Mad World

"Hide my head, I want to drown my sorrowNo tomorrow, no tomorrow"  ~Mad World - Gary Jules

January 1960

2 weeks had gone by since Christmas. School had started again.Jenny sat staring out the window of her maths classroom."Jennifer!" the teacher yelled causing Jenny to jump. "Please pay attention!"Jenny did as she was told, for a moment before getting lost in her thoughts again.

"Have you heard from her at all?" Claudia asked as she and Jenny stood in the busy school hallways between classes. She shook her head."Paul said what he saw on boxing day was horrible," Jenny said sadly "poor lad was in tears when he tol' me and mum about it""Have you tried going to her house?" Claudia asked. She had only learned how bad Charli's home life was just before Christmas, as the leader of the teddy girls, she showed more concern than most would expect of her, however, she felt a need to take care of her group of friends despite her tough persona.

"They've boarded up the bloody windows," Jenny said, "Her parents are bloody insane...honestly, Claudia..what if?"

Jenny feared the worst as tears welled in her eyes."Shh..don't think like that" Claudia said "We're going over today. After school...and we're not leaving until we see her""Excuse me," a timid voice interrupted. Claudia looked up from her conversation with Jenny, her brow furrowed, anger was written all over her face.

"The fuck do you want?" she said as Jenny turned to see who it was."I just wanted to talk with Jennifer," Sally said finally.

"I don't want to talk to you," Jenny said turning her back on Sally."I know you hate me, but I was wondering if you've seen Charlotte," Sally said nervously. Jenny turned back to her.

"She hasn't been to church lately.." Sally continued. Jenny wanted to hurt Sally and Claudia was ready for a fight.

"I haven't seen her...no one has...not since Christmas," Jenny said coolly.

Sally looked at her feet, not sure what to say.

"I didn't mean to get her in so much trouble..." she said finally without looking up.  She couldn't bring herself to look at Jenny and Claudia.

"Trouble??" Jenny said angrily "Do you have any idea what her parents do to her?? For all I know, she could be dead by now!!"

She stormed out of the school, Claudia paused a moment to see Sally hiding tears.

"Tell her I'm sorry.." Sally said finally.

"Sorry isn't going to cover it," Claudia said angrily before running after Jenny.

"Jen!" Claudia called "Where are you going?"

"I'm finding out what's going on right now," Jenny said angrily "I'm going to her house"

"I'm coming with you!" Claudia said as she caught up "Ya' need the support luv"

Jenny smiled weakly in agreement.

Soon, they arrived at the McLeod house. Claudia stepped back in shock. The windows were closed, Mr. McLeod had boarded them from the outside as well. They saw the family car parked outside.

"I know they're home...Paul and I walked by the other night and could see lights on under the doorway..." Jenny said angrily.She began pounding on the door as hard as she could.

"I know you're home!" She screamed, "I just want to see my best friend!"

She kept pounding the door. She pounded the door so hard her hands were bruised.

"Jen," Claudia said putting her hands on Jenny's shoulders "They're not going to answer"

Jenny slumped onto the front step as tears fell from her eyes.

Suddenly the door opened, they both jumped only to see Mr. McLeod standing in the doorway.

"Jennifer, shouldn't you be in school?" He asked with his arms crossed.

"Shouldn't Charli be in school?" she said angrily. She had no fear of him anymore.

"We're taking care of her schooling for the time being," he said sternly.

"Then let us see her!" Jenny said not backing down.

"Come now dear," Mrs. McLeod said from the kitchen "You might as well let her say goodbye to her friends before we go."

Mr. McLeod grunted his disapproval, but let Jenny and Claudia inside the house. 

The house was unrecognizable, moving boxes sat everywhere, almost everything from the house had disappeared into the boxes. Jenny's heart sank."She's in her room," he said. Both Jenny and Claudia made their way up the dark stairway.

Charli sat on her bed, she tried to draw but had difficulty due to the sling her arm was in. She swore angrily as she ripped another sketch from the sketchpad with her good arm and threw it on the floor. She looked like she hadn't slept in weeks, her hair was a mess, her face was red with anger and tears. She heard a knock on her door.

