Chapter 5

"This looks about right." You said with your tongue sticking out as pure concentration. The android sitting in front of you were very quiet but nodded, as you put in the last screw for the arm to get back into place. You had to make a run at the junkyard again later, as you were running out of small bits for bigger injuries. Maybe James would go with you for once. You had told him about the still living androids lying around without mentioning Markus. James then went on and on about how they weren't really alive and how they couldn't really die either. It was something that you fighting over a lot lately and he wouldn't understand your viewpoints. That was also the reason that you kept your work from him. He was your best friend but you were afraid that he would tell on you and get you arrested for good.

"Thank you. I owe you a favour once we get our freedom." The female android said as she moved her arm around to see if it was fully functional.

"You really don't have to. It's my pleasure to be able to help you. I like your optimism by the way. It's very enlightening." You signalled her to get down from the table.

"Don't you believe in our freedom?" She asked sounding a little sad. You started cleaning the table from the blue blood that had spilled from the arm when she came. You had clean the stairs too before you left with her.

"I do and I hope you'll get it soon. But I am afraid that much more people have to be convinced before anything can happen. But I like the approach they have at Jericho. Markus did an amazing speech."

"Markus is the leader in Jericho, right? Do you know him?" She asked more lively as they mention of Jericho made her happy.

"I know him but I don't know if he's their leader or just the face of the revolution. He was the deviant I took care of here, actually. I am going to drive you to the same place I dropped him off. I know you will find a way to get to Jericho from there." You said as you moved the cleaning to the stairs. The female android looked embarrassed but you assured her that she wasn't the first one to bleed on your stairs and definitely not the last one.

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"A trip to the junkyard? Why on earth would I be interested in that?" James said while almost chocking on his coffee the next morning.

"Because you are such a great friend and it is kind of your fault that I need to get all those spare parts to androids." Guilt tripping at its finest. It always seems to work.

"I don't know, man. It just not my style to mess around in garbage. No offence." He said holding up a hand in defence.

"All the offence taken, James. You have to do this with me. And it's not garbage if it's still useful." You pointed out.

"What if I say I have this really hot date tonight and I might get lucky?" He tried but you shook your head at him and took his coffee from him. He didn't protest because you used to do it all the time. Sometimes he actually had two cups at his desk because he knew you would stealing it all the time.

"Well then you definitely have to go with me. I like my friends as pure as possible." You teased which made him frown.

"I am not a virgin!" He said frustrated throwing around with his hands.

"I never said that. But we need to go to the junkyard today! After work. And you love me so you are going with me." You sipped his coffee and was on your way back to your own desk.

"I am not a virgin." He mumbled angrily behind you and you tried your best to contain yourself and not burst out in laugher.

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"This is seriously disgusting. Why did you feed me right before we got here? I want to throw it all up again." James said as you both jumped the fence to the junkyard that you once found Markus at. You had been here many times since but never found an android as intact as Markus. But you could still see the blinking lights of fading LED's around. It was like blood red stars in the dark.

"It was good and healthy food and it took me a long time to make, so don't you dare throw it up again! Besides, we had to do something until it was dark enough to get in here unnoticed." You explained and swung around with your flashlight to find one of the few trails that was around the place.

"Oh god what is that?" He said as a very loud noise went off next to the trail. He ran up behind you and grasped the strap of your backpack. You didn't know if you should tell him that it actually was; the last desperate scream of a dying android lying somewhere in the pile. It may have heard you two talk and was trying to call for you but all that came out was a loud static noise where you couldn't tell the words apart. If it even were words anymore.

"I think it was an android." You said honestly.

"What? Are there any androids here? Aren't they going to stop us breaking in?" He questioned and looked around like the android would come walking around the next corner.

"Have you looked around you at all? Almost everything you see in these piles are androids or android parts. They don't automatically shut down as they get thrown away. They lay here for weeks before they run out of blue blood to keep their system going. It's kind of like when a human gets shot and you just leave them to bleed out." You explained and casted the light at a nearby android which eyes were looking furiously at you. Most of its body was gone and even its jaw so it couldn't talk if it wanted to. James really looked like he could throw up now. It was not just talk.

