Chapter Sixteen

Lisa •••

I insisted on taking Jennie home, but she was adamant on going to Chaeyoung's to support her single's release tonight. The Chipmunk was really excited earlier at the pre-recording too, and I didn't want to disappoint her on a special day.

We walked slower because Jennie was still wobbly. It's easy to gauge her exhaustion just by the look. Her eyes are red and hooded and her skin is pale. I offered to carry her on my back, but she knew I was feeling a tiredness of my own. Knowing that we could relax in Chaeng's house was pushing us to move foreword. It took us thirty minutes when it should have fifteen, to get to our friend's apartment.

But when we arrived, tranquility wasn't waiting for us.

"Maybe if you told me then I wouldn't be this mad about it." Chaeyoung snaps at Jisoo.

"What's going on?" Jennie whispers to me when we enter.

"I knew you would react like this and not let me invite him at all." Jisoo counters. The tension of the room is high and if I knew any better, I'd say either could throw a fit any second.

"What's wrong?" I ask the two, who finally make our presence known as we walk in. Rosie runs her fingers through her hair while Jisoo turns to us in vexation.

"Taehyung showed up at the party after you guys left."

I'm taken back by the strain of Chaeyoung's voice. "Because she fucking invited him. And I bet the egotistical fuck told someone he was going out with you." I've never seen her as frustrated as this. I wonder if this is what Jennie meant by an angry Rosie.

"Okay," Jennie advances between the two. "why don't we calm down and then talk about it."

"The whole fucking media is talking about it."

"Hey." I put a hand on Chaeyoung's shoulder and she glares at me.

"Chu?" Jennie faces her. "What happened?"

Jisoo sighs heavily and massages her temples before speaking. "Taehyung came to the party and I left with him. We just wanted to hang out as the two of us and get to know each other, just like you said to do. We made sure to pass the parking garage where there was no one to see, but somehow the media found out we were leaving together."

Rosie made it clear that Taehyung is bad news. I think I can understand her aggravation with Jisoo for leaving with him so blatantly, let alone invite him without telling her. And Jisoo is right about it not involving our friend at all, but these rumors could ruin one's reputation just as fast as they spread, and I don't think either of us would want to watch that happen to Jisoo.

"Is there proof?" I ask. She shakes her head.

"But someone must have seen them or Taehyung told some goddamn rat himself."

"He wouldn't do that." Jisoo defends. "He's actually really nice and caring if you just get to know him."

"It's all an act to get in your pants."

"Rosie," Jennie stands right in front of her and speaks softly." if you wanna let off some steam, do it on me."

"Jisoo." I walk over to the kitchen where she collects all her things. I hear a door slam behind me. Jennie can cool Chaeyoung off. "Are you leaving?"

"It's better that I go, isn't it?" she throws on her coat and stomps in her shoes.

"Look, just wait for her to think about things." I follow Jisoo out the door and in the elevator.

"Today is a big day for Rosie and I've ruined it enough."

"She'll forget about it once she's calm, you know how she is. She'll be hugging and jumping on you in the next hour."

She huffs and turns to me. There's a gloss to her eyes, but I'm second guessing the tears because Jisoo never cries. "Let me know how it goes tonight." she steps out of the elevator once it opens and I know there's no stopping her. "And tell me about last night, too." she adds with a cluck to the tongue.

Even in pressing situations, Jisoo's charisma never falters.

When the doors close, I pull out my phone. I find that the articles surfaced just an hour ago and the number of them are growing with each refresh of the page. There aren't any photos like Jisoo said, but the source's story matches everything else she told us. Mr. Yang won't be pleased with this. Collaborations are hard enough to obtain without a scandal because the people love to twist things around, but there's still a line drawn between the companies.

Getting caught in a scandal yourself is like playing with fire.

•••

Jennie and I tried to keep Chaeyoung in a positive headspace after the heated argument. Rightfully so, she was joining us dance to our first live streaming of her comeback release.

The song, music video, and other promos were blowing up around the world by the minutes that went by. If I'm being honest, I was growing happier thinking that the articles were turning towards Rosie's work and not the rumors.

