XLII

June 19th, 2021

Takahiro gives me Kenma vibes. He's Kenma but a fox. 

All my work got deleted for this chapter yesterday. It really sucked. I rewrote it all.

'...I've lost too many people close to me.' 

The noises from the match faded into the background in Kita's mind.

'First my parents when I was five. Then my grandfather... then my aunt and uncle when I was 11. Then Karu-chan- he's not dead, but he might as well be. I lost him as a friend.

'The one that hurt most was Karu. I knew him best- he was the only person who understood me back then. He's also the only one I can win back. I wish... I wish I had the courage to even talk to him.'

Kita remembered their last conversation- they had exchanged a few words about the practice match, and that was all. They hadn't truly talked for almost two years now. Kita was sure his cousin resented him- Karu couldn't play volleyball because he'd saved Kita that day. Kita was free to continue his career, but Karu couldn't-

"Senpai!"

Kita shook his head; Isuma was standing before him, waving her hand in front of his face. "You okay?"

"Yes. What's wrong?"

"The score!"

Kita followed Isuma's gaze; his eyes widened. "That's..."

The rest of his sentence- 'not possible'- died in his throat. How long had he zoned out- and how was Mailo TIED with them?!

The score was 17:17. Already. How? Had he really been lost in thought that long? "How..."

Kita's eyes were darting back and forth across the court. What had happened in the past few minutes? Everyone looked fine... "Isuma, are they all-"

"We're not doing bad. They're just doing well, Senpai." The right side of her face was still a little red close to her jaw; it must've hurt, but she didn't seem to notice. "Like you said- they really want to beat us, right?"

Her tone was surprisingly reassuring. "You don't think we might lose, do you?"

"No... but if Karu-chan was playing, it would've been a possibility."

Everyone looked at him. "Who?"

"Their captain. Hiroshima Karu is one of the most skilled volleyball players I've ever met. If it weren't for his... accident, he might be better than even your brothers, Isuma." Kita said. Kosaku asked, "How do you know him?"

"...we used to be friends. That's not important. My point is, while Karu-chan doesn't actually play, he still helps his team enough that he's captain. He's not only physically talented: he's the intelligence behind Mailo- like you, Isuma."

They momentarily fell silent to watch Ginjima serve. It sailed over the net perfectly... but Mailo's libero also received it perfectly. Atsumu cursed a little too loudly as their setter sent it to their outside hitter. Atsumu exclaimed, "Aran Senpai!"

"Mine!!"

They secured another point, now three points ahead of Mailo. This didn't seem to discourage them- if anything, they tried even harder, moved even faster. '...this is Karu-chan's last chance. His team's last chance. It's... partially my fault they haven't ever won against us. If Karu-chan hadn't saved me that day- if I'd been hit instead of him- he could've won at least once.'

Inarizaki was now at 24. Kita caught himself breathing a sigh of relief when Mailo managed to snag another point. Isuma noticed but didn't say anything. '...he must've been very close to Hiroshima Karu.'

Her eyes landed on Hiroshima, who was watching the court with an identical expression of concentration. At that moment, he and Kita shared the same thoughts, the same mind.

'Are you watching this, Karu-chan?'

'Are you watching this, Shin-chan?'

'Today's our last official match against one another, and neither of us are playing.'

'If I had to lose my last match, I'm glad I lost it to you.'

This last rally was taking breathtakingly long; time was passing frustratingly slow. A small part of Kita wanted the volleyball to never drop, so he'd never have to see the outcome.

Atsumu set the ball to his brother, whose spike was received by Mailo's setter. "Yu!!"

"I have it!!" The middle blocker jumped up and spiked so powerfully Akagi almost missed it- almost. "Atsumu, get the last!!"

"'Samu!!" Atsumu set it for his brother, a little hesitant. "Bring it, you idiot!!!"

Osamu's line shot cut it so fine the referees took a few seconds to call it. "In!!"

The referee blew his whistle, but it was drowned amidst the screaming of the crowd and the band. Kita let out his breath, closing his eyes. 'It's over... Karu-chan.'