"Why do you compare it with humans bleeding? It just makes it so much worse to be here." He said and actually gaged but fought it with a hand over his mouth.

"Why wouldn't I? They are talking about deviants in the news all the time. Androids that start to feel like us humans. But what do we do? We throw them out here and make them suffer. Because many of these androids you see here are deviants. Not just a broken machine. They feel the pain of lying here. They feel the sadness of their owners throwing them away because of how they feel. And in the end they are scared because they know they are going to die here and nobody cares about them anymore." You were almost shouting in the end as you tried to get your point out for James to understand.

You just stood there kind of shocked by yourself. You had never been passionate about anything. You had thinks you were good at and things that your parents wanted you to do. But you never really found your own thing that could light a fire in you. Until now. Right at that moment when James was standing looking at you with wide eyes and open month, you realized that fighting for the cause of another species right to live might be something that could be your thing. It was something you believe in but had done it in silence while other people just stood there and watch all the innocent androids get thrown away.

"I... I never really thought about that." James finally said as he looked around like he just realized where he was.

"No because you never had to. But I am met with deviants almost every day, James. They come running to my house to get help. I'm not actually repairing people's android maids. I am helping actually people. They are hurt by their previous owners or people on the streets that sees them as a thread. But all they want to do is live! They want to feel loved and wanted!" You explained and you didn't know if it was a good idea to tell James this, as you didn't know his opinion about the deviants yet, but it felt good to tell someone what you did and how proud you were about it. James stood there in silence and looked at you for some time. But it was him that should talk now, not you. After a moment he sighed.

"I don't know y/n. I don't know how to feel about all this. I would do a lot of things for you but..." He hesitated. While the silence fell over you again another scream from a dying android tore through the darkness. It was very clear that James didn't like to be there. You didn't like it much either but you had to find the spare parts to continue your work.

"Go home James. I don't you here if you don't want to help me. This is what I do and nothing can stop me helping the deviants." You said and you started to leave James and continue the search for the spare parts as he grabbed your arm.

"y/n. Are you sure about all of this?" He asked you seriously and stared your down.

"yes." Was all you could say. It was that simple.

"I don't think I can help you. This is not my cause. But if you continue with what you do, I will look the other way. I will not tell on you." He said and let go of your arm and backed away.

"That is all I'm asking." You said and nodded. You saw him leave the same way you came over the fence and you stood there until the beam from his flashlight was out of sighed.

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You didn't even get a moment for yourself when you got home from work the day after. Hiding behind a bush in your front garden was a male android model PL600. He was sat on the grass with his arms around his legs and was rocking back and forth. You sat down on your knees to put a calming hand on his back.

"You are safe now. Come with me inside so we can get you fixed up." He looked up at your face to read your expression so you made sure to give him a warm smile even though you were exhausted from the night before you spend on the junkyard. You reached out your hand for him to take and you could feel how much he was shaking. He must have experienced something horrible before coming to you. You hurried inside with him and sat him down on the couch. You would make yourself a cup of tea to keep yourself awake for another night of work. You took your cup and was about to show the android to the stairs as someone knocked on the door. You froze in your steeps and the android flinched. You had a lot of androids coming but never two at the same time. Or was it even an android? What if James didn't keep his promise and told someone? You almost threw your cup of tea on the sofa table and it spilled everywhere. You took the android and puffed his back.

"Out of the back door. Hide somewhere in the backyard. I have a few big bushes out there you can stay in. I will come and get you when it is safe." You explained and locked the door after the android had agreed to the plan with a simple nod. You calmed yourself and walked over to the front door. The person outside had only knocked that one time even though it took you some time to get the android outside again. You opened the door to revile Connor standing there. It was like he didn't even notice that you had finally opened the door.

"Oh hey Connor! Is it already time for an inspection?" You said smiling and tried to relax a little from the sudden outburst of activity. Connor still didn't react to the fact that you had opened the door. Was he scanning something? Had he noticed anything?

