I Can't Lose Her

MICHAEL'S POV ~ ~ ~ ~

I woke up in a white room, hearing beeping and a TV on. I had something in my mouth? I lifted my hand feeling what it was. Once I notice it was a tub i instantly started to panic.

"Wooow, Mike, calm down!" My brother Marlon said as a nurse came in.

Marlon and Tito held down my arms are i started having a panic attack! I had machines and tubs hooked up to me, what's going on? A couple nurses came in and removed my breathing tub. I tried talking but my throat was so dry. They gave me some water, i chugged it down.

"How are you feeling little bro? " Marlon asked.

" Whats going on? Why am I here? " I asked.

"We'll let mom, Joseph and the doctor tell yah."tito aid.

"Youre lucky to be a live. " Marlon said.

The doctor and my parents came in. Mom looked like a train wreck and Joseph looked disappointed & angry.

"What's going on? " I asked.

"Is there anything you want to tell us Michael? " Joseph asked. I shook my head

Confused.

"May i Joseph? " the doctor asked.

Joseph nodded.

The doctor came over checking my fluids.

"Michael I'm going to ask you a question and I need you to answer me honestly, okay?" He said.

"Okay." I said.

"Michael how long have you been on heroin?" He asked.

Everything froze, my heart started to race. This can't be happening. God please tell me this isn't true!

"Answer him Michael." Joseph said sternly.

I swollowed the lump in my throat.

"T-two years." I amswered. As soon as i amswered my mother began to cry.

"Your very lucky to be alive. Most people don't survive at that high of dose." The doctor said.

"Youre lucky Dre found you." Joseph added.

Oh my god! Dre! "Does she know? " I panicked.

"Yeah, she's the one who had to go back to the house to find your bag of supply." My mother said.

Tears swelled up in my eyes, "oh my god, she's gonna break up with me! Mom i can't lose her! Where is she? Is she here? " I asked.

"No she went home sweetie. " She said.

"Michael me and your parents and a rehab doctor had a very long discussion. You're going to be sent to a 2 week rehab then back to school. We would usually have you do 5 month rehab but with it coming to the end of your senior year, we cant. " the doctor said.

"When do I leave?" I asked.

"Tonight." He replied.

"Okay." I said.

Everyone left the room but mother. She still had tears in her eyes.

"Mom...I'm sorry." I said.

" What were you thinking? I thought I raised you better than this?" She asked.

"I don't know.... Tommy & Ricky were doing it....I tried to stop so many times but I couldnt...I'm so sorry mom." I said as a tear trickled down my cheek.

"How did I not know? I should have known Tommy and Ricky were bad! " she cried.

"Mom, don't beat yourself up about it. " i said softly.

"I can't even look at you right now." She said walking out.

Just when I thought thing couldn't get worst......

DRE'S POV * * *

These passed 2 weeks have been torture. I can't sleep half the time, i can't focus on my school, and Michael is coming home tomorrow. I have no clue what I'm going to do, cause we all know he's going to try to talk to me.

Erin keeps trying to talk to me as if we have some thing in common. She thinks because my EX-BOYFRIEND is a drug addict, her and I are suddenly BFF's . No.

I showered, and got ready for bed trying to mentally prepare my self for whatever tomorrow brings.

My phone buzzes.

Wesley: your gonna be okay. Be strong and keep your head up.

His text said. I smiled then put my phone down.

I laid down and tried to go to sleep.

*

After a restless night of sleep it was time to get up

I kept telling myself ' I am going to have a good day.'

I put on my white PINK brand pull over and black tights and black flats.

I went downstairs and ate breakfast with Riley and my mom.

"Why does your white pull over say pink if it's white?" Riley teased.

"Shut up." I growled.

"Hey you two. Be nice." mom warned.

"Dre, Wesley is here."Mom said.

I grabbed my bag and ran out side and jumped into his mustang.

"You look nice." He complimented.

"I'm determined to have a good day. I know i didnt pick the best day to but I am."

I smiled

"Right on!" He high five me.

Through the whole day no one said a word to me about Michael, which made the day easier. Everything went smoothly and it was a good day!

"I'll be waiting outside Dre." Wesley hollered.

