Chapter 58

YOUR P.O.V.

Running straight into my son’s room, wiping all the tears form my eyes. I was embarrassed. Ashamed. Dumb for letting this happen to me. Regardless if Malik was sleeping or not and I don’t care if Diggy was chasing me through the house, I was leaving. I was getting out of here and as far, far away from Diggy as possible. He cheated. He cheated. Again. Again? Wait...

Diggy- Y/N...

Y/N- *turns to him*

Diggy- Babe, please, don’t leave. Lemme explain.

Y/N- Alright. Why did you do it?

Diggy- Babe, I didn’t mean to hurt you

Y/N- That wasn’t the question.

Diggy- I.. I was tempted

Y/N- *rolls her eyes and folds her arms*

Diggy- Troy put us on a job.. and then I was working with her on all this new stuff.. and then I just got caught up in it. 

Y/N- She was your ex.

Diggy- *nods* I know, I know a.

Y/N- And you.. went back to her? You had me, and your son, at home, and she comes in the picture and you go back?

Doggy- No, it wa..

Y/N- And with Jasmine *laughs* Do not get me started with Jasmine, you went back to her too! When I was here! So what is it, your exes are your new fetish? Your fantasy or just what you really want instead of me? Are there any other exes I need to know about!?

Diggy- Y/N! Please!

Malik- *cries in his crib*

Diggy- *sighs* You’re making him cry...

Y/N- And you’re making me feel sick. *walks to the crib* *picks up Malik and hushes him back to sleep*

Diggy- Babe..

Y/N- *turns to him* I’m not done with you. *puts Malik back to sleep* *walks out*

Diggy- *follows you you the bedroom* Please, let me talk to you..

Y/N- No, let me ask you some questions, cause.. *laughs to herself* I can’t even fucking believe I’m sitting here, giving you a chance to make me forgive you

Diggy- *sighs*

Y/N- *sits on the bed* *looks at Diggy* Why her?

Diggy- Babe.. it’s not li..

Y/N- Answer the damn question.

Diggy- I.. It was just temptation that I gave into. We were working together a..

Y/N- Hold on.. how long was this going on for?

Diggy- *mumbles* A few months..

Y/N- A.. *blinks and stutters* A few months? Did you just say a few months?

Diggy- Baby, ple..

Y/N- No! What the fuck?! You’ve been... *stumbles on her sentences* Oh myu God.. you’ve been having sex with her, for months?! Months Diggy!?

Diggy- Baby, it was all a mistake

Y/N- That you continued to do! While I’m here looking after your son, taking care of our home and managing your schedule, you were selfish and went to another woman for sex!? We’re engaged! Does that even mean a thing to you?!

Diggy- Babe, it was when we started working together and I didn’t mean for it, I’m sorry!

Y/N- *pauses* So when I cheated with Troy...

Diggy- *swallows hard*

Y/N- And, and you punished me for it for weeks. Manipulating me, I was always apologising, treading on fucking eggshells for you, you continued to cheat on me? *looks at him*

Diggy- *looks away* 

Y/N- You can’t even look me in the eyes and apologise, can you?

Diggy- *looks at you* With all my heart, I didn’t mean for this to happen. I kept on telling myself that it was wrong..

Y/N- But you thought with your dick, didn’t you? You say all the right things, the apologies, sorry’s, I love you’s and promises, but everything you do is the opposite. You just hurt everyone you come into contact with. *stands up*

Diggy- *walks up and holds you* I don’t want you to go.. *tears fall* Not now, please. I need you.

Y/N- Really? You need me? Cause for the last few months, you’ve been needing her and having sex with her..

Diggy- You don’t understand. I don’t have sex with her

Y/N- *blinks at him* What?

Diggy- We.. we fuck. With her, it’s nothing. I don’t feel anything, she;s beautiful, yes, but she’s not you. With you, it’s love, it’s passion, it’s amazing. It’s real. It’s sex. With her, I feel numb, but you’re everything, with you it’s all I could want.

Y/N- It’s not enough.

Diggy- *nods* It is babe.

Y/N- *pushes his hands off her* Repeatedly. In the study? In our bed, huh?

Diggy- I.. *pauses and stops*

Y/N- You fucked her, if you wanna call it that, in our bed? The bed we share, in the house we pay for together? With our son’s room next door? *hits him* Do you have no respect!?

Diggy- Baby!! Please.. *tries to hold you* It wasn’t sex!

