Ch.14

Due to the information Emily had leaked, Adam managed to escape heaven, taking advantage of the absence of all Seraphim. He successfully sneaked out to the garden of the king. Fuck yeah! Finally!

He was more thrilled than he expected. He didn't know he had felt so stifled in heaven this much. Maybe he had just become accustomed to his life, not to be like satisfied. The life in heaven, everybody looked happy except for him who had been meaninglessly struggling to fill his insides with something.

Now he doubted whether he ever belonged there.

Since the seventh extermination had been carried out a few days ago, hell was unusually quiet everywhere. Adam carefully approached, trying to keep quiet. He hadn't put on his mask to avoid drawing attention. He broke into the castle through the window.

Adam came here to find out the answer to the insatiable thirst that had plagued him for his whole life.

Lucifer, the demon, must have cast a spell on him. Maybe since Eden. Only that assumption could explain all the mysteries. For a strong curse like that, it may have called for a place like an altar. Then the place should be hidden in this castle.

Adam's eyes darted to the large ballroom. If he were hiding a secret, where would it be? Maybe not an open space like this. The basement would be the prime candidate, but Adam couldn't find a way downstairs.

So he wandered around the large hall, kitchen, and dining room to start. Every space was too big. He didn't see anything suspicious apart from a bunch of rubber ducks. Those yellow things were literally everywhere. I can't believe that his ex-wife had married a rubber duck pervert, he thought.

He couldn't find anything, so he returned to the main hall. The ceiling must have been more than a hundred feet high. There wasn't a single living being in the huge space. It looked more like a haunted castle than a house. Shit... spooky. Is Lucifer really living here? Alone?

Adam had thought Lucifer had enjoyed the powers of the king and had thrown wild parties every day. Drunken and wasted, decadent, hot like that. But he couldn't find any sign of carpe diem in the castle. What he could see was only hollowness.

He finished scanning the first floor. There was no appropriate place to hide something. Then the next floor. Adam carefully headed upstairs. The King's bedroom would be on this floor. So he had to muffle his steps much quieter.

Even if he did so, every stair made a subtle creak as he stepped on it. Sweat started to run down his back with anxiety.

Adam walked through the arched door and entered the dark hallway. Closed doors lined up down the way. He tiptoed along.

Everywhere he went, the yellow piles caught his eyes. There were far more on this floor. What do all these rubber ducks do? Had the fallen angel been collecting or making these for decades? Wow, perfect. Amazingly pathetic. The king may have been trying his best. It would be the only way he knew. Even the king of hell seemed unsure of how to fill the void.

As Adam looked around there, he felt like he was watching his own insides. Where the only things that remained were the huge emptiness and the miserable evidence, of all the attempts and fights to fill it with whatever.

At the end of the path, there was a door. Light shone through the chinks in the door.

There was barely audible music coming out from behind it.

Is Lucifer staying up? Oh, shit. If he was caught, he didn't want to know what would happen next.

It would be better to go back to the first floor.

As soon as he concluded that, he turned and took a step back.

Quack!

Adam jumped with fright, as the fucking duck toy squeaked under his left foot, echoing through the damn hallway all over. The faint music from the room abruptly stopped.

Fuck, fuck that fucking duckling toy!

Adam was too startled to think. He opened the nearest door to him and rushed into the room to hide.

He leaned against the closed door and put his ear to it, listening for any sound from the hallway. He felt like his heart might explode.

The outside was quiet. Nothing could be heard from there. Maybe Lucifer didn't notice yet...?

If that was the case, it was lucky. The sound was damn big, but Lucifer might not guess that someone had dared to infiltrate into the king's realm. Adam took a deep breath to relax his pounding heart.

Adam thought to himself he may be good at spying. He had just found another talent.

He looked around the room. He was in the bedroom. The clothes and other items on the dressing table had signs of recent use, suggesting it wasn't a guest room, but the king's bedroom.

Then it wasn't safe to stay here any longer. He should went out and down the stairs before Lucifer noticed or came to sleep. Adam grabbed the doorknob and turned it to open the door.

And Lucifer was standing there.

... ...

Adam was too freaked out to scream. The king looked up at him, asking in a low voice.

"What are you doing here?"

Adam had never thought so much in such a short amount of time as he did now. He had to invent something. Oh, fucking god damn it - wait - I'm not wearing my mask! Yeah! He has never seen my bare face, right? And I- I didn't say anything in my usual voice yet, huh?

The moment Lucifer inhaled to say something, Adam shouted an octave higher than usual.

