Epilogue: Prospective

welcome to the final chapter ❤️ 

writing this story during such a meaningful time in my life was very special to my heart. 

thank you kindly so much for reading it ~ i'll always love you Xx

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

I had to say goodbye to Freddie today. He's flying out to Lyon, and I have to get back home. There is work waiting for me to be done there. Eleanor is accompanying me, and I hope that it will help distract me from the ache.

I'm even considering telling her everything. Having been my best friend for so long, I feel like she deserves to know. I don't like hiding things from her–they feel too much like lying. And there are already things I'm unable to gather the courage to say to her. This is something she'll understand, I'm sure.

Leaving him was a weird moment–one I definitely didn't want to do, but we didn't have any other choice. For now, at least. I came to Paris not expecting any romantic connection with anyone–let alone with a man from my past. He was in my thoughts for so long, but I was stubborn enough to even think about reaching out. It seems as if he was my soulmate all along. It seems that fate works in mysterious ways, but I can't complain. I'm happier than I have been in the longest time.

Freddie makes me happy. He really does. It's the kind of happiness that you dream about as a little girl... The kind of happiness you start thinking isn't obtainable once you're older. Yet here it is. I'm experiencing it.

I know that it has all happened so quickly, but I can't deny that it feels right. I can see myself spending the rest of my life with him already. Gosh, just writing that sounds so cheesy–what kind of a woman am I turning into?

With Freddie, I feel safe and secure, and I know our separation is only temporary. We both have built our own lives that we need to live, but I know we will find time for each other. We're worth it. What we have is worth it.

The chemistry was still there–from the moment we set eyes on each other, the craving was there. It's something so illogical, yet something so impossible to ignore.

I never thought I'd feel a bond like this with another person. When I'm with him, everything feels alright. I don't feel like a monster. I don't feel worthless. It's like he helps me forget about all those ugly parts of me that my family had constantly pointed out. I just feel like... me. I don't need to pretend I'm someone I'm not. He accepts me for who I am. He shows me that I am enough, just as I am, and I want to drown in that feeling forever. It is, perhaps, the most important feeling I have ever had a chance to experience.

When I'm with him... I'm unable to get enough of him. I'm unable to keep my hands off him. Never have I craved a man that way before–it's surely a recipe to my own insanity.

I'm missing him already, and it's only been hours. We've discussed our options regarding when we can see each other again. Neither of us feels like we can handle being away from each other for too long. I should be done with one photoshoot next week, and I could fly out to see him in London. That's not too bad, is it?

A part of me hates that we spent years away from each other... But our future starts now, and it's everything I ever imagined my happily every after to be.