Kita didn't know what to do when he reached Hiroshima. The other players had all shaken hands and retreated to their benches. Kita couldn't even meet his eyes properly. "Karu-"

Hiroshima ducked under the net and wrapped his arms around his cousin's neck, practically tackling him in a hug. "Shut up. Idiot."

Most of the people in the gym had turned to look at them. Kita couldn't move for a moment. "Karu...chan..."

"Great job." Hiroshima's hold tightened as he let out his breath. "Stupid, idiotic, dumb-"

Kita didn't voice his question- you don't hate me?- but Hiroshima seemed to understand his silence and punched his shoulder. "Of course I don't hate you, dummy!!"

Hiroshima flicked away a tear- he was frustrated with Kita, and that he'd lost his last chance to win, and with everything in general. He pulled away from his cousin, wiping away his tears. "Stupid."

Kita didn't know how to respond. "Karu..."

"You- you idiot!!" Hiroshima raised his voice, pushing Kita back. "I CHOSE to save you back then!! It's not your fault!! It's never been your fault!!! You are so stupid for thinking that!!"

"If it weren't for me-"

"If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have gotten into volleyball in the first place, stupid!" Hiroshima snapped. "Excuse me..."

The two of them turned to look at a staff member. "We need to clean the gym..."

"Right. Sorry."

Hiroshima grabbed Kita's arm before he could go back. "We'll talk later."

"...what?"

"You'll see."

<<Skip to the bus ride>>

Kita was unusually quiet the rest of the day. He didn't even look up when Atsumu and Osamu began arguing for the umpteenth time, and it fell to Akagi and Isuma to restrain them.

Once they arrived, he offered his input on tomorrow's match but didn't speak much otherwise.

Isuma had noticed his unusual attitude throughout the day. "'Suma-chan."

She glanced at Osamu. "Come on."

"-um, I left something here last Friday. I'm going to search for it; you go on ahead." Isuma said. Atsumu answered, "We'll wait."

"No, you should go on! You must be tired; I'll come home by myself."

"You shouldn't-"

"I'll stay-"

"It's fine, go! I'll come a few minutes after you." They protested for another minute or so but eventually gave in. The moment everyone had left, Isuma ran to the club room... and crashed into Kita on the stairs. "Sorry, Senpai!"

"It's fine." He managed a small smile.

"I just wanted to ask... is something wrong?" Isuma asked tentatively. Kita hesitated. He supposed he HAD been visibly distracted all day... "I'm okay. You don't need to worry."Kita swung his bag over his shoulder and took a few steps down; it was a few seconds before he realized she wasn't beside him. "What's wrong?"

She hadn't moved. "You said you'd always be there for me when I needed you, Kita-san." Isuma turned a little pink, but she kept going. "I- I'm here for you too, you know."

She stepped down, directly in front Kita now. He let out his breath, any trace of a smile gone. Kita sat down on the stairs, his expression tired. "...seeing Karu-chan still hurts me."

"Do- do you have something to do with why he can't play volleyball?" Kita looked at her- it was as if she knew exactly what was bothering him. "He's my cousin. I lived with his family for six years."

Isuma didn't say anything- although she wanted to- which he appreciated. "...my parents passed away when I was five. My older sister and my younger brother and lived with our aunt and uncle when I was younger. I think... I was eleven when we moved out."

"Your parents...?" She couldn't finish the thought. Kita answered, "They died in a fire. I don't remember them very well. Anyways... Karu was really the only person I talked to back then. Back then, I suffered emotionally and mentally from the shock of losing my parents. He was my best friend.

"When we were fourteen or fifteen, Karu saved me. He was hit by a truck. That's why he can't play volleyball. It's because of me."

Kita's throat suddenly hurt and he couldn't speak. He placed his head in his knees, shaking. Isuma reached out a hand but retraced it. "Senpai..."

"Stay. Please." His voice was breaking and full of emotion.

