The Trio

Merle had knocked me unconscious, again.

I opened my eyes some time later, confused to no longer hear the sounds of battle raging around me. Instead, the air was quiet, and I was being carried through an unfamiliar woodland.

"She's waking up." I heard Beth say, relieved, as felt myself being lowered to the ground.

"Sorry Xena. I made a promise." Merle spoke softly, crouching beside me.

"You piece of shit!" I cried out, my eyes finally focusing. I grasped his shirt, "Where is he!?"

"I... I dunno." He replied, his eyes pained.

"I'm going back!" I announced, pulling my knife from its sheath and holding it to Merle's throat in threat, "Tell me which way we came."

"Athena." Beth said gently, "It got bad. We had to leave."

"But, Daryl..." I whispered, my body shaking, knife clattering to the floor as I lost my grip on it.

"There were explosions everywhere. Everyone had to bail in different directions." She pulled me into a hug. "We heard him yelling for you, but we couldn't find him through the smoke and fire. I'm sure he's okay somewhere..."

"No." I protested, pushing her off of me. "I need to find him."

"Beth's gotta get treat ya shoulder before we can do anythin'. "Merle insisted, "We need t' find somewhere."

"Please." I begged Merle. "He could be hurt."

"Look, I'll go back while Beth sorts ya out, see if I can find him. Just gotta get somewhere safe first." He tried to reassure me.

~

Merle returned hours later, alone

"Couldn't find 'im." He revealed, dismayed. "Herd has taken over the prison. He ain't there."

No.

I clenched my fists until I felt the skin beneath my nails break. I didn't want to be apart from Daryl, to have to carry on without even knowing if he was alive. I couldn't.

"We'll keep lookin'." Merle assured, "My li'l bro is tough. He'll be somewhere."

~

The next couple of days passed in a blur. Beth had patched up my shoulder as best she could, but it stung as though it was becoming infected. The three of us had taken shelter in an old barn. Beth picked apples from a nearby tree to keep us sustained.

I barely said a word to either of them. I'd shut myself down. It felt like the only way I could keep breathing.

Daryl was gone. Even if he was alive, I'd probably never see him again.

The pain of losing the most incredible man I'd ever met broke me. I couldn't allow myself to grieve him, our relationship, because if I did - it would destroy me. Closing off my emotions and becoming next-to-inhuman was my only option for survival.

"Athena." Beth whispered as she sat down beside me. "Why don't you come inside with us?"

I didn't answer her. Instead, I kept my gaze fixed ahead, staring into nothingness.

"You need to at least eat something." She tried again.

"Why!?" I snapped at her. "What's the point?"

She looked taken aback by my sudden decision to speak after days of selective mutism.

"He'll be okay." She offered, touching my shoulder, but I shrugged her hand off.

"Don't." I spoke sternly. "Just, don't."

A lone walker emerged from the bushes, snarling and groaning.

"Go inside." I instructed Beth plainly.

She looked between me and the walker before giving up and doing as I'd asked.

I moved toward the encroaching biter, reaching for my knife out of my belt, but removed my hand once I felt it's hilt, choosing to ball my fists instead and lunging toward my adversary unarmed.

I threw punch after ferocious punch, not relenting even as it fell to the ground. I kicked, and I hit, and I stomped as hard as I could until the walker lay motionless and disfigured on the dirt in front of me. I bent over, trying to get a grip on my breathing.

"Damn, Xena." Merle called from the doorway, eyes tracing the gore now covering me. "Ya need a little anger management?"

"Fuck off." I spat.

This wasn't Merle's fault. He'd carried me off to honor his promise to his brother, to keep me safe, but I was still seething with him. Beth hadn't done anything wrong either, but she was getting the sharp end of my attitude too. I knew the poor girl would be worried sick about her father, Maggie and Glenn, but I couldn't bring myself to show her any sympathy. I was numb.

~

Two days later, we found ourselves entering an abandoned country club after running out of supplies at the barn. I'd still barely engaged in conversation with them, but I was glad not to be alone, even if I wasn't showing it.

I felt uncomfortable venturing even further away from the direction of the prison, putting more space between us and the last place Daryl and I had been together, but we needed food and water. We couldn't stay holed up in the barn any longer.

The club was trashed, as was everywhere nowadays. The moans of walkers could be heard echoing in the distance as we walked down the halls.

"Let's search quick." Merle said, knife in hand.

Beth nodded. I stayed silent.

We only moved alone through the building for a moment, before we were ambushed by the undead. The three of us took them down in a frenzy, slashing and stabbing.

I couldn't help but let an iota of a smile slip as I saw Beth stabbing a walker through the eye with her knife. She was always separate from conflict, usually opting to take charge of the children, so it was reassuring to see that she could, in fact, handle herself.

In the chaos of our fight, we'd found ourselves pushed toward the club's bar. The familiarity of what used to be such a regular place for people to meet and socialize feeling alien now.

"I need a drink." Beth announced, scanning the empty shelves, while stashing packets of bar nuts in her bag.

"Don't we all." Merle retorted, rifling through the cabinets.

"I've never had one." She revealed.

"Ya never had a drink?" Merle spluttered, astounded.

