Chapter 32 - Losing Her

You finally broke from the kiss and stared into Bakugou's crimson eyes. Your heartbeat was racing, and you were nearly panting.

"You are a pain. You're the most infuriating person I've ever met."

Really!? Those are the first words out of your mouth after you kiss me?

You started to pull away, but he held onto your waist. "You're a fucking tease. You drive me absolutely crazy every day with your optimism and your drive and the fact that you're just goddamn better than me at certain things." He ran a gentle hand down the side of your face, cupping your chin. You furrowed your brows at the mixed messages. "But those are all things I also like about you."

You allowed yourself to relax in his touch. "You like that I drive you nuts?" you said finally, a hint of flirtation in your tone. You blinked your eyes innocently up at him.

"Don't give me that fucking look." He released your chin and pulled his other hand from your waist, crossing his arms in front of his chest, a blush rising to his cheeks. Your body suddenly felt so cold without his touch.

"Will you come down and have lunch with the most infuriating person you know?"

"No." Your heart sank.

"But I thought..."

"I'll meet you back in class. I just have some work I need to finish up here." He held up a notebook. He sounded genuinely sorry to not join you.

"Alright then. We should talk," you said with a half-smile. He hummed and you leaned in to plant a single peck on his cheek. As you rose from the ground Bakugou countered.

"At least give me a real kiss if you're gonna pull that crap," he huffed in embarrassment as color flooded his face once again. You knelt and brushed a quick kiss along his lips, not trusting yourself to pull away again. You turned and headed back to the exit before opening the metal door to the stairwell.

Once inside, you pressed your back against the cool cinderblock wall and exhaled, a giant smile plastered on your face. "It wasn't all in my head." You breathed out a sigh and closed your eyes, reliving the kiss in your mind.

***

Your afternoon training with Todoroki and Aizawa was hard to focus through. While you were able to ignite your admittedly weak fire, your mind kept drifting to thoughts of Bakugou's lips, his hands, the sweet caramel scent of his skin.

Todoroki cocooned you in ice, rapidly dousing your flames and your daydream.

"Focus [l/n]," Aizawa growled through his teeth. "It wastes everyone's time if you don't concentrate." You hardened your gaze and felt the ice begin to melt along your arms. You punched through, only to have your forearm shoot back against the pillar, newly covered with a layer of white.

You puckered your lips, annoyed you hadn't anticipated a countermeasure. Now that you could call forth the flames, Todoroki didn't have to go so easy on you. You broke through once more and even managed to wrench a leg free, yet another wave of ice washed over you.

"Oh, come on!" you protested. You were getting tired. The flames took a lot more energy to conjure and your arms, while cool from the ice, were becoming more raw from the continued ignition. You tried to call the flames forward once more, but nothing sparked. You'd tapped out your reserves. The familiar sensation of shivers coursed through your body.

"Enough." Todoroki released you at Aizawa's command. You kicked the remaining ice from around your boot. "Tomorrow we'll add in more hand-to-hand in conjunction with your quirk training." You both nodded at your teacher before he turned and walked out of the gym.

***

Knock. Knock. Music played from behind the door. The pounding drums suggested metal or rock.

Knock. Knock. "FUCK OFF!" You heard Bakugou's harsh voice and rolled your eyes.

"It's me." You tapped at the door one more time. A moment later you heard the lock pop. After your session with Aizawa you'd hurried back to the dorms, (Todoroki had seemed surprised at your energy level after just having been encased in ice) eager to talk more with Bakugou. Your kiss hadn't exactly answered your lingering questions.

You hadn't bothered to braid your hair. Mina was right; it looked better down, and you suddenly felt the urge to look nicer.

"Hey there." You grinned as he cracked open the door.

"Get in here." He grabbed your wrist and practically wrenched you through the door before closing it forcefully behind you. You took a deep breath, breathing in the scent of his room. It felt like forever since you'd been in here. "Why are you so cold?" He let go of your wrist.

"I was training with Shouto," you answered, smiling as you spotted your black and green ashtray still on his dresser.

"That asshole, I'll kill him. Your skin's like ice." He started to push past you. Not knowing how to stop him you simply raised to your toes and placed a quick kiss to the tip of his nose. His eyes went wide at your sudden affection and he took a step back. "What the fuck was that?"

"What was what?" You pecked his nose again, this time wickedly smirking as you pulled away.

"You can't just fucking do that!" He was getting more and more flustered.

