Full of Secrets (Niall Horan Fanfic)

(A/N: This is probably my 6th story of One Direction)

Chapter 1 :D

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Lacy's POV

 "Why do you even still live?" A girl shoved me against a locker in the girl's locker room. Gym had just ended and now it's time for another bully session.

"Can't you...just leave me alone?" I pleaded, not facing her direction, I didn't want to let my tears fall again, she gets more angry when that happens. She's like the Queen Bee of this school, the top dog, very top of the list. Her name is Leigh-Ann, her fake hair, and tan gets on my nerves. She can't ever be true to herself.

"And what's the fun in that?" Leigh-Ann scoffed, twirling a long piece of her bleach blond hair around her orange-y colored finger.

"Oh, this girl again?" One of her back up girls came around the corner, I swear, their outfits get sluttier each day. This girl's name is Diana, she's the second most popular behind Leigh-Ann, her nails were longer than my pinkie. She gets a new pair about every two weeks. I couldn't imagine wearing those. They're so ugly.

"Yeah, she's so hideous, like, how can we even have her around here anymore." Leigh-Ann rolled her eyes, grabbing a piece of my hair, pulling it above us, then letting it fall.

"Her hair is so stringy, ugh, you're so ugly." Diana put on a disgusted face. Why does this happen to me...all of the time?

"I...can I just go...home?" I stared up at them, yes up, only because they have on five inch heels, one day they'll just break, and then their ankles will break. Oh how tragic...note my sarcasm.

"Hm, I'll let Alex deal with you." Leigh-Ann scratched my arm as she roughly grasped it in her hands, tugging me along. My backpack was hitting one side at a time, she was rushing out to the back of the school. This is where all of the jocks and cheerleaders are, they're honestly scary.

"Please!" I pleaded, seeing that everyone's eyes were gazing at me, soon their mouths turned into smirks. On no.

"Ha, just deal with it." Diana ripped off my backpack, tossing it down the concrete steps that we were about to walk down.

I tried tugging my arm out of both of their grasp, but they only held on tighter. I screamed out in pain, the feeling of their nails digging in my skin is like alcohol dripping in a fresh cut. Yeah, it hurts.

"Ahem, Miss Williams, Miss Marvel, let Miss Serene go. What are you girls doing anyways?" One of the gym teachers, Mrs. Burns had her hands sitting on her hips, her dark blue track suit on.

Leigh-Ann and Diana quickly let go of my arms, I felt relief blow over me, I hurried to grab my stuff, but one of the football players grabbed it, and ran across the field.

"EXCUSE ME, MR. THOMAS! YOU BRING THAT BACKPACK UP HERE RIGHT NOW!" Mrs. Burns yelled to the top of her lungs, making me flinch at the sound of her voice, the other girls just let out an angry sigh, crossing their arms over their chest. Oh yeah, let me tell you how they've both gotten boob jobs, yeah, totally fake. It disgusts me.

The football player tossed the backpack at me, I almost fell back with the force of his throw towards me, but I managed to stay up right.

Leigh-Ann and Diana both let out a chuckle, turning away from me, great. They're going to both go get ready to go to cheer practice, but Diana is the cheer captain surprisingly, but then again, Leigh-Ann cheers for two teams, this one, and another somewhere else.

"I'm sorry, Miss Serene, you may go home now." Mrs. Burns apologized, walking past me, and grabbing a football that had been thrown towards us.

I nodded, hurrying with my stuff, and escaping the school into my car. I sighed, slamming my hands along the steering wheel. This happens to me way to much in my life. What did I ever do to anyone? I wish someone would answer that question because I'm still clueless about it.

"Hey mom, I'm home!" I told her, running up our stairs, and into my room.

"Hi honey! Did you have a good day?" 

"Yes!" I shouted back to her, then locking my door. I tossed my things on my bed, grabbing my diary that I kept under my mattress. Time for another day to add.

