Chapter 39 - Love pt. 2

San's POV

I had been avoiding Wooyoung for five days straight. At first it was easy, since everyone was focused on the drama surrounding Hongjoong. But the last few days had been increasingly difficult. He kept looking for me when I was alone to talk, and I had officially run out of excuses to leave the apartment. I knew that he knew that I was avoiding him. I could see the disappointment in his eyes every time I said that I need to run to the convenience store or help Yeosang with something.

Today, after waking up, I had no idea how I was going to avoid him. I couldn't just live in my room forever. I just had to make sure that everyone was around, and that I wasn't alone with him.

I climbed out of my bed and got dressed in my favourite black skinny jeans and black V-neck sweater. I made my way out to the kitchen to see what everyone else was up to. If I was lucky, maybe I could tag along somewhere.

But when I reached the kitchen, it was empty. In fact, the whole apartment was dead quiet.

Maybe I'm the only one home?

I went over to the fridge, grabbing some bread and jam. I popped the two slices of bread into the toaster and sat down to wait. I watched the rain was splattering against the kitchen window.

"Hey San."

My body tensed. I recognized the voice even before turning.

"Hi..." I responded, greeting Wooyoung coldly.

"What are you doing?" He asked awkwardly, staring down at his feet.

"Making toast." I mumbled back, not wanting this conversation progress past the small talk. "Where is everyone?"

"They all went to see a movie."

"A movie? But it's 10 o'clock in the morning. Who watches movies that early?" I asked, perplexed.

Wooyoung fidgeted nervously. "Actually... I asked them to go out this morning. I wanted to talk to..."

"Actually, you know what? A movie sounds good right now, I'm going to go join them." I interrupted. I knew what he was going to say, and I didn't want to hear it. I marched over to the front entrance and grabbed my jacket off of the coat rack.

"Wait... what about your toast?" He asked, frustrated about being blown off once again.

I responded quickly. "I just realized that I'm not that hungry. You can have it instead."

I slipped on my sneakers and reached for the door, getting ready to leave. Wooyoung walked over towards me.

"Wait, San, can you please just..."

"Sorry Woo, I'll see you later." I called out, cutting him off again. I opened the door, coming close to successfully ignoring his efforts once again, but after being constantly avoided for almost a week, Wooyoung had zero remaining patience.

"CHOI SAN, GET BACK IN HERE." He shouted. I froze in place immediately, with one foot on either side of the door frame. He had never shouted at me before. Not once.

His voice calmed a little, "Stop ignoring me. I just want to talk to you."

I gulped and slowly stepped back inside the apartment. As I turned around, I made eye contact with him for the first time since his drunken night. His eyes had large dark circles from lack of sleep, and my heart ached a little with guilt.

We sat down at the kitchen table, staying a comfortable few feet apart. I hadn't let myself worry about him since the incident, but now I worried that I might have taken my grudge a little bit too far.

"Look San, I know that you're upset because of what I said when I was drunk," Wooyoung started, "But you have to talk to me. I'm going insane here."

I decided that at this point that we might as well get the talk over with since there was no more possibility to run away. Still, I tried to keep my composure. "Fine, let's talk then."

"First I wanted to apologize to you. Because I shouldn't have said that when I was drunk. It was stupid of me."

His words immediately hurt. This was what I wanted to avoid more than anything.

"So first you kissed me and said it was a mistake, then you tell me that you love me, and that was a mistake as well?" I snapped, crossing my arms against my chest. "You can't just do that Wooyoung. You can't just play with my feelings like that."

His head shot up, "No! That's not what I meant, I just... I was figuring some things out. I shouldn't have done those things when I did, but that doesn't mean that I regret doing them. I just got confused about what I was feeling and what that made me."

His voice got so quiet. I looked over, thinking that I had never seen the lilac-haired man look so tiny before. "S-so... you mean that..."

"Yes, San. I wanted to kiss you. And I still want to kiss you." He took a nervous breath, then looked up at me with his deep brown eyes, "And... I love you."

My breath caught in my throat. Any residual anger that I had, instantly melted away. I could feel my heart pounding away in my chest. "D-do you mean it? You love me?"

"Yes, more than anything. I'm sorry that it took me being blackout drunk to tell you, but it's the truth," He scooted his chair closer to mine, so that he could look at me more directly. "I was only unsure about what this meant about me. I had never considered that I was...gay, I mean, I've liked girls before. I was just confused, and scared. I know my parents would hate it. I just couldn't accept it."

"Oh Woo, I wish you had told me before. You've been dealing with so much by yourself." I squeaked out, wanting to hug him more than anything. "You might not be gay, but you might be bisexual. Either way, I'll be here for you, whatever you need. I just need you to talk to me."

"I will, I promise." Wooyoung whispered. "I'm so so sorry Sannie."

Tears began to form in my eyes. "It's okay Woo, I forgive you."

Finally, Wooyoung got up and walked over to where I was seated. He curled up on my lap and wrapped his arms around my torso. I reciprocated, holding him into me tightly. I felt tears fall from my eyes, overwhelmed as my fears dissipated and were replaced with pure joy.

"I love you Choi San." Wooyoung giggled into my ear.

"I love you too Jung Wooyoung."

Suddenly, the front door beeped open, and Yunho walked into the apartment, followed by the others returning from their movie. He halted as soon as he noticed Wooyoung sitting on my lap, his eyes widening in surprise.

"Does this mean that you two made up?" Yunho asked, as the others gathered around to see what he was looking at.

I shared a look with Wooyoung, who grinned back at me.

"Yeah, yeah we did." I replied.

"Thank god," Yunho sighed jokingly, unable to hold back a smile, "Do you know how tense it's been in here for the past week?"

"Come on you two," Y/N winked at me, "We brought lunch. Let's celebrate."

Wooyoung got off of my lap, and sat down next to me for lunch, but he grabbed my hand, holding it tightly under the table throughout the entire meal. I struggled slightly to eat my sandwich with only one hand, but more than anything, I just didn't want to let him go.