"Why not?" you teased, tapping your index finger against the same spot you'd kissed. He pulled away and dropped onto the bed.

"Because I have a reputation," he huffed with no conviction.

"It's just the two of us here." You sat down beside him with a giggle and poked him in the ribs, a spot you knew from your many sparring sessions was ticklish.

"You know what? Fuck you. Fuck your pretty face and your shiny [h/c] hair. Fuck your adorable laugh."

"You know, I don't think I've ever been complimented and insulted at the same time quite like that." You smiled up at him. It felt so good to be close to him again, to tease him.

"And fuck your smile," he added for good measure. You chuckled again and shifted nearer to him on the bed. You laid your head on his shoulder. "You're still freezing," he said after a long moment.

"Then hug me dammit!" you playfully sulked.

"I don't cuddle Ashtray," he said and threw a blanket over your head.

"Hey!" you called out as you popped your head up through the fabric. It smells like him. Your hair fell in front of your eyes and you pouted. Bakugou smirked at you wrapped in his camo blanket.

"Bakugou?" The boy hummed at your earnest tone. "Why didn't you talk to me for days?" His smirk dropped, and he was silent for a long time.

"I guess I didn't know what to say to you. I thought you were dating Shitty Hair behind my back and it set me off. And then you got paired with fucking IcyHot... who also likes you by the way, in case you're too dense to recognize that." You shot him a small scowl. "I know I have a shit temper, but some of the things I said to you were meaner than I even intended. And I didn't know how to take them back. I thought you wouldn't forgive me."

"You're an idiot," you finally said after taking in his answer. He started to rip away the blanket and opened his mouth to argue. Instead, you pressed your lips to his, shutting down his protest. You felt the same desire and need you had on the roof. Even as the blanket fell from your shoulders, you felt nothing but warmth. You weren't sure if you would ever get used to the sensation of Bakugou's hands in your hair, his mouth against your own, a faint nibble on your lower lip.

"Bakugou," you gasped as you broke the kiss.

"Are you really still calling me that?" He smirked at your flushed cheeks. You could see his canine seductively poking through his parted lips. Your pulse quickened.

"Katsuki?" you whispered.

"Say it again." You could almost hear a purr in his voice instead of his usual growl. He moved in closer, closing the gap between your lips once more. You cocked your head to the side and brought your mouth to his ear. His body stiffened. You liked having this kind of power over the explosive boy.

"No," you breathed and pulled away biting your lip, a mischievous twinkle in your eye. "I think I'll just go." You winked, rose from the bed, and walked to the door.

"Wait, what the fuck?!" Bakugou shouted, jumping up from the bed. You laughed as you closed the door behind you and sauntered down the hall.

***

Kirishima poked his head out of his room a moment later at Bakugou's shout and the sound of female laughter. He saw your [h/c] hair turning the corner toward the stairs and smiled in the hopes that you and Bakugou had finally talked. You at least seemed happy.

He walked out of his room and knocked on the door next to his own. "You goddamn tease..." Bakugou threw open the door but froze at seeing Kirishima. The red-haired boy quirked an eyebrow and smiled wickedly, his sharp teeth glistening.

"A tease, am I?" Kirishima shouldered his way past Bakugou and into his room.

"Get out."

"I think I want to hear about why I'm a tease." Kirishima jumped on Bakugou's bed, placing his hands behind his head and lounging with a smug smirk on his face.

"Out now, Shitty Hair." Bakugou's face was still red.

"I saw [y/n] walking down the hall."

"I hate you."

"You love me." Kirishima propped himself of his elbows. "But not as much as you love 'the tease'." Bakugou shot an ineffectual blast at the boy's stomach. Kirishima hardened just in time. "Hey, hey, I'm just playing man. But did you tell her? She seemed happy. Well, she was laughing so I guess that could mean a bunch of things..."

"She knows," Bakugou cut his friend off.

"And...!" Kirishima's eyes were wide with wonder.

"And..." Bakugou brushed a hand through his hair, suddenly shy. "It went well." Kirishima jumped from the bed and hugged Bakugou around the waist. Bakugou immediately stiffened and tried to pry the redhead off his torso. "GET THE FUCK OFF ME!"

"Oh my God, I'm so happy! I have to go congratulate her. Are you going on a date? Mina will want to help you plan a date. I'll text Mina right now and..." Bakugou smacked him upside the head.

"You're not saying shit to anyone!" Kirishima's brows furrowed.

"But I thought you said..."

