{13}

[WARNING: This chapter depicts sexual intimacy.]

I stalked, aimlessly, with the subconscious goal of finding him.

Why I wanted to find him so badly, well, it was hard to place. But I had several theories:

Revenge.

Anger.

Grief.

And something else. Something that pitied him. Something that pitied me. A hole in my heart.

The beast stirred in my chest.

I hid in the trees, my dark attire aiding in the endeavor.

My breath caught in the crisp air, cold vapors.

They were all exhausted, and I couldn't blame them. Their new armor surely made it worse.

Added weight. 

Shoulders.

Though I'd been a part of their ruthlessness, seen what they were capable of, I knew what they were.

Human.

Like me. I thought.

Well, human in form. In mind, many lacked.

After what felt like an hour of watching. waiting. I finally caught sight of what I wanted.

And I saw her.

Yennefer.

You kept your promise.

The Black Knight. No.

Cahir.

I felt my heart skip a beat. And the butterflies.

The beast stirred.

And the sun started the set. 

The Nilfgaardian soldiers who'd arrived previously were already out. Snores and groans of pain commonly permeated the empty air. The others nearly followed suit.

Though, of course, not until they'd set up Cahir's tent.

Darkness enveloped the sky.

And they'd all slept, save the tent which still stirred, a faint light held in its core.

I edged closer.

and closer.

I readied my daggers, creeping into the tent, only to find the officer and general sat on a makeshift bed, half dozed off.

He too, I realized, was tired.

Of the fighting.

Of the Death. Dear Death.

I stood then, hotness in my face, scolding water pushing to leave my eyes.

I gripped my daggers, clenched my teeth, glaring down at the vulnerable man.

But I caught, like my breath, as the air'd done.

And he stirred.

They opened. Those eyes. They went wide.

His lips parted, frozen.

But I couldn't do it. I couldn't strike.

Because then I saw it. He was a man.

Not a Black Knight. No titles.

Just a man.

And we stayed there, hot tears streaming down my face as he looked up at me mesmerized.

Dryly he said, "why are you crying?"

The beast stirred.

He stood slowly, only to warrant me lifting my daggers higher.

"Mirabel," he said weakly, his voice breaking.

Through clenched teeth, "you don't get to call me that."

He swallowed hard. He was scared. Sad. Ambitious.

My daggers, they slid from my hands and fell hard to the floor, and I screamed like an animal, roared like a Lioness, right to his face.

A pause, then again I roared, my face twisting in agony and rage.

He inched closer, and I thought a moment that that was it. I'd die then and there.

But instead, I felt something warm.

His arms around me.

And I cried, sobbed.

Hitting my fists against his chest.

I let the chaos out.

But instead of flames, there was warmth.

And at that moment, I pushed him from me sharply. He nearly fell, his shirt stained with my tears, and I couldn't look at him for a while. But when I did, his eyes watered.

Where was the ruthless Cahir, the one who didn't care for me, now?

"Mira, please," he pleaded, stepping forward.

The beast stirred.

A sharp ray of purple-black smoke stepped in front of me, nearly slicing his throat.

But it didn't.

I shook my head, lowered it.

And he stepped even closer.

Butterflies.

And I rushed forward.

I kissed him, passionately.

Tousled my hand through his hair.

He placed a hand on my back, pulling me closer to his body.

Our lips collided greedily.

And I released the Beast.

I leaned my head back as he licked my neck, delicately placing hickeys where his lips could reach. 

I moaned softly, a strange heat between my legs and tingling in my lower stomach.

Butterflies.

His hand traveled up to the nape of my neck, unbuttoning the top of my shirt, and untying my corset. Loosely on my body, the corset allowed access to the rest of the buttons of my top.

Yearning in his eyes, he pulled back a moment, "Mirabel..."

His face red, a bead of sweat down the side of his face, "I want this, but do you-"

I hissed, "-I want you."

That seemed to cause the flames in his eyes to roar. He pushed my top and corset from my torso, gently placing a hand on my left breast while holding me with his right. I pushed him toward his make-shift bed, tripping him, and we fell to the soft padding.

I sat atop him as he placed his lips on my collarbone, traveling to my breasts and caressing my nipples with his tongue. I moaned in ecstasy, leaning my head back. His hands were placed on my hips, pushing me down on his hard manhood.

I grabbed his shirt, ripping it from his chest, sliding my hands down to his pants as he kissed my breasts. I pushed his pants down as I pushed him down, kissing him lustfully. 

I reached in.

Felt its heat as he moaned.

He rolled me on my back then, removing my boots and pulling my pants down. He kissed me again while placing a hand on my womanhood. I arched my back as his fingers found their way.

After a moment, he pulled his manhood from his pants and kissed me passionately as he pushed himself in. My fingers dug into his back, pain, and ecstasy rushed through me.

He thrust gently as we kissed each other, stealing heavy breaths when we could.

And, after several minutes of pain, moaning, sweat, and ecstasy, he groaned as something warm filled me.

Warmth.

The Beast was warning me.

The Butterflies too.

We sat there a moment, breathing, then I pushed him under me.

I stared down at him, "why do you care for me?"

He did something so beautiful, smiled. Then cried.

"I realized how valuable you are to me. I cherish you."

I cried then, "I love you."

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[Okay everyone, I am officially going to dig a hole and hide in it.]