Y/N- *shouts* You still put your dick in her! You still fucked her, you still had sex and in our home!! You brought that hoe in our house!! *hits him and holds back tears* Just.. go back to her!

Diggy- No..!

Y/N- Yes!! *backs away from him* Cause you can’t pick, can you? It’s either her or me.. and if you have to pick between me and someone else, I don’t want you to choose me! *starts to cry*

Diggy- I don’t have to choose you, you’re all I want!

Y/N- You’ve been saying that for years and you always, always turn around and hurt me. Why can’t you see that everything you touch turns to stone Diggy?! Why can’t you see that everyday, you just hurt me, more and more, no matter what.  *wipes her tears* I hate you..

Diggy- No you, don’t, don’t say that..

Y/N- Just go back to her! I hate you! You know what, I really do regret breaking up with Jermaine. He’d never, ever treat me like this

Diggy- Why are you saying that? Why do you always say this when we’re at this stage?

Y/N- Because it’s the truth and we know it. Because h’s never hurt me, because he’d never cheat, lie, break my heart... and you did all of that. Go back and call Zendaya to fuck. She probably wants you..

Diggy- *shakes head* No, she doesn’t. I don’t want her.

Y/N- Why?

Diggy- I want you! I want you and only you and I’ll say it all the time Y/N, I’m sorry! I don’t know what it is that makes me hurt you all the time and you’ve been through a lot. I don’t want you doing this on your own, or even with someone else, I wanna be here for the whole journey. With our son, with the rest of our children..

Y/N- *looks down*

Diggy- I don’t want to marry or have kids or even grow old with anyone else. I just don’t want Zendaya. She’s not you I broke it off the other night with her, it’s not gonna work out and then she said she was pregna..

Y/N- *looks up and stares at him*

Diggy- *looks at you*

Y/N- I just.. *laughs* *walks to her closet*

Diggy- Babe..! *goes to pull you*

Y/N- *screams* Don’t you dare! Don’t you fucking dare touch me! *pushes him away* You’re disgusting! *shudders* She’s pregnant!? I’m not condoning the cheating, but you didn’t even wear a condom.. and then you’d fuck me?! *hits him repeatedly*

Diggy- *pushes you off* Baby, please! Stop! I’m sorry, I don’t know what else to tell you!

Y/N- *grabs a bag* *starts to throw clothes in*

Every.. single.. last.. piece.. of.. clothing. Whatever the fuck I could find went straight in the bag. My perfume, shoes, jackets, jewellery. Everything. You fucked her, she’s pregnant with your child.. and you want me here? No. Just no. I had enough baby mama drama with Jasmine, I’m done.I packed clothes for my son..

God, the ability to hold in my tears was wearing thin, I wanted to cry. He cheated on me. He punished me for it and now it was my turn to punish him. I was not gonna be here. I’d no longer be here. But this was the worst part. I had a secret I’d been keeping. And It couldn’t involve Diggy, not anymore.

DIGGY’S P.O.V.

Diggy- *tears fall fast* Please.. babe, please

Y/N- *lowers her tone* Get off me Daniel.

Diggy- *shakes his head frantically* *sinks to the floor and grabs onto your legs*

Y/N- *sighs*

Diggy- *cries* Please don’t leave me.. please don’t go. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.. this won’t happen ever again.. *holds your legs tighter*

Y/N- I know it won’t. Because I’m gone and you won’t see me again.

Diggy- You’re not taking my son.. not now. Not ever

Y/N- *looks at him* *shakes him off her legs*

Diggy- *cries on the floor*

Y/N- *picks up her bags and Malik’s carrier* *walks to the car*

I burst into tears. That’s all I could do. I fucked up.. everything. This huge secret, this lie, it played on my brain for the longest. All because I wasn’t honest, I didn’t love her enough like I thought I did.. my actions fucked up my words.. and she was the only thing worth living for. 

She didn’t take long to change everything for herself. Malik’s nursery was eerily quiet now. She moved out over the next few days, went to live with Evie. I’d begged at her doorstep for her forgiveness, but I just looked like a fool to her. Begging for forgiveness I didn’t deserve really. I wanted her back. I loved her. I know it’s dumb, but I loved her. My heart ached for her. My soul needed to see her smile when I woke up or when I came home and went to sleep. I needed her. Not a quick fuck with any girl. I needed Y/N.