"H-Hi, your highness. Oh, no! Where am I? Umm, I'm supposed to be in heaven. Aww, I don't remember!"

He cupped his own cheeks with his hands and widened his eyes to form the feature of -he believed- an innocent child's image.

It was a heavy silence.

Adam tried to read Lucifer's face.

His half -closed eyes, slightly furrowed brows, slightly opened mouth as if he had lost the words he had to say, turned on this 'What the fuck are you doing?' expression.

Adam's face turned red in embarrassment.

...Shit. Shit! I knew it wouldn't work. I know, fucker! What do you want from me? I had to do anything!

Adam rubbed his face with his hand.

He had been caught by the enemy. Even by the leader of the enemy. He broke the contract and snuck into the castle.

"...Listen, I-""You seem lost, angel."

But Lucifer's answer wasn't what Adam expected to come out. His one hand was in the air like it had nowhere to go.

"Please come in." Lucifer walked into the room, passing by the gawking Adam. Adam furrowed his brow in confusion. Did this poor acting really work? Is he really not recognizing me or is he just... pretending not to do to give me a chance?

Lucifer sat on his bed. He lightly nodded toward the armchair on the opposite side, indicating for Adam to have a seat. Adam hesitated for a few seconds and then slouched into the chair. The bedroom was large as well. That made the king look smaller than before.

"Um, ho-ho... Thank you for your consideration. I'm a lost angel. And then I saw the... light from your room! That's what brought me here. Hehe."

Adam felt so awkward, so he started to say whatever in a weirdly high pitch, only to make the atmosphere more awkward.

"You did," the king's voice said in a dry tone. As Lucifer snapped his finger, a teapot and cups popped up on the side table.

"You must be thirsty from all the roaming. I will send you home after you finish your tea."

The room was too dark for them to see each other well. Only a few candles on the wall and starlight through large windows merely brightened the place. As Adam began to calm down a little, he was reminded of why he was there.

"Um, by the way, what were you doing? If you don't mind."

Maybe witchcraft? Or casting a spell on someone? Adam thought to himself.

"I was making rubber ducks." Lucifer picked up some ducks from the piles.

"It's my only hobby. I have created all of the ducks in this castle. This one spits fire, and that one... spits water."

"A-ha."

Adam didn't know how to react. He was not capable of having a constructive talk with a rubber duck otaku.

"You do... love rubber ducks so much, ho ho!""No, it sucks."

A longer silence followed. The only sound was the teapot pouring tea into his cup. Okay, it sucks. Got it. Adam gave up on small talk. He sipped his tea as slowly as he could to stall time so that he could get any clue. If he couldn't find anything, he had come here for nothing. No way.

Then he realized Lucifer was staring at him drinking. "Shouldn't you be more careful? I could have poisoned your tea."

"Hm? Did ya?" Adam asked, still drinking it."Of course not. But I could have."

Lucifer had a point. He was the king of hell, and now Adam was a stray angel. It was true that he was in the enemy's domain. Dangerous... maybe? Adam shrugged. But he couldn't think that Lucifer would hurt him. Even though he suspected Lucifer, at the same time, he felt Lucifer wouldn't harm him now. He didn't know why. There had been so many 'whys' he couldn't understand for decades.

...Yeah, it sucked. He thought he could get any piece of information if he investigated the castle firsthand. But he couldn't have found anything. The confusion inside him only got deeper. Some emotions were boiling up beneath him, but he couldn't even know the names of them. He hated it so much. He started to hear the buzzing in his ears again.

"I was glad to meet you."

Lucifer stood up, pointing at the air. A portal was created in front of the door. Adam realized he had already finished his tea.

"Goodbye, mister. Don't come here again."

"Uh, yeah. Of course. Thanks." Adam stood up in a hurry. He just replied in his original low voice, forgetting to imitate the weird voice.

He walked toward the portal. It was only a few steps away, but he felt it was much farther. Something was pounding in his veins. Frustration overwhelmed him. He couldn't leave without an answer.

Why does Lucifer let me go? Why does he just sit back and watch always? I had come to meet him again. Again.

Before Adam took the last step to the portal, he laughed awkwardly, as if making a joke.

"Um... Honestly, your highness. I'm a very, very famous angel in heaven, haha! Surprise. So I- I thought you would recognize me."

"I'm afraid but I don't know. Take care."

Adam was standing right in front of the portal. He spread his hand toward the portal.

"You don't know?""No.""LIAR!"

