Chapter Two

Lisa •••

Seasons aren't really my thing. Summer all around seems much more like-able than drastic changes in weather between the months. This winter is something I'll have to get used to. On a good note, the holiday feels much more like the holidays they picture in movies.

Leaving Thailand was hard the first time, but after gaining so many memories with my college friends and being with my family back home was even harder to let go. When I left to be a trainee here in Korea, I was young. I didn't have that many friends and my father was traveling around for work at the time. The only person that felt difficult to be separated from was my mother. But when plans changed and I decided to go back to Thailand for school, I met so many amazing people and enjoyed plenty of fun experiences.

Now, all I have left are photographs of those memories tucked away in a box. It was all I could bring of them.

I have yet to empty out the many boxes in my small apartment. I spent all day of my arrival yesterday trudging those boxes up to the third floor of my building. There aren't any elevators. I'm lucky enough to claim the 3rd floor. I'm also fortunate that Chaeyoung lives in walking distance and came by to help me with my belongings. She didn't mind the heavy lifting as long as it meant I'd be settling in faster.

She might be more excited than me. She calls me everyday, more than once, to remind me. The thought of working with Chaeyoung was one of the only things motivating me to take a step into this new life. I'll be able to dance again and show the world of entertainment what moves I can really do. Or, the moves that Chaeng can do with what I create. Being hired to choreograph all songs of a k-pop idol is a huge deal. But being hired to choreograph for your best friend's dream is even bigger.

I took the opportunity right away when YG contacted me. I guess my time as a trainee proved to them what skills I really have as a dancer. Though, I knew being a choreographer alone wasn't going to suffice financially. I'm Thai. In Korea. I don't get paid as much as Koreans.

That led to applying for Vogue Korea. To add to the list of my lucky chances, the magazine company was looking for photographers to cover products to be featured in the magazines. With my college portfolio and intern experiences in Thailand, they were very interested in what I could do. I have my own style to photography. They called it refreshing during the phone call. The awards I earned in local contests and the degree I have in photography from the finest art university in Thailand was confirmation that they could trust me.

So I packed up all my things, said goodbye to my friends and family, and boarded the plane. This is only my second day in Seoul and my mother has already sent me four long messages of 'I love you's and 'I miss you's. And I sent her back four long messages, too.

Being away from her wasn't ideal for me, but I knew I could make more money here than at home, despite the low income as a foreigner. The entertainment industry is very serious in Korea and that means high demand for professions in that field. If I work hard enough, I'll be able to support my mother from this far away. It will be a slow process, but I'm determined to make this work.

For now, I'll have to make trudging this thick snow in white sneakers work. My socks are already soaked from the ten minute walk from my apartment. This café better be as good as Chaeyoung says for this travel to be worth it. If I'm let down, I'll have to ask her to buy me a pair of boots.

I miss summer.

I think about sunny Thailand as I walk down the street and towards Coffee Pages as google maps tells me it is just a few steps away. As I approach, I see that it is a bookstore and café in one with simple bookshelves and decor. I shake the snow off my drenched sneakers and enter the, very much appreciated, warm, steamy establishment.

The lady by the counter lifts her head from a thick book she's highlighted almost completely to smile at me. "Can I help you?" she asks.

"I'm meeting a friend. Thank you." I bow. I need to get back on this practice like they taught me as a trainee.

"Café is over there." she points and goes back to her book. I walk further into the store, stopping to look at a few books on the shelves, then step into the café area. I easily spot Chaeyoung by a table, being handed a mug with what looks like strawberry flavored marshmallows.

As I approach, I notice a familiarity with the lady serving Chaeng. Her small hands, brown hair tied, mole on the back of her neck, height a few inches below mine.

I have to stop in my tracks before I spin her around and hug her. That would be too awkward for her to be squished by someone she hasn't seen or spoken to in four years. The last I heard of Jennie was that she claimed a café to her name two years ago. This Coffee Pages must be it.

"Could I get one of that, too?" I finally manage to speak and let my presence known.

And I have to hold my breath when she actually spins around to face me.

"You're here!" Rosie exclaims.

Say something, Lisa. "It's been a long time."

She's beautiful.

I hold my hand out to her because I just need to feel her to know that she's really standing in front of me again. "The store looks great, Jennie."

"Lisa?"

I smile brightly, realizing how much I missed her voice. "One and only."

She wraps her arms around my neck and hugs me tightly. I curse at myself for the attempted hand shake. "H-how are you?" she seems to be shocked that I'm standing here. "Oh." and in her arms, because she immediately pulls away with an awkward laugh. "Sorry, I uhm... You're right its been a long time. How are you?"

"I've been good, Jen, thanks. And you?"

"Good." she says, nodding her head with a smile and straightening her apron.

"Can't I get a hello, too?" Chaeyoung breaks my trance from Jennie.

"Hey, Chaeng." I bend my knees to give her a side hug.

"I-I'll go get you, uhm, one of that." Jennie hurries away to the counter.

I take the seat across from Chaeng, but unfortunately, with my back facing Jennie's station. I'll just have to wait for her to come back so I can look at her again.

"How did you sleep?" Chaeyoung asks, sipping her hot coco.

"Well on a scale from one to ten, sleeping on a mattress in a stripped down apartment in the middle of December rates a four at most."

"You should have walked to my place. I told you I have an extra room since my sister is in Australia for most of the year."

"I didn't wanna impose."

I look around the café. It's very simple. White walls with abstract paintings, fine wooden tables and chairs, and a few shelves on the walls with plates and pots as decor. It's very Jennie. In addition, the small Christmas tree by the corner and the music really set the tone of the holiday.

"One hot chocolate for you." she's back.

