Chapter Twenty- Eight

Jordyn's POV

The backyard looked like a scene out of one of those Pinterest boards A'ja used to scroll through late at night. The pastel balloons swayed gently in the warm breeze, the smell of barbecue lingered in the air, and kids squealed as they raced through the bounce house. It was Jonah's second birthday party, and like everything A'ja did, it was perfect.

I stood near the gift table, pretending to focus on organizing the stack of brightly wrapped presents, but my eyes couldn't help but wander to A'ja. She was laughing with Angel, her long arms draped casually over the fence as she watched Jonah toddle toward the swings. It had been two years since the breakup, but some days it felt like yesterday.

"Yo, you good?" Kahleah's voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

I turned to see her standing beside me, a plate piled high with ribs and mac and cheese in her hand. She was dressed in her usual laid-back style—ripped jeans, a cropped hoodie, and sneakers—and her braids were pulled into a loose bun.

"Yeah, I'm good," I lied, forcing a smile.

Kahleah raised an eyebrow and popped a rib into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully before responding. "Nah, you're not. What's up?"

I sighed, leaning against the table. "It's just...being here. Seeing her. It's harder than I thought it'd be."

Kahleah nodded, setting her plate down. "You still in love with her?"

The question hit me like a freight train, and for a moment, I couldn't answer. Finally, I shrugged, my gaze drifting back to A'ja. "I don't know. Maybe. Probably. Hell, yeah."

Kahleah smirked. "There it is. Took you long enough to admit it."

I glared at her, but she just laughed, throwing her arm around my shoulders. "Listen, you messed up, but you're not the only one. It's been two years. You're allowed to feel things. Just don't make it messy."

"Messy?" I repeated, narrowing my eyes.

"You know what I mean," Kahleah said, gesturing toward A'ja, who was now talking to a tall woman I hadn't noticed before. She had locs pulled back into a bun and a calm, confident energy about her.

"That her?" Kahleah asked.

"Her who?"

"The girl she's been seeing," Kahleah said, nodding toward the woman.

I swallowed hard, my chest tightening. "I guess so."

Kahleah studied me for a moment before nudging my side. "Come on, let's get some cake. You can brood later."

The sun dipped lower in the sky, casting a warm glow over the yard as everyone gathered around the picnic table for Jonah's cake. She sat in a little booster seat at the head of the table, clapping her hands and kicking her feet in excitement.

"Happy birthday to you..." the crowd sang, and I found myself unable to take my eyes off her.

She was the perfect blend of the two of us—A'ja's eyes, my nose, a smile that was all her own. She was our greatest creation, the one thing we got right in the mess of everything else.

"Make a wish, Jonah!" A'ja said, holding Jonah's tiny hands as they blew out the candles together.

The crowd cheered, and I clapped along, though my heart felt heavy.

Later, as the party wound down, I found Kahleah sitting on the porch steps, scrolling through her phone. I handed her a beer and sat beside her, staring out at the yard where Jonah was playing with Angel.

"You ever feel like you're looking for someone in all the wrong places?" I asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

Kahleah looked at me, one eyebrow raised. "Oh, this is about to be deep. Go ahead."

I rolled my eyes but continued. "I broke up with Maya last month."

Kahleah blinked, surprised. "For real? What happened?"

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "She wasn't A'ja."

Kahleah whistled low. "Damn, Jo. That's rough."

"I know," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. "But it's the truth. I was looking for A'ja in her, and it wasn't fair to either of us. Maya deserved better."

"So, what are you gonna do about it?" Kahleah asked, her tone serious.

"Nothing," I said quickly. "A'ja's moved on. She's happy, and I'm not about to mess that up."

Kahleah nodded slowly. "That's mature. Annoying, but mature."

I laughed despite myself. "Thanks, Kah."

As the last guests trickled out and the backyard grew quiet, I found myself lingering by the swings, watching Jonah. Was playing with Halo while Angel watched them.

"She's something else, huh?" A'ja's voice startled me, and I turned to see her standing beside me, her hands in her pockets.

"Yeah," I said, smiling softly. "She really is."

We stood there in silence for a moment, the weight of everything we didn't say hanging between us.

"Thanks for coming," A'ja said finally, her tone sincere.

"Of course," I said, meeting her gaze. "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

And for the first time in a long time, I felt like we were on the same page, even if we weren't in the same place.

The party was winding down now, the laughter and chaos replaced by the quiet hum of cicadas and the soft rustle of leaves. Jonah was still in Angel's arms, her chubby fingers clutching Angel's shirt as she dozed. I watched her, my heart swelling with a bittersweet ache.

