XIX

Jackie's POV:

"No, Ash, we're going to Calum's house." I say, swiping red lipstick across my mouth quickly. He's been trying to convince me to go to a frat party tonight but I refuse.

"But Jackie - "

"Look, you can go to the frat party if you want. I'm going to Calum's." I say, looking Ashton dead in the eyes.

"Fine." he huffs, slipping his chuck taylors on.

We decide to go a little bit early to help them set up beforehand.

Calum's POV:

"What if she doesn't come?" I ask Michael as I pace back and forth in the kitchen.

"You're going to wear holes in the tile." Michael says, pointing to my feet.

"Fuck off."

"She'll come. Don't worry about it. She's crazy about you." Luke says and I stop in my tracks.

"What?"

"She likes you, mate. You like her too, I can tell." Michael agrees with Luke.

"Yeah." I mutter absentmindedly.

Then the doorbell rings and I take off.

Jackie's there and she looks fucking amazing. This is the first time I've seen her in a skirt. And she's wearing an an All Time Low tank top. And it all clings to every curve of her body. And she's wearing makeup? And she's smiling at me. And I'm smiling back. And -

"Bloody hell, Cal quit staring." I hear Ashton call from next to her. I didn't even notice him there before.

I gesture for them to enter but grab Jackie's hand to hold her back from following Ashton.

"You look really nice." I whisper into her ear and when I pull back I see that her cheeks are beginning to match her lips - bright red.

"Thanks." she says then places a quick kiss to my cheek before starting toward the kitchen.

Ashton and Jackie help us set up and the doorbell starts ringing more and more rapidly as the night goes on.

The night goes by in a blur but I stay with Jackie the entire time, holding her hand.

After a few drinks I tell her she's had enough and she pouts but then agrees.

I had a couple of drinks but I'm not drunk or even tipsy. I didn't need to drink that much, didn't want to. She's here and that's more than enough for me.

Jackie starts to pull me down the hall, toward my bedroom and I laugh at how strong she is when she's drunk.

Jackie's POV:

I'm standing right in front of him and his brown eyes are on fire. I'm sure mine are too.

"What?" he asks, bringing one hand up to my bruised cheek as he slowly leans down to rest his forehead against mine.

"What do you wanna do?" he asks and I bite my lip as I think.

I've had too much to drink but I feel good. I don't know why I brought him here. I just wanted to get away from everyone. I just wanted to be with him and only him.

"Um - " I begin but am cut off by his lips on mine.

I wrap my arms around his neck and thread my fingers into his hair.

He  pushes me back against the wall as his hands go to the backs of my thighs, willing me to jump which I do.

Then he's carrying me over to the bed. And I'm panicking.

I can't do this. I don't want this. Not yet.

Is that what he thought? I wouldn't blame him if he did.

I can't think clearly right now.

"Cal, Cal." I panic as he rests me back on the bed.

He pulls away and locks eyes with me.

"What's wrong?" he asks breathily.

"Um, this. We need to slow down. I need to slow down. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to mislead you." I say.

"I didn't mean to scare you. I wasn't going to make you do anything."

"I know." I say, unwrapping my legs from him.

"I'm sorry." he says quietly as he pulls away from me.

I get up wordlessly and walk to the bathroom to wash the makeup from my face.

Are we moving too fast or am I just moving too slow?

I don't know. I need sleep. It's late and I drank way too much.

I take a few deep breaths then walk back into his bedroom, bursting with embarrassment at what just happened between me and him. What I just caused to happen. What the liquor just caused to happen.

This boy's going to be the death of me.

Calum's POV:

I fucked up. I'm used to girls who put out the same night you meet them, I'm used to girls who don't give a fuck about anything or anyone. I'm not used girls like Jackie, I don't know what's acceptable and what's not. 

But one thing that I do know is that I shouldn't have done that.

I can't think clearly when I'm around her.

When I look up she's standing at the end of my bed, cheeks crimson and gorgeous as ever.

"So, uh, that." she says, referring to our awkward interaction only a few minutes ago.

"I'm really sorry, Jackie. I didn't mean to - "

She cuts me off by saying "You didn't do anything wrong. At all. I'm just not ready for that. And I drank too much. If you want me to go I'd understand." her gaze drops to her feet as she speaks the last sentence.

