Chapter 54

"Y-you what?" I stuttered out backing away from her.

"I can't have kids." She said barely above a whisper breaking the eye contact we had. I stepped back just looking at her trying to process what she just said. "I-I'm so sorry Ni."

"I just, you, you can't have kids?" I asked in disbelief. "Oh my gosh."

She just sood there looking as if she was about to crumble but for once I felt like I could do nothing. This was completely out of my control. "Can we just go home, please?"

"You can't have kids? Like no babies... nothing." I ran my hands through my hair tugging at the ends of it. 

"Niall I just want to go home." She pleaded her voice cracking. What was wrong with me? Why was I acting like this?

I walked away from her over to where the car was getting in as I watched her walk toward the car slowly climbing into the seat next to me. She slammed the door shut resting her head against the window as the car started pulling away from the curb. 

I could hear her quiet little sobs and whimpers as I stared out the window. Why was I not comforting her? What was wrong with me?

I can't. I don't know why I just can't. "N-Niall we're here." Her voice broke me out of my thoughts on how big of a douche I was being. I nodded getting out of the car as she did, paying the driver. We walked up to the bus waiting for the bus driver to open the door. 

"Hey you guys are back! We were just going to get dinner." Liam smiled as I walked in Kaylee trailing behind me. I didn't tell the boys where we were going or why so they were lost when they saw her walking in crying.

"Kayls what's wrong?" Harry questioned but she ignored him pushing past and going into the bathroom.

I walked over to the couch sitting down and resting my head in my hands. "Care to explain?" Zayn chuckled lightly. 

"Kaylee thought she was pregnant." I spoke up taking a deep breath. "She took tests and they confused her so she went to the doctors today. She found out that... that she uh.."

"Spit it out Niall." Louis urged on sitting next to me.

"She can't have kids." I blurted out. "She can't have fucking kids, like, ever! Never will she have kids." 

The room got eerily quiet as they just exchanged glances. "Why are you not in there with her?" Harry asked. "I mean yeah it looks like you're taking it hard man but she's the one that can't have kids. Do you know what that could do to her? And here you are sitting out here moping about it?" Harry let out a laugh in disbelief. "You can leave her, find another girl that can have kids but she, she's stuck with it. So man up and go be there for her." 

I looked up at Harry my mouth falling open. He was right. He was completely right. I was acting selfish... like it was about me not having kids. 

I got up off the couch walking over to the bathroom and knocking on the door lightly. "Kayls why don't you come out and talk, yeah?"

"I'm fine Niall." She answered back her voice a bit shaky.

"You're not fucking fine Kaylee." I spat. "Get out here because I'm not going to have you sit in there alone." The door slowly opened revealing her messed up hair and her puffy red eyes. I pulled her into a hug, holding her as tight as I could. "It's going to be okay."

"No, no it's not Niall." She looked up at me her lip quivering. "What reason do you have to be with me now? I mean when you're in a relationship it's either going to lead to getting married or a break up yeah? Well you always told me how much you couldn't wait to be married and start a family and have children but you can't do that with me!" She cried letting her self out of the embrace.

"I'm with you cause I love you." I shook my head smiling. "Yeah, it sucks you can't have kids. But I'm not going to leave you just because of that. I'm in love with you, I don't just love you. Okay? Yes, I want kids very badly but there are other options. It's fine. You're fine." 

"I love you." She smiled using the back of her hand to wipe away the mascara stains under her eyes.

"And I love you too babe." I grinned grabbing her face and smashingg my lips into hers.

I grabbed her hand tugging her out to where all the other boys were sitting. "You okay Kayls?" Harry asked smiling at her. She nodded looking over at me as I gave her a wink. 

"Alright let's go out to dinner yeah? I'm starving!" Liam groaned. We all nodded agreeing as we made our way down to a little pub around the corner that seemed to have good food. We all got seated in a roun booth toward the back.

"What can I get to drink for you?" A girl with a very thick scottish accent asked us. 

"Uh I think we'll just have waters all around." Louis spoke up nobody disagreeing. She nodded heading off back into the kitchen. 

"Have you talk to Ryan lately?" Louis asked looking up from his menu.

"Nope, I was going to skype him soon. Mayne tonight would be good." Kaylee told Louis a big smile on her face. "I  miss him so much, wow." 

"Me too." I nudged her giving her a smile. "Hopefully we can go visit him soon."

"Alrighty then, here are your waters. Are you all ready to order?" The girl asked pulling out a notepad from her apron. We all took turns going around the table telling her our orders. 

