Chapter 12: Eryndor

I didn't get to see my parents during the holidays. They were working. So I spent some time with my sisters. The youngest, Alethea, was born ten years after me. She was really cute and smart. Sophia was six and was pretty smart, too.

We stayed at the Tonks' and spent Christmas there. I got books. 

We then went back to Hogwarts and I asked to stay in my dorm with Talbott and Andre. Unfortunately, there was Victor too. I didn't like him. He had a huge ego. 

In Third Year, I made some friends. There was Bill Weasley, Charlie's brother, who was really kind and considered me like his brother. Emily Tyler, I didn't like her, but I was the only who she respected. Then, there was Brennan Doyle. I don't know why, but I didn't like him. He had a hard temper. 

Bill often asked me for help and I was glad to help him. I was the best duelist of the school because at the beginning of the year, I had won a duel against the best duelist of Hogwarts who was a Seventh Year. He now hated me. I wanted to be part of the Quidditch team, like Charlie, so we often spent time together too. The rest of the time, I was with my friends and Dora. 

"Ery?" my cousin asked me while we were sitting under a tree in the park, on a sunny Saturday. 

"Yeah?"

"Will you come back often during the holidays once you're at Beauxbatons?"

"Of course, Dora! But we don't have the same holidays, so we'll just see each other during the Christmas, Easter and Summer holidays."

"That's already pretty much. How many holidays do the French people have?"

"Two weeks for All-Saints day, two weeks at Christmas, two weeks in February, two weeks at Easter and two months in summer."

"Wow. When do they even work?" She asked, making me laugh.

*°*°*°

The Summer holidays arrived and dad accepted that I would go in Fifth Year next year. I could see that he was a little sad because he used to see his best friends during the summer holidays, but now two were dead and one was in Azkaban. 

He didn't make any comment on how smart I was or how proud of me he was and nor did mum. So I started thinking that maybe it wasn't enough. And I knew it wasn't. Mum always urged me to work more, to stay concentrated, to be a good big brother, to help Alethea and Sophia to take their bath, set the table, cook dinner whenever they were coming back home late... and even though I did everything she wanted, deep down, I knew it wasn't enough. Draco was perfect. She never told him anything, always congratulated him, while I tried to be as good as him. It never was Draco who had to be like me, which would be expected, given that I had the best grades, I was helping around the house and he was in his room, playing Muggle video games, but no. It was I who had to be like him and I didn't even question it. He was just perfect and I wasn't. 

*°*°*°

September arrived and with it the O.W.L.s, but I wasn't stressed. I already knew everything. 

So instead of studying, I asked Talbott to help me become an animagus and so he did. I had taken inspiration of my father's stories about his friends that he had told me once he had discovered that I knew. He told me that they had learned how to become Animagi to accompany him during the full moon and I had decided that I'd be doing the same for Chiara. In parallel of these lessons, I also had the Prefect duties and loved it because it made my days shorter.  

I already mastered the Patronus charm and could do it non-verbal. Mine took the shape of a Hippogriff. So in exchange of the animagus lessons, I taught Chiara and Talbott how to perform the Patronus charm. These sessions were our favorites. Nymphadora would sometimes join us in the ones I was teaching. Once they all were able to perform the Patronus charm and for it to take a corporeal form, I taught them some advanced defense spells.

Two months after classes had started, I became an animagus and could transform into a beautiful black Hippogriff with icy blue eyes. 

I then started to learn about Legilimency to become a Legilimens. And so I worked on everything to satisfy my thirst for knowledge except my O.W.L.s because I had learned everything there was to learn the previous year. 

The teachers didn't realise that all the essays I was handing them had been done the previous year as a training and told my aunt and uncle that I got top grades everywhere and had all the chances of having Outstandings everywhere in my O.W.L.s. 

My favorite subjects were Arithmancy, Defense Against the Dark Arts and Ancient Runes studies, just like mum and dad. People often said I was a perfect mix of both of them. 

The O.W.L. exams arrived and then left. I knew I had succeeded. I always did everywhere without even trying. 

Dora invited Talbott, Chiara and I at her place during the holidays and I knew that Sophia and Alethea would be there, too because mum and dad were again working. 

One morning, two weeks after my thirteenth birthday, I received an owl with my O.W.L. results. 

ORDINARY WIZARDING LEVEL RESULTS

Pass Grades: Fail Grades:

Outstanding (O)                         Poor (P)

                                            Exceeds Expectations (E)                  Dreadful (D)

Acceptable (A)                             Troll (T)

ELYZEUS AIDEN LUPIN HAS ACHIEVED:

Ancient Runes:                                                                                                                                                                     O

Arithmancy:                                                                                                                                                                           O

Astronomy:                                                                                                                                                                            O

Care of Magical Creatures:                                                                                                                                              O

Charms:                                                                                                                                                                                   O

Defense Against the Dark Arts:                                                                                                                                      O

Divination:                                                                                                                                                                              O

Herbology:                                                                                                                                                                             O

History of Magic:                                                                                                                                                                  O

Muggle Studies:                                                                                                                                                                   O

Potions:                                                                                                                                                                                   O

Transfiguration:                                                                                                                                                                   O

I smiled. I knew I would get these results: I had always got such grades and it was just obvious. I showed them to my friends, aunt, uncle and cousin and they smiled. No congratulations, nothing. They just smiled and gave the results back to me. 

I was starting to feel it. That anger against everyone. This feeling that, despite all my efforts, I'd never be perfect. Draco didn't have to try: He was perfect. But I, I'd never be like him. Despite all the perfect grades and appreciations I got, if I did one little thing the wrong way, it wasn't okay. It never was. Whenever it happened, I got punished. More than Draco when he did big mistakes or dumb things. 

I was just wanting to hear one thing and they wouldn't say it. They wouldn't even realise what I needed. Even my aunt and uncle, who were those who cared the most about me, didn't realise that. 

Chiara and Talbott congratulated me, but that was all. 

We spent the rest of the day watching over my sisters because Auntie Andromeda and Uncle Ted had to work. 

"They are so cute," Talbott said, making me smile. 

"Ery?" Sophia asked. 

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I'll be smart like you when I attend Hogwarts?"

"I don't know, Soph'. Why?"

"Because I want to."

"You know, Sophia, it isn't always good to be smarter than everyone."

"Why not?"

"Sometimes, it feels like it's a curse. Be smart, Sophia, but not as smart as I am. You might be leaving either your mental health or your childhood behind you in the process."

They all were looking at me, as if seeing me for the first time, but I just smiled.