Chapter 8

We ate brunch and I kept what was bothering me to myself the entire afternoon. Carlos had gotten a call from Lex and had to get back home for that.

"I'll just drop you guys off at your places and then head back." Carlos smiled as if it wasn't a big deal. I nodded in agreement. Kendall then interrupted.

"If it's important, you can just drop us off at my place and we could hang for a little and then I could take you to your place later, if you want?" Kendall asked smiling. I wanted to say no, but his smile made me think otherwise. His smile was beautiful.

"I'd love to." I smiled shyly. Kendall was so sweet, my heart seemed to swell every time he looked at me. Carlos shot me a warning glance, but then smiled.

"Sounds like a plan." Carlos agreed. We paid separately and then headed out to the Jeep. We got back in and Kendall started to sing along to the radio as we were headed to his place. His voice, oh God. How could I describe a voice so silky smooth and beautiful? Although he wasn't the mainstream type voice, I could picture his song on the radio. I could hear his voice singing any kind of music and still sounding gorgeous.

"You like this song?" Carlos asked Kendall in disbelief. Kendall shrugged.

"Not really, but it's catchy and will get stuck in my head if I don't sing along." Kendall said as a-matter-factly. I smiled to myself listening to Kendall's voice harmonizing with the recorded rough voice of a man on the top 20 countdown. Then out of all the songs in the world to play right when there was traffic, 'Wiggle' by Jason Derulo came on and Kendall also knew all the words. I felt awkward listening to this song because I felt like when it came on, people expected me to 'wiggle' just based on the basis that I was not small and neither was my rear end.

Carlos looked back at me in the rear view mirror as he tried not to smirk. Then he jumped in and joined Kendall in singing. I rolled my eyes and then stared out the window. Kendall then started rapping Snoop Dogg's part and sounded like a total white boy. I started laughing so hard.

"You're a star girl take a bow!" Kendall sang loudly and obnoxiously.

"Okay, thank God this song is almost over." I shouted over the singing and radio. They started laughing as soon as it was over and Kendall started snorting which made all of us break out on laughter. Finally, the traffic started to lighten up and we were moving again. Within a few minutes, we were pulling into a nice apartment complex, much nicer than mine.

"Damn, you people are rich." I mumbled.

"We just happen to be overly blessed." Carlos corrected me. I smiled at that. 'Blessed', how humble and refreshing to hear. Carlos parked and then turned around as Kendall got out of the Jeep. "You sure?" Carlos mouthed. I nodded surely and then opened the door.

"Thank you for everything Carlos." I said standing next to Kendall at the rolled down passenger window after shutting my door.

"No problem, Lizzi." Carlos said giving me my new apparent nickname.

"Really. Thank you." I told him serious. He nodded with a gentle smile.

"Hey, man thanks for helping me this morning." Carlos said to Kendall and giving him a fist bump.

"Yeah, of course dude." Kendall said nodding.

"Alright, see you guys later." Carlos smiled. I waved stepping away and he drove away. I was then alone with Kendall. Although I hadn't been nervous before, I was in this moment.

"This way, my lady." Kendall said cheesily, offering me his arm. What was with these guys offering me their arms as if I was some sort of royalty? I took it giggling. We entered the huge apartment complex and headed to the elevator. Kendall pushed floor six and we waited quietly.

"You live in a really nice building." I complimented him looking at the elevator wallpaper.

"Thanks, I actually live here part time. I most the time just crash here when there's no way I could drive to my other place in a night." He said as we passed the third floor.

"You have another place too?" I asked. Jeez, I thought. He smirked.

"My family's place. Where my brothers and I stay to catch up with our parents and each other sometimes. So technically my parents house." He said trying to sound less stuck up. I smiled.

"So technically part time you still live at home?" I teased. Kendall chuckled but nodded.

"Yeah. I mean if this building would allow pets, especially pigs, then we'd be fine moving out." Kendall said. A pig? Seriously?

"Oh... Well then." I chuckled and the elevator stopped and opened to a loft. He had the entire floor? Holy... Kendall gestured for ladies first. "Wow..." I said looking at the open layout of his apartment. It was stunning. The elevator opened to the living room, that to the left shifted into a little dining room and then into a kitchen. Then to the right there was a curtain for what I assumed was the bedroom and then a door for what I guessed was the bathroom but then a massive amount of instruments were placed around the entire loft making it a total musicians loft.

