's go have fun, huh? I heard there was a birthday party tomorrow for which my attendance is requested. Nay, required."

You froze, glancing up at Jungkook. He looked pained. "Kookie," you said sternly.

He averted his eyes, pouting his lips as if he couldn't hear you. 

"Junior," you tried again. "Did you plan me a surprise birthday party?"

"No idea what you're talking about," he said, finally meeting your eye, but he was an awful liar. He always had been. 

You grinned. "That's so cute," you told him, resting a hand on his chest. "I would love that."

Jungkook beamed adorably. "Really? You would? I mean, uh - that would be nice of you to say, if someone had theoretically planned you a party, which they definitely have not, as in, not even a little bit."

Nia snorted at his awkwardness, making you giggle.

"I love you," you uttered. It felt amazing to just say it, plain and simple, for no reason other than you wanted to say it, to tell him how much you appreciated him.

Jungkook's gaze brightened, his expression shining. "I love you too," he murmured, making you feel like you were glowing as his lips pressed against yours.

"Oh, don't mind me, I'm just an illusion," Nia rolled her eyes before you lost yourself in him once more, moving past you two towards the golf buggy. "Now hurry up, lovebirds! It's been a long day, and I have a Namjoon to smooch."

You grinned and conceded, walking with Jungkook to the buggy, his hand laced in yours.

You had a feeling that tomorrow might be your best birthday yet.

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