Chapter Thirty-Four

Over the next few days, Aizawa keeps me fairly close as I'm questioned by multiple people from the hero association and the police force alike. As it turns out, the masked villains' organization is apparently the main focus these days and my encounter with them that night has become just another piece of the puzzle. Even Endeavor had his time for questioning, though I feel he took it a bit differently than the others. Word got around school too, especially after Shiori and Bakugo were seen dragging my limp body to the infirmary. Almost everyone expressed their concern in the following days, but today as I try to limber up for another day of training, I'm met by an unexpected companion.

"Hey" Shoto says, walking up to me on the track in the early hours of the morning. My stomach drops, but I ignore it as I throw my headphones over my shoulder.

"Hey, what's up?" I ask, feeling incredibly awkward. Ever since Bakugo and I kind of became official, it's been even harder to see Shoto... when I actually do see him that is.

"I heard about the incident with the masked villains... are you okay?" he wonders, not looking at me. I look away from him now, guilt and worry making my stomach and chest hurt. How can he still care about something like that? About me?

"I'm fine..." I reply quietly, wishing I didn't have to feel so much pain every time I saw him.

"I... was worried" he admits. I look back at him and see that he's finally looking at me, eyes filled with sadness. I wish I could erase it for him... make it better somehow. My lower lip quivers a little and I curse internally. I can't cry now, it's not fair. To either of us.

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to worry you" I reply. Shoto sighs, looking away again and adjusting his expression.

"I don't like not speaking to you" he tells me, filling me with surprise.

"It's not that I like making you feel guilty or that I particularly enjoy torturing myself by being around you, but... I don't want to avoid you anymore" he adds. I can tell it's a struggle to say for him, but I'm glad he said it. The bittersweet feeling in my chest only grows and I can't help but feel the slightest bit more complete with him around.

"I don't want you to either... you're important to me... Shoto" I say. He looks at me suddenly with wide eyes, warring emotions on his face. I know how he feels in that, how much of a struggle it is to maintain that balance when you once felt so much for someone. How is it possible to remain friends then? To be close and yet, not as close as you once were? How do we proceed without causing one another more pain?

"So we're friends now?" he wonders and I let out a nervous laugh, hardly able to breathe right.

"I hope we can be" I confirm. Shoto sighs heavily, a strange look on his face.

"I don't see another viable option, do you?" he asks. I give him a look.

"You always have the option, Shoto... if you decide that being friends is too much, I won't try to stay close to you... but I won't lie to you either. Bakugo and I are together now and he's around... a lot. If that's too much for you..." I start, but he waves me off.

"Of course it's too much, but is it really worse than not seeing you at all?" he counters, then sighs again in exasperation, like it's a question that's been plaguing him a while.

"I'd rather have to deal with that than to ever hear from someone else again that you almost died when I wasn't there. Or have to stop myself from seeing you to make sure you're alright out of fear of overstepping my bounds" he shakes his head, a look of determination on his face.

"I never want to feel that way again, regardless of what that makes us to one another" he finishes. My chest warms and I desperately want to give him a hug, but I refrain, knowing it would only complicate things.

"Okay" is what I say instead and when Shoto looks at me, he actually smiles.

"Mind if I run with you?" he asks. I smile back, shaking my head.

"Not at all" I reply and the two of us start running. We don't talk much, in fact, we stay mostly silent as we exercise, but the comfort that comes with his presence and the relief that comes with finally being able to connect with him again makes all of my anxiety disappear. I try not to count on it too much, but a bud of hope blooms in my chest. When we finally finish our run, the two of us part ways pleasantly and when I head inside to shower, I feel better than I have in a long time.

Once I'm clean and dressed for the day, I go down into the shared kitchen to grab something for breakfast, only to run into Jiro and Yaoyorozu sharing a moment. I flush, looking away from them perched at the counter, Yaoyorozu leaning in towards Jiro and stealing a bite of the biscuit that's in her mouth.

"Morning!" I say, trying to announce myself so they don't have to feel too embarrassed.

"Good morning" Yaoyorozu says quietly, not taking her eyes off her girlfriend. Jiro's face grows extremely red, but they don't break apart regardless.

