Chapter Twenty-Five

"Ren!" Zuko exclaimed, surprised when I sat down at a table in the tea shop. "What are you doing here?" My grandson was standing there awkwardly, as he stared at me, one of his hands played with his apron, the other holding a tray of tea.

"Mushi invited me for dinner, I thought I'd walk home with you two." I said, sending him a smile. He didn't reciprocate, instead, he nodded stiffly and turned back to the kitchen without serving the customers.

I sighed, did he really feel that awkward around me? Had I actually been that absent in his life that I was a stranger? Despite travelling together for the last month and a half, as Iroh healed, Zuko had mostly avoided me. I'd tried to engage with him, teaching him to redirect lightning, trying to ask him about his travels, about his training, anything... but he was evasive and awkward.

I sat at the table, drinking Iroh's delicious tea and watching my son and grandson work. It was a quiet evening, and I got talking with a few other customers. I began to smile, forgetting my worries about Sokka's plans to see the Earth King, Zuko and my relationship, and my upcoming death. But, my peace was interrupted when an angry teen carrying two hook swords stormed into the establishment.

"I'm tired of waiting!" He yelled, interrupting the men who had been praising Iroh's tea. "These two men are firebenders!" It was the boy from the ship, I don't think I'd ever learned his name. I stood abruptly, ready to defend my family, and his eyes snapped to me. "And her too!" My brow crinkled. I hadn't even firebent since before we got on the ferry, I'd even heated water with fire from spark stones instead of bending. What evidence did he have? "I know they're firebenders! I saw the old man heating his tea!" Well, that's bad evidence against someone working in a tea shop... and the other customers thought so too.

"Drop your swords, Boy." A soldier demanded, standing up beside me. The teen didn't listen, instead, he and Zuko began to fight. As Zuko pulled the soldiers' swords from their hilts, using them as dual swords against the boy, I made my way over to Iroh.

"What happened?" I asked, he just shrugged.

"I don't know, I haven't seen him since the boat." He answered, and we ran outside as the fight moved. "Please, son! You're confused, you don't know what you're doing!" He yelled, but neither Zuko nor the other boy were paying attention.

A crowd had gathered now and I was becoming worried. What if someone recognized us from the wanted posters, or what if Zuko was forced to bend? I decided to step in. 

I grabbed the teapot, which sat on Iroh's serving tray. It was already steaming hot, so no one noticed when it got a little hotter, nearly boiling. I ran up and smashed it on the boy's head. He screamed loudly and fell backwards into the fountain. The stunned crowd watched on as he tried to plead his case to the DaiLee agents arresting him, but luckily, no one listened.

"I didn't know you'd learned a new form of martial arts." My son chuckled as Zuko and I watched the boy be taken away. I turned to him, confused, as did Zuko. "Tea-jitsu, a truly potent blend of skills." He laughed at his own joke, and I smiled, though Zuko just rolled his eyes.

–

"Tell me about this one." Sokka requested, as we sat together in the large bath I'd bought for my apartment a few days prior. He had been asking me about my scars, running his hands across their ridged edges and kissing each one individually as I kept the water temperature up.

"Hmmm, I believe that one is from a mishap I had with a sword once. I fell over and nearly impaled myself. Not my proudest moment." I admitted with a chuckle, placing my hand on top of his own as he traced the faint line back and forth. "Swords and I really just don't seem to get along."

He hummed to himself and then laughed. "It's nice to know that you weren't always an almighty warrior."

"Hmmm, yes. It took me years to perfect my bending, my hand-to-hand combat, as well as my weapon skills. You're honestly a prodigy." When he laughed, I shook my head, turning to face him in the small tub. "You learned to throw a boomerang by yourself and perfected it. You're an incredibly fast learner, and you work hard. You're incredible, Sokka, I'm not just trying to flatter you. With the proper teacher, you could go far."

"If only you were a sword master," Sokka joked, and I shrugged bashfully.

"I wish you could meet Piando." I told him, kissing each of his knuckles as he admired me.

"Who's that?"

"He's a friend, and an amazing swordsmith and swordsman. Truly one of the best I've ever come across." I explained, thinking about the man who I hadn't seen in a few years now.

"Could you introduce us?" Sokka asked, lighting up a bit in excitement. But he deflated a bit when I shook my head.