"Nope." Beth smiled as she lifted a half-empty bottle of Peach Schnapps from the floor. "But I found this. Is it good?"

"No." I couldn't stop myself muttering

"Well it's the only thing left."

"I'm not gonna have your first drink be no damn peach schnapps." I sighed, snatching the bottle from her and tossing it at the mirror behind the bar, "Come on."

I lead the two of them East. The country club had looked familiar, and now I'd realised why. I'd once passed it while out on a run with Michonne. We'd got into trouble and ended up hiding out briefly in an old shack - a shack that I remember having a suspicious-looking shed outside.

"My dad had a place just like this." Merle commented as we arrived at the Moonshine shed behind the shack.

A surge of anger coursed through me. I still didn't know the details of Daryl's past but I knew their father had hurt him.

"Ya got your dumpster chair." Merle continued, pointing out his findings inside the shed. "That's for sitting in your drawers all summer drinkin'. Got your fancy buckets. That's for spitting chaw in after yur old lady tells ya to stop smokin'."

We took the Moonshine and made our way inside the derelict shack for the night.

"Alright. That's a real first drink right there." Merle told Beth, as he poured some of the clear liquid into three glasses he'd taken from one of the shack's cupboards."

"My dad always said bad moonshine can make you go blind." Beth mused, her face unsure.

"There's nothing worth seeing out there anymore anyway." I huffed as I threw back the entire contents of my glass in one, motioning to Merle to pass me the bottle so I could refill.

Getting blackout drunk wasn't smart, but I was going to do it anyway.

"Careful, Xena. Don't want ya numbing ya'self even more." Merle said, finishing off his own glass.

I rolled my eyes.

"That's the most disgusting thing I've ever tasted." Beth choked as she took her first sip, but immediately took a second.

I downed glass after glass, staring out of the window at nothing in particular, my eyes blurry from intoxication. Merle and Beth sat behind me, enjoying their own drinks. She was trying to explain the concept of the drinking game 'I Have Never' to him and he didn't look impressed.

"Come on, it's fun." She insisted, before turning to face me. "Athena, come play."

"Nah."

"Please Athena." Beth tried again.

"I'll play, if ya do." Merle suggested.

"Please?" Beth begged.

I gave in, moving over to join them where they sat.

"Okay, I'll start." Beth told Merle. "I've never chopped off my hand. So now you drink."

Merle looked outraged for a second, but then chuckled and took a sip. Readying to take his own turn.

"I've never bein' outta Georgia." He revealed.

My stomach tightened as I remembered Daryl using the same words back on our waterfall date. I downed my drink to shake the memory, reaching for the bottle to refill again.

We played for a while, the three of us getting more messy as we guzzled almost the full bottle of moonshine.

"I've never taken it up the butt." I slurred, eyeing Merle who looked disgusted. Beth laughed heartily at both my statement and his reaction.

"I've never been in jail. I mean, as a prisoner." Beth posed, eyeing Merle as he took his sip, his time in juvy as a teenager no secret.

I drank, too.

Both of them noticed.

They stared at me in confusion.

"Yup!" I hiccupped. "Used to care about people finding out." Another hiccup. "But doesn't fucking matter now. Nothing does."

"Jeez." Merle uttered, surprised. "Did my brother know?"

"Yup." I told him, stifling another hiccup and also the emotion moving up through my throat, "He wanted me regardless. Made me feel-"

I couldn't continue speaking.

Tears stung my eyes as I remembered how safe Daryl had made me feel when I confessed my past to him, how he'd held my hand as I spilled my guts. My heart ached for him, and I felt robbed that he'd been taken from me.

I launched my glass at the wall, the smash unnerving both Beth and Merle. I kicked my chair aside and stormed through the door into the fresh air, choking back tears.

"Athena." Beth called as they followed me outside.

"I'm fine!" I lied. "Just need some air."

They ignored my request, edging closer to where I stood with my back to them.

"I miss him too." Merle spoke, his voice vulnerable in a way I'd never heard before.

That did it.

A monstrous wail escaped me as I broke down sobbing. I sounded like a dying animal, my shoulders heaving with emotion.

"He's gone." I cried, as Beth moved closer and wrapped her arms around my waist, bracing me from behind as my body crumpled to the ground.

Neither of them spoke, they didn't know if he was alive any more than I did, but they stayed by my side as I fell apart.

When I regained a tad of composure a while later, Beth released her hold and I manoeuvred myself so I sat firmly on the ground, tears still slipping down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry." I told them. "It's just not fair. None of this is. They're all gone."

Merle stood awkwardly while Beth continued to comfort me. He finally offered me a brief, one-armed hug when I stood. He tensed up at the physical contact just like his brother used to.

We returned inside. The Moonshine was gone now, but the three of us talked the night away regardless, the alcohol loosening our inhibitions and allowing us to speak openly.

Beth spoke about her mother, and how it had made her feel to see the woman who birthed her reanimate as a walker. I told them about Selene, about what Mark had done to her and of the ensuing events that had landed me in jail. I also talked about losing my parents. Merle was a little more guarded, but did reveal that he'd once been in love with a girl called Emma.