"I have to use the bathroom, I'll be back." Kaylee told me as we slid out of the booth. She went off around the corner before Harry spoke up.

"Okay so, I was looking online and I was reading some articles about women who can't have children. They say that at first they'll be fine, think nothing of it, have no worries, they 'get over it'. Wrong. There's a turning point. They'll just wake up one day and be a different person and it all goes downhill from there." Harry rushed out quickly reading from his phone.

"Nah, Kayls isn't like that. She's strong and she said she was fine. I believe her." I smiled taking a sip of water.

"Whatever you say mate." Harry rolled his eyes shoving his phone back into his pocket as Kaylee came back. 

She smiled as I got out letting her slide back into the booth. "So whens your next show boys?"

"Uh tomorrow night and then we flight over to new york to do a bunch of shows on the east coast." Liam told her all of us nodding. 

The waitress came back serving all of our food out and we ate in mostly silence the occasional conversation starting up.

"I can't wait to get back to the bus! I want to skype Ryan." Kaylee bubbled bouncing in her seat. 

"Well I'm done and it looks like everyone else is. I'll go pay and we can go." Zayn got out of the booth getting up and walking over to the cash register. We all slid out following him as the cashier handed him the reciept. 

When we got to the bus Kaylee ran to the back grabbing my laptop and opening up skye searching for my cousins name. Louis say down next to her and me on the other side.

The little thing started ringing before my cousins face showed up on the screen. "Hey guys!" She smiled waving at the camera.

"Hey, how are you?" Kaylee asked back resting the laptop on the table. 

"Good, good. Ryans just about out of the bath I'll go get him. He has not gone a day without talking about you guys."  She giggled before walking away from the screen. "Ryan theres a few people that want to talk to you!" We heard her scream. "It's Kaylee, Louis and Niall!"

There was a big thud before Ryan came into view butt naked running toward the screen. "Kaylee!" He squealed as Lia came over and wrapped a towel around him.

"Ryan, ah I miss you bud." Kaylee placed her hands over her mouth smiling. Her eyes were all teared up just from seeing him.

"Louis you will never believe it! Mommy Lia bought me a playhouse that looks like a pirate ship! I can't wait till you come so we can play pirate!" Ryan grinned jumping up and down. "And Niall daddy patrick said that he was going to sign me up for football!"

"That's great Ry. When we come visit we'll play yeah?" I chuckled as Ryan nodded his head. 

"Ryan come get your jammys on!" Patrick called from the bedroom.

"I'll be right back guys, don't go anywhere." He turned around running as quick as he could.

"He's such a good kid. We've had little to no problems with him really. Thank you so much. I mean we're so grateful for him. Not being able to have kids and all was really hard for us and it made times a little tough before Ryan came along." Lia smiled sitting down in front of the camera.

"Mhm." Kaylee mumbled nodding. I rested my hand on her back rubbing is soothingly. 

"When I first found out I couldn't I was almost sure Patrick was going to leave me. I mean who wants to be with someone that can't have kids? If we weren't married when I found out he probably would've been gone." Lia laughed half heartidly. 

Kaylee stood up pushing past me and running out of the room. "Did I say something?" Lia asked concerned.

"No uh, Kaylee went to the doctors today and uh well found out she can't have kids." I scratched the back of my neck as a look of pure horror fell over Lia's face.

"I'm such a bitch." She groaned covering her face. 

"No it's fine. You didn't know... I'll be back." I got up and Louis slid in front of the camera as I heard Ryan's voice. 

I walked through the bus looking for Kaylee when I saw her outside. I stepped off the bus walking toward her. She was leaned up against the bus her face in her palms.

"Kayls, she didn't know..." I whispered walking up to her and pulling her into a hug.

"I want you to break up with me Niall." Kaylee cried. 

"Wha- Why?" I stepped back my eyes wide.

"Because I know you don't want to be with me, okay. It's fine. Don't feel obligated to date me."

"Kayls, I'm not breaking up with you." I chuckled shaking my head. "Never. I don't care that you can't have kids. I said it was fine. I love you."

"I love you too but-" I cut her off as I pushed her up against the bus our lips pressed together. 

"But nothing." I smiled out foreheads resting against eachother.

ALRIGHT COMMENT AND VOTE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER ALSO I HAVE A QUESTION. WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF A CHAPTER THAT HAS A DIRTY PART? JUST A SMALL PART OF IT AND ILL DO WARNING AND STUFF BUT YEAH, WOULD YOU GUYS MIND?