15) Complicated feelings

Previous chapter summary:Izuku goes to Kacchan's house for a sleepover. It.. doesn't go too well as Mitsuki notice many changes that have happened in Izuku's behaviour.Two months later, in a parents' and Teacher's conference, Izuku's teacher also mentions his changed behaviour to his parents. She puts an essay written by Izuku on the table.Now...___________________________________________

T: "All right kids! Your homework for today is to write a two page essay on the topic: "People I Love". It can be your Idol, your parents, your best friend or any person you really love! Don't hold back at anything and write your mind ok?"

"Class is dismissed"

Izuku bid Kacchan goodbye with a 'smile' on his face as he sat in Haru San's car.

Haru: "How was school today?"

Izu: "It was good..."

Haru: "That's nice. Did you make sure to keep smiling?"

He rarely ever felt like smiling anymore.. yet he made sure to keep his lips curled.

Mama loved his smile after all.

Izu: "Yes.."

Haru: "Good job buddy! Mama would be soo happy!"

Izuku didn't reply to that. He didn't know anymore if uncle was speaking the truth..

Haru: "Oh yeah.. it's training day today!"

Izuku buried his head in the All might plushie papa gave him. It had Papa's scent. He didn't like training days..

It had been almost 1.5 months since the first training. After that many more men had come to help him train.. and each was scarier than the previous.

They hurt him.. did wierd things with his body..

Yet.. uncle always said that it's for making him strong aand so that mama would love him. But he honestly didn't understand how.

Izuku held the All might plushie close to his him as he looked out the window. A few moments of calm before the training began.

Papa had stopped calling as frequently as earlier since the last three weeks. He would only call him every 3rd or 4th day now.. the conversations would be short and papa hadn't even met him once in that time.

He was starting to get homesick... He hadn't seen his house for a month..

He wanted to return back... To his old life.. to before he ever turned 7 and learned about the truth of his quirk..

He was smiling.. but he didn't want to smile.

They reached home and Izuku quickly changed into casual clothes.

He laid down on the bed hugging the plushie with tears in his eyes.. calling his papa again and again..

His heart skipped a beat in dread as the door to his room creaked open.

He immediately put the plushie away and stood up with his head down.

A man came through.. unknown like always..

As Haru san had taught, Izuku greeted the man warmly with a welcoming smile.

And that's when... The man started with him.......Izuku had a trick to this endurance thing.. whenever the person would do something that hurt Izuku, he would think of things that made him happy.. like dreaming about mama hugging him and praising him for being a good boy.

But today... He was thinking about his homework..

"People I Love" he whispered to himself as the man ran his hand through Izuku's shirt.

I love mama the most... I can do anything for Mama..

Izuku kept smiling.. even as the man choked the life out of the kid.

Mama loves my smile. She said that when I was 4 years old. I always smile when Mama is nearby so she can be happy!

It hurt.

Papa said that Mama is a Wizard.. when I grow up, i want to be a wizard like Mama too! It doesn't matter if I don't have a suitable quirk.. I'll make it happen because I love mama..

He couldn't breathe.. He wanted to be away from here..

Mama is beautiful.. and she is very talented! She is a very big lady in her company! She makes costumes for Heroes!

The man told Izuku how cute and talented he was. Izuku didn't really like that compliment..

I can do anything in the world no matter how painful or sad for Mama.

The disgusting taste washed over his mouth.. he wanted to throw up.. but he knew that the man wouldn't be very happy at that.. finally ..It was over..

The man smiled at him while putting his belt back on and left the room without a word.

Izuku remained there wondering if the essay would be good enough. If there's at least one thing he would be good at.

___________________________________________

Inko and Hisashi read the short essay dedicated to the woman.

Hisashi was a little surprised that Izuku harbored such feelings for Inko even after all that has happened.

Inko felt.. surprised.. she had never expected Izuku of all people to feel that way about her. She honestly hadn't though much of him earlier.. and she couldn't remember ever telling him anything about his smile... But it wasn't like she hated it..

Izuku had a pretty smile and it was one of the things that made him stand out in the photoshoots.

She was definitely flustered after reading the essay.

T: "I know that the essay looks innocent in what it is but... I can't help but overlook the slight darkness in his words.. can you feel it too?"

H: "Yes.. the last bit about painful things.. is.. a little concerning.."

T: "Please do talk to him about this. I wish that Izuku can return to his cheerful self once again."

H: "I will make sure of that. Thank you Mam."

They left.

Inko was staring out of the window, as trees passed by.. thinking about nothing.. but Izuku.

His essay.. and his behaviour.

Wait.. why was he still living with Hisashi's friend?

Shouldn't he be well enough by now?

She was embarrassed to ask this to Hisashi.

The whole ride.. all that she could think of was her son.