"She looks just like you when she sleeps," A'ja said, her voice softer now, almost wistful.

I smiled faintly. "You think so?"

A'ja nodded, her gaze locked on Jonah. "Same little pout. Same stubborn grip when she doesn't want to let go of something."

The air between us felt fragile, like glass balancing on a tightrope. I wanted to say something, to bridge the gap, but the words caught in my throat. Instead, I watched as A'ja reached out to smooth a curl from Jonah's forehead, her touch so gentle it made my chest ache.

"She's got your laugh, though," I said finally.

A'ja chuckled, shaking her head. "Poor kid."

After a few more goodbyes and lingering hugs, the yard was empty except for A'ja, Angel, Kah, and me. Angel had Jonah perched on her hip, her long arms effortlessly supporting the toddler as she babbled sleepily. Halo had long wandered off into the house...probably to the play room she and Jonah shared in A'jas home.

"You ready to head out?" Kahleah asked, nudging me.

"Yeah," I said, standing and brushing off my jeans. "Actually, I was thinking...Jonah and I could head to New Orleans for a bit. Spend some time with my mom."

A'ja looked up at that, her expression shifting. "New Orleans?"

I nodded, forcing a casual tone. "Just for a few days. My mom's been asking to see her, and I figured now's as good a time as any."

A'ja hesitated, her jaw tightening slightly. "You sure you can handle her on your own?"

The question stung, but I kept my face neutral. "I've got it. She's my daughter too, remember?"

"Jordy," A'ja said quickly, her voice softening. "I didn't mean it like that. I just...she can be a handful."

"I'll be fine," I said, reaching for Jonah. Angel handed her over easily, and Jonah stirred briefly before settling against me, her head heavy on my shoulder.

"Call me if you need anything," A'ja said, her eyes lingering on Jonah.

"I will," I promised, though we both knew I probably wouldn't.

The drive home was quiet, Jonah's soft snores filling the car. My mind wandered as the city lights blurred past, memories of the day playing on a loop. A'ja's laugh, her careful touch, the way her eyes softened when she looked at Jonah.

By the time I got Jonah settled into her crib and collapsed onto the couch, the weight of the day finally hit me. I pulled out my phone, staring at Kahleah's contact for a moment before dialing.

"What now?" Kahleah answered, her voice muffled like she was eating.

"I just...needed to talk," I said, leaning back and closing my eyes.

"You're overthinking again, aren't you?" she said knowingly.

"Maybe."

Kahleah sighed. "Look, Jo, you did good today. You didn't cry, you didn't make it weird, and you even managed to have a real conversation with her. That's progress."

"I guess," I muttered.

"You're going to New Orleans. You'll get some space, clear your head, and figure out what you really want," she said firmly.

I wanted to argue, but I knew she was right.

Two days later, Jonah and I were on a flight to New Orleans. She was surprisingly well-behaved for a two-year-old, alternating between coloring in her little notebook and watching cartoons on the tablet A'ja had insisted I take.

When we landed, the humid Louisiana air hit me like a wall, thick and sticky. My mom was waiting at baggage claim, her face lighting up when she saw us.

"Look at my babies!" she exclaimed, pulling me into a tight hug before scooping Jonah up.

"Hello muffin. Oh granny baby getting so big. She looks just like A'ja my lord," she said with her smile so wide I found barley tell her eyes were open.

Jonah giggled, clinging to her grandmother like they were old friends. Watching them together, I felt a sense of peace I hadn't felt in a long time.

Over the next few days, I let myself relax. Jonah was in heaven with her grandmother, and I spent the time reflecting, journaling, and walking the familiar streets of my childhood.

One night, after Jonah was asleep, my mom sat me down at the kitchen table.

"You've got that look again," she said, pouring us each a glass of wine.

"What look?"

"The one you get when you're thinking about A'ja."

I groaned, burying my face in my hands. "Is it that obvious?"

"Sweetheart, you've been wearing that look since the day you met her," she said with a chuckle.

I sighed, swirling the wine in my glass. "I don't know what to do, Mama. She's moved on, and I'm...stuck."

"You're not stuck," she said firmly. "You're scared. And that's okay. But you've got to decide if you're going to let that fear keep you from fighting for what you want."

Her words stayed with me long after I returned to my room. As I watched Jonah sleep, her tiny chest rising and falling with each breath, I realized she was right.

I didn't know if A'ja would ever forgive me, but I owed it to myself—and to Jonah—to try.

For the first time in a long time, I felt hope.

Excuse all errorsAjah🤍