Dear Diary,

        The bullying does not stop today, it only gets worse. When I think it only is going to get better, everything goes downhill. Sometimes I want to just dream and never wake up, then other times I just want to get enough courage to stand up to the bullies, but you know, that's not going to happen. I get so much hate that I'm starting to believe all of it. I'm called 'ugly' and 'hideous' about three times a week. Today I've gotten shoved against a locker, thrown out towards the jocks and cheerleaders, and one of the football players tried to take my backpack. Mrs. Burns helped me...even though that'll only make everything terribly wrong for me now, everyone will think that I need someone to always help me, that I tell on them for all of this. That I'm not strong enough to take it on my own. Well the thing is...is that I'm going to try and be stronger, yes I've said this before, but I need to sort things out. I'm tired of everything, all of this, and having to go through it. I have no friends, I have no boyfriend, and I have no one to tell all of my secrets and problems. I'm a worthless nobody.

- Lacy x

I sighed, pushing it back under my mattress. I'm sick of this. I can't keep cutting on my hips, it's wrong. I hope my brother never finds out, I don't want him at my age thinking that's all right to do this or to go through this, or to even treat people like this. He's only 14 and I'm only 16, sometimes he wants to be the kind of brother to protect me, but I never let him.

Is this the time to explain who I am? I think so, my name is Lacy Serene, just Lacy Serene, I have no middle name, that's a little uncommon, I agree. I'm 16, I have long, brown, wavy hair, I have hazel eyes, I'm really skinny, kids at school like to take my food...or just my money. I'm 5'5, that's average for me. I've cut...about six or seven times. Some things get to me too badly.

Twitter. I need to check Twitter.

I don't care for my homepage...mentions, yes.

Leigh_AnnBBy: @LacySerene you are too worthless for your own good.

Retweeted 41 times, Favorited 64 times.

My hands were shaky as I looked at the people who retweeted and favorited, my breathing wasn't the same, it was different. I grabbed my keys off of my computer desk, and slipped on my Vans, hurrying out of the front door without any explanation.

I pushed the power button on my radio in my car, letting the music blast, and the bass kick in. I had no clue what song this was, but I found myself get a little calmer with the sounds of it.

I parked on the side of the road, turning down my radio, seeing that I have about 50 more notifications on Twitter... I got out of my car, walking around towards the brick building, sliding down against it to the point where I'm sitting down. I let myself continue reading all of the tweets.

DDianaXX: @Leigh_AnnBBy @LacySerene isn't she? I mean she's useless to the world, why do we need her?

Retweeted 39 times, Favorited 55 times.

AlexIsHot95: @LacySerene you really think you have friends? You think you can get teachers to help? It doesn't always turn out the way you want.

Retweeted 85 times, Favorited 102 times.

I let the tear drops fall onto my phone, but I hurried to wipe them off of the screen so I could continue reading through them.

BadBradBradley: @AlexIsHot95 @LacySerene she's gotta be emo, man, see those scars and bruises. #EMO #ULGY

Retweeted 47 times, Favorited 62 times.

RachyBiz: @LacySerene Do you know how ugly you are? Ha.

Retweeted 19 times, Favorited 25 times.

LaLaLove: @LacySerene get a life, a real one.

Retweeted 12 times, Favorited 14 times.

Leigh_AnnBBy: I mean who here actually likes @LacySerene? Retweet for hate, fav. for liking her.

Retweeted 98 times, Favorited 0 times.

Thanks for ruining my life officially, Leigh-Ann...and everyone who agrees with her...I can't believe the people these days.

"Miss? Are you alright?" I looked up at a man who had come out of the building, locking up the place. I didn't even realize where I was at.

"I-I am fine, yes. Thank you." I turned my head back down to my phone, everyone from school was talking about me, even if they weren't tagging me in it. They use a few hash tags...the same hash tags over and over...and over again.

#LACYDIE #LSWorthless #HateLacy #LacyDies #NoMoreLacy #UselessSerene

These tags had broken my heart several times, the one that started my cutting, the one that made me buy a diary to process everything inside. I cringed as I read over everyone's comments to each other and just their tweets.

