t h i r t e e n

We were still on a euphoric high by the time we got back to the suite, laughing and conversing freely.

But when we saw Padmé sitting on the couch in the living room, we quickly sobered up.

"Padmé, is everything alright?" I asked, getting her attention, she was wearing one of her many senate dresses.

Odd.

She turned to me smiling, "Oh, yes everything is fine, I just came to inform you that the meeting has been pushed to today, in about an hour actually."

"What? Why?" I questioned, genuinely confused on why they would change the date so suddenly.

"There's a major crisis in Alderaan, a neighboring planet wishes war, and the senators need to be there as soon as possible to negotiate peace." She explained.

"Oh ok, that certainly does make sense." I responded, looking at Anakin, "Just let me get changed and we can go."

I headed into my room and picked out the formal senate dress I had packed for the occasion.

They were usually large and flamboyant, as senate meetings were anything but casual and demanded the upmost respect.

I stepped out of my room when I had finished dressing, Anakin and Padme were sitting on opposite ends of the couch, looking separate ways.

Anakin was the first to see me, smiling as he looked at me.

The smile was sincere and reached his dazzling blue eyes.

I smiled back at him and realized Padme hadn't noticed my presence.

I cleared my throat, grabbing her attention.

She smiled brightly as well.

"Excellent, you look beautiful Verena. Shall we go?"

"Thank you Padme, you look lovely as well, and yes, I like to be early." I replied.

Anakin rolled his eyes playfully as I responded and smirked slightly as he stood from his seat on the couch.

He walked ahead of us and held the door.

"Thank you Anakin." Padme smiled at him as she walked past.

"Oh why thank you Anakin, I am so glad chivalry isn't dead." I thanked him sarcastically, smiling as I did so.

He bowed back in the same joking manner.

"Anything for you mi'lady." he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

I laughed lightly and walked through the doorway, waiting for him to catch up with Padme and I.

"So what is the basis of this secret meeting? And why the secrecy?" I asked Padme.

"The Seperatists" she sighed, "the Republic thinks they will start war, and if so, we need an army."

"It will all be okay in the end." I assured her, not forgetting the stress and fear she is experiencing.

"I hope so" she replied, not sounding hopeful.

I snuck a worried glance to Anakin, who was already looking at me.

My lips formed a smile when I realized he had been previously staring at me.

He didn't look away when I caught him, instead the intensity of his gaze increased slightly.

When I turned my attention back to what was in front of me, I realized we had just arrived at the meeting.

There were only two other senators and the Queen of Naboo present.

When everyone was seated, the Queen spoke.

"Thank you for coming on such short notice, it is deeply appreciated. Now, the topic at hand; the Seperatists and the possibility of a Republic Army." she said, opening the conversation.

"If the senate votes to create an army, I'm sure it's going to push us into a Civil War." I replied, looking at the Queen and the other senators.

"It's unthinkable, there hasn't been a full scale war since the formation of the Republic." the senator from Alderaan stated passionately.

The Queen looked to Padme, "Do you see any way through negotiations to bring the Seperatists back into the Republic?"

"Not of they feel threatened, my guess is they'll turn to the Trade Federations or the Commerce Guilds for help." she responded.

The Queen nodded, seeing truth in her words. It was obvious why she would trust Padme, as she was Queen of Naboo only years ago.

"It is outrageous, that after four trials in the Supreme Court Newt Gunray is still the Viceroy of the Trade Federation." the Queen looked to Padme as the senator from Alderaan continued talking, "I feel the senate is powerless to resolve this crisis." he finished solemnly.

"We must keep our faith in the Republic." she replied, still looking at Padme.

We all nodded at stood as the Queen rose.

Padme and I joined her side as she walked.

"The day we stop believing democracy can work, is the day we loose it." the Queen said, glancing at Padme and I.

"Let's pray that day never comes." Padme replied, sounding hopeful for once.

"In the meantime, we must consider your own safety." she stated, looking to me and then glancing at Anakin.

"What is your suggestion Master Jedi?" The senator from Alderaan asked Anakin.

"I plan on staying with Miss Leoet and protecting her until her assassin is captured while investigating who could be behind it all." Anakin answered respectfully.

The senator and Queen nodded, clearly pleased that my safety was in good hands.