"You already packed everything, leave me alone" she yelled."Charli," a voice she hadn't heard since Christmas came "It's me"

Jenny opened the door slowly as she and Claudia stepped inside. Charli's attitude changed immediately, tears filled her eyes.

"Jenny!" she said jumping off the bed "I never thought I'd see you again"

Jenny looked around the room as she hugged Charli, the room was bare except for her bed and various papers thrown around the room, a small raccoon sat on her pillow. She pulled away from Charli and got a look at her friend. She'd never seen Charli look so terrible, her eyes looked tired, bruises still covered most of her face. She was healing, but there were still varying shades of yellows, greens, and purples. None more prevalent than a large purple and blue bruise at her eye and on her nose. Her lip was scabbed where it had been split and left arm hung in a sling."God, Charli...I'm so sorry...Paul told me everything" she said sadly. Claudia had been quiet, she was in shock at everything she'd seen as they entered the house.

Charli cried again.

"I miss him so much, Jen..." she said suddenly "Da' is making us move...says its too sinful here...""Where are you moving?" Claudia asked finally. Charli shook her head."I'm not supposed ta' say....I don't want ta' go...its far..." she rambled on. Jenny hugged her again as she sobbed.

"You could stay with us!" Jenny said suddenly "Mum loves ya' and yer brilliant with Simon"

"I've already thought of that," Charli said sadly "Ya' know my da' would be after yer mum...and you...he's gone completely mad..."

"When do you leave?" Jenny asked sadly.

"End of the week..."Charli said wiping more tears away "Honestly Jen, I'd rather be dead...I can't keep living with them.."

"Don't say that!" Jenny said hugging her again "I'll write you! And I know you, you'll find a way back"

"Already planning it...I turn 18 next year..." Charli laughed through a sob."Do ya' want me to tell Paul anything?" Jenny asked. Charli nodded.

"They're letting me go for one last walk along the pier...tonight." she said finally "Tell him...tell him, to meet me there at 7 if he wants ta' see me"

Her parents had agreed to let her have a last walk along the pier, Charli hadn't expected she would see any of her friends before they left, she had only hoped for a few moments alone at the pier, or if she was lucky, some of her friends would be for a walk despite the cold as well.

Jenny nodded. She hugged Charli one last time and cried."You write to me when you've moved, I'll write back. Promise. And I'm going to write about you," Jenny said trying to regain herself.

"You alright luv?" Jenny asked Claudia as they walked away from the McLeod house.

"I just...I know her parents were crazed, I've never seen anyone hurt like that.." Claudia said finally.

"That's the worst I've ever seen her...I'm scared they're taking her away," Jenny said.

They were silent awhile as they walked the streets of Liverpool."I thought we were going to see Paul," Claudia said noticing they were walking towards Woolton.

"We are.." Jenny said "He's been spending most of his afternoons at John's. I think music is distracting him a bit from everything"

"Ladies! What can I do for you" John said as he answered the door."Hi John, is Paul around?" Jenny asked plainly. John's eyebrows furrowed annoyed.

"Jesus, even when girls come to me house they're looking for Paulie," He said angrily.

"John, it's important," Jenny said impatiently "It's about Charli"

John frowned a bit before he could say anything they heard Paul leap from the couch in the front room.

"What about Charli?" Paul said as he hurried to the door."Hey Paulie," Jenny smiled weakly "I saw her today, finally.""And??" he said impatiently "Is she alright?"Jenny's smile left her face.  She saw the worry in Paul's eyes and nearly began to cry seeing how upset he was."She'll be at the pier tonight," Jenny said finally "If you want to see her before she goes, be there at 7 pm""Goes?" Paul said anxiously "What do you mean, Jen?"

Jenny shook her head trying to prevent herself from crying.

"She's fine Paul, but if you want to see her...be at the pier at 7," she said, "I really should be going, mum needs me to watch Simon this afternoon."

After a small argument with her parents over going alone to the pier, they finally caved.  It was one of the only times they caved to her.Charli stood alone at the pier. Her large winter coat hid her arm in its sling away and kept the cold slightly at bay. She managed to light a cigarette for herself and stood, smoking and staring out over the pier, realising it would be the last time she'd see the view of the harbour she loved so much.

