Chapter nine

Izzy's POV:

***

After getting ready I notice it's already 9:30pm and I'm going to be late if I don't leave home now. My thoughts ran in all different directions after texting Billie, therefore making time speed up until I pulled myself from distant memories and changed out of the towel I was still sitting on my bed in.

I grab my bag from the couch and opt not to pick up my clothes from earlier, not like anyone will see, I am sure Brian will be out tonight as per usual.

As the cold New York air hits my face, I hail a taxi, gaining a ride almost immediately.

***

I arrive at SNL set and see people walking out, they must've concluded filming for the day. Some stay behind and join the ever growing crowd.

I quickly shoot Billie a text to say I'm outside. I look up and notice the abundance of her fans lining the brick wall down the streets, all either wearing some sort of merch or posters held in front of them.

A black SUV pulls up to the front of the building and the fans all gasp or scream waiting for Billie to walk out the front door.

God this is such a different life than I am used too.

I notice a gentleman in a black suit walking towards me, I focus my gaze elsewhere, slightly feeling uncomfortable at his large demeanour.

"Miss Isabelle?" The man asks softly.

"Can I help you sir?" I felt as though being polite was the best option given I now see he has walked from the SUV.

"Ma'am, Miss Eilish has requested yourself in the car"

I don't answer as he has started to guide me towards the large SUV. The door is opened for me and I slide onto the seat.

I see Billie smiling back at me immediately.

"Hi pretty girl" she greets, making me blush.

"Hi" I reply getting myself more comfortable in the hard leather seat.

"You come out a back door? I think they were expecting to see you" I point out the window.

"Yeah" she giggles. "Underground car garage, I wanted to see you and that would've taken another hour or so" she answers my question.

I can't help but smile and her wanting to see me.

"We going somewhere?" I change the subject as the car takes off.

"Yes and no" she shrugs.

Why does this feel awkward

"I thought the same thing" she giggles softly

"Fuck did I say that out loud" I curse myself, making her laugh wholeheartedly.

Wow, I've missed that laugh. Her beautiful blue eyes lighting up as her smile shows her adorable dimples.

After all these years, and she still owns my heart.

"Stop staring bro" she lightly shoves my arms and blushes.

"Bro?" I question and raise my eyebrow.

***

Flashback:

"Nah bro, don't fuck with me you know we are watching it, you promised today at lunch" Billie said, her silver hair falling over her face as she sets her laptop down on her desk pulling up The Office.

I walk up behind her and wrap my hands around her waist, my cheek resting on her back.

"Bro?" I question.

"Oh fuck, did I say bro" she quickly turns around in my arms to face me.

"Yes, yes you did" I say with a smirk.

"No baby, wait" she begs but I give a devilishly smile. I poke her sides and start tickling her.

She screams and runs out of my grip and around the other side of the bed.

"Nooo Izzy I'm sorry" I laugh at her begging.

"Nope you know the rules baby girl. You don't call me bro unless you want me to actually only be your "Bro" " I air quote.

"You know you're not just a friend" she rolls her eyes at me as I climb onto the bed crawling over to the side where she is standing.

"Oh yeah? well you either let me tickle you or I act like your bro for the rest of the weekend and you get no kisses" I say sitting on my knees and pulling her closer to the bed by the hips.

I know she will give in, it's Friday night which means she won't get shit for the whole weekend ahead.

She huffs and blows out a cute little puff of air, moving the strands of silver hair from her face.

"Fine" she crosses her arms.

I pull her on to the bed and start tickling her again, her beautiful laugh is music to my ears.

"Okay mercy mercy" Billie yells as I straddle her hips and grab her hands pinning them above her head.

"Am I your bro?" I smirk

"No baby you're not" her fingers intertwining with mine as I loosen my grip on hers. We stare at each other, my green orbs soaking up her blue ones.

Billie pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, and I automatically clench my thighs together around her hips, feeling a usual hot pool of wetness start to flood my core, when she does that.

She removes her lip and smirks at my actions.

I press my chest down on top of hers and she removes one hand pulling me in by the back of my neck.

Our lips graze slightly, as we part them and our tongue sensually and slowly move together in what may be our most loving kiss yet.

The amount of butterflies I have in my tummy are enough to make me sick.

Our eyes flutter open and I rest my forehead on hers.

"Please never leave me Bil" I whisper.

"I only want this feeling with you". Tears build up in our eyes as we silently say the unspoken three words.

"Never" Billie commits.

***

Present day:

"I-" Billie stutters

"Sorry" I quickly blurt out, my palm going to my forehead.

"That was habit" I get mad at myself.

"It's okay" Billie replies, nodding softly.

Our eyes lock in a heated stare. I feel Billie moving closer to me, but I'm more focused on looking into her eyes, telling me how she feels.

Our fingers brush together and I feel tingles all over my body. The warmth she brings my heart will never feel normal to me. The electricity between us, we are like magnets.

My breathe hitches as I realise the proximity of our closeness.

Stay strong, stay strong

I lean my forehead against hers, and close my eyes at the feeling I haven't felt in so many years. I've been yearning for this feeling again every single day.

"Bil, I-" I whisper slowly opening my eyes, only to be met with her crystal blue ones staring back at me.

I single tear, sliding down her cheek.

My heart breaks all over again, into more than a million pieces.

"Why did you never reach out to me?" She chokes out.

Hot tears brim my eyes seeing her like this. I can't help but allow them to fall down my cheeks either. There are way too many to hold back.

Have you ever cried in a way that there is no noise? No sobs, no heavy breathing, just being so broken that tears fall without your mind knowing how to comprehend yet.

"Bil" I move my forehead off hers. I brush her tears away with my fingers, as she closes her eyes at my touch.

"You deserve better than me" I start and she rolls her eyes and scoffs in response.

"Please, hear me out" I plead.

"I thought you deserved better, and I still do. But-" I suck in a large amount of air, finally releasing my feeling that have been built up for four years.

"I never, ever want you to think that you weren't on my mind" I take her hands in mine.

Our eyes locked together again, tears still spilling down our cheeks in unison.

"Every single day, you consumed my thoughts. Billie, I loved you so much. I pictured a future with you, and I haven't been able to do that with anyone else" I tell her honestly. However, I shouldn't be using past tense because I definitely still feel all of that to this day and will always want her.

"To answer your question, I couldn't reach out to you. I saw all of what you've done with your life now and I didn't want to barge back into your new life and fame and pull you down with everything me and my family put you through. You have everything you've ever wanted" I stroke her cheek.

That's not the entire story, I don't think I want to dive into school life and everything that happened when I was ripped away from her. How we weren't allowed phones and only phone approved call a week, it's not going to change anything so why bother.

"No I don't have everything I've ever wanted" I give her a quizzical look.

"Isabelle, all I wanted was you".

Don't do it Izzy

Don't kiss her

***

A/N:

Well that happened!

What do you think, should Izzy kiss Billie? Or too soon?

Hope you're all good, don't forget to vote ❤️