"Just make yourself at home. Do you want anything to drink?" Kendall asked. I shook my head as we walked in and he took off his hoodie he was wearing. I wandered slowly along the walls of hung up record of both Heffron Drive and Big Time Rush. It was odd seeing younger versions of all the guys I knew. The wall also was covered in many beautifully crafted guitars in various makes and colors.

"You play guitar, right?" I asked Kendall without looking at him even though I knew he was coming around to stand beside me.

"Yeah. Self taught." He said. We stood in silence for a moment before Kendall stuttered. "Do you wanna, maybe hear something?" He asked. I turned to look at him which I had to look up to do.

"If you sing while playing." I said quietly not knowing where the bold confidence came form. Kendall smiled shyly, but nodded once. He then turned and grabbed his plain acoustic guitar.

"Take a seat." He said nodding to the couch. I did as he wished and sat. He looked a tad nervous which was cute to be.

"Don't be nervous." I said smiling. He looked up from his guitar and smirked.

"Would you like Big Time Rush material or Heffron Drive?" Kendall asked raising an eyebrow while gently strumming randomly. I thought a moment.

"Surprise me." I said. Kendall must've liked that answer as he then started strumming quietly, but then grew louder. After a few, what I assumed were measures in the song, Kendall began to sing and the words he chose spoke a little to me as if he chose that song for a reason.

"I know all the things people say. I know sticks and stones may break your bones, but you still feel the pain. All they got is jealousy! But we got everything, let the world attack. Go to war for ya girl I got your back." He sang strongly and perfectly. His eyes were closed, but I could feel the want to open his and to see me happy. But I was tearing up. He chose that song for a reason, I could sense it. He wanted me to feel special and like he supported me in everything I did. But he needed to know, before going on, that I had drunkenly kissed his best friend. That I was inexperienced in everything in addition to sober kissing. Before he thought he could ask me out on a date, he needed to know that there was a very brief, vague history between Logan and me.

"Hey, hey. Are you okay?" Kendall asked I assumed after opening his eyes and stopped playing. I shook my head, trying to keep the tears from falling. "What's wrong?" Kendall asked me, walking over and sitting next to me on the sofa. He took his guitar and set it down on the coffee table. I closed my eyes for a second.

"You're really great, Kendall. Really, really great. You talked to me like a real person last night, and I thank you for that. I know why you picked that song. I know I'm not the normal size for a girl my age. I know I'm different..." I said as a tear slipped.

"Oh my God, did I upset you with the song? Did you think I was trying to point that out? Because I wasn't. I just really thought that part for you was perfect. I'm so-" he started to say taking my hand and holding it in both of his.

"No, no. I get it, Kendall. You're so sweet. I just wanna say that if things were different I would kiss you, right here and now." I said letting myself speak my mind. Kendall laughed confused.

"Then, why don't you?" He asked confused, but kept smiling. I laughed sadly as I looked to his green eyes.

"I kissed Logan." I blurted out. Kendall's face fell.

"What? When?" He asked furrowing his brow.

"When I was drunk last night." I told him swallowing my pride. Kendall was then quiet. He stayed quiet for a good five minutes.

"Do you have feelings for him?" Kendall then asked and looked me in the eyes. I could honestly answer this and feel confident with some hope.

"No." I told him. He stared into my eyes. Before I knew it, he was leaning forward and put his hand on my cheek and the other on my neck bringing me closer. "It was my first kiss though." I whispered feeling my cheeks blush from the admittance.

"So, if you don't have feelings for him, and you were drunk, was it really the first kiss you think you deserve?" Kendall whispered as his breath danced on my lips. That was unexpected, and so was my reaction. My own hands instinctively grasped Kendall's neck and the other was lost in his hair. His lips caressed mine and I felt an intensity like never before. His lips were poison to me, and I couldn't get them out of my system, but I didn't want them out.

"What's the verdict?" Kendall asked breathless, and pulling away from my overwhelmed self.

"You couldn't tell from my lips?" I asked astonished. He chuckled and then placed his lips on mine once more.

"I say you got a first kiss worthy of your greatness now." He joked. I rolled my eyes. I leaned forward and a hold of his neck with both my hands and brought him close.

"Oh trust me, I can't help, but agree with you there." I whispered bringing his mouth to mine again.