"He's in the Fire Nation, and lives in the country. It's a beautiful spot, out of the way and undisturbed by politics more than most places in the Nation now. But, hardly reachable while you're with Aang, maybe after The War, you could find him, but until then...if it even happens."

"Hey, don't talk like that." Sokka reprimanded, "Aang can do this, I believe in him." I sighed, looking away. Sokka leaned forward and kissed my shoulder where there was a small scar peeking out from my hair. "Where's this one from?"

"Sparring, I think. I'm not sure." I shrugged. "A lot of the small ones are kinda forgetful."

"What about this one?" He was touching the worst one, a rigid and pale pink line that ran from between my breasts to my belly button, I flinched. "I'm sorry, you don't need to..." I cut him off.

"No, it's okay. It's just a bad memory." I began to explain, slowly at first, trying not to cry. I told him about Wei and the circus. I explained how we'd been attacked, caught between the two sides of The War. I narrated our escape, how I had dragged my boyfriend across the desert until I thought we'd been rescued. I took a deep breath then, not sure if I could continue. I'd never told anyone this, not even Azulon. But then, I looked up at Sokka, his eyes holding worry, sadness and understanding, not even a hint of fear or judgement, and I continued. "The woman, Akna, was a blood bender. She forced Wei to kill me, and when I came back, she made him do it again, and again. It became a game for her. We spent days there, being tortured." I took another shaky breath, my heart hurting and tears on my cheeks. "She figured out my curse pretty quickly and did her best to continue to mutilate me more each time–or, I guess, to get Wei to mutilate me more. Eventually, he took his own life when she left the room. She made sure that this wound never killed me, and so it would scar each time I came back, scarring worse every time." He was silent for a while, and so was I. I didn't want to talk about how I got out of there, how I'd scrambled through a window, bleeding and near another death. I'd left the other prisoners behind, they hadn't even registered in my mind with the adrenaline coursing through my veins. And I would forever regret it. Their horrified movements when Akna neared them were evidence enough that I wasn't her only play thing.

"That's why you wouldn't let anyone heal you, why you didn't want me to get Katara." Sokka realized, and I nodded, even if I had wanted to respond, I couldn't. I was crying too hard. "I'm so sorry you went through that." He held me in the tub, long after the water had become cold and I shook with sobs. Eventually, I realized Sokka was crying as well and I wiped his tears.

"Please, Baby, don't cry for me." I told him, sniffling.

"I think I love you, Ren." He told me, still sniffling. I laughed despite my pain and my tears and kissed him deeply.

"I think I love you too." I told him.

–

"What in the world does your sister think you do all day, hmm?" I asked Sokka as we cuddled on my bed in the early afternoon.

"Hmmm, she probably thinks I'm staring at myself in a mirror or something." He mumbled, grinning at me as he pressed his lips against mine, his hands wandering up my dress.

"All day?" I questioned in confusion. "She can't believe you're that shallow." I said rhetorically.

He shrugged, "She's honestly a little self-centred sometimes. Doesn't really care what I do, so long as I'm out of her sight. I'm pretty sure she thinks all I care about is food and my boomerang."

"I'm sure she loves you, she might just struggle to show it." I tried, but he just laughed.

"She told me to get lost this morning when I tried to help cheer Aang up." I shook my head. Hopefully, she'd learn to appreciate her brother as she got older, after all, she was only 14.

"Ren?" Zuko's voice broke me from my thoughts, and I froze for a moment. Sokka's eyes widened.

"Is that-?"

"Get in the bathroom!" I whispered to him, standing quickly and righting my dress and hair in the mirror.

"Ren, are you home?" Zuko asked loudly through the door. Sokka was still staring at me, he hadn't moved.

"Bathroom! Now!" I whisper-yelled, pushing him into the room and closing the door. "One second." I called out to my grandson, tidying my bed and tossing Sokka's shoes and boomerang into the bathroom after him. He still looked shell-shocked.

When I opened the door, I had to hold in my laugh as Zuko stormed into the room. His hair was slicked down, and he wore his nicest earth-kingdom clothes. "What's going on?" I questioned, shutting my apartment door and hoping Sokka decided to stay hidden in the bathroom.

"I'm going on a date." He stuttered out, pacing around my small room.

