Brandy

<SFTC: Brandy by Looking Glass>

Chapter 18

The next few days are worse than it could be with Tanner around. At least with Tanner I had someone to care about me. Now i have no one to look after me, no one to keep me on my toes like Tanner did. I settled with the guy at the bar, whose name I found out was Luke. He was a good person to talk to but I couldn't stay in there drinking forever. So I'd accept Luke's invitation to drive me home and from there I'd manage to get myself into bed and up the next morning sober.

Tanner also hadn't returned to his room to pick up any of his stuff, which gives me a fleeting hope that he might come back. I mean, he has to, right? Its his clothes.

Austin, on the other hand, was gone. After I had said my goodbyes the day of the fight, I couldn't go back. For one, it was too late to go over there and even if I could, I was drunk and they'd already pulled the plug. I was in no mood for watching paperwork and my parents desperately clinging to the lifeless form of Austin.

The doorbell brings me from my random reverie to the dense point of where I'm petting Meredith in my lap. I don't even remember her jumping into my lap.

I push my hair out of my face and stand, walking over to the door, half-expecting to see Tanner carrying flowers and saying he's sorry. For what escapes me because I'm the one who should be apologizing.

Luke stands in the doorway, hands dug into his skinny jeans, gazing up at me from his current stare at the ground.

"Taylor; hey, sorry barging in like this but I was wondering if we could talk?" He asks, his lips disappearing into his mouth momentarily, just to reappear a second later. He has his black earrings in now, ones that I had only seen on one other occasion.

"Um, yeah, sure. Come in," I awkwardly usher him into the living room, unsure what he wants to talk about. We had only talked when I was well over drunk and I highly doubt we have anything in common to talk about. He'd just bring me home after I was done babbling about the same things that have been going on in my life for the past week and he'd say some sort of a sorry and life goes on in the morning. "So what's up?"

"About the drinking thing we have going-" he starts, sitting down on the couch.

"I'm not an addict, I swear, just a coping thing for a limited time,"

"-Not about that, Taylor. I know you just got out of that relationship with that douche of a guy, Tanner but I was just wondering if you might wanna go see a movie or something?" He asks, smirking a little. I actually almost fall off the couch. I understand the way he might've thought I like him but he's got to understand that I'm a little flirty even when I'm not drunk.

I stand up as quickly as I sat down, "Okay, for one, Tanner is not the douche. If anyone is, it's me because the whole ordeal was my fault. And two, you may be nice but that's it, Luke. All I know about you is that I've talked to you relentlessly for the past few days in a drunken/hormonal rage. But I can't just run straight back into a different relationship when I'm honestly still in love with Tanner." I say, cutting off after I realize what I just said. Love. I'm in love with him. I didn't even realize after it was blantantly in front of my face. And I let him go, I told him to go. It took me having to go through all this and actually having him leaving to make me realize that I love him.

Usually I'm quick to fall in love but with Tanner, I've waited to say it because I wanted to make sure that I was sure about it. I wanted to feel it because something was different about him. And now that I feel it, I feel like I might explode into different pieces if I don't just go tell him.

Luke says something quietly enough that I can't catch it through all the things buzzing through my head, and walks out. I suppose it's something about that he's sorry for whatever. He's a nice guy, a really nice guy but he's no Tanner. I don't ever want to date anyone else because no other guy will get me like he does.

I dial his number, the one littering my missed calls list. Crying beats facing problems, is what I've learned.

"Tanner," I breathe.

"Alis- I mean, Taylor. What's wrong?" The lovely voice I've become accustomed to is ragged and sounds like he'd been beaten to a pulp emotionally as well as physically.

"No, please, call me Alison. Call me anything you want. Where are you right now?"

••A/N

Really short chapter, sorry! Nothing much to add onto it