"Thanks, Jennie, this smells really good." I bring the cup to my nose and inhale the sweet scent of coco.

She pulls a chair from another table and sits with us. "I didn't know you were here in Seoul." she says softly.

"Oh shoot, I forgot to tell you." Chaeyoung pouts, "Surprise!" I laugh at her cheeky joke.

"I just arrived yesterday. I got a job under YG to choreograph for Chaeng and I'm a photographer for Vogue." I fill in Jennie on my current situation and she nods her head in understanding.

"You're living here again?"

"Yup. Settled in just a few minutes away from here."

"She lives so close to me and the store, it's great, huh." Chaeyoung states happily.

"It really is." Jennie chuckles and gives me a gentle smile. "I'm happy for you."

"You have a good looking store running here. It really suits you." the compliment runs a light blush on her cheeks. God, she's so cute.

"Thanks. This has been my life for those four years." she gestures to the ambiance. I suddenly wish I had been there to see her shaping up the business. Four years was a long time to be away and keeping in touch doesn't seem as hard as it did before. I wish I could go back and send her a few messages to let her know I was still a friend.

Because the way she sits with her back straight, hands on her lap, and formality in tone isn't really what friends do around each other.

"I'm very proud." the words slip out quietly because I'm almost breathless looking at her. And I'm also confused as to why I can't stop looking at her. I just wanna keep on looking at her.

I notice the slight bags under her eyes and her frame seems skinnier than I remember. She's grown up beautifully- I think I mentioned that already- but she looks tired.

Then a thought I had almost forgotten reminds me why we grew apart in the first place.

"Oh," Rosie's phone starts to ring. "It's my manager. Hold on." she gets up and walks to the bookstore area, leaving Jennie and I alone at the table.

"Those are really pretty." I point to the plates and other decor on the shelves.

"Ah," she laughs. I hope she laughs again. "Those took some time to make."

"You made those?"

"Mhm." she stands up and takes one of the plates in her hands. She comes back, showing me the details of the design up close. "I made this one for Rosie on her 22nd birthday. She said she wanted it on display here for everyone to see." It's a baby pink plate with a tiny sunflower painted at the center.

"Why didn't I get one for my birthday?" I tease, flashing my irresistible puppy eyes. I can imagine mine to be yellow.

She laughs again. "I'll make it up to you then." I take a few sips while she puts back the plate in its place. "So you've been in touch with Rosie?"

This might get awkward.

"Uhm, yeah, we've been in touch since I left our trainee days." I tell her. She nods. "We call and text back and forth."

"What about Jisoo?"

"We'd hear from each other sometimes, but not as often as Rosie and I." Please, don't be angry.

"I see." she fiddles with her fingers on the table, looking at them instead of me.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"I should have texted."

"Me too." there's a smile again, but its a sad one. "I got caught up with work and my mom and taking care of all of this that I didn't even try. I'm sorry."

I understand. She doesn't even have anything to be sorry about. She had her priorities and her own life to figure out. If only I had been there for her. "I'm sorry about your mom." this is my first time extending my condolences, because even when Chaeyoung and Jisoo told me of the news three years ago, I never called or messaged. "I'm sorry about your uncle, too." and neither did I do it the year after.

"Thanks, Lisa. But enough with the sorries." she laughs to lighten the mood. "We're having dinner tonight with Jisoo. You should join us."

"Really?"

"Of course."

I'm so happy to hear this that I can't stop myself from smiling like an idiot, so I hide my face with the mug. "Alright, Lis, we gotta go." Rosie says with a sigh as she returns.

My smile disappears.

"I'll transfer your drinks for take out." Jennie takes the mugs.

"Already?" I ask Chaeng who puts her coat back on.

"Manager said that the traffic is pretty bad because of the snow so we have to leave for the meeting earlier."

I get up from my chair in dismay and follow Chaeyoung to the counter where Jennie has our drinks ready. I take out my card to pay, but she shakes her head. "On the house."

"Yay!"

"Are you sure?" I ask and she nods her head assuringly.

"You guys should get going. I'll see you tonight?"

The meeting was long and took a lot of energy out of me to please the producers for Rosie's new comeback. Although, I think they really liked my ideas and by the way Rosie can't sit still in the car after leaving, she must really love the plans too.

I try to take some positive vibes from her for the dinner tonight. I'm seeing Jennie again, which is already an energy booster. I still can't fathom how stupid I was to disconnect from her for so long.

"Sorry about your shoes. I forgot boots aren't practical in Thailand."

"Don't worry about it."

"At least you'll be able to catch up with Jennie tonight and Jisoo doesn't know you're here either right?"

"I may have wanted to keep it a surprise for her."

"It definitely was one for Jennie. I thought I messaged her about it, but I was so busy, I guess I thought wrong." Rosie states.

Rosie and Jisoo kept in touch with both Jennie and I really well these past years. I'm close to the two of them and Jennie must be just as close. And just to state it one more time to remind myself of how stupid I am, I missed out in a chunk of Jennie's life.

"Chaeyoung."

"Mhm?"

"Is Jennie okay?"

"What do you mean?" she stops jittering in her chair.

"She looks tired. She's skinny. She's been living and managing a café on her own. Is she okay?" I turn away from the falling snow to face my best friend. She averts her gaze to the front of the car to avoid mine.

"It was really hard when her mom passed away. For a long time, Jisoo and I didn't know how to help. That was a while ago though, she's better now." Chaeyoung doesn't like serious talk and she'll do anything she can to do dismiss it or brighten up the mood. Anyway, these kind of talks aren't common between us. Like my best friend, I tend to make the bright side over look everything else. With that in mind, I know I won't get the full answers from her, but I'm afraid to ask them from the person who does have all the answers.