"Are you okay?" You asked him and tried to catch his eyes by moving your head in his line of sigh. It seemed like it shock him awake and he gave you a small smile.

"Sorry I was... deep in thoughts. I think... How are you miss y/l/n?" The first part of that sentence was full of life but as you had experienced before it was like a switch was turned on and off and the last part of the sentence came out very mechanic.

"You don't seem alright, Connor. Do you want to come in?" You ignored his question towards you and let him inside. He automatically sat down in the couch and you fetched a towel to clean up the tea you had spilled.

"Was this my fault?" He asked and gestured to the tea. He actually frowned. You finally sat down next to him, looking at him curiously. If he was following his programming he would have asked you about the basement by now. He would scan the furniture. Something was changed in him.

"No I was just clumsy. But Connor you seem a little... off? You know you can talk to me, right? I understand more than you think." You said and laid a hand on his. It came as a surprise when he turned his hand around and took a hold of yours. His hand was the perfect human temperature; not cold as the metal that was inside him. He was exactly like a human down to the texture of his skin. He was an amazing piece of work.

"Is that because you were on your way to become the next android genius before you left university?" He asked and looked are you with confused eyes. Not confused about what you said, but he just seemed so... lost.

"I'm not an android genius. I just know a thing or two about androids like you and how you work in there." You said and pointed at his chest with your free hand. It was a risk when you talked about him being deviant, but you had to figure out how far he was into the changing process. You had noticed that it happened easier and faster with some of the simpler and older models. But a model like Connor was a prototype and a whole other level of android than any of those bought by normal people.

"Like me?" Connor asked and his LED suddenly went bright yellow. You were thinking about telling him about the Deviants that you were helping but it was risky. You knew he was changing but he was also fighting it himself. You could almost imagine the turning of cogwheel inside his head. You could tell him a part of the truth without actually reviling what actually was going on in your basement.

"Let me tell you a thing. I... met a deviant. I met him at a junkyard where I was searching for spare parts for the androids I repair. He was badly damaged and he was very afraid. He ended up there in the junkyard because of how he was feeling. And it is not wrong to feel but people make you think that." You were talking about Markus without actually telling on him. Connor was still a deviant hunter after all.

"What happened to him?" Connor asked silently and looked at you. It looked like he was reading you. Not in the analysing robotic way, but more human.

"He died." You lied and looked down at your still intertwined hands. You couldn't look at him while lying but it was better that way. He couldn't know. Not yet.

"You mean... He shut down." Connor corrected you but you shook you head.

"No he died. He was so much more than a machine and I feel like you are too." You squeezed his hand and his LED turned red at the action. He looked at you with wide eyes and threw your hand away from his like it had burned him.

"Are you suggestion that I am a deviant? Because I can't..." He silenced.

"That was not what I was saying. But it wouldn't matter to me anyway. Connor, you are amazing because you are you. So if it is your programming or something, it doesn't matter. I like talking to you and I find you interesting. And you should know that you can talk to me about anything. I would never tell a soul." You assured him. You felt that it would be good for him to open up. You could feel that he had a lot on his mind and you wouldn't mind being the one to listen.

".... You make me so confused, miss y/l/n." he said as he relaxed a little after what you said. His LED returned to yellow again.

"Just call me y/n." He asked of him and he nodded with a small smile.

"Can I... can I hold your hand again?" He asked a little unsure, you could tell. You giggled a little and reached out your hand for him to take. He hesitated but you didn't move your hand. It needed to happen in his pace. But he scooted closer to you this time and took it in the end. He grabbed your hand between his, like he was warming it up.

"Does it feel good?" You ask him but he wasn't looking at you. He kept looking at your hand again. His leg was resting against yours now and you felt your skin burn where you were connected. Connor made you feel so comfortable because it wasn't like he was trying anything like other men would have done, if you were sitting this close and touching like this. You sat in silent for a moment until he closed his eyes and sighed. Androids sighed? No, Deviants did.

"I witnessed a deviant shoot himself the other night. I felt... terrified." He started and you almost gasped at how he started to open up. You suddenly felt all warm inside.

