Chapter 16

Chris

I'm meant to be working... but I just can't. The only thing on my mind is Sophie. I feel like this way too often. I mean, there's so much to think about. What happened to her before I had picked her up two nights ago, her sleeping in my bed, Han finding out, and of course dancing together... but one thing has been on my mind more than everything else.

What did she mean when she said that that video of me changed everything?

I've been racking my brain, but absolutely nothing comes to mind. Was she watching videos of me online or something? What did it change? I'm just confused.

So that's what I've been doing. Sitting in my room, overthinking every little detail.

As I sit on my bed, trying to sort out thoughts, my door barges open, Han standing on the other side.

"Han, stop doing that," I catch my breath after, honestly, being jumpscared by Han busting through my door. "I could be naked."

"But you're not," he shrugs, still standing in the doorway.

"But what if I was," I growl, crossing my arms.

"Then I'd walk out of here a happier man," he snorts and I can't help but let out a little chuckle. "Anyway, Sophie's here."

"Oh, tell her Hyunjin's out," I nod, grabbing my phone from the other side of the bed.

"No, she's here for you fuckwit," Han leans on the doorway, a disgusted look on his face.

"Oh," my eyes widen and I stand up, walking towards the hallway, pushing past Han. I notice her sitting on the dorm couch, eyeing around the place. She's wearing her normal attire again, an oversized hoodie, ripped jeans and the shoes I bought her. But today she's wearing a beanie, so I'd like to believe she was inspired by my taste.

"Sophie," I tilt my head to the side, saying her name way more lovingly than I had anticipated. "Do you want to come into my room?"

"Ok," she smiles passively, getting off of the couch, walking towards me. She looks tired today, like she hasn't slept. Her eyes are bloodshot red and she's walking sluggishly, in contrast to her normal upbeat strut.

As she meets me I take her hand, leading her down the hallway behind me. I glare at Han, who is still standing in the doorway as we walk in, aggressively slamming the door in his face. I keep an eye on  Sophie as she walks in, putting her backpack near one of the bed legs.

I sit Sophie and I down on the side of my bed, facing each other, close enough that our knees are touching.

"What's up?" I ask, a warm smile spread across my face.

"I just wanted to be with you," she nods, climbing up the bed onto her knees.

"Yeah?" I reply, being the first word that came to mind as she goes from sitting up in a kneeling position to dropping onto her hands. With her hands positioned besides my waist, she grips onto the sheets, pulling herself over to me and I hold my breath as she clambers onto my lap, her legs by my sides. I grasp onto her thighs, pulling her in closer to me, whilst still trying to cover the fact that I have a raging hard-on.

I adjust her beanie for her as she stares up at me with those big eyes which she always seems to look at me with. She looks so pretty sitting on me like this, so needy... I love the feeling of her being dependent on me.

"Did you want to talk about something?" I ask, brushing over the back of her neck with my thumb. She doesn't respond, but it looks like she's on the cusp of tears. "You can talk to me about anything hm?" I assure her, moving my hands up onto her face.

"I know," she utters under her breath. "It's just... I'm sorry, I was a fucking mess that night."

"Stop saying you're sorry," I brush over her cheeks with the back of my hand.

"But I am," she drops her head, burrowing into my shoulder. "It wouldn't have happened if I wasn't so fucking stupid."

"Why would you say that?" I question, placing my hands on the back of her head as she continues to rest on my shoulder.

"I took a drink from the guy, what did I expect," she chuckles awkwardly, her voice muffled against my skin.

"It's not your fault," I pat her beanie, moving my hands down onto her back. "A normal person wouldn't have done that, he's the fucked up one, not you."

"I know but..."

"But what?" I scoff, rocking the both of us side to side, trying to calm myself down.

"But I should've known," she lifts her head, looking at me with bloodshot eyes, tears streaming down her face.

"Have you talked to anyone else about this?" I ask after realising just how much stress this is causing her. She genuinely worries me sometimes.

"Only you," she responds, lowering her head in shame.

"Not even Lin?"

"Especially not Lin," she answers, trying to respond with a smile, failing miserably.

