20. Trading Places

When I wake up the next day, I see school started an hour and a half ago. Usually, I'd freak, but today I really don't care.

I stand up and walk over to the door, opening it a crack. My mom's sitting at the island.

Slowly, I open the door more and walk out to her. She turns when she hears my footsteps.

"Hey, My Love," she says.

"Why didn't you wake me up? And why didn't my alarm go off?"

"You really wanted to go to school today?" she asks.

I shake my head. "Thanks, I guess."

"Sit," she says, more seriously this time, motioning to the stool next to her. When I do, she continues. "I know you won't wanna do this. But I think it might help you."

I hate the way she started that. But I feel more willing now that I know all her secrets. Maybe it's more for her peace of mind than mine.

"What?"

"I called Dr.Huang. He said that if you want, you can come to the precinct later today and can talk on him."

I nod and look at the island's countertop. I know she's seriously worried about me. And maybe I'm blind to my own feelings and how they're affecting me. I agree, knowing whatever Huang tells me I won't want to hear.

~*~*~*~*~*~

"What are you thinking about, Ellie?"

My voice is barely over a whisper. "The last time I was in here, Ashley was barely conscious."

"She's safe and healthy now," he reminds me.

"I know. But...I guess I'm having trouble adjusting."

"Why's that?"

"Everything's different now. I don't see my best friend anymore. I can't pass notes with her. I can't walk and talk with her in the halls or home from school. Jordyn's usually at school but we just aren't as close anymore I guess. Coming here is scaring me..." I trail off, running out of examples.

"It's a difficult transition to be going through in only a few day's time," he says, nodding.

"No kidding. I just...I don't think anything is wrong with me. But something is definitely wrong."

*Olivia's POV*

"She's still adjusting. But I would request to the school to make sure these girls...whoever they are and Ellie are separated as best as possible," Huang says. "What are they're names?"

I draw a blank. Rollins comes up to us. "Uh she told me Karen and Claire," she says.

"You remembered that in the mile long spiel she-"

"Yes."

"Well, she seems to open up to you more, I guess." I sigh. "When did my daughter stop trusting me?"

"Liv," Amanda says. "You're the most important thing in the world to her! How could you say that?"

"It's like when you make children's parents leave the room to question them," Huang starts. "Whether it's humiliation, guilt, or just plain discomfort, some children-"

"Yeah, I get that," I interrupt. "I just want my daughter back. That's all." I half laugh. "Maybe I should just send her to live with you every time I think she's hiding something, Rollins."

"That's actually not a bad idea," Huang tells us. "Healing-wise, anyways."

I feel heartbreak in my chest. "What do you mean?"

"It's a different routine. She loves Amanda. It's always recommended to change things up when one is down. I'm not saying you have to agree to it whatsoever." He puts his hands up as if to tell us it was maybe even a joke.

I look over at Amanda. Her face is unreadable. "I'm home as much as you are. I don't see how it would help her." Does she agree?

"Different environments. It's a whole new routine without trying. Different walks to and from school. Different bed, different kitchen, bedroom, bathroom. Different people seen daily..." Huang offers.

"She doesn't like change," I say.

"What's ever changed in her life? Besides what's happened lately, what difference has she had to face?"

"Elliot would've been in her life past age six if he didn't leave."

"That affected you, Liv. She didn't even remember him."

I roll back on my feet. I can't handle thinking my daughter won't live with me. I had four more years.

"It's temporary, Liv. A few weeks, tops. We can try a couple nights. We don't have to try at all. It's all up to you."

I look over at my best friend again.

"You know she's always welcome at me house. No matter what," she says.

I nod. I've always known that. I've always known Amanda and Ellie have had some bond that I had no idea could be so strong. I've always known Ellie would go to her with anything. I just never had reason to fully believe it.

It only has to be a couple days. "Are you sure this could help her?"

"Yes, it helps lots of kids for lots of reasons. I've seen shrinks transfer foster kids to other homes because of depression, even if they were in good homes. It's why when people move after attacks they feel better."

"Liv, it's not forever. You'll have her back before her birthday. Probably way before that," Amanda tells me.

Her birthday. Jeez, that's like...in 6 weeks. My baby is gonna be 15.

"Okay. We'll see what she says."

~*~*~*~*~*~

"Do I have to?" she asks quietly.

"No, of course not. We just wanted to see if it would help your coping."

She nods. "For how long?"

"No more than a few weeks at most. We wanted to try it for a couple days. And if it helps, you could stay a little longer."

She looks up. Not at me, but at Rollins, who is to my right.

"It's fine, Babydoll. You know you're always welcome over," she says, reaching out to touch her hand.

She takes a breath. "Okay," she agrees.

*Ellie's POV*

Is this my way of getting thrown out? Or is this seriously supposed to help? I don't know.

All I know is within an hour of my talk with Dr.Huang, I'm packing up a suitcase, a duffel bag, and my backpack for Amanda's.

I want Mom to take me, but she gets called to the precinct. Amanda comes and picks me up.

The car ride is a seemingly long, awkwardly silent one.

And I have no idea how this is gonna help me. Or if it really will at all.

I've stayed over here before. But I don't really want to for this reason. As soon as I get there, I text Mom we got here fine. It's more for me than her, but whatever.

Amanda tells me it's gonna be fun, it's gonna be alright. But right now, all I wanna do is sleep. So I fake a yawn and make my way to the bed in the guest room and sleep until dinner. We order pizza, because that's all we ever do.

After that she invites me to sit and watch TV. I do it because I know I'm supposed to. And I have to act like it's all fine.

After two days, I feel a bit better. Amanda and I have always been like best friends. And I find myself having legitimate fun. After a week, it seems almost normal.

Jordyn starts talking to me again. More and more as time goes on.

Maybe this moving-apartments thing is helping...or maybe I'm just lying to myself.•••{AN:...Aaaaand that's it for the first story. I know the end kind sucks but that's what the sequel's for! It's in my works if you can't find it, but it is called "Double Jeopardy". Shouldn't be too hard to find. I hope you guys liked this story and like the next one! Love you guys! See you in the next story!}