Isuma didn't know how to respond; she placed her arm around him gently. Kita leaned against her shoulder and wiped his eyes. "Sorry. I just..."

"Don't worry." Her cheeks were pink, and it had nothing to do with the cold. He closed his eyes when she laced her fingers with his hair carefully. Her skin was warm; the repetitive way she ran her hand through his hair reminded him of something... or someone.

A single memory suddenly surfaced: his five-year-old self on his mother's lap while she ran her fingers through his hair, comforting him. Isuma's touch was exactly the same... he felt so safe and warm, he wanted to stay there forever.

Eventually, Kita's shoulders relaxed and his breaths evened out. He pulled away from her gently. "Sorry. I needed that."

Isuma flashed a small smile. "Don't be. We all need someone to lean on sometimes."

"Yeah... thank you." He felt a lot better- just her strong presence next to him made his problems fade and washed away his worries.

"Come on, your brothers are probably waiting for you. I'll walk you home."

"What? Um, okay." Isuma's cheeks colored at the thought- walking home with Kita!- but she nodded. The sky had darkened in the past few moments- although it was still early- and the street lights had turned on.

"Senpai, your house is in the other direction..."

"It's fine. I at least owe you this. You only stayed back to check on me, right?" Kita dug his hands into his pockets and glanced at her. "Well... yes."

"Plus, your brothers would kill me if I let you walk home alone."

"Possibly. Listen, Kita-san..." Isuma hesitated. "You know Hiroshima Senpai doesn't hate you, right? He hugged you. That's nothing someone who hates you would do."

"That's not it, Isuma. Even if he doesn't hate me, it's still my fault he can't play volleyball. Karu-chan loves volleyball, perhaps even more than your brothers. He was so talented. He wanted to continue with volleyball even after school. I wasn't planning to even back then. If he hadn't saved me, he could be in my place right now. Mailo would be the ones at finals tomorrow."

"But does he regret it?" Isuma asked. Kita didn't reply for a moment. "He said he didn't..."

"That makes a world of a difference, doesn't it?" Isuma answered. "He chose to save you that day. Even if it was a hasty decision, he decided to prioritize you over himself. In my mind... that just shows how much your cousin loves and cares for you. It was his choice."

Before he could think of a response, they arrived at the Miyas' house. Isuma awkwardly said, "Thanks. See you tomorrow, Kita-san."

"Listen-"

She turned back questioningly. Suna's words suddenly came back to him, and he lost the will to continue. "Never mind. See you, Isuma."

Isuma gave him a small smile and wave. He watched her go in; the moment the door closed, his phone rang. "Ari-chan?"

"Shinsuke, when are you coming home? We're going to Oba-san's for dinner."

Kita's heart dropped like a stone. "We're going to Karu-chan's house? Why?"

"Oba-san asked us; I don't know why. When will you be home?" She asked.

"I'll be there in ten minutes."

<<At the Hiroshima's>>

(Kita will be referred to by his first name, Shinsuke, whenever he's with his family)

Kita Hishari, the eldest of the three Kitas, was 24 and earned enough to support all three of them. Their relatives always offered to send money for them, but she stubbornly refused each time. Hishari worked as an assistant to a doctor. Like her brothers, she had silvery hair with small black streaks that fell past her shoulders, and all three shared the same eyes. Both of her brothers were taller than her, something she was constantly reminded about. She had been 11 when they'd lost their parents; the three of them lived under their aunt and uncle's care- Hiroshima Karu's parents- until she'd turned 18 and she'd insisted they move out.

Kita Takahiro was in his last year of middle school and would be going to Inarizaki the next year. He looked exactly like his brother- perhaps half an inch shorter- and his hair was a little longer. He had always been understanding when his sister told him he couldn't have something and had grown up introverted. He shared his brother's love for volleyball and, like him, was a wing spiker.

The three of them were constantly being checked on by their aunt and uncle, but Hishari reassured them every time that they were doing fine on their own.

Their aunt and uncle greeted the three of them enthusiastically when they arrived. Karu shook hands with Takahiro and hugged Hishari, then turned towards Shinsuke. Neither of them said anything. Himura, Karu's mother, motioned for them to come into the living room. "Come in, Hishari!!"