Jennie and I wanted to bask in Chaeng's glory of a song, so we had it on replay through dinner and until it was time to head home. I was at ease knowing Chaeyoung was going to sleep with a happy heart. And because of our contentment, my girlfriend and I were skipping all the way to the train station.

"I'll give you back your clothes after I wash them." Jennie said. I told her to keep them instead. I like the big fit on her. As much as I wanted her to stay another night at my place, I didn't want to deprive Jennie of her personal space. I myself knew it was going to be a long day in the next morning until night comes back around.

Jennie texted me when she got home and back & forth, we conversed until she fell asleep. The drowsiness of yesterday still took an effect in the morning, but after wrapping up my first meeting at Vogue Korea in a boardroom of editors, creative directors, and the Chanel representatives, my limbs were jittering.

"Tomorrow is settled then. I'll leave it to you, Ms. Manoban." Mr. Representative closed the meeting at that. We exchanged chit-chat for a few minutes to gain good report between the team. Their hospitality was meaningful and they made the five hour long meeting feel like one.

Though, that five hour long sit down had me bolting to YG as fast as I could to make it to Chaeyoung's broadcast screening. When I arrived, the producers, spectators, and other YG staff members were already in the room, waiting for the live show to start. I bowed in respect as I entered, making my way all the way to Chaeyoung who sits at the back of the room.

"What's up, Chipmunk." I give her a hug and sit next to her.

"Not gonna lie, I'm kinda nervous." I can tell. She's biting her nails. "People have mixed comments about my music video and the photoshoot pictures."

"What do you mean?"

"Some people think its new and fresh," someone turns up the TV as the show is about to start. "and some people think its provocative and too much." Chaeyoung puts her legs up on the chair and hugs her knees. "What if they think this performance is too much?"

The dance is sultry, as I was told to make it, but only to come in line with the style of the song. For the broadcast, her outfit wasn't tantalizing or anything that would present as provocative. But I understand her fret. Korea isn't on the outskirts of modesty just yet and there are boundaries even in the K-Pop industry. Chaeyoung felt like the outfits for the music video and photoshoots were baring for her taste, but carried on nevertheless because time was money and there wasn't any to change the concepts of the producers in the slightest. If anyone should be receiving backlash, it should be them.

"It's fine, though, right? Everybody just has their own opinions." she mumbles, falling back on the positive outlooks. She turns to me with a 'right?' expression.

I'm not certain, but I nod my head anyway. She needs support, not pessimism.

"It's starting." Chaeyoung's manager announces. The room goes silent and heads direct to the screen. My best friend lets her legs down and sits up straight on her chair, giving all focus to the show with her chin up.

As the introductions begin, Jennie texts right on cue. "Rosie, fighting! Baby, fighting!" I can hear it in her aegyo voice.

I thank her and relay the support to Chaeng. I ask Jennie if she had eaten lunch earlier and remind her not to work too hard. She went to bed early last night, so I'm hoping she is well rested.

"Jisoo brought me lunch. She's still down about the rumors, but said Rosie and her apologized to each other this morning. YG hasn't mentioned anything to her about the whole thing." she informs me. I was anxious about what Mr. Yang would do. He could take back the collaboration or put Jisoo's solo projects on hold for all he cares. Jennie follows up a second text. "She talked to Taehyung about it, too. I'm starting to think they're actually becoming good friends."

"It's her birthday tomorrow. Let's get her something she'll love." Jisoo will be spending it with her family and a gift could help cheer her up, too.

She agrees. "By the way, you might as well had told Chu all the details of the other night." I know she's joking, but the embarrassment still creeps in.

Of course Jisoo would ask about our sex life on both ends. 

"Don't worry, Lili. I didn't tell her that you're into toys." Such a tease.

"I have a lot more where that came from." I play with her, since the cats out of the bag between us and the vibrator.

"Surprise me."

I peak at Chaeyoung who doesn't shift her gaze by an inch off the screen. The opening act's performance is on, so hers should be shown next.