"I have no idea what we are. I know and she knows. And she's a really good fucking kisser." Bakugou wished he could stuff the words back into his mouth because Kirishima looked like he might explode with joy. "YOU ARE NOT GONNA SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT!"

"Please? Just Mina? What about Hanta or Denki?"

"NO."

"Can I at least go talk to [y/n]? I've hated keeping this a secret from her," Kirishima pleaded. Bakugou did hate that he'd asked his best friend to lie to you about his silence. He gave him one last glare but didn't say 'no'.

"Get out of here." Kirishima walked out of the room smiling.

***

Kirishima jogged up to your room on the fifth floor, excited for his two best friends. He hadn't even thought about how good you two could be together until Bakugou had nearly ripped his head off after receiving that punch to the jaw.

Bakugou seemed to laugh more when he was near you. He seemed to let down his guard and remember that he was just another teenager with friends. But he also made you more daring, a bit surer in your plans, and a hell of a lot deadlier in battle. You were both strong, driven and brilliant. The fact that you could calm his aggression and he could rile up your determination made you a dangerous duo, not to mention your quirks paired so nicely.

He almost felt silly for having kissed you when it was so clear how you both felt for each other, after some reflection. The connection Kirishima had with you was definitely friendship, whereas Bakugou's ran deeper. But it might have finally been the thing to make you both admit your feelings, so he couldn't feel too guilty.

Your door was cracked open. "Hey [y/n], just talked to my boy Baku... what's wrong?"

You stood in the center of your room, facing away from the door and staring at the phone in your hand. Your shoulders were slumped and Kirishima could see your breathing become ragged. At his voice you turned. Your eyes were distant, looking right through him. A dark haze of smoke circled around your feet.

"My mom's in the hospital. She had a heart attack." The words didn't feel like yours as they left your mouth. "I...I need to go see her." You started grabbing at dresser drawers, not knowing what you were looking for.

"[y/n], stop. Take a breath." Kirishima was beside you, holding your shoulders in his hands. You looked up into his face, filled with the same worry you felt. You tried to breathe in. "What do you need?"

"My bag." Your voice was small. Kirishima picked up your backpack.

"Good. What else?"

"My phone, keys, wallet." Kirishima took the phone still clutched in your hand and dropped it into the backpack. He found your wallet and keys still in the front pocket of the bag.

"I'll come with you okay?" You dumbly nodded and followed the red-haired boy out of your room.

***

"We're looking for Mrs. [l/n] Ana," Kirishima asked the pretty blonde nurse at the hospital information desk.

"Are you family?" Her tone was sweet and kind.

"I'm her daughter, [y/n]," you said, some of the shock finally having worn off during the train ride over. Kirishima had wrapped his arm around your shoulders as you rode the few stations to the hospital. His stalwart presence helped calm you.

"Will a Mr. [l/n] be joining?" she asked, typing the surname into her computer.

"There is no Mr. [l/n]. It's just me." You felt the familiar sting of acknowledging your father was no longer around. It was stronger than usual with your mother in such a condition. Kirishima picked up on your change in tone but didn't say anything.

"Well then dear, it's room 313. Your friend will have to stay outside." She handed each of you a visitor badge and pointed toward the elevator bank to her right.

"Thank you." Kirishima guided you away from the desk, trying to keep his manner as light as possible.

***

You stared at the door to room 313. A wide window looked into the room. You saw tubes and IV bags, monitors and instruments. In the center of it all was your mother.

If I don't go in, if I don't touch her, maybe this isn't really happening.

Your hand hovered over the doorknob. You took one big inhale and turned it.

"I'll be right out here," Kirishima said as you pushed through. You looked over your shoulder and gave him a sad smile before stepping into the room.

"Mom?" You stepped painfully slow toward the bed, hearing every footstep amplified. A heart-rate monitor beeped evenly. You lightly brushed her fingertips with your own.

A green sheet pulled back and a man in a long white coat stepped from behind, having been focused on the other patient in the double room. He started at seeing you.

"Sorry. I should have knocked or something," you said, pulling your hand away from your mother.

"I'm Dr. Iyasumoto. I'm guessing you're her daughter?" His voice was deep and kind. You nodded, looking back at her sleeping form. "You look just like her." His simple comment brought a soft smile to your face.

"Everyone says that," you replied quietly.

"She had a heart attack. Seems she has substantial atherosclerosis." You quirked an eyebrow. "It's a buildup of fatty substances in the arteries. Is your mother by any chance a smoker?" he questioned. You couldn't help but let out a breathy laugh.