"Alright miss?" an elderly man asked as he and his dog walked by, the small dog jumped up on Charli's leg, eagerly looking for attention, she smiled weakly and scratched the little dog's ears.

"I'm alright, just waiting for someone," she said trying not to show her face. He caught a glimpse of Charli's face, seeing a bruised eye and a cut on her lip. she didn't look like she wanted to discuss it, and he wasn't one to pry.

"You know, I've lived all 64 years of my life in this rainy little city...but I'll never leave, can't get a view like that anywhere else in the world" he smiled.

"No, I suppose not," Charli said with a sad smile.

"Have a good night, luv" he said before walking away.

Charli waited a few more moments before thoughts of doubt crept into her mind. She sat on a small bench trying to drown them out.

"What if he doesn't come?.....he probably won't....da' probably threatened him...'sides it doesn't matter..."

"Hey Charli," she heard Paul's familiar voice softly say just before she'd given up all hope. He sat next to her."You came," she smiled at him."Of course I did," he said putting his arms around her. She quietly cried into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry I look so terrible..." she said pulling away slightly."Charli luv, I don't care," he said stroking her cheek"As long as you're ok"

She shrugged as best she could. Paul noticed one arm hidden in her coat."Is your arm ok?" he asked.She opened the coat to reveal the sling."Dislocated shoulder..." she said not even facing him "believe me when I say, when they popped it back in place, that was the worst pain I've ever felt...still don't know if it's going to heal right. Doctor seemed concerned""I'm so sorry luv," he said sadly as he pulled her close. They were silent awhile.

"Paul," she said finally "My parents...they're making us move. Da' has a new job lined up...and...I can't do anything...""What??" Paul said surprised "Where? Where are they taking you? I'll find you, Charli."She shook her head."I can't say...I don't want to....it's really far away...but I'll find a way back, once I turn 18..." she said as tears fell."They can't do this!" He said standing up angrily. "They can't just take you away from everything!""Paul, what am I supposed to do?" she said upset "I don't have any say anymore....maybe they're right, maybe I am just...bad...maybe I should listen to them...I wouldn't have ended up like this if I listened..."

"No! Don't say that.." Paul said as he sat back down. He ran a hand through her hair "It's their fault this happened...not yours...they did this to you, you're fine as yourself, never let anyone make you believe otherwise!"

She cried into his shoulder again. When she looked up at him again, he kissed her softly."We keep talking about finding our own place someday," she said as she broke away "Let's just do it. Let's just leave together, tonight. Just me and you."

Paul smiled a moment at the thought, then thoughts of his family, the band, his friends brought him to reality. He hung his head sadly."I can't...." he said quietly."What do you mean?" Charli said anxiously "We could just leave, my aunty Mandy would take us...we could write to everyone once we're safe...it..it.."

Part of her knew she was being ridiculous, another part of her was desperate."You promised, you would get me away from all this," she said in almost a whisper as she hung her head. Paul lifted her face gently."I know...and...I will" he said "Someday...I just can't leave...I mean...my da', he'd be upset...and the band...I'm sorry luv.."

There were tears in his eyes as he saw the heartache in her eyes.

Charli sighed."No...I suppose you're right..." she said finally "I'm just afraid, this is the end...that I'll never see you again""I'll find you," Paul said, "I don't know how yet, but I will."

She looked into the soft, hazel eyes she'd grown to love fearing it would be the last time she would see them.

"I promise Charli," he said, sensing her fear "We'll be together again, I love you""I love you too" she said fighting back tears as he held her close.

"Tea dear?" the stewardess asked shaking Charli from her thoughts."What?" she said shaking her head "Oh..um...no, I'm fine. Ta"The stewardess moved on."Cheer up luv," Mrs. McLeod said brightly as Charli held Rocky closer with one arm "You'll see, our new home will be much better""Right..." Charli said absentmindedly as she looked out the window of the plane at the vast ocean, already she was further from her home in Liverpool than she could have imagined or ever wanted to. Already, she felt like she would be forgotten.

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A/N: I don't have a lot to say on this one, the next chapter is slightly lighter is all I can say for now.  Thanks as always for reading, commenting and voting!  I will return the favour as best I can.  Cheers :)

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