"I'll text later. I'm settling things with my coffee distributor." Jennie says and I leave her be to continue work.

I place a hand on Chaeng's knee, seeing that it's bouncing up and down by her subconscious. It stops, and she turns to me with her lips pursed to a nervous smile. "It'll be fine, Chipmunk."

It was more than fine.

The performance I saw on TV was just as outstanding as what I saw yesterday and all the times we practiced leading up to this day.

Chaeyoung was flawless. A total stunner.

Everyone in the room was enraptured. And my best friend was exultant.

"I couldn't have done it without you, Lisa." she hugged me so tight, I lost blood circulation for a second.

After the show, we all stayed for the dinner Chaeyoung sponsored for everyone's hard work. It was three hours worth of conversing with the team and producers. I couldn't count how many times I shared my background with the people I spoke to. From trainee, to college, to photography, to dance, to now. It was nice to engage with Chaeyoung's team because it meant having good relations, but I couldn't fully invest in creating a foundation of friendship with anyone. The atmosphere was vibrant, but I was drained. 

For my best friend, I stay until the dinner is officially over. She hangs back at YG to work overtime, while I head for Coffee Pages to finally see my girlfriend.

"Nayeon's having a party on the 4th. Bring Jennie. I'll tell Jisoo, too." she said before we parted ways. 

The walk there is strenuous. My whole body is shivering in the piercing cold air and my face feels frozen, like the bitter air is bitting on my cheeks. I have to tense up to shelter my warmth whenever a breeze hits, but my weariness is making that painful, too. My only reason to continue venturing through the brumal weather is the comfort I'll have in Jennie's arms. Not even just the cozy bookstore café she's waiting in.

I have only ever found reason in Jennie ever since I arrived back in Korea.

I bought quality kitchen ware because of Jennie. I'm learning to cook because of Jennie. I don't mind sleeping late because of Jennie. I love life because of Jennie. I'll trudge snow and icy weather any day because of Jennie. And I'll do it a hundred thousand times over because I love Jennie that much.

She's shown me love for what it truly looks like. In the touch of her hand, the seasoning of her food, the good morning texts, the late night walks, the smile in our kiss, her smile on its own, and in everything Jennie does.

And if I never found love with Jennie, then I don't think I would find it anywhere else.

God, I love her. I'll say it to any god who will hear me.

My hand flings out of my pocket to wipe the loose tears that fall and I'm laughing at myself for going soft all of a sudden.

She just has that effect on me.

Now, the shop is just a few feet away and I can see her figure sitting by the bookstore counter.

Her slim legs hang off the stool with poise. Her back is beautifully curved over to the work she's doing on the desk. Her side profile is sharp and refined.

It's like blessings on blessings with Jennie.

I just want to look at her forever and I know forever is a lot to ask for- impossible as it seems. And thinking about going through time without Jennie is suddenly gut-wrenching.

My eyes are welling up again and I'm not composed enough to blink them away before the bells chime and she's running over to me with her arms open.

"Lili!"

I'm warm again.

There's a bubble of emotions building up and up inside me that I'm really about to cry. "Hi, baby."

She snaps her head up in concern and she's quick to catch the tears falling freely. "Lisa, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." I smile, because everything about us is so right.

"Are you okay?" More than that. "You're freezing, love." That's fine. "Why are you crying?" Because of you.

The furrow of her brows and eyes like a puppy's is the most adorable thing. She pulls my beanie down in place and my coat closed. She rubs my hands, arms, and back to warm me up.

And I, I just fall deeper into her love. I'm afraid I'll be too late if I don't dive in now.

"Lisa, you're scaring me, what's wrong?" she cups my face again. Neither of us can keep up with my tears.

"I'm crying thinking if I ever have to lose you."

I don't know if I said it loud enough for the gods hear, but I know Jennie heard me.

It was a statement of the unexpected and I'm sure she was waiting to hear something else. But after a moment of being in each other's arms, just to make sure what I said is true, she kisses me. 

I'm in so deep.