LacySerene: When nobody understands you... #problems

That didn't help, I shouldn't have tweeted anything, I shouldn't have even been scrolling down Twitter.

Leigh_AnnBBy: The only problem is you "@LacySerene When nobody understands you... #problems"

Oh my god, I hate her so much. I tried killing myself one time, but it didn't work. I didn't know what to do, sometimes I feel like I'm too trapped for anything. I feel suffocated inside of a small box, it's dark, and no one's there to rescue me.

"Are you alright?" I heard another voice around, it wasn't a voice from here, at least I don't think. I looked up again, this boy had a hoodie on, he looked strange, like one of those rapist.

"Who are-are you?" I mumbled, leaving my phone on my Twitter feed, struggling to stand up.

"You didn't answer my question." He frowned at me, It was quite dark so I couldn't take any of his features in, his hoodie was gray I think, he had on dark skinny jeans, and a pair of sneakers.

"And you didn't answer mine." I back fired, I didn't want to get involved in anything tonight, I didn't want to get through any trouble.

"I probably shouldn't tell you, why are you crying?"

"Haven't you heard, I'm the most hated girl in the town." I broke down into more tears, staring down at my shoes.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're not from here, are you?"

"No, I'm here for work."

"Tell me who you are then."

This boy had slowly pulled his hood back, revealing a few of his features, the light was barely useful, he had light blond hair, a hint of blue eyes, but other than that I couldn't see anything else.

"Do you know me now?"

"No, you didn't tell me who you were."

"I'm, erm, I'm James, yeah, James." He said, kind of unsure of himself.

"Okay, James, why are you talking to me?" My arms crossed over my small chest, I felt quite scared since I didn't have a clue who this boy was.

 "Do you not have a clue who I am?"

"Nope, should I?" I tried staring at him more, taking in more features, I still couldn't recognize him. Oh please don't tell me he's go to our school!

"Well, I mean I guess not, but is it a problem to talk to you?"

"I mean...you'll get yourself...nevermind. I need to leave." I shrugged him off, starting to walk to my car, tears continuing to roll down my cheeks.

I turned my radio back on, but it was a little quieter, I didn't recognize this song either!

"You'll never treat yourself right darlin' but I want you to, if I let you know, I'm here for you, maybe you'll love yourself like I love you, oh." I turned off my radio, realizing that I had not started driving yet. I started up the engine, speeding off back towards my house, I couldn't bare to look at that boy again, I just can't...I can't.

"Hey sweetie, where did you go?" My mother greeted me as I walked in, she was dusting the living room, which she liked to do every couple of days, I don't know why. 

"Just one of those late night drives, they always are relaxing." I replied, not looking at her or else she would have seen my tears, or possibly smeared make-up.

"Ah okay, is all of your homework done?"

"Yes, mother." I rolled my eyes, I have study hall during the day, that's where I finish all of my homework.

"Okay, are you hungry?"

"No, I think I'm just going to go to bed early, thanks anyways, mom." I headed up the stairs, seeing my brother trying to open my door to my room, I always lock it, I asked permission when I was 12 for privacy, and my mom and dad agreed. My dad has been gone for a month, he's in China for business, I still don't understand what he does to this day.

 "What do you think you're doing, Nathan?" I stared down at him, glaring.

"Erm, I just-"

"Wanting to snoop around in my room? You can't, move out of my way." I interrupted him, waiting as he moved to the side. I grabbed my keys and unlocked my door, shoving him away, and relocked it again.

"Why are you so distant with us?" Nathan asked through the door.

"Just go, I have...things to do." I replied, sighing as the thought of me pushing my family away...I have been doing that recently, that's  wrong...

I hate this, I hate it all, where's my phone?

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Ahh! Hopefully you all will get into this story, it was an idea that I thought of, and Niall seemed to be the perfect fit for it :D

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- Kristin xx