In our drunken haze, one of us - could have been anyone - decided that we should light the shack on fire. It was a terrible idea, but Dawn was breaking and we didn't plan on staying another night, so we did.

The three of us watched as flames tore through the building, the light starting to hurt my eyes as my hangover crept in.

It took hours for us to find another building that wasn't either completely ransacked or surrounded by walkers. Finally, we came across a funeral home, complete with its own graveyard.

I winced as I saw the heartfelt inscriptions on the tombstones as we passed by them. If Daryl was dead, he'd never get a proper burial, just like my parents, and Bob.

Inside of the funeral home seemed clean, like it had been inhabited recently. Beth had even commented that there was no dust on the stacks of food we'd found in the cupboards. Whoever had been staying here, they hadn't been gone for long.

We sat at the kitchen table and ate together like the world's most dysfunctional family. A dad with a robot hand that he'd twice used to knock the mother out cold, while the mother had her own sordid past of being a literal murderer and technically escaped convict.

I didn't eat much, I couldn't, but Merle and Beth gorged on peanut butter and jelly, diet soda and dried pigs feet. We'd been interrupted by a stray dog howling at the door. Beth wanted us to let it inside, but it ran off before we got the chance.

I also helped myself to a bottle of antibiotics I'd found in the bathroom cabinet. My gunshot wound hadn't turned green yet, but it itched like a mother fucker.

Later in the evening, Beth played a song on the piano. I'd never heard it before, but it brought tears to my eyes regardless. The last time I could remember hearing her sing was out in the yard the first night we took the prison - the night that Daryl had first called me 'Ath'.

Merle rested a hand on my shoulder as he listened to Beth's harmonizing, obviously aware of my anguish. The gesture meant a lot from Daryl's brother.

The moment was ruined by more sound outside, it sounded like our dog was back, and it was in pain.

Merle opened the door this time, Beth and I just behind him, but he was instantly set upon by throws of walkers.

"Holy shitballs!" He called out as one very nearly took a bite out of his neck.

I grasped my knife and began driving it through our attackers, Merle doing the same, but it was no use. There was too many of them and now we were trapped.

"You guys take the window." I yelled, twisting my knife into another walker.

"Nah!" Merle rebuffed, "You go first."

"No." I said it first.

"I don't care. Go!"

"Guys!" Beth screamed, "We do not have time for this!"

She was right. I relented, grabbing her hand and pulling her through the kitchen window behind me, my weapon raised.

We were waiting for Merle to join us, taking down stray walkers that approached, when I noticed Beth was no longer beside me.

"Beth?" I called out in confusion, before a rag was placed in front on my face, something poured onto it making me go dizzy.

The next thing I knew, I was being bundled into the back of a car. I couldn't move, my body felt limp. I caught a glance of an identical car - also black with a cross on the back window - as the door slammed shut. I could only assume that Beth was in it.

My head swam with questions.

Who were these people?

What did they want?

Where were they taking us?

Had Merle made it out?

I fought to keep my eyes open, everything in me wanting to close them and rest. Whatever was on that rag was strong, and it was meant to immobilise me. Luckily I'd had the awareness to stop inhaling once I realised that the rag had been doused, meaning that although it had allowed them to get me in the vehicle, I wasn't unconscious like they thought.

I waited until I could move my limbs properly before pulling myself up quickly and plunging my spare blade into the neck of the driver. I'd dropped my usual knife in the struggle, but the idiots hadn't bothered checking I wasn't further armed.

The car swerved, and the man in the passenger seat flailed his arms around, trying to grab hold of the knife. His brown eyes looked terrified as he realised at the same moment I did that the car was veering straight toward an embankment.

The back doors were locked, but I threw myself across the drivers seat, giving the dead chauffer a very ungraceful lapdance in the process. I swung open the door and hurled myself out of it, landing on the grass with a thud and rolling a few times before managing to halt my movement.

I never saw the passenger exit the car, so must still have been inside. The vehicle sped down the slope and landed with a crash on its roof. I wanted to run, but if the guy was still alive in there, he could be the only person able to tell me where Beth was.

I started bounding toward the scene.

He was not alive.

It was gruesome, even by current standards. A tree branch had made its way through the windscreen and skewered him like a mangled kebab.

It was gross.

I slipped the knife I'd manage to keep a grasp on through both men's temples to prevent them from reanimating, and I took a second to think about my next steps.

I had no idea where Beth was being taken. The highway we were hurtling towards could lead anywhere. Following it blindly wasn't an option. Instead, I decided to backtrack to the funeral home in search of what I hoped was a still-alive Merle. I hadn't seen a third vehicle, so I hastened a guess that he hadn't been taken too.

It took me a long time to make it back, my body weary from whatever I'd been drugged with, and my shoulder throbbing from throwing myself out of a moving vehicle like a maniac.

Merle wasn't there.

I searched the house, the grounds, and even the nearby woodland. He was gone.

Now what the fuck was I supposed to do?

What do you think about Athena, Merle and Beth escaping together? I feel like most fanfics stick to the show and have Daryl flee with Beth, so I wanted to mix things up.

Daryl's POV coming next! 🫢