"Okay!" I replied grabbing my books. I put my stuff in my book bag and zipped it up. Anna and i walked out of the school, as soon as we stepped out i heard her say , "oh shit." I looked up and i turned my ass back round and went right back into the school.

"Dre! Wait!" He hollered running after me. I ran faster, i ran into the girls bathroom, locking the stall door.

"This isn't happening this isn't happening." I told myself. The bathroom door opens and i can hear his shoes hitting the floor. Tears swell up in my eyes.

"Dre, i just want to talk. Please." He said desperately.

"Go away Michael. I don't want to see you!" I said.

"Dre... please...I need to talk to you. I need you as a friend." He begged.

"Nonono.No!I can't be your friend Michael.i cant! Leave me alone" I said sniffled.

"I'm not leaving this bathroom till you agree to talk to me. You're going to have to face me sooner or later." He said leaning his back against the wall.

"Fine..." i said unlocking the stall door.

I couldn't even look at him. "Will you please look at me?" He said softly.i shook my head as tears fell from my eyes as I squeezed them shut.

"Come on." He said pulling me out of the bathroom. I yanked my arm away from him. "Do NOT touch me!" I said

I couldn't look at him because either i saw the guy I fell in love with or him laying almost dead on the floor. I didn't want to see either of those guys.

"Where are you taking me?" I asked bitterly.

"Just for a ride so we can talk." He said. He walked me to the passenger side helping me in. Wesley walked over to the car on my side. Michael started the car and I rolled down the window.

"Can you cover for me?" I asked.

"I'll try but your mom always sees through my lies, you gonna be okay?" He asked.

"Yeah. So much for a good day." I half smiled.

"Well I'll let you two talk your guys shit out. It's good seeing you Mike. Don't do any stupid shit. She's my responsibility. " He giggled.

"Bye wes." He said.

Michael put the truck in drive and started driving down the highway.

"So your parents know." He asked.

"Just my mom.what was i suppose to tell her?" I said with a slight attitude.

" I don't know..... who all knows?"he asked.

"Wesley, Trey, Anna, Drake, Layla and probably Ally." I said wipping my face.

It was silent for about 5 minutes before he spoke again.

"I'm really Sorry Dre." He said sincerly.

I rolled my eyes looking out the window still.

"Are you sorry for being a druggie or just sorry I found out?" I said the attitude.

"Both.... I'm sorry for the way you found out, I'm sorry for hiding from you, I'm sorry I messed things up." He said.

I shook my head remembering that night tears streamed down my face again as he pulled into a parking lot at the beach facing the ocean.

"Do you have any idea how scarry it was finding you face first on the ground with blood and vomit all over you? " I choked out.

"Dre im-"

" don't Dre me! dont! You know i thought maybe you had a seizure or something. Maybe even some type of heart attack. But when they said they found insane amounts of heroin in your system, i told them it was a mistake. My boyfriend wouldn't EVER do that. So I went back to the house search your room up and down, then went into your closet to find it in your dresser draw. How could you! How could you do this! To yourself?your family? Your mom? Us? Me?I thought you loved me?" I cried finally looking at him. He had tears running down his face. I've never seen him cry before!

" I'm sorry. I tried stopping so many times for you, i did. But when I did I felt like I was going literally insane. I was bipolar, I'd get mad for no reason. There was no winning at that point...... I didn't know what to do. And I do love you. I love you so much Dre. And i know you still love me." He said as if he was trying to convince himself more than me.

"I don't even know you anymore! I have no idea who the real Michael Jackson is. Drugs change people, you've been on them since day one. So I don't know if i can say I love you." I said.

" Dont say that. Please don't say that." He said trying to hold back his tears.

" Its the truth. I did love you. But I don't even know you now." I said.

"Then get to know me. Dre i need you so much right now. My mom won't even look at me, Joseph just taunts me, none of my siblings will talk to Me. I need you. Whether it's as my friend or girlfriend. I need you by my side." He choked out hitting his steering wheel.

"I told you, i can't be your friend. " I replied.

" Then be my girlfriend and help me! I need your help! No one is helping me! " he cried. Oh no.....I could feel my heart giving in. He looks so broken and god knows I still love him. I don't want to be that stupid girl who keeps going back to her drug addict boyfriend but they say everyone deserves 2nd chances.....