"Ok," I end the conversation, realising the best thing I can do for her at this moment is to support her. She nuzzles her face into my shoulder again, her hands gripping onto my shirt.

"I was thinking about what you said," she lifts her head to look at me, her face still flushed. "Maybe I should audition for JYPE."

"Yes, you should," I exclaim, holding her hands in mine. "Do you want me to talk to Kevin about it for you?"

"Nah, I will. Kevin owes me one anyway," she shrugs.

"For what?" I chuckle awkwardly, racking my brain.

"For editing the video remember?" She shakes her head, acting like she's disappointed in me.

"Oh, right sorry, I forgot that you edited the video..." My voice drifts off, my head deep in thought within a matter of seconds. That video, right, shit how'd I forget. "Sophie?"

"Yeah?"

"I was drunk in the video right?" I question her, brushing my hair back, still caught up in my own thoughts.

"Yeah," she answers reluctantly.

"Did I do anything... like weird in the video?" I grit my teeth, not knowing what to expect from her response as she pauses to think for a second.

"Um," she sighs, biting on her lower lip as she thinks. "There was... one thing."

"Shit, what'd I do?" I chuckle, my cheeks going red in embarrassment, a smile on my face.

"Um," she gulps, my smile immediately dropping, realising I could've actually done something pretty bad. "I don't really know how to tell you."

"Oh," I nod my head slowly, trying to work out what I could've done that would make her react this sensitively. "Um, can you show me?"

"Yeah, that would probably be easier," she nods, immediately pulling her laptop case out of her backpack. As sits her laptop on her lap and begins searching through her files, an awkward silence surrounds the room.

"Um, sorry," she exhales, tapping on the side of her laptop. "I just, um, before you watch this, I want you to know... I'm not angry or anything and you were drunk so it doesn't matter..."

"Okkk," I breathe, waiting for her to play the video. She turns the computer around, showing me the first frame of a 5 minute long video. The first frame of the video shows me sitting on the side of my bed, leaning back onto my elbows.

"Can I leave... or?" She asks nervously, fidgeting with the back of her laptop.

"Sure, if you're not comfortable," I nod, watching her get off of the bed and walk out of my bedroom, the door slamming behind her. I hover my finger over the spacebar, taking a breath in as I press play.

I watch the video, waiting for something to happen. The first half-minute or so is just me sitting there, acting drunk. Is the 'weird thing'me being drunk? I'm confused.

"Chan," Han barges into my room, my door swinging at top speeds into the wall and I immediately look back at him. "You know Sophie le..." his voice drifts off, his head tilting to the side.

"Huh, Sophie what?" I question, urging him to finish his sentence.

"What the fuck are you watching!" Han exclaims and you realise he's staring at your computer screen. Your head whips back to the screen on instinct and your jaw drops as you see the video.

She watched this?? SOPHIE WATCHED THIS? Fuck, she probably thinks I'm a horny fucking pervert weirdo fucking manslut who jerks off 24/7... HOLY FUCKBALLS KILL ME NOW WHY THE FUCK DID DRUNK-ME DO THIS???

"AGHAH MY EYES, GIVE ME BLEACH!" Han rubs his eyes, turning around to face the hallway. "Why the fuck are you watching yourself jerk off?"

"I wasn't!" I shout defensively, slamming the laptop shut.

"What the fuck dude," he whines, still facing away from me.

"J-just," I stammer, looking for anything to say at this moment. "What were you going to say?"

"Bro," Han sulks, leaning onto the wall of the hallway. "Sophie left."

"As in like, left my room?" I question optimistically and suddenly every thought in my head is about Sophie, completely disregarding the fact that Han and I just watched myself jerking off.

"No, the apartment," Han shakes his head, walking back to his room.

My brows furrow, realising she just left without her backpack and belongings.

Weird...

Author's Note

Heyy... sorry for the late upload... I've been sick + really really busy so I didn't even think I could get this chap out by the weekend. I haven't really proofed properly so if you notice anything, feel free to tell me!!

TYSM for 5k my loves <3

Have an amazing day <: