Chapter 5

"Have you written anything recently?" "I have." "Annnnd?" "You can hear it soon. Not now." He dismissed. "How come I have to show you but you don't have to show me?" "If you show me yours, I'll show you mine." Cody smirked.

"I'm being serious. Stop being dirty." I pushed him. "I didn't ask you to show it to me. You just showed me but I will share it with you. Not now though." "What shall we do?" I asked. "You're not gonna make me leave?" He sounded shocked. "If you going didn't leave me home alone I would make you go." "You don't have to be so strong all the time, Lauren." "I just told you I was scared of being home alone."

Cody let out a sigh. "You're afraid to admit that you don't want me to leave. The reason you're afraid to do it is because you're afraid of rejection." "I'm tired of people thinking they know what I'm thinking. I'm not a book, you can't read me." I got off the bed.

"You can block me out all you want but you know I will find the weakest part of your wall and knock it down again." "Stop with your riddles. They confuse me." I said. Cody pulled me onto his lap.

"You're a very special girl, you know that?" "How special?" "I can't even put it into words." He whispered with his lips to my ear. I turned to kiss him but he pushed me away. "Don't reject me." I begged. "It messes with your head." "You're like a drug." "I'm sorry." "Just kiss me?" "I can't." He shook his head.

"You can. Last night you kissed me. Last night you did more than just kiss me." "We were drunk." "It meant nothing?" "It was everything I've wanted for the last two months. Picturing it didn't compare to going through with it. It's as if your body is sculptured to fit mine. We fit together. It works." He laid back.

I got off his lap and rested my head on the pillow. Cody rested his head in my lap. I played with his hair as I took in all of his features. Beauty at it's purest. "Maybe someone up there wants us to fight for each other." Cody broke the silence after what felt like forever.

"Why do we have to fight this hard?" "Our love is strong enough to make it through." "I want you, Cody." I felt tears form in my eyes. "Then have me." "It's not that easy." "I'll earn your trust." "I'm scared that maybe I won't be able to trust you again." I wiped away a tear which had escaped my eye.

Cody sat up and ran his hand up my leg. He paused as he noticed bumps on my right hip. I closed my eyes tightly hoping he wouldn't expose my skin. He pulled my boy shorts down to uncover my hip. "Lauren.." He gasped in a hushed tone.

"I- You weren't supposed to see that." I pushed his hand away. "Why would you- How long ag- Is that my fault?" He managed to choke. I shrugged my shoulders. Cody examined my wrists and the rest of my body. "I needed to find a place where my scars wouldn't be seen." I told him.

Cody couldn't find words to say. He just stared. He had glossy eyes. I knew it wouldn't be long until tears escaped. "I tried not to but physical pain is easier to deal with than emotional pain. This isn't your fault. It's not. I promise. You're not the only one who's caused pain these last few months. Please don't blame yourself."

He got up and walked towards the wall. I watched in silence as he rested his forehead on the wall. Cody clenched his fists. I jumped as he punched the wall. He did it again. "Stop! You're going to hurt yourself!" I jumped off the bed and stood in the small gap between him and the wall.

"You've hurt yourself." He couldn't look me in the eye. "My baby.." He whispered. I wiped his tears away. "Why didn't I notice them last night? You were completely naked yet I was too focused on the pleasure to realize you were broken. I'm so selfish." He shook his head at himself.

"You made me feel good. I haven't felt that in a while. I felt comfortable. Don't be mad at yourself for what you didn't do." "You're a beautiful young girl. You know that? You're out of this would. So beautiful. Inside and out. So precious." He cupped my face. "I'll get us through this. We'll make it." "Keep me safe." I begged.

"I plan to." He smiled slightly. "Do you want pancakes?" I offered. "It's three in the morning." Cody checked his watch. "Let's go." I grabbed his hand and pulled him downstairs. I searched the cupboards and got out the correct ingredients.

"Can you flip them?" Cody asked while I poured the mix in the pan. "No." I shook my head. "Try it." He said, I nodded and prepared. "If this goes wrong, you have to clean it up." I looked at him before tossing the pancake in the air. Cody and I looked at each other. The pancake was stuck to the ceiling. I giggled which made Cody laugh.

"Catch it!" Cody said but it was too late. I laughed and poured more into the pan. "You come do it." Cody got up and took the pan off me. He flipped it and caught it. "That's not fair! You're good at everything." "Come here." He pulled me over to him. Cody stood with his arms around me. We both held onto the pan.

"On three we're gonna go like this." He showed me a gentle action. I nodded. Cody counted down and we did it. "Okay, don't put your ass into it as much." He laughed. "Nearly knocked me out." He joked which made me laugh.

"Imma try on my own." I pushed him away and stood facing him. "Careful." I flipped it but didn't catch it. I laughed and looked up at Cody. "I think we should just do it normally now." I giggled and started over. Cody cleaned up my mess before getting out a plate for the pancakes.

"This is good. We should buy our own house and eat pancakes at three in the morning wearing minimal clothing." I announced. Cody nodded. He finished his mouthful. "And we should go swimming in our pool at four in the morning with nothing on." "And paint the house all kinds of colors." "With a soft room. Where there's pillows and blankets and teddies and a TV to watch." "While we eat nutella in our underwear."

"We'd be alright living together, aye?" Cody looked at me. "Until you start leaving your shit around the place." I rolled my eyes playfully. "In my bedroom I can leave my clothes where I want." "You have a closet for a reason." "I still live at home, that's what Mom's for." He grinned.

"You're lucky you're cute." I laughed. "You do realize that you've got school tomorrow?" Cody reminded. "It's almost four." "It's time for our dip in the pool." "Lauren.." "I'm not going." "Yes you are." "I'm not." "You need every second you can get in that school. Don't waste it." "Would you stop focusing on trying to be a wise young man and just be a teenager?" I sighed.

"I'm sorry." "Good." I smiled and put the plate in the dishwasher. "Are you coming to bed?" "I need the bathroom." "Okay." I went back to my bedroom. There was an unknown number calling my phone. I hesitantly answered it. "Hello?" "Lauren?" A deep, all-too-familiar voice rang in my ears like an alarm.

I dropped the phone and stumbled backwards. "Nooo.." I whispered. "No what?" Cody came into the room. "Why's your phone on the floor?" He picked it up and passed it to me. I stared at the phone. "Wait.." Cody noticed the call. "Did you know you were ringing a random number?" He hung up and threw it on the bed.

"Aye?" Cody snapped his fingers. I didn't even flinch. "What's wrong?" He tried to pull me close but I pushed back forcefully. "Please don't touch me." I refused. "Lauren, what's going on?" "Just please don't." I pleaded.

"Hey, why are you frightened?" He noticed I was shaking. "Who was on the phone?" Cody reached for my hand. I quickly moved it away. "I'm not going to hurt you. I'm safe. You're safe." "I'm not safe. Not anymore." I shook my head.

"Of course you are, silly." "No." "Why not?" "How did he get my number?!" I raised my voice. "How did who get your number?" "He sounded angry. What if he wants to hurt me?! He might be planning to go through with what he started." I looked around the room frantically.

"Calm down, Lauren." Cody told me. "Don't let him near me? Okay?! Don't let me out of your sight. Never leave my side. Keep me safe. Sleep with me in your arms and never let me go. I'm begging you. Don't let him get to me!" It felt like the world was spinning around. I could barely stand and then everything went black.

I woke up in the darkness with blankets over me. I sat up and looked around the room. "Cody?!" I cried out. He appeared within seconds. "Breathe. Don't let yourself get worked up again. Don't do it to yourself." "I think he's going to come for me."

"Who?" "What if he comes while I'm at school? You won't be there to stop him from hurting me. Or even taking me away. He might drive us somewhere in his car and keep me there. He's going to do all the things he did to me before. This time nothing's going to stop him." I blabbered. Cody was too confused to say anything.

"Do you promise not to let him take me?" "Lauren, who are you talking about? Who was on the phone? If you're this scared then why did you ring them?" "He rung me! I don't know how he got my number. Maybe he's got some undercover spy."

"We're not in some movie, this is real life. No one is going to take you anywhere or do anything to you." "You don't get it, Cody!" "What don't I get?" "He got my new number. He's going to get me too." "Who is he?!" "Josh!"