chapter 29

a.n.// this is the end. so I neglected to put this in the last chapter, I'm sorry, but Niall does ultimately get taken over by cancer & ceases to be alive. I know this hasn't been the best fanfiction but thanks for reading it:) ily. xx, erin

*5 years after Niall's death*

I still think about Niall everyday. He's the reason I am who I am. In my lifetime, I've lost 4 people I loved. Mum, Niall, Louis, and I basically lost Dad. I wouldn't call my lifetime tragic, but I also wouldn't call it perfect by a long shot. My entire life was full of hurt until the little blonde Irish cutie came into my life and taught me how to be happy. I feel like he's watching over me.

I'm in the airport as of right now. I'mmoving to America. Britain just had too many memories. America will be the perfect place to restart. My plane will drop me off in New York City, and I'll pursue my occupation there. There's no doubt that I'll think about Niall everyday. I'm a writer now, just like he told me to be.

"You should be a real writer with that kind of mind, baby." he once told me.

"Baby," I look out the window once I'm on my plane,"I'm doing what you told me to."

I hate that cancer took over him. I hate that he's no longer alive to hold me when I have nightmares. I hate that he's no longer here to say he loves me. I was in the room with him when he took his last breath.

His last words were,"Macey Fayett, we've been through hell together, but through it all I've known one thing. I love you. Since the moment I saw you the day Zayn took us to McDonald's, you've been the love of my life. I've loved you...throughout all this confusion baby. I'm glad you're the last thing I'll see as a living being. I'll see you in the next lifetime my sweetheart."

I said,"I love you too, my little blonde baby."

I'm glad he didn't leave the world like Louis William Tomlinson, my other love, did. Niall was happy as ever when he died. He was so peaceful. I spoke at the funeral for him. His mum and dad came to England for it. The last time I had seen them was when Niall flew me to Ireland with him for his birthday. My speech at the funeral was this:"Niall James Horan. No amount of words could describe him. He was one of those people in which the only way to describe them was by name. 'ah yes, he's very Niall horan.' Niall was an amazing singer. I remember when he took me to karaoke night and sang a song called 'Nobody Compares' to me. that night he was worried about a waiter hitting on me... he didn't have a thing to worry about. I was truly, madly, deeply in love with him. Without him, I would most likely not be living right now. He's the reason I'm breathing as I am today. If you didn't personally know Niall James horan, you were missing out. I'm so happy I got to call him mine for the amount of time I did. If I told you everything of me and him, I think he'd be disappointed with me. The story of us is left only in us. Not only would he be disappointed, but you'd all be here for a very long while. I'm just going to say,' I love you Niall James. Thank you for teaching me to be happy. You'll always be in my heart, laughing. I love you more than life baby."

I'm working on a book right now. I began writing it a few years ago. It's basically my life, with different names. The book 'Confusion' will be published in a few months. I hope you read about Macey Grey Fayett and her journey and enjoy my story.