"Good morning" she echoes. I smirk, grabbing a granola bar out of the cabinet and starting back towards the front door.

"See ya!" I call out, smirk growing into a smile. The two of them are probably the cutest couple I've ever seen. That is... they were the cutest couple... I pause at the front door, a smile on my face. Hm. I turn back and walk upstairs instead, knowing I have plenty of time before I've gotta be at the agency anyway. I tuck my granola bar into one of my pockets as I walk and when I get to Bakugo's door, I knock lightly. The door swings open after a few moments revealing a freshly showered Bakugo, hair still wet and tank top pulled on hastily over a pair of thin pajama pants. I smile a little, leaning against the door frame.

"Good morning" I murmur, feeling suddenly brave.

"Kaida... what are you doing here?" he demands, but his heart's not in it. If I had to guess, he's as intrigued by me being here as I am. I tilt my head, making a face as if I'm trying to determine the reason myself.

"That's a good question... but it's pretty early in the morning and while I could have gone into the agency early... I realized what I really wanted... was a little quality time" I reply, looking him straight in the eyes. He blinks at me, definitely wondering how to respond. His speechlessness is rare and makes me laugh.

"Quality time?" he reiterates and I nod, walking up to him and grabbing the door from his hand.

"Quality time" I confirm, shutting the door behind me and pulling him into a kiss. He makes a noise against my mouth, stumbling backwards when I push him towards his bed. He sits immediately, trying to catch his breath when we break apart.

"This is new" he murmurs, eyes wide and expectant on mine. I climb on top of him, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"Kiss me" I whisper. He complies easily, holding me closer and kissing me deeply, the taste of toothpaste on his lips almost as intoxicating as the smell of him. I run my hands through his hair, knotting my fingers in it and relishing in the sound of his responding groan. Before long, he lifts me off of him, shifting us so that I'm lying on my back and he's hovering over me, staring at me in unrestrained yearning.

"Good idea?" I ask him, smiling when I see the smoke curling off of him.

"Best you've ever had" he agrees, claiming my lips in another kiss. I pull myself against him, holding him tightly and kissing him eagerly. His hands travel over me, emanating heat even through my clothing, and I gasp when he hooks one behind my knee, wrapping my leg around him and pressing against me. Where part of me might've hesitated before, I can't get enough of him now and I respond to his every touch with enthusiasm, pulling him closer and closer still. Bakugo doesn't hesitate either, shedding clothes and kissing every part of me that he can find. It's an intense and exhilarating feeling and seeing him like this... so focused on something that doesn't directly involve his near constant rage, is a high unlike any other.

"Hey..." he says after a bit, pausing to examine my face with a gaze gentler than I've ever seen it. I bite my lip, looking up at him expectantly.

"What is it?" I murmur, leaning my face into his palm and kissing the center of it. His hands are always so warm... and oddly enough, they always smell like smoke and sugar. The perfect combination.

"I don't always know how to say what's on my mind... it pisses me off to even think about it sometimes... but, you're it for me too. It's... always gonna be you" he tells me, voice gruff and cheeks a bit red. My whole face flushes as he looks away and my heart stops completely. Bakugo's right, he's really not much for words, especially when it comes to feelings. Not that I am, but for him to say something this forward and this real... it blows me away. I don't even know how to respond or what to feel whether it's fear or joy, but I instinctively wrap my arms around him and yank him down on top of me. He grunts, gasping against my grip as I hug him, squeezing my eyes shut.

"Kaida" he groans, breathless from my iron hold. I shake my head against his neck, overwhelmed by whatever emotions have my heart racing and my stomach quivering.

"You idiot, don't say things like that all of a sudden" I grumble against the bare skin of his shoulder. He tries to push himself up, but my grip is too tight and he starts to chuckle a little.

"What are you doing? Stop it!" he laughs, trying to sound serious even as I squeeze the breath out of him.

"No" I mutter, squeezing him harder.

"Kaida!" he complains, but I don't know what to do. I can't look at him after he said all that, not with the redness in my face or the hope in my eyes, but once he realizes I'm not letting go, he grabs me back, wrapping his arms around me and squeezing just as tight. My eyes widen, organs screaming.

"Okay!" I gasp, releasing him immediately and gasping for air when he follows suit, smirking down at me.

