feral loki

FOR MY POOKIE @Riko_Shanghai

also just for context, Sae is here because Ego asked him to so cause Sae is good with Shidou (aplogies for the ass explanation, but i couldnt think of anything else)

Shidou has always been a menace, but today? He's a menace with a purpose.

Training winds down at PxG, sweat still clinging to jerseys, and the players scatter across the field — some stretching, some complaining, some dramatically claiming they're dying (Tokimitsu), and some pretending they don't care while totally caring (Karasu).

Shidou leans against the goalpost, smirk sharp and eyes laser-locked on Sae like a predator who legally shouldn't be allowed to flirt in public.

Sae, who totally does not care — except he definitely does because his ears are pink — tosses his water bottle at Shidou's chest.

"Stop staring. You're like a feral cat sizing prey."

"Nah," Shidou grins, uncapping the bottle and taking a sip, "cats don't kiss their prey this much."

"That's not—"

And Shidou does it. He yanks Sae's collar, steals a kiss right there on the turf like it's the most natural thing in the world.

It's soft at first — stupidly soft for them — but Sae tips forward like gravity stopped existing and suddenly they're kissing like they're alone.

Except they are absolutely not alone.

The field goes silent.

Then:

"...fluttering..." Nanase whispers emotionally, hands over his mouth like he's watching a wedding.

Zantetsu drops his stretching band. "Did— did they just—? Is this... a romantic idiom? Or— wait no, that's not right. Was that... correct kissing form?"

Charles lazily stretches, grin wide. "Bro just speed-ran romance. Absolute menaces. I respect it."

Karasu's eye twitches. "Of COURSE they'd do this here. In PUBLIC. You two have negative social awareness."

Tokimitsu's hands shake. "W-woah... I didn't know we were witnessing such a rare r-r-romantic— oh god, I'm gonna faint—"

And then—

Loki.

Tiny French coach, hands clasped behind his back, blinking like someone short-circuited his world-class football brain.

"Mon dieu."

Everyone freezes.

He takes a slow inhale.

"C'est... comment dire... un spectacle dramatique."

Then he raises his voice, deadpan and betrayed:

"WE ARE IN TRAINING, PAS À L'OPÉRA! What is this?? L'amour sauvage?? Save the passion pour APRÈS practice, s'il vous plaît!"

Charles is cackling. "Coach, you jealous because nobody kisses you like that?" he singsongs.

Loki jabs a finger at him. "Charles, shut your mouth before I make you run the entire pitch backwards en chaussettes. Barefoot. LIKE A GREMLIN."

Shidou just laughs, licking his lip obnoxiously like he just tasted the world's finest dessert.

Sae pulls back, expression flat but very obviously flustered.

"That was unnecessary."

"My bad," Shidou says, zero remorse, "forgot you get shy when people see you being soft."

"I don't get—"

"You do." Shidou taps his pinking ear. "Dead giveaway."

Nanase quietly melts on the sidelines like butter in July. "So cute..."

Tokimitsu nods shakily. "I-I think my heart grew three sizes..."

Karasu groans, covering his eyes like witnessing romance causes him physical pain.

"Can we PLEASE go back to training before someone writes fanfiction about us."

Shidou slings an arm around Sae's shoulders, tugging him close like he owns the air they breathe.

Sae doesn't shove him off.

(He does, however, mumble, "You're insufferable," in the softest tone ever heard from him.)

Shidou grins like he just won the World Cup. "And you're addicted. Lucky you."

Loki claps sharply, dramatic sigh.

"BACK TO WORK, LOVEBIRDS. If you want to kiss like you're in a French film, at least give me quality. Technique! Passion is nothing without FORM!"

Charles whispers, as dead serious as he's ever been: "...Coach just asked for better kissing technique."

"Silence." Loki rubs his temples. "I did not choose this life. Football chose me. Romance chaos followed uninvited like a stray cat. Why always me..."

Nanase, sparkling inside: "I'm... fluttering again."

Zantetsu nods sagely. "Love is like... brushing teeth after ramen. Pure. Correct? ...No? Is that— right?"

Karasu: "Someone please unplug him."

Sae sighs and walks off field, Shidou trailing smugly behind him like a disaster-golden retriever who just got a treat.

As they go, Shidou calls back:

"HEY LOKI — tell them to take notes. This is elite chemistry."

Loki screams in French.

"JE NE SUIS PAS TON CUPIDON, ESPÈCE DE DEMON BLOND!"

Charles collapses laughing. Tokimitsu claps for them like it's a wedding. Nanase cries happy countryside boy tears. Zantetsu debates idioms vs kissing physics. Karasu looks ready to throw himself into the nearest tactical strategy book.

And somewhere behind them, Shidou bumps Sae's shoulder.

"You liked it."

"Shut up."

Shidou, smug and sunshine-feral: "Say it."

Sae's voice is barely a whisper. "...Maybe."

Shidou beams like an idiot. "I'll take that."

(They walk away together. Everyone else gossips like middle schoolers.)

art credit: https://www.tumblr.com/karo0v/801290643883393024/inspired-by-a-mob-psycho-image