She’d left her job. Troy didn’t say why, her senior didn’t explain. The CEO didn’t even tell me. It was just three more days later and she’d transferred jobs. She came to get her stuff while I wasn’t home, or she’d send Evie or Justine. They both didn’t really talk to me, but said I’d made a huge mistake. I didn’t need them to tell me that. She left all of Malik’s nursery stuff, Eves saying she didn’t want it. She bought a new house, but I don’t know where. She just.., moved on. Forgot me. Got on with her life without me. I never saw her again.

*at the label* 

Zendaya- It’s gone. I had an abortion

Diggy- *sits back in the chair*

Zendaya- I.. I was almost two months

Diggy- *drinks his coffee*

Zendaya- The doctor said I could have had a great pregnancy.. *looks at him*

Diggy- *texting on his phone*

Zendaya- Are you even listening?

Diggy- *looks at her* What?

Zendaya- Urgh, I’m done. *gets up*

Diggy- *watches her get up* *looks back at his phone*

Zendaya- *looks at him* You’re not gonna stop me?!

Diggy- *looks at her confused* Why would I?

Zendaya- Because I’m leaving!

Diggy- Nah. You wanna leave? Go.

Zendaya- *eyes widen* Did you not hear what I said before?

Diggy- Yeah, the baby’s gone and that’s it. That’s all I wanna know

Zendaya- *shake sher head* You’re so selfish..

Diggy- And you’re stupid to think that just because a guy fucks you means he’s really into you. He doesn’t want a relationship, he doesn’t want marriage, fuck it, he doesn’t want you. Maybe right now, but not seriously. You know and I know, we were just fuckin!

Zendaya- *points at him* Never, ever call me again.

Diggy- *laughs* It’s never me that does the calling!

Zendaya- *slams the door*

Troy- *walks in* The hell is she going? Y’all got a project a..

Diggy- Yeah.. that’s not happening.

Troy- What?

Diggy- She’s pretty mad. We’re not gonna work together anymore.

Troy- What the fuck!? You can’t just ruin relationships with your co-workers Diggy!

Diggy- *raises his eyebrows* I didn’t do anything! She’s hormonal and upset! Blame her!

Troy- *sits down and sighs* Whatever... *looks at him* Where’s Y/N? She okay? *smirks*

Diggy- Don’t make me..

Troy- *chuckles* All I heard was that the engagement is off.. and she’s disappeared? *shakes his head* What the hell did you do.. 

Diggy- None of your fuckin business.

Troy- Hey, as long as your next album is fire, straight hits, whether it’s on the chart or not, I’m good. If I get paid, you get paid and everybody happy. I want a platinum album this time. No gold shit. And no love shit. I don’t really give a fuck what happened between you and Y/N or whatever, this project has to be amazing. Get to it. Studio’s waitin downstairs..

Diggy- *sighs and gets up*

YOUR P.O.V.

*that evening*

I moved out. I hadn’t seen him in days. Well.. now it was almost two weeks. I’d transferred jobs. I needed to. I needed something away from Diggy. Where he’d never find me. Never see me and I’d be good bringing up my son by myself. Well, not completely. I stayed at Evie’s for a while until I bought a new house. She and Justine helped me get most of my things, helping me move on.. though Malik was the image of his father, I had to do this for him and myself.

The emotional trauma was too much. It was enough that I struggled to pick up my own son after just a day. He looked like Diggy so much that it scared me, Evie was so worried, she called my therapist to help asap. I needed time really. Jermaine went crazy when Evie told him, he begged to come and see me, then to rip Diggy’s head off. Evie.. God damn, you don’t want to know how Evie really was. She was about to storm out the house with a fucking cleaver and kill Diggy. I had to hold her off, beg her, push and plead with her. Her past was something you didn’t forget when she got angry, she had to let it go... But me? Numerous showers had to be taken, painkillers were a routine and ignoring memories was so hard. So hard...

This... secret I’d been keeping. Was harder. It was conflicting and brought back a lotta pain. I’d been almost two months since I knew. I pushed it to the back of my mind to stop me telling the wrong person. With Justine living with me in a new town and Evie just a block away, I needed my sisters around me. Sister and soul sister... I needed to tell them.

Evie- *holds your hand* What?

Justine- *holds your other hand* *leans in towards you*

Y/N- *bites her lip* *looks at them both* I’m pregnant.

Evie- *eyes widen* Again?

Y/N- *nods*

Justine- And is it..?

Y/N- *nods more*

Justine- Ohh.. shit.

Evie- *lets go of your hand* Oh hell no.

Y/N- *sits back and sighs*