"Loser" he teases. I frown up at him, impressed by how confident I am in front of him, despite our lack of clothing.

"You fight dirty" I retort, grabbing his comforter to cover myself. He raises an eyebrow, giving me a challenging expression.

"How so?" he demands and my face grows red again.

"Because... you can't just say things like that and..."

"And what?" he murmurs, getting close to me again, his face right next to mine. At first, it feels like fun and games, but the longer I stare at him, the more the weight of his words settle into me. I can't look at him like this and not feel something. I can't sit here with him, talking about these things, and not start to realize all the things I can't admit to myself yet. Staring at him like this... watching him smile and laugh with me, kissing him like I'll never get another chance... it makes my heart hurt in ways I never thought could be good. It feels like flying and falling all at once, like breathing fresh air after months of choking or tasting the freshest water after getting lost in the desert. It's as intense, if not more intense, than the power coursing through my veins with every beat of my heart and it feels like an extension of myself. So quickly, Bakugo has become someone I don't feel I can live without and that thought terrifies me.

"And make me feel..." I meet his eyes and I can tell he's waiting for it, part of me is too, but my heart beats so loudly that it drowns out the thoughts and the fear within me holds the words back, showing no sign of letting them go. I swallow, the two emotions trying to overpower each other. He reaches up to caress my cheek, his eyes conveying more than he could ever say aloud, and I almost speak again. I almost let it out this time... when a knock sounds at the door and Deku's voice comes through.

"Are you up, Kaa-chan? We'll be late" he calls and Bakugo's expression goes from gentle to pissed off in a millisecond.

"Damn Deku!" he snaps. I clap a hand over my mouth as I giggle, trying not to be heard as Deku apologizes profusely through the door. Bakugo shakes his head, leveling an irritated gaze at me.

"Later" he tells me, the word holding more promise than anything else he could've said. I swallow and nod, getting up with him and getting dressed for the third time today. Maybe I would have told him how I really felt in those moments, but part of me is glad that I didn't. At least not yet. Admitting to feelings like those... it isn't something I'm good at, not only for the sake of my pride, but for the fear of putting myself out there and ultimately getting destroyed. It's already been proven to me that even the ones closest to you are able to run you through with the blade of betrayal and I'm just not ready to see Bakugo like that. I'd rather stay here in whatever this is, constantly questioning just how far we'll go, but happy to be where we are. No real promises and yet, all of the potential in the world. Right on the edge of something great.

"You ready?" he asks and I look him up and down, his sculpted chest and shoulders standing out in his hero uniform. I bite my lip and nod, making a face.

"To do what?" I ask and his eyes widen behind his mask.

"K-Kaida!" he scolds, looking away from me. I try not to smirk and shrug my shoulders, walking towards the door.

"I'm just saying" I tell him, enjoying him being the flustered one for once.

"You can't just say things like that" he growls as we leave his room and I turn around to gape at him.

"Oh really? Things like what?" I demand, coming to a halt in front of a startled Deku. I freeze and Bakugo stares, both of us surprised that he actually waited.

"D-did... you guys just... come out... together?" he stammers, eyes wide and expression indescribable. I try to say something, but no sound comes out of my mouth. Bakugo just walks ahead, scoffing as he leaves the two of us behind.

"Yeah, so what?" he demands, managing his cool attitude just like always. I gape after him, cheeks flaming as my eyes dart between him and a mortified Deku. Deku mumbles to himself in that insane way he does whenever something starts to add up and my embarrassment cranks up a notch.

"Oh my god, please don't do that" I say, yanking him up by his shirt sleeve and dragging him down the hall after Bakugo.

"Y-you and Kaa-chan?" he still stammers. For the love of god.

"Deku can you turn your brain off just once? One time? And forget this happened?" I demand, only irritable out of embarrassment. Deku doesn't actually stop and I don't actually make him, but as we make our way to the agency behind Bakugo, I find myself getting used to the idea of being Bakugo's girlfriend. And not just in the way that people are when they kind of like each other, but in the more serious kind of way... the way that prompted Bakugo to shrug his shoulders like the two of us sharing a room shouldn't be news. Yeah... I think I'm starting to like that idea.