Chapter 4

Elle/Sora

There! Right There!

Look at that tan, that tinted skin

Look at the killer shape he's in

Look at that slightly stubly chin

Oh Please he's gay, totally gay

"Oh...." Teruya soon realized what was going on. He quickly played along with the song.

Calahan/Nikei

I'm not about to celebrate

Every trait could indicate the totally straight expotriate.

This guy's not gay, I say not gay

All

That is the elephant in the room

Well, is it relevant to assume

that a man who wears perfume

is automatically matically fay?

Emmett/Yuki

But look at his coiffed and crispy locks

Elle/Sora

Look at his silk translucent socks

Calahan/Nikei

There's the eternal paradox

Look what we're seeing

Elle/Sora

What are we seeing?

Calahan/Nikei

Is he gay?

Elle/Sora

Of course he's gay

Calahan/Nikei

Or European?

In the silence, some of them snickered before continuing the song.

All

Ohhhhhh

Gay or European?

It's hard to guarantee

Is he gay or european?

Warner/Hajime

Well, hey don't look at me

Vivian/Emma

You see they bring their boys up different

in those charming foreign ports

They play peculiar sports

All

In shiny shirts and tiny shorts

Gay or foreign fella?

The answer could take weeks

They will say things like "ciao bella"

while they kiss you on both cheeks

Elle/Sora

Oh please

All

Gay or European?

So many shades of gray

Warner/Hajime

Depending on the time of day

The French go either way

All

Is he gay or European?

or-

Eden/Iroha

There! Right There!

Look at that condescending smirk

Seen it on every guy at work

That is a metro-hetro jerk

That guy's not gay, I say no way

All

That is the elephant in the room

Well is it relevant to presume

that a hottie in that costume

Elle/Sora

Is automatically, radically

Calahan/Nikei

Ironically, cronically

Vivian/Emma

Scurtinly, curtainly

Warner/Hajime

Genetically, netically

All

Gay!

Officially Gay!

Officially Gay, Gay, Gay, Gay!

On cue, Teruya decides to do something not gay as he gives Iroha a kiss on the cheek, which did surprise her. Some of them have to hold their laughter in to continue the song.

All

Dammit!

Gay or European?

Calahan/Nikei

So stylish and relaxed

All

Is he gay or European?

Calahan/Nikei

I think his chest is waxed

Vivian/Emma

But they bring their boys up different there

It's culturally diverse

It's not a fashion curse

All

If he wears a kilt or bears a purse

Gay or just exotic?

I still can't crack the code

Brooke/Kanade

Yet his accent is hypnotic

but his shoes are pointy-toed

All

Huh

Gay or European?

So many shades of gray

Judge/Hibiki

But if he turns out straight

I'm free at 8 on saturday

Teruya and Hibiki both gagged at that before continuing, which got more snickers from the group.

All

Is he gay or European?

Gay or european?

Gay or Euro-

Emmett/Yuki

Wait a minute!

Give me a chance to crack this guy

I have an idea I'd like to try

Calahan/Nikei

The floor is yours

Emmett/Yuki

So Mr. Ootori...

This alleged affair with Ms. Windam

has been going on for...?

Nicos/Teruya

2 years

Emmett/Yuki

And your first name again is...?

Nicos/Teruya

Teruya

Emmett/Yuki

And your boyfriend's name is...?

Nicos/Teruya

Mikado

Everyone dramatically gasps.

Nicos/Teruya

I'm sorry! I misunderstand

You say boyfriend

I thought you say best friend

Mikado is my best friend

Mikado cleared his throat as he got into character.

Carlos/Mikado

You bastard!

You lying bastard!

That's it

I no cover for you, no more!

Peoples

I have a big announcement

This man is gay and European!

you've got to stop your being

a completely closet case

No matter what he say

I sware he never ever ever swing the other way

You are so gay

You big parfait!

You flaming boy in cabaret

Nicos/Teruya

I'm straight!

Carlos/Mikado

You were not yesterday

So if I may, I'm proud to say

He's gay!

All

And European!

Carlos/Mikado

He's gay!

All

And European!

Carlos/Mikado

He's gay!

All

And European and Gay!

Nicos/Teruya

Fine okay I'm gay!

All

Hooray!

By the end of the song, they all broke out into laughter.

"Iroha that was amazing, I'm so glad you chose that!" Teruya smiled.

"Thanks! I knew it would fit perfectly!" Iroha smiled.

"Well anyone got any other songs recommendation?" Sora asked.

"I think we're all worn out from that song, so let's do something else" Yoruko suggested.

"Then let's move on to the next event, which is truth or dare! Nikei, grab Syobai!" Emma told him.

"Ugh fine," Nikei grumbled, grabbing Syobai from the corner who was on his third bottle and brought him over.