"Oh, what's her name?"

"Gin."

"Ok, umm..." I didn't know what to say. What did he want me to say?

"What do I do?" He asked loudly, finally stopping to look at me. I stared at him, still unsure of what he wanted. "What do I say?" I gave him a soft smile and sighed.

"First, Darling, you need to relax." He huffed loudly, and steam came out of his nose. I chuckled, and he glared, "Just be yourself, Zuko." I walked up to him and ruffled his hair, letting it sit back in its normal place.

"It took Uncle 10 minutes to do my hair." He complained, and I rolled my eyes.

"Your Uncle hasn't dated anyone in years, he's a little out of the times. This looks better, trust me." Zuko looked in the mirror and nodded, finally relaxing. "You'll be fine, Darling."

"Thank you, Nanna." He said softly, and I smiled at the name I hadn't heard from him since he was a small child.

"Can I ask you a question?" I queried, he nodded, and I took a breath before speaking. "Why did you come to me? Why not stay with Iroh?"

Zuko looked away from me, "You were always closer to Azula. It's just weird I guess... I feel like you've been a mentor to everyone in the family, but me. I guess I wanted that too." He admitted, and I frowned.

"I'm sorry, Darling. I love you, just as I do your sister. I always wished I could be closer to you, but your Father kept you from me a lot during your youth. He was mad-" I tried to explain, but Zuko cut me off.

"You're going to blame Dad!"

"Zuko, please try to understand-"

"No!" He snapped back at me, shaking his head. "This was stupid, I shouldn't have come to you!" He turned, and before I could say anything, he slammed the door in my face. I stood there for a moment, staring at the door and regretting the hurt I had put Zuko through, when the bathroom door opened behind me, and Sokka came out.

"He's here?! He's in BaSingSe!"

"Not right now, Sokka." I shook my head, holding back my tears. "I can't-"

"He'd tracked us all over the globe, and now he's here, and you didn't say anything!" He snapped, grabbing my shoulder to turn me around. Instead, I did it myself, spinning to face him, tears on my cheeks and a glare on my face.

"Don't blame this on me! I may not have said his name, but I told you I'd been travelling with them, and you knew Iroh was in town!" I shot back, he'd paused when he saw my tears but now he spun around himself and began pacing. The sounds of both of us breathing heavily filled the space, and I sniffled, trying to stop my tears.

"Does he know we're here? Did you tell him?" Sokka asked, his eyes narrowed at me.

I scoffed, "Really? You think so low of me?" He looked a little guilty at that, his eyes downcast. "Of course not, Sokka! Zuko has no idea you, or anyone else, is here, I've made sure of it. He's not even hunting Aang right now, he's going on a date for Spirit's sake!" He was quiet for a minute and I walked over to the kitchen.

I pulled at my hair, stressed and upset. I tried to breathe, I couldn't lose control right now. I need some water. As I filled a glass with cool water from my icebox, the slick cup slipped from my hand and smashed on the floor. "Damn it." I muttered, trying to pick up the pieces and pricking my finger. I gave up, leaving the shattered glass on the floor and leaning against the counter, trying to breathe in and out evenly. I could feel the energy in my body trying to escape, pent-up emotions wanting to break out and shatter the world around me. But I just barely kept it together.

"Ren," Sokka said, walking into the room slowly. I didn't answer, keeping my eyes closed, and my back to him, focusing on my breathing. "I'm sorry, you were right. I was just mad that he almost saw me, you never hid it from me. I shouldn't have gotten mad." I still didn't respond, but I did turn to look at him. I'd stopped crying, but I was still upset. Mostly because my grandson hates me, though, not because of Sokka. "Are we okay?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry." I sighed, "We're fine. I'm just disappointed, I didn't realize how far I'd been separated from Zuko."

"Well, I might not see anything redeemable in him..." Sokka shrugged, walking towards me. I sent him an annoyed look, still, he continued. "but, I know that you are amazing and that you love your family despite their obvious faults. And, if he doesn't see that, he's an idiot." I rolled my eyes at his blatant dislike of my family (not that I blamed him), but I was happy that Sokka wasn't mad anymore. He wrapped his arms around me in a hug, and I smiled.

"Thank you," I said, leaning into him.

"I love you." He whispered, kissing my temple.

"I love you, too."