Takahiro followed the others in, but Hishari caught Shinsuke's arm to stop him. "Oba-san, we'll be there in a second."

Shinsuke glanced at his sister. "What, Ari-chan?"

"Shinsuke... try and talk to Karu. Please. I hate seeing the two of you not getting along." She pushed back her hair anxiously. He nodded slightly then followed Takahiro.

Karu and Shinsuke didn't speak to each other at all throughout dinner. Eventually, the conversation turned to volleyball. "So, Takahiro, how did your last match go?"

"Good." He didn't elaborate.

"Shinsuke, Karu, didn't your schools play each other today?"

Shinsuke's grip on his chopsticks tightened, and his fingers turned white. Karu answered, "Inarizaki won."

"I see... well, I'm sure it was a wonderful match." Their uncle kindly said. "Hishari, are you going to watch the finals tomorrow?"

She looked up. "Um, I was planning on it, yes."

Shinsuke glanced at her. "Ari-chan!"

"What? Takahiro said he'd come too. It's fine, isn't it?" Hishari asked tentatively. Shinsuke sighed. "It's fine, but why would you want to come? I don't even play!"

"It's not just the match. I want to meet HER too."

Hishari didn't specify who she was talking about, but Shinsuke and Takahiro instantly understood. Seiji, their uncle, looked from Hishari to Shinsuke. "'Her?' Shinsuke, you don't have a girlfriend, do you?"

"No! I don't!" Shinsuke pointedly looked at his sister, who stifled a smile. Himura pressed, "Is she pretty?"

"Y- no. I don't have one." He'd managed to stop himself, but his mistake hadn't gone unnoticed. No one asked again, but Takahiro and Karu secretly smiled. Takahiro whispered to his brother, "Shin-chan, why won't you tell them-"

"Takahiro. Eat." Shinsuke set his glass on the table with unnecessary force. Takahiro and Karu exchanged glances and hastily began a new conversation, and to his

After dinner, Shinsuke went outside, mostly so he could avoid talking to Karu.

It didn't work. He had been on the back porch for barely a minute when Karu sat down next to him. "Yo."

Shinsuke didn't answer and merely looked away. "How long are you gonna blame yourself for what happened? Like I told you- it's been two years since you've-"

"No matter what you say, it won't change the fact that you sacrificed your future for ME that day. Why would you do that?"

"You're an idiot. I saved BOTH of us that day. If we'd stayed there, both of us would've died. This way... we're both alive and I'm just injured." 

Shinsuke echoed, "'Just?' You can barely run! You- you wanted to continue with volleyball. You wanted to go play for Japan."

"I did it to save you, stupid. Now stop thinking it's your fault. I'll kick you if you avoid me next time I see you."

Shinsuke didn't answer, but a smile flickered across his face. "Yeah, okay."

"Anyways... I heard you guys have a new manager." Karu picked at the gravel. Shinsuke nodded. "She's the Miyas' sister. Isuma."

"Oh, is she the girl you like?" Karu asked, hiding a smile. Shinsuke glanced at him. "What?"

"You're really obvious. Just the way you said her name now. You must really like her."

"And so what if I do?" Karu smirked when he saw that his cousin suddenly looked uncomfortable. "Wow, Shin-chan. I've never seen you like a girl. Is she pretty?"

Shinsuke didn't answer and suddenly became very interested in the stars. Karu nodded in appreciation. "Ooh, she is. I'll come to tomorrow's match too! Then I can meet her!"

"Do whatever you want. I'm going back in." Shinsuke got to his feet and started to slide the door open when Karu tackled him from behind. "Hey!"

"It's just been a while since I've done this!" Karu laughed, pulling him inside. 

Forget Kita I wanna marry Karu. Also idk Hishari gives me Todoroki Fuyumi vibes. I even picture her to look like Fuyumi, but with no glasses and black streaks instead of red.

TYTY for 92K :>