Chapter 13

Lauren's PoV

I walked in the door, tears streaming down my face.

"Lo? Are you okay?" Julia asked. I didn't answer, I just kept walking. "Lo!? You're scaring me come on tell me what's wrong. Please" she persisted. Again I kept on walking towards my room, a look of defeat on my face. I got into my room and shut the door just before Julia walked in. "Lo?" she pleaded at the door. I didn't answer. I just rolled up into a ball on my bed and silently let the tears soak my sheets.

--

I woke up and looked at the clock. 7:34 pm. I shuffled out of bed and into the living room. Julia's attention darted from the TV to me. "Oh my god Lo you had me so worried. Are you okay? Do you need anything? Do you want to talk about it?" I know she was trying to comfort me, but the only way I could respond was by letting my tears fall. "Do you want to... not talk about it?" she asked. I nodded and walked over to her.

She sat me down on the couch, wrapped me in her arms, and gently rocked me while stroking my hair and telling me everything would be alright. She was always such a comfort. Eventually my tears subsided and I just laid there in her arms for a while. Finally she said, "I'm not pressuring you at all, but if you want to talk about it, I'm here to listen."

"I tried giving him more chances and nothing. He doesn't feel the same, Julia. He never will and now I'm going to go to New York and be alone forever."

"Lauren you most definitely not going to be alone forever. You've got great friends here in Chicago who will all be dying to visit you once you're gone. And besides that, you're one of the hottest tickets around and any guy with eyes can see that. Someone will come along for you and that someone will be perfect. He might be in New York, he might be in Chicago, hell, who knows, maybe he's in Cleveland. But wherever he is, he's out there and he's going to love you more than anyone else ever could. Guys can wait, right now you need to get your career going and live in this moment, however far it may take you."

"You're right" I said,  more hopeful. "I need to forget about guys and go to New York. Not even my nerves and concerns can hold me back now. I'm going to move and I'm gonna be great!"

"There you go! See I knew all you needed was a good pep talk. How about I arrange one last hoorah, a farewell to Lauren Lopez, for the time being that is."

"That sounds perfect Julia. Can we do the day before I leave? That way everyone will still be fresh in my memories when I have to go."

"Sounds like a plan" she said. "You just sit back and I'll take care of everything."

~(at the party)~

"Thank you so much for putting all this together, Julia. It turned out great. I couldn't think of any other way to say goodbye to all of you." I said.

"Anything for you my d-dear LoLo" she slurred. Clearly she's been spending a bit of time at the make-shift bar that she had stocked full.

"Okay Julia. You have fun now" I said giggling. She walked away and I started to scan the room. At first I didn't know what I was looking for. Then I realized it wasn't a what, but a who and that that who was Joey. I had mostly gotten past the painful part of leaving him and I just wanted to spend time with him before I left because I knew I would regret it if I didn't. I continued to look around until finally, I spotted him. He was on the couch talking to someone. Hmm who is that? If they could just turn a little more... Oh it's Denise. Then I saw that Joey's arm was on the couch behind her. It wasn't around her shoulders or anything but this still sent a bit of pain through my body. Why was he so close to her? This is my goodbye party. Why isn't he spending every minute he can with me. Oh come on Lo this is no use. You're leaving tomorrow and nothing is going to stop you. No regrets. I decided to head outside to help clear my mind of any inhibitions. It was a bit chilly out for my liking, but I stayed anyways.

I couldn't have been out there more than a few minutes before I felt someone come up behind me and put their arm around me. I turned to see it was Joey. I was half tempted to pull away, but he was so warm and I was not.

"My god Lo, you're shivering like crazy" he said. "Here, take this sweatshirt." He offered it up and I took it gratefully.

"Thanks" I said as I slipped into the warmth.

"Listen Lo... I've got to talk to you. For real this time. So I need you to not say anything til I'm done okay?"

"Okay?" I responded. What could he have to say?

"Anyways here goes nothing... So these past couple months I've been feeling... some things... about you. You know, like the feeling kind of feelings. And that's really a big part of why Mariah and I broke up. I realized, well actually she realized, that I really like you and that the connection we have is something really special to me. I know this job could be really important to you and I understand if you don't feel the same and you still want to go, but... I don't know. I thought maybe you might consider staying. With me?"

Oh my god. Did he really just say that? After all this time? How could he just spring that on me so last minute? I mean this is what I've wanted out of him all along, but I leave tomorrow. What am I going to do about this?

I could feel him staring at me waiting for my response and I know he's been waiting at least a few minutes, but I can't make my mouth say anything. The words aren't coming. I just stood there, looking around in disbelief.

Joey's PoV (at the party)

I'm going to tell Lauren how I feel tonight. But I can't. Shut up, yes you can. Ugh this is making me so nervous. I can't believe I'm going to do this. I'll get to it eventually, but for now I can just mingle with other people, right? Yeah that works. I grabbed a drink and walked around the party a little bit before running into Denise. I hadn't seen her in a while so I decided to sit down and chat with her. We talked for nearly an hour. I knew I would have to be talking to Lo soon. I searched the room for her while Denise went on about her current boyfriend. I spotted her talking to Julia, who by the way was looking a little unstable. I laughed to myself and started trying to wrap things up with Denise. I threw my arm over the back of the couch in anticipation of giving her a hug and saying goodbye, but she was taking forever. My god, could she go on. Finally she finished up what she was saying and I said how good it was to see her again, but that I had some business to take care of. I looked up just in time to see Lauren's tiny body heading outside. Where could she be going? And without a coat... it's freezing out. I better hurry up now. I gave Denise a quick hug and hurried to the door grabbing a sweatshirt for Lauren on my way out.

She seemed to be shivering, but too deep in thought to notice it. I went up behind her and put my arm around her shoulders. She flinched a little and looked back to see me. She seemed as though she was about to pull away, but then she stayed where she was.

"My god Lo, you're shivering like crazy." I offered her the sweatshirt, which she quickly accepted and slipped on. She looked so cute in that oversized thing.

"Thanks" she said.

I decided it would be best to just go for it. "Listen Lo... I've got to talk to you. For real this time. So I need you to not say anything til I'm done okay?"

She agreed, though she seemed confused. I went on to tell her how I had been feeling about her the past couple months and how it had actually been Mariah who helped me realize it and that that was a big part of the reason we broke up. Then I asked her to stay with me, to give it a go, but that I understood if she didn't feel the same.

All she did was look at me. After a minute or so she started looking all around her with a look in her eyes I couldn't quite place. What was she thinking? Why wasn't she answering? It has to have been at least five minutes now. I'm going to have to say something soon if she doesn't. Come on Lo, just say something. Anything.