Chapter 18

I was going to post this tonight or maybe tomorrow to give some time in between but we all know me and we know I'm addicted to posting. So here ya go, an update 12 hours later.

Get the tissue box ready.

Hailey's POV

I can see it in his face, in all of their faces. They're all mourning a tremendous loss and have no idea how to handle it. Even Louis hasn't spoken in two days and it's impossible to shut Louis up.

After the night Harry came to the cabin we returned to the house the next morning, nothing more than two words were exchanged between all of us. I think when we got home is when I reached my all time low. There was no cleaning up that had been done. Rebecca was in the corner of the living room, curled over as her body bled out, stabbed in different areas with two wooden stakes in her heart. As I walked into the back room is when what I saw was unbearable. Liam's dead body was face first into the ground. What hurt the most was that he looked okay besides one wound in his heart that had created a minor blood stain in his shirt. This gave me hope that it was quick, but starring at his body made me feel as if he was still here. And for some reason I wasn't completely freaked out or grossed out because it was Liam.

Once we got home and found the bodies there was no one we could call to help dispose of the bodies so they burned Rebecca and then they dealt with Liam. They made it look as if he was attacked by and animal in the woods and bled out, this way a proper service could be held. The service was in two days and I had no idea how I was going to say goodbye because even though I haven't known any of them for long; Liam was the brother I always wish I could have.

I called Annie and told her what happened and she was quick to come over, comforting all of us, Zayn the most. Her and Zayn have grown close lately, and I think that maybe Zayn is finally giving up this ass hole act and letting someone in. I've been watching all of them, observing how they're dealing with this.

Zayn's been with Annie.

Louis has been distracting himself with cleaning or something.

Niall is in denial.

and Harry is the worst. He sits there and just stare into space, not saying a word and not even blinking. It's like I've lost him for real this time and I'm watching it happen infront of my eyes.

----

Everyone was inside talking, distracting themselves from what they really were thinking as Annie told some stupid jokes and Louis, Niall and Zayn pretended to laugh along. It was the first time I had seen any of them even show teeth in the past 48 hours.

And Harry, he was sitting on the back porch, leaning his elbows on his knees as he buried his face into his hands. Every time I tried to talk to him he shut me out; either not saying anything or just simply getting up and leaving.

This time I wasn't going to take no for an answer, I wasn't going to let him get up and walk away from me. I was going to force him to talk to me about it because if he doesn't and keeps this inside, I know what he is capable of and it scares me.

I walked onto the back porch where he was and he turned his head slightly, looking at me from the corner of his eyes that were puffy from crying so much. I sighed and closed the door behind me, walking over to him and running my hand up his back. He leaned back and I crawled onto his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck as I hugged him tightly and buried my head into his neck. His arms hung over my legs as he sighed into me, lowering his head down as I kissed his cheek.

"Talk to me." I whispered. He stiffened a bit and I pulled back, brushing a perfect spiral curl out of his face.

"I cant." He trembled back, shaking his head. I got off of him and pulled the chair over beside him, placing my hand on his knee.

"Harry you know that if you don't talk--."

"I'll go crazy, I know. I know i'll go on a spree but I just cant talk about it Hailey. I cant say it out loud." He cut me off, running his hands through his hair, making his fists into tight balls turning his knuckles white.

"Harry you're suffering a great loss, we all are." I said making him hang his head so I couldn't look in his eyes.

"My brother, my best friend, was killed and I drove to wooden steaks through that bitches heart and I still don't feel as if we are even." He said quietly as I rubbed his knee.

"We all miss him." I said making him look up at him finally.

"But you didn't find his dead body. You didn't wake up to Rebecca laughing as she snapped his neck, forcing me to watch. You didn't take someone's life from them." He said loudly, I could hear the frustration in his voice.

"I cant begin to feel what you feel, but we all are breaking here and we need each other." I said as his eyes wandered out over the forest.

"The scary part is I liked it. I know you don't want to hear me say it, but I got satisfaction out of killing her. I liked watching the life drain from those devilish eyes of hers." He said in a monotone voice, frightening me.

"I'm sorry. I know you didn't want to hear that." He said looking up at me as his lips began to tremble again, the tears starting up. I stood up and returned to the position I was in, sitting on his lap and holding onto him tightly as he squeezed me, sobbing into me.

"Shh, it'll be okay. We will make it through, we always do." I said beginning to cry myself, because this made it all real. Liam wasn't coming back. "I miss him too." I stuttered as I turned my head into his neck. Suddenly it was like the roles were reversed and he was comforting me now. That's what I loved about Harry, he can be in his darkest state like right now and yet he's wanting to comfort me, wanting to make sure i'm okay.

"Liam loved you like a little sister Hail, he wanted you safe just as much as I wanted you safe." He whispered making me nod. Liam was like the big brother I never had. The one that watched over me when I was too stubborn to watch out for myself. He was always there with the first aid kit, he was always up for the late night chats. I could tell him anything, I loved him like a brother. I love him like a brother.

"I love you Harry." I mumbled into him as he held onto me tightly. "I'm never loosing you." I added as he kissed my cheek, lingering there for a bit.

"I'm never leaving. I love you too Hailey." He said as I wrapped my arms around his neck, squeezing my eyes shut.

We stayed like that for a bit before Harry finally got up, returning inside to talk to the others for the first time since the morning they all left. I stayed back and took the position that Harry had been in for the past two days. I starred out over the back yard and imagined it happening. They came out here to fight because as soon as they were out here I ran off. She must have dragged him inside to kill him, his body was just found right in the back room.

I shook my head, not wanting to play detective for this case, not Liam's case.

I leaned back in the chair starring at ground. Liam fought her so I could escape, he saved my life and for that I owe him my life. He died so I could continue living.

Lately it seems that everyone is stopping what they're doing to keep me safe, and don't get me wrong I like feeling wanted but Liam went as far as to get killed and that makes me feel responsible.

Have you ever lost someone? A parents, a sibling, a bestfriend, a grandparents, someone you barely talked to at school.

You'll understand this emptiness I feel. I have this since of sadness that is always lingering and in the back of my mind is where the guilt creeps up on me. I constantly feel nothing but three things; depressed, guilty, and empty. I know that the boys emotions are heightened and seeing them deal with it tells me I can deal with it but theres such a big part of me missing it's like I really lost a brother.

I got up and a new emotion started pulsing through my body, anger. I kicked the chair over and let a scream out, grabbing onto my hair as I fell onto the ground sobbing. Even though she was dead, I was going to get back at Rebecca. I'd find a way to bring her back to life just so I could rip her heart out. I'd kill someone she loves just so she can feel this, so she can feel as worthless as I feel.

"Hailey." A quiet voice said from the door way. I looked up and Annie came outside, a worrying look on her face. I frowned, closing my eyes as I began to sob again. She bent down and picked me up, guiding me back in the house and up the stairs. I didn't have to look to know that the 4 boys were starring at me. As we walked up the stairs I looked over my shoulder to find the four boys fitting on one couch and it was weird to see that. Weird to see four of them on one couch instead of the usual; four on one couch and one on the chair in the corner. I turned my head into Annie as she rubbed my shoulder, I just needed a best friend.

What I really needed was Liam.