~Chapter 13~

Huh, I think I wrote this chapter!

Things were not ok. It had been two months since the church fire. Johnny had died. Dally had died. I think a bit of me died too when Johnny did. I told the gang at Johnny's funeral, then I broke down cryin'. The night Johnny died I told Soda. We share a bed, I woke up cryin' from a deam about Johnny. In the dream we were siting on the steps of the church, in the sun. When I woke up I looked arround for Johnny, thinking the were still at the church. When I only saw Soda lying next to me it brought me to tears. I just started bawling. Soda woke up and herd me cryin' and asked me what was wrong. I spiled the whole story to him. My crush, the church, the kiss... The kiss. That kiss and all that followed. How I had never gotten to take him on a date, how I had never gotten to go to a movie with him as my boyfriend. How Johnny could never come to Pony's track meets as his boyfriend. All the things then could never do as boyfriends. When thinking back to all those months that he had a crush on Johnny; of all the times he could have asked Johnny out, all of the nights they could have spent together under the stars in the lot- he felt... Sad, but hopeful at the same time. I could go out and do all of the things he wanted to do with Johnny, for Johnny.

I took a breath. I put down my pen, closed my journal, and stood up. I stretched my back and took another breath. I looked at the picture of Johnny that I have over my desk.

"Love you Johnnycake."

I kissed my fingers and touched them to the picture's lips.

"Love you."

I walked out of my and Soda's room to the kitchen. Darry was at the kitchen table working on his College essay, and Steve and Soda were Cudaling on the couch. Sometimes when I look at Steve and Soda I feel sad, I had hoped that that would one day be me and Johnny.

"Hey, Ponyboy," Soda said, looking up.

"Hi, Soda. Hi Steve."

Steve grunts, rolling over to Soda.

"I'm going to the park, see ya," I said as I was walking out the door.

"Be home by four," Dally yells, Two-Bit is coming over at five for his birthday- we are going to surprise him."

"Okay."

As I walked to the park I faced the open sky, Johnny's spirit echoed in the wind. I think of his last words to me,

"Stay gold ponyboy, stay gold."

Have I stayed gold? Did I do a good job, Johnny?

Nothing but the wind answers me.

THE END

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Thank you all for reading my fic, if means so much to me that you all liked it so much that you made it all the way to the end!

-Hazel ✨

(Ps. Thanks for dealing with all my typos and bad spelling!)