I looked back to Anakin and smiled, he saw me and flashed one of his own.

"Perfect, it's settled then." the Queen smiled, looking to me.

I bowed lightly, thanking her for her consideration.

By the time Anakin and I got back from the meeting and an impromptu dinner at a local restaurant, the sun was disappearing behind the horizon, giving Naboo a radiant gleam.

The city was aglow as the sun gave out it's last minutes of warmth and light.

Anakin and I decided to view the sun setting from our balcony back in the suite.

I didn't know wether it was coincidental or planned, but the balcony faced the setting sun, giving us the perfect view of the soft pink and purple clouds balancing out the harsh orange sun.

It was extremely romantic.

The entire day in fact, seemed to be testing the tension between Anakin and I, teasing us to give in to our unreachable desires for a moment of passion.

But I feared that potential moment would be much too similar to the sunset we were watching.

Beautiful, but fleeting.

Warm and breathtaking during, but cold and dark after.

The sun disappeared, the moon taking its place in the sky, leaving a white cast on Anakin's face as I looked at him.

He turned to me, his blue eyes looking into my brown ones.

His gaze held so many emotions, love, happiness, devotion, and pain.

Pain?

"From the moment I met you, not a day has gone by where I don't think about us, how we could be together, how we could love each other." he confessed, "and whenever I'm near you, I'm in agony and the closer I am, the worse it gets." he added, inching himself closer to me.

I looked away from him, not believing that he was saying this. He knows the consequences, yet he shows no signs of stopping.

"I am haunted by the kisses you never should have given me, my heart is beating, hoping, that those kisses will not become a scar." he said, his voice shaking.

Part of me agreed with him and urged me to accept the love that I held for him.

But the other part warned me of the consequences and hardships we would face.

His eyes locked onto mine, his gaze intensifying.

"If you're suffering as much as I am, please tell me." he pleaded.

"Anakin, we can't, it's just not possible-" I looked to the ground unable to meet his gaze.

I wished with my entire being that I could say yes and be happy with him, but I feared what that moment of passion would bring.

He put his finger under my chin, bringing it up, so I was forced to stare into his eyes.

"Yes it is Verena, anything is possible, just listen to me." he begged.

"Why can't you see what I'm trying to say Anakin?" I replied, exasperated. "We can't do this, this can't happen, its too dangerous."

"Well did you stop to think that maybe I don't care how dangerous it is?" Anakin said while crossing his arms. "Maybe I don't care if I get expelled from the Jedi order."

"Well I do care!" I shouted, getting annoyed.

"That's not your decision to make!" He yelled back.

A glimmer of regret appeared in his blue eyes as he looked at my unamused face.

He sighed and uncrossed his arms, walking towards me so he could wrap his arms around my waist.

Looking me in the eyes he said, "The only thing I care about is you and right now, you're the only thing standing in the way of your own happiness and I intend to change that."

Noticing I wasn't going to reply, he began talking again, "You push people away because you believe its the right thing to do, you believe that you aren't losing anything from doing so. But you're wrong."

I looked at him with raised brows and a slight smile.

I was never wrong. 

He smiled too and finished his statement, "For once in your life, you're wrong. You're losing so much more than you think; experience, memories...love." He finished, moving his head dangerously close to mine.

His words resonated in my head and something clicked.

I'd been too busy helping others that I had forgotten to help myself.

I'd been so dedicated to being a public servant for those who elected me that I'd forgotten what it was like to be truly happy.

Being senator did make me happy, to an extent, but it wasn't the same feeling I get with Anakin.

I was a puppet, being pulled all different directions by people I didn't even know, I was forced to be emotionless so I could give the  citizens what they wanted. 

I'd been so focused on being an obedient servant that I had started to believe that was the only way to live life. 

Anakin attempted to pull me out of my ridiculous mind set and I pushed him away, chalking his actions up to him being an immature fool. 

But I  was the immature fool. 

And now I realize that.

I pulled myself out of my thoughts and leaned up to connect my lips with Anakin's.

I smiled into the kiss, hoping, knowing, everything was going to be alright and that I was truly happy. 

Anakin pulled away from the kiss, leaving me confused.

"Did I just prove you wrong?" He asked while smirking.

"Shut up" I said, laughing, moving to kiss him again.