"What happened, Connor?"

"I was on a case in the Stratford Tower. Some deviants had broken in and had used the studio to broadcast their... opinions." You tried your best to stay calm, but you immediately thought about Markus. Was he dead? Was he the one that shot himself? You knew he was very passionate about the deviant's freedom and he wouldn't let anyone use his information to find and harm his people. You hoped that Markus was safe even though it was bad to wish that someone else died instead.

"I saw that in the news. You were there?"

"Yeah. Right after I happened. We found one of the deviants on the roof. He was already hurt and we were going to use his memory to figure out where all the deviants hide. But as I was looking through his memories... I was felling everything that he had felt before... and when he shot himself. It felt like I died with him. I was in his head and I could feel how scared he was of dying. So I felt scared too." Connor didn't even notice how he now was calling it dying now instead of shutting down. But he was shaking by now and stared out in the room. It was horrible to look at. You could almost feel how he was rewatching the scene in his memory cards. He shook his head and let go of your hand. He leaned forward and placed his head in his hands. He was so scared and confused.

"Come here." You reached out your arms and laid them around him before he could say or do anything. He rested your head on his shoulder as you sat there awkwardly and waited for him to relax again. He ended up kind of falling into you and without hesitation this time, he let his arms wrap around your waist as he leaned into your embrace. His blazer jacket got some wrinkles but you treasured this moment and you hoped he did too.

After a while with his forehead resting against your shoulder he started to tell you about all the other thinks that had made him insecure in his work as a deviant hunter. How de let a deviant run away to save his partner Hank, how he cared for Hanks dog without knowing why and how he couldn't shoot some Traci's outside a brothel. He told you have they told him they were in love and they ran away holding hands. How Hank had told him it was the right thing to do even though it felt so wrong in the moment.

"I don't know what is happening to me." He mumbled against your shoulder in the end. You rested your cheek on the top of his head.

"I do." You simply said and smiled. You were about to speak again when someone suddenly bust in your front door. You both sat up straight in shock as James ran across the room with plastic bags in both hands. He didn't even look in your direction because he was too busy reaching in the kitchen with whatever he had in his hands.

"Hot hot hot hot hot hot hot" He mumbled while running and threw the bags on your dining table.

"Sorry about that but it's Chinese! I came directly here after ordering it so it's crazy hot." James said as he shook his hands to cool them down. He finally looked your way and he sent Connor a kind of mean expression.

"What is he doing here?" He said very impolitely and actually pointed at Connor like he was an object and not a person. You scowled at him but he didn't seem to care.

"We were talking."

"Inspection." You and Connor talking at the same time. You turned your head towards him as he lied to James. This was so much more than an inspection? You knew it may be too much for him to show his deviancy. Or maybe he wasn't even aware that that was what it was yet.

"Ermh okay." James said with an empty expression and was just standing there. He was still wearing his work clothes and he look as stylish as Connor, if not more.

"I have to go. Hank has called me to the station." Connor suddenly said and stood up in haste.

"He did?" You asked sadly. You really didn't want him to leave.

"Actually... He did. Half an hour ago." The last few words came out as a mumble so James couldn't hear it. It meant that even though they called for him at his work, he stayed with you. You could feel your cheeks burn a little as you watched Connor smooth out the wrinkles on his sleeves and correct his tie.

"I will... See you again miss... I mean y/n." Connor said and smiled at you and left your house faster than a rocket. You guessed that he didn't like James much but it seemed like the feeling was requited.

"So... Did he find any deviant here on his so called inspection?" James said with a sour expression.

"What you suggest... SHIT!" You suddenly thought about the deviant out in your garden and stormed out in the backyard to find him in one of the bushes you told him to stay at.

"Are you okay?" You asked embarrassed that you actually forgot all about him because of Connor. The android nodded and went inside with you.

"Oh. Come on. How many androids do you hide around here?" James said dramatically. You turned to the android that looked terrified at James.

"He's just my asshole friend. Don't mind him." You said and went into the basement.