"C'mere." I hold my arms open to her.

She walks into them and molds herself against me. How do we fit so well together?

"I'll wait as long as you need. I'm really sorry." I say quietly into her ear.

"You don't have to." she replies.

"I want to."

"Well, that's quite a lot of pressure." I feel her chest vibrate against my own as she laughs.

"No pressure, at all." I say seriously in response.

I tighten my grip around her waist and pull her to lay next to me on the bed.

"Get some sleep, I'll be here."

She nods wearily into my chest and her breathing slows with relaxation within minutes despite the loud thump of music coming from every direction of the house.

"What are you doing to me?" I whisper into her hair once I'm sure she's asleep. 

...

The next week passes quickly.

Jackie's been staying over since the party but she's out at work or school most of the time.

I miss her.

Then it's Thursday, her birthday. Apparently I can't take her out on her birthday because her and Ashton are going to the cinema so Friday is reserved for me instead.

I bought a pair of tickets for us to go to the Green Day concert that day.

I think she'll like it, I hope she'll like it.

Jackie's POV:

Today's my birthday. A day just like any other. But today Ashton and me are going to the movies.

I convinced him to see The Fault in Our Stars with me. I had to pout my lip, use puppy dog eyes, and say "Pretty, pretty, please Ash? It's my birthday." before he agreed to it. But he did. Eventually.

We both cry practically the whole time.

It's funny watching Ashton try to act manly when we leave. Pretending like I couldn't see how bloodshot and puffy his eyes are.

"Y'know, real men cry." I say, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Shut up, Jackie, I'm not crying. My eyes are leaking." he smiles at me.

I spend the night at Ashton's house. We order pizza after bickering for at least thirty minutes about which toppings to get. Then we watch old TV reruns and fall asleep sprawled out in his small living room.

I've been staying at Calum's house most nights and this morning I woke up to text messages from him.

Calum (09:30):

*Good morning, beautiful.*

I sleep through that one.

Calum (09:45):

*What time're you gonna be here?*

I sleep through that one too.

Calum (10:00):

*Text me when you wake up.*

Then I wake up.

Jackie (10:05):

*Sorry. I was asleep. Good morning. I'll be over soon-ish :)*

Calum (10:06)

*Okay. Text me when you leave.*

What's he up to? He demanded that I reserve a whole day for me and him to spend together.

Today's that day.

I finally get to his house. The first thing I smell when I walk through the door is sugar.

I wander into the kitchen and find Michael, Luke, Calum and his mom standing at the breakfast bar.

There's a cake on the bar. I haven't had a birthday cake in years.

The cheesy happy birthday song commences and I stand awkwardly, shifting from one foot to the other just like always. I'm sure my face is bright red but my eyes are watery.

This was really nice of them to do. Too nice.

"Blow out your candles, honey." Calum's mom says, pulling me over to the cake.

I close my eyes and wish.

I wish for this to last. This is what I want. What I need. To be surrounded by people like this, not people like my parents.

When I open my eyes they're all smiling at me and I burst out laughing.

Calum walks over to me and his hands come up to my cheeks.

Then he kisses me.

In front of everyone.

And I let him.

"Happy Birthday." he says quietly when he pulls away.

"Thanks." I whisper as a smile spreads across my face.

"Now, we have somewhere to go." he says.

"Where?"

"That, my dear, is a surprise." he says, pulling a blindfold from the back pocket of his black skinny jeans.

"Um, are you taking me to the desert to murder me without any witnesses then hide my body?" I joke.

"Something like that." he replies, laughing.

Then he slips the blindfold over my eyes and is pushing me out the door.

"Wait, wait." I say, dragging my feet.

"What?"

"Thank you Mrs. Hood and Luke and Michael. That means a lot." I say pointing to the cake. "I haven't had one in a really long time." then I rush over and hug them all quickly.

"You're welcome, now go have fun." his mom says with a kind smile and I nod before walking back over to Calum.

A/N: If you were to ask me to describe 5SOS in one picture it'd be that one on the side there. Hands down. I mean, just look at Ashton's face.

Anyways, thank you so very much for reading!

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