𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎

J A C K°

"You were right, Ahtohallan is amazing." I told Elsa as we walked together, waiting for Grand Pabbie to finish up the ritual he was talking about.

"Told you." She grinned widely. "It was more amazing than I remembered, specially now with all the new memories stored in there." She said, her eyes landing on the now iced, or should I say solidified, memory that we got from Ahtohallan.

"It somehow felt familiar yet new at the same time, if that makes sense." She giggled.

"Yeah, I kinda understand." I said.

As the sun began to set I can see her beauty radiate even more. The golden sunset and the faint glow from the ice served as the source that further highlighted her in my sight.

Her smile was gleaming.

"You seem excited." I commented.

"I am. If this works, we'll finally get Honeymaren back." She said, with hopeful eyes.

I smiled. "It'll work." I told her, following her gaze.

Still my mind was stuck in Ahtohallan. How everything was ice and snow yet it looked full of life.

The memories that echoed in the vast open space, I can still hear some of it. The joyous laughter, friendly banters, all the good happenings here in Arendelle and Northuldra. And all the bad too.

It's amazing how it can hold an entire history.

But I guess I'm just a little bothered.

I saw their history, but I should've been there in the recent memories. I knew which scenarios are where I had a play, but I didn't see myself.

I thought maybe it was a spirit thing.

But Elsa was there, so was Bruni and the Earth Giants. I wasn't seen. Ahtohallan didn't store memories of me. My physical form wasn't shown there.

And what bothers me most is that Ahtohallan didn't store fearlings either.

Am I seen the same way by Ahtohallan?

"Hey, I think it's time." Elsa spoke up, interrupting my train of thoughts. I felt her hand touch mine. I looked at our intertwined hands then to Elsa who was now giving me a grin.

"Alright, let's go there then." I told her. I returned the look to her before giving her hand a light squeeze.

We swiftly arrived at the circle that Grand Pabbie had prepared just around the borders of the protective field we had on the Valley of the Living Rock.

Aside from Elsa and I, there were only 3 other non-troll person as the audience; Anna, Kristoff, and of course, Ryder.

"Are we going to get my sister back now?" Ryder asked, excitement evident in his voice.

"Hopefully, but for now we'll have to wait and see if what we've gathered will successfully be used as bait." Grand Pabbie said.

"Bait?" Ryder asked.

"Bait." Anna repeated as she stepped forward, her eyes looked determine and as if ready for battle.

I followed her gaze and saw glowing eyes from a distance. It works.

"It's here." I heard Kristoff say, instinctively pulling his wife closer to him.

"Not to worry, we're save in here. It can't  go through the field." Grand Pabbie reassured. "We'll continue with the plan tomorrow, for now you should all rest." He added.

"Don't worry, we'll keep a close eye here. You all worked so hard grabbing all of this, it's our turn to do our job now." Bulda said proudly.

"Thanks. I am feeling a bit sleepy." Kristoff admitted.

"Alright big guy, let's get some rest." Anna said as they walked their way to the tent.

I saw Ryder standing still for a moment, walked to the direction of his tent, looked back for a moment, then continued on. Poor guy must be so worried by now.

"Your highness, we'll take it from here. You should rest too." Bulda said, which made me turn my attention to Elsa who was still standing beside me.

"She's right, you'll need to recharge your energy for tomorrow." I told her.

Elsa looked away, her attention on the spot we saw the glowing eyes.

"We're safe in here and-"

I felt her pull the end of my sleeve. I looked at her a bit confused. "What about you?" She asked.

At the corner of my eyes I could see Bulda qalking away from us backwards, her grin showing even though he tried to hide it with her hand.

"I-I don't really need sleep." I said. Why am I stuttering?

"I know but... I was thinking..."

"I'll stay with you if you want." I said, her head quickly turned and our eyes met. I could almost see her eyes twinkle.

"Really?" She said excitedly. She then cleared her throat and looked away once more. I chuckled as I noticed her ears turning really red.

"If that's what it'll take to make you turn in for the night." I said. "I don't really want you doing anything tomorrow without any sleep. That's really unhealthy." I told her.

"I was planning to take a nap either way." She argued.

"A nap won't be the same." I said as I began walking to her tent. She followed beside me.

"At least I rested, even for a bit." She said. Stubborn, this girl. I decided to just laugh it off because I know there's no point of arguing with her.

"Aren't you going to come in?" She asked, before she went in herself.

"Should I?" I asked her.

"Well..."

"If you don't mind then." I said following her, she just gave me a smile.

"Thank you." She said before sitting down on her make shift bed that's made out of blankets and a portion of a carpet we got from the Arendelle Castle. It was very long so they decided to cut it in to portions for everyone to have a piece.

I then sat down near the entrance. Elsa sighed and pulled me closer. "I didn't exactly ask you to come inside to be entrance guard you know." She said.

I just laughed. "Sorry, I just remembered from last time when I had to stay in you room too." I said.

She looked at me surprised. "Oh." She said. "Pfft, are you worried?" She laughed.

I simply shrugged, not knowing how to respond.

"Come here." She said patting the spot beside her. "I know you don't really need sleep but I was wondering-"

I didn't let her finish, I just stood up and set beside her. "Seriously, what is with you today?" I blurted out.

"I-I don't know. I just wanted to know how it felt I guess?" She said shyly. I looked at her confused, waiting for her to finish.

"I read a lot of books as a child, and till I got older. And as much as I don't want to admit it, I wanted to know how it felt too. To be with your lover." She said as she hugged her knees.

"And what suddenly brought this on?" I asked.

"I just wanted to be with you I guess." She muttered, even though the light is pretty dim here I know her face is flushed by now. I should know cause mine surely is.

My heartbeat felt crazy. Is this the feeling of being overjoyed?

I pulled her in for a hug but since she was hugging her knees she feel a little off balance and so did I. We ended up laying down, laughing at the outcome.

She sat up, grabbed her pillows and positioned it near my head. She then laid down and faced me.

The pillow was big enough for both of us so I rested my head there too. Elsa gave me a smile.

"This feels nice." She said.

"Yeah." I agreed.

For a moment I stared at her slightly pink face, then my eyes landed on her lips. I don't know why but I just stared leaning towards her, she was doing the same.

Then our lips met. Her lips are so soft. I felt her hand on my cheek and mine made its way to her waist.

This is a bit hard. I shifted myself so I was on top of her. The kiss continued, a passionate kiss that I don't think I'll ever experience again in my entire life.

Her hands were on my neck now, pulling me closer and deepening the kiss.

My mind is going in circles, I can't think straight. All that's on my mind is her. Nothing else, just her.

It almost feels like I'm being controlled, or rather I'm out of control. I don't know what to think anymore. My heartbeat is too loud for me to hear what is going on in my head.

Is this what kisses do to you? Is it just the kiss or is it because of her.

"Wait." I pulled away, panting as I tried to catch my breath. She too was panting heavily. Her face is flushed, and her eyes...

I chuckled and rested my forehead on hers. "My heart feels like it's about to burst." I laughed.

"Mine too." She said laughing along.

I took a deep breath before sitting up. "Alright, you're not gonna get any sleep if we continue on this." I said lying beside her.

She was oddly quiet, I expected her to laugh and agree. I looked over to her side and saw she was as red as a tomato. For a short moment I was confused until all that happened sinked in.

"Jack/Elsa-"

"Sorry-" again, we spoke at the same time.

"You go first." We both say, at this point we were just laughing again.

"Ladies first." I said, finally stopping the jinxing.

"Actually I forgot what I was about to say." She said. "What about you?"

I was about to say I'll be stepping out for a bit because I felt really embarrassed but right now I don't really want to anymore.

"I forgot too." I laughed. "Let's just sleep."

"I thought you didn't sleep?" Elsa raised an eyebrow.

"Well you do so might as well try it." I said closing my eyes.

Again I felt her soft lips on mine for a brief moment. "Goodnight Jack." She said.

When I opened my eyes, her eyes were already closed, her cheeks are still so red, and her smile never faded.

"Goodnight Elsa."

***

I don't really have dreams, or so I don't think I have them. I've never really "slept" before.

But when I woke up, the person beside me was squirming. I could feel her uneasiness as she shifted side to side, whimpering.

"Elsa." I called her, sitting up.

Her eyebrows were furrowed but her eyes were shut. She was shivering. A nightmare.

"Elsa, wake up." I held one of her shoulders to stop her from moving around.

"Elsa." I called her name once more but her eyes were still not opening. In fact, tears were already flowing down her cheeks.

"Elsa wake up it's just a dream." I said, by now I was holding both her shoulders. Shaking her lightly in hopes of waking her up.

"J-jack." I heard her mutter.

The dream is... about me? What kind of dream is she having? Why is she crying?

"Elsa." I called her once more, shaking her again.

"JACK!" Her eyes shot wide open as she sat up which took me by surprise. I leaned back a bit as a result.

She was panting. Beads of sweat formed all over her face, as well as the tears that still haven't stopped falling.

I cupped her face and wiped her tears away with my thumb. "It's okay, it was just a dream. I'm right here." I assured her.

Instead of stopping though, she cried even harder. I didn't know what to do. What exactly did she dream about?

"Elsa..." I said with the softest  voice I could muster.

She sniffed and used her hand to wipe her tears. "I'm sorry, I must've woken you up." She croaked.

"Why are you saying sorry?" I blurted out before pulling her for a hug. "You were having a nightmare and you're still apologizing?"

Again, I could hear her sobbing.

Damn it. Did I sound too harsh? Was I being harsh on her? It did sound like I was scolding her.

"It was just a nightmare right? This is real?" Elsa said in between her hiccups. I felt her hug tighten.

"Yeah, you're not in your nightmare anymore." I said. "Don't worry."

She didn't say anything. I stayed silent as well.

It was still dark outside. People were probably still asleep. It was a good thing Elsa's tent was considerably far from the others except for Anna's and from what I've heard, she and Kristoff are heavy sleepers. We shouldn't have to worry about waking anyone and making them think that there was an emergency.

After the silence Elsa pulled away, her tears finally stopped. Her breathing was still not steady but that's only normal when you just finished crying.

She looked down and took my hand, intertwined it with hers. I simply stared at her.

"You okay?" I asked, finally breaking the silence. She just nodded.

"Do you... wanna go back to sleep?" I asked, unsure. She did just have a nightmare, but after crying she must've felt tired.

She looked at me and leaned to rest her head on my chest. I sighed and pulled her for a hug. "Don't worry, I won't go anywhere."

I wonder if she can hear my heart beating.