Adam suddenly burst out shouting. An angelic beam shot from his finger and the portal shattered with a sharp crash.

"You lied to me, you lied to me!"

He strode forward to the king, his rage exploding as he shouted like thunder. Lucifer was startled and stepped back.

"Adam, calm-"

"What have you done to me, bastard!" Adam smacked Lucifer's cheek with his fist. Lucifer stumbled back from the attack. He instinctively raised an arm to defend himself.

But soon, he lowered his guard.

"Coward! I hate you. You are the most hated by all creatures!"

This time Adam pushed him hard by the shoulder. He fell backward defenselessly, hitting his head on the bed frame.

The king moaned in pain. Then he started to chuckle sarcastically. He struggled to his feet.

"Well, your first wife didn't seem to hate..."

Blood dribbled on his lips. He might have been injured inside his mouth from that punch. But he even didn't try to protect himself. That made Adam even angrier.

"Or the second."

Adam raised his fist to punch Lucifer again, but the fallen angel merely took the hit, falling onto the bed. Lucifer rather wanted to be blamed. He wanted to be blamed by Adam for the terrible choices he had made.

Adam struck Lucifer's chest, but the blow was much weaker this time. The king could have easily neutralized Adam, but he didn't. Without his magic power, the king's body was just like a normal human's. Adam's fist only touched Lucifer's soft skin in vain. Adam started to feel he was hurting a small and weak being. He hopped onto Lucifer, straddling him.

"Do something, for fuck's sake!"

He grew angrier. Why? The king could kill him with just a snap of his fingers. Why doesn't he fight back? Why doesn't he hurt me?

"Say something!"

The last hit wasn't even an attack. He raised his fist aggressively, then only pressed it firmly against Lucifer's chest.

Adam huffed and lowered his forehead onto the fallen angel's chest. He grabbed Lucifer's arm and clenched the clothes.

"Please..."

Adam wasn't blaming anymore. It sounded more like begging. He was crouching on Lucifer, whispering it like a prayer.

"Let me completely hate you."

Adam couldn't see the angel's face. Just as Lucifer couldn't see Adam's.

Lucifer was staring at the ceiling, lying on the bed. And he glanced down at the weak, poor lamb on top of him.

Adam's hair softly tickled Lucifer's neck, and he wished he could stop his heartbeat so that Adam couldn't hear it.

They didn't say anything for a long time.

Adam opened his mouth in a cracked voice.

"I saw a white horse. When I was in Eden. I'd forgotten it..."

Then Adam started a long story.

"I was wandering the cliff. I wasn't scared of falling. I think I rather hoped whatever happened, at that time.

But then the horse came to me. As if he wanted me to ride on him. So I did, we ran through the green field. It was... beautiful. And then he got me off the hill. I felt he had something to say, but he was gone."

Adam took a deep breath. He kept telling the story in a low voice that only Lucifer, the fallen angel, could hear.

"Every time I let myself wander off, something has found me and helped me. And left before I could thank them. I thought I had a guardian star. Because I believed the stars were there for me at that moment. The guardian star looked down at me, protecting me all along.

But one day, the protection disappeared. I have searched for the star for so long. But it never came back. So I thought I was deserted. And now that I think about it, it was... around the same time when you left Eden."

Adam clenched his fists tighter, struggling to keep his voice from shaking.

"Lucifer, you really don't know? I've been searching for the answer my whole life, so badly. I've been looking for what I lost. Something, so precious to me."

His shoulders subtly trembled. He pressed his forehead a little harder against Lucifer, as if Lucifer's heart could give him an answer. He asked the question once more.

"Really, really you don't know? Anything?"

Lucifer shut his eyes once, like someone trying to wake up from a dream. If only I could tell Adam. How wonderful would it be?

If I could pull Adam's shoulder to me, confess the numerous words that I had to swallow for so long, and hold him in my arms just once more. Just like before.

But Lucifer couldn't. So he just rested both hands on the bed, which were never allowed to reach Adam.

Lucifer curled his hands into fists tightly. His fingernails dug into his palms.

He finally opened his lips. Then he said the only word that he could give Adam, again.

"I don't know, Adam. I'm sorry."

Lucifer let it out, and then couldn't inhale for a few seconds.

Adam straightened himself. He paused.

And got out of the bed. Adam raised a hand to create a portal by himself. Adam paused one more time, as if waiting for something.

But soon, he left for heaven without looking back.

Lucifer became alone again.

In the middle of the huge room, with the mess of crashed walls and hurts on his face, along with the familiar void.

He was left behind amidst this hell.