"In a sense." It was the doctor's turn to raise a brow. "Her quirk is called Smokescreen. She can breathe out smoke. She could fill this whole room easily." The doctor hummed, jotting down a note on her chart. "Her quirk gave her a heart attack?"

"Not on its own, but any form of smoke can affect the heart and lungs. After-" he checked the chart- "40 years of breathing it in and out..." he trailed off.

"Will she be alright?" You sat down in the chair beside her bed and brushed her fingertips again.

"We're doing some tests to see what caused it. But her vitals look good. She'll need some aftercare, we'll prescribe some medications, and I'd suggest she not use her quirk if she can help it." He scanned a monitor and poked at the IV bag. "She'll have to stay with us for a few days for observation once she wakes up."

"And when will she wake up?" Your fingers trailed along her arm and rested on her shoulder.

"Her body's been through a lot today. We just have to wait and see." He patted your shoulder as he headed to the door. "If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to reach out to me or one of the nurses." He flashed you a reassuring smile and left the room.

"Mom?" You stroked her hair, feeling the first tears prick your eyes. "I need you to be strong mom. I need you to be okay. I can't... I can't be a hero for you here." You felt the sting of salt before you saw the droplets stain the bed sheets.

"I should have stopped by more often. I should have called you more. I have so many things I need to talk to you about." You rubbed the tears from your eyes and sniffled. "I'm getting so much stronger. I think you'd be proud. I learned how to release my fire. I don't have to be afraid of it anymore mommy." You exhaled, silent for a long moment.

"I met a boy mom. He's really cute. His name's Katsuki. He's the one I beat in the finals. With the explosions. Remember him? I don't think you'd like him at first," you breathed out a laugh, sure your mother would be horrified at Bakugou's demeanor, "but he grows on you. He kissed me today." You smiled softly at the memory. It couldn't possibly be the same day. So much in your world had changed.

"I think you'd like all my friends at school actually. I told you about Kiri, my first partner. He brought me here today. I was too much of a wreck to come alone. Maybe next time I come visit you can meet him. Then there's Shouto. He's my current partner, the one who took me to that fancy dance. He's going to help me with my fire powers. Let's see, who else? Well there's Mina and Toru..."

***

You stood from your mother's bedside twenty minutes later, feeling lighter. You'd always been close with your mother and you hadn't realized how much you missed her. Living in the dorms and going to a new school had been so overwhelming and all-encompassing you'd almost taken her love and presence for granted. Telling her about your life, your quirk and your friends made the situation feel a little less morose, a little more normal.

"Bakugou? When? Why? What are you...?" The ash blond boy was sitting outside the door. He wore dark jeans paired with an army green button down over a white tee. You weren't sure if you'd ever seen him out of black attire other than his uniform.

"I invited him." Kirishima rose from his seat.

"Why would you...?" The perplexed look didn't leave your face.

"He knows." Bakugou nudged his head toward Kirishima. Your brow smoothed and your lips quirked up just slightly.

"Thanks Kiri," you said softly.

"No problem. I'll leave you two." Kirishima wrapped you in a big hug and then pushed you gently toward Bakugou. He patted his friend's shoulder. "Let me know if you need anything [y/n]." You gave an appreciative nod. Kirishima turned and walked down the hall and out of sight.

"You okay?" Bakugou asked after a quiet moment. His hands were shoved in his pockets as he looked tentatively at you, not sure what to do. You turned to face the window that looked into your mother's room.

"The doctor says her vitals are good. We just have to wait." You felt your voice catch in your throat. After talking about such light topics, it felt harder to discuss her condition. Bakugou stepped beside you and took your hand in his, lacing your fingers between his own. You looked down at your interwoven hands and smiled softly, before returning your gaze to the window.

"I was six," you said, seemingly from nowhere. Bakugou's brow furrowed.

"You were six?"

"When my dad died. It was a Tuesday, and he was running late to work. He was crossing the street, and a guy flew through a red light. It was a hit and run. The police never found out who it was. But at least they said he didn't feel any pain." Bakugou squeezed your hand but didn't speak, remembering the picture you'd recovered from Monoma.

"That's when I decided I wanted to be a hero." Bakugou turned to face you, a question in his eyes. "I didn't want any more little girls to grow up without their dads."

"You have a really fucked up backstory, don't you?" he finally spoke. You softly chuckled and looked down toward your feet.

"I guess so." You looked back toward the window. "And I can't have losing her be a part of it."