thirty one

***Dally's POV***

I walk to the Curtis house after a long night at Buck's. I drank all of my sorrows away last night, then went back to my house early this morning. Most of Alex's clothes were gone, but she left her Winston sweatshirt. I was sure to grab it before heading to the Curtis house, just in case she was there.

I felt like shit. I felt like a bug that had just been stepped on, and I still do. Alex was right, all I ever do is go out and party. And come to think of it, most of the times I go, I just wish I was with her. And the fact that I physically and mentally hurt her wasn't okay with me. There is still blood stains on the floor and the coffee table.

I guess I just didn't know what to do. I'm so in love with her it isn't even real anymore. I've never had feelings like these before, and they're making me do stupid things.

I just miss her so much. I want her to come home and be mine again. I've been a total wreck, I smell like alcohol and sweat and old tears. Plus, I haven't changed my clothes. There's beard stubble everywhere and my hair is all over the place.

I reach the Curtis house and walk in. I look up and meet eyes with her.

I open my mouth to say something, but she takes off up the stairs with Victoria close behind her. My heart sinks.

She looked as broken as I was.

I walk over and sit on the couch, head in hands; the same position I've been in for almost 24 hours.

***Alex's POV***

I run upstairs as soon as I see him. I hear footsteps behind me as I burst into Ponyboy and Soda's room. I stop running and my hard breaths turn into sobs.

I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn to see Victoria. Immediately I hug her, and she hugs me back.

"Why does he have to be here?" I say against her shoulder. She begins to softly rub my back.

"I don't know honey," Victoria says.

"I can't see him right now. I'd just bust out in tears. What do I do?" I ask her. She may be 14, but she's one of the best friends I've ever had.

"Alex, be strong. He looked so run down and sad. Ever think maybe he feels awful too?" Victoria asks. I shake my head and try to stop crying. I've been crying too much these days.

"Let's just hang out up here, okay? We'll come down for dinner, then you can sleep on Johnny and I's floor. Sound good?" Victoria asks. I nod my head and we sit on the bed.

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About 3 hours later, Darry calls everyone for dinner. I groan and slowly stand up. Victoria and I were doing each other's hair while we waited.

We slowly walk down the stairs and I notice everyone is in the dining room. No one seems to see the tension between Dallas and me except Victoria.

Darry puts out dinner for the gang and Victoria and I talk with Kayla and Ellie. Kayla sits next to me and keeps her eyes on Dallas. Apparently, his eyes don't leave me at all during dinner.

After dinner, I help Lauren with the dishes, then sit by Kayla. Dallas and Johnny walk outside for a smoke, and Kayla pulls me upstairs with her.

"Let's just go to bed, okay? It's nearly 9, I'll tell Soda to sleep downstairs with Steve, and you and I can sleep up here," she offers. I gratefully accept and she runs off to grab some clothes. I just sit on the bed, not bothering to change out of Ponyboy's hoodie or my blood-drenched shirt sticking to it.

I return and brush my hair out and let it naturally dry in its straight state. Kayla comes in wearing Soda's long sleeved shirt and her own spandex.

We climb into our beds, me on the floor and her in the actual bed. We talk about our lives, our dreams, and our men.

"Alex, I think I might be really into Soda," Kayla says.

"You're lucky, he's really into you too," I say. Kayla smiles, then changes the subject.

"I'm so sorry about this whole Dallas thing. I know how hard it must be for you," Kayla says.

"It's fine, it isn't your fault," I say back.

After a while of talking, she drifts off to sleep. I, however, don't sleep a second. All I think about is Dallas.

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***Dally's POV***

I stare at the ceiling for most of the night. I couldn't get Alex out of my head.

All of a sudden, I hear a crack of lightning, followed by thunder and more lightning.

I shoot up. I know for a fact that Alex is scared to death of thunder and lightning. I know this because it's been really stormy for the past week, and I held her during every one.

I have to help her through this. I can't let her suffer, no matter how broken we are.

I quietly make my way upstairs, listening through the doors to see which room she's in.

I hear sharp breaths that are identical to her own coming from the guest room. I sigh in relief and quietly open the door. 

I scan the room and find the bed empty. I'm assuming Kayla went to sleep with Soda downstairs because of the storm, but where's Alex?

Something slightly shifts on the floor near my feet.

I found her. Thank God.

I crouch down and lift her from the ground while the blankets are still covering her. She moves around in confusion but doesn't remove the blankets from blocking her sight.

I lay her in the bed and pull the comforter over her, then remove the other blankets from her.

Her big, beautiful blue eyes look up at me in terror and I silently lean down and kiss her forehead.

"Did you really think I was going to let my girl suffer up here all by herself during her least favorite thing?" I say softly before sitting next to her. She sits up quickly and buries herself deep into my chest, crawling into my lap so that she has one leg on either side of my waist. She clings to my neck for dear life as I pull her tighter and tighter against me.

"It's okay Beautiful, Dally's got you," I say against her. As the thunder continues, I just continue to hold her tighter.

"Please don't ever let go," she says through tears.

"I can't baby," I say back. "You are my forever." 

She lays her head against my shoulder and I feel her breathing straighten out a little bit.

"Baby, would you like to put your Winston sweatshirt on?" I ask softly.

She pulls away and nods feverishly. I place her carefully back on the bed and go to get it when she stops me.

"You're coming back, right?" she says in a weak voice.

"Of course, baby," I say before bolting downstairs to get the sweatshirt.

When I return, she's bound up in the blankets and as her head buried in the pillow.

"Alex?" I say softly. She stands up and rushes over to me, practically falling into my arms.

I make my way to the bottom of the hoodie she was previously wearing. I remove it, leaving her stomach and chest bare.

"My baby doesn't wear other guys clothes," I insist. She nods as she pulls my sweatshirt over her body. 

I lay on the bed and motion for her to join me. She lays on top of me and snuggles into my shoulder. I drape my arms around her waist.

"You do not know how much I missed doing this with you," I say happily.

"Me too baby," she says contently as I rub my hands on her back. My fingers get caught the bandages on her back. My heart drops

"I'm so sorry baby, I didn't mean to hurt you," I say. "God, I feel so awful..."

"I forgive you, babe, I promise," she replies. I hold her even tighter and tangle our legs together.

"No, I mean it. I shouldn't go out as often as I do. Hell, I shouldn't go out at all. I love our nights together more than anything else, and I don't know why I throw them away to go party. I want to spend every night with you in my arms, watching a movie, and making out, not getting drunk and stumbling home the next morning."

She reaches up and kisses me, a kiss so passionate it makes my insides catch fire. I grab around her waist and deepen the kiss.

"So you'll come home with me tomorrow?" she asks once we pull away.

"Of course, babe," I reply.

I'm about to tell her I love her - my first time saying it, even though I've loved her for some time now - when a tornado siren sounds, telling us there's a tornado in Tulsa.