___________________________________________

Inko was laying down in bed at night time. She had a flashback.

Izu (4 yrs): "Mama!! I got you shumthing!"

I: *working* "Not now Izuku. I'm busy."

Izu: "But Mama look!"

I: "I said I'm busy Izuku. Leave it on the table."

Izu: "But.."

I: *smacks her hand on the table* "I said. Leave."

Izuku left at his mother's command.. shedding a few tears of frustration as he went.

After an hour, Inko got off her work and starting exiting the room when she looked at the table. It was a folded paper.

She opened it up. It was a drawing titled Mother's Day. The drawing showed what looked like a woman working on a computer , wearing a suit. On her side was a small boy holding a banner with the words : "Besd Mom In The Vold"

The drawing was awarded an A+.

As the flashback faded, Inko opened her room's drawer where all of her old things were kept. Rummaging through its contents , she took out a familiar paper and looked at it.

The same drawing.

It was of the same level as any other kid his age... But..

It was really good. Maybe she should've complemented him..

She shook her head to get rid of such thoughts and put the drawing back in its place before rushing to the bed again.

I: "He's just a nuisance. He's starting to distract me from my life now."

She murmured to herself and went to sleep.

___________________________________________

It had been one week since the PTC.

For some reason, the happiness that Inko had was starting to dwindle.

The house, which seemed so happy and dreamy with just she and her husband, a few weeks ago..starting to seem.. dull and empty.

She remembered the Izuku's happy laughter when he came from school.. his painful cries whenever he had a sudden attack.. his intense murmuring at breakfast whenever he was really interested about something and would keep speaking of it..

When he ran around the house in excitement whenever he had a sleepover at Mitsuki's..

All of this that previously seemed so annoying to her... That she wished for it to just stop.

Now that it was gone... She was starting to realise that it was a part of her life.. she was starting to... Miss.. all of it.

She didn't love Izuku but she wondered.. why did she ever even hate him to begin with..

Why did she ever hate him for his disabilities when she was the cause of them herself..

Why did she never pay attention to him.. even though he gave all his attention to her..

Why did she ever wish to get rid of him.. while Izuku had always loved her..

She didn't know.. she was confused.. and she didn't want to tell Hisashi about it.. she was embarrassed.

___________________________________________

It was a week before Christmas. Inko had had enough. She wasn't sure about her feelings for that kid. Did she hate him or not. She wanted to find out.

It had been over 2 months since she had even seen him.

Hisashi was to go with Izuku to a nearby shrine today for his homework.

As soon as he left, Inko put on concealing clothes and shades and left home, taking a taxi. She followed Hisashi to a bus stand where.. Izuku was standing.

She couldn't see him properly so decided to follow them even further.

At one point, she lost sight of them and had to try finding them and even injured her finger on a stone pillar.

But once she did... She was happy she came here.

There he was.. Izuku. Her son. With his eyes closed, praying in front of the donation box, beside Hisashi.

But.. there was something different.. he had gotten much thinner.. his eyes had.. eyebags?? At such a young age?

And also.. his face void of all happiness.. as if she had never seen him smile before..

Exactly what even happened to him.. that caused his state to worsen so much...

Izuku and Hisashi got down and started going away and Inko, in her disguise turned back and started going back to..

When suddenly, someone tugged at her coat. She flinched and looked back and to her utter shock, it was Izuku.

He started at her for a while in confusion and just before Inko could speak he showed her a bandaid.

In an altered voice, she spoke trying to hide her true identity

I: "H-hello! Unknown Kid.. uh.. what's... That?"

Izu: *smiling and talking weakly* "It's a bandaid! Nee-San's finger is hurt so.."

(Nee-San = a way to refer an older (young) woman. Conventionally : big sister)

I: T-thanks! Kid.."

Izu: ".. is Nee-san's throat okay..? I have some lozenges if you want..."

I: "No thanks kid! Its.. my normal voice!"

"I'll be going now!"

But just before she turned to go back, she noticed a bruise on the kid's head near his eye.. it seemed like it hurt.

She asked Izuku about the bruise and he told her that it was from tripping.

I: "Does it still hurt?"

Izu: *nods* "a lot!"

I: "Then why are you still smiling..?"

Izu: *smiling even brighter* "For Mama! Mama loves my smile! And so I keep smiling!"

Inko couldn't respond to that.

H: "IZUKU! WHERE ARE YOU?"

Izu: *turns back* "Here papa! I'm just giving a bandaid to this nice Onee San!"

But as soon as Izuku turned back, she had already dissapeared.

As Inko ride the taxi back home, looking at the bandaid her son have him.. she had made up her mind on what she had to do...

___________________________________________+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++--------------------------------------------------------------End of chapter.No. Of words: 1964

The next chapter has.. whats probably one of the most important parts of the whole story.

So don't miss that one!