Ch 137

I woke up suddenly, like surfacing from deep water. My eyes fluttered open to soft light bleeding through a paper window. I didn't know where I was—not at first—but for once, I didn't panic. I just... breathed. 

I feel warm. The kind of warmth that seeps into your bones and makes the world feel far away. I feel calm, like my mind has been washed clean by rain. The usual whirlwind of thoughts—memories, regrets, plans—none of it was there. 

I feel my body sinking into the futon beneath me, heavy and reluctant, but not in pain. My limbs ache like I've been asleep for centuries, like I'm only half in the world, but somehow that feels okay. 

I feel rested. Not just in body, but in soul. My chest doesn't feel tight. My hands don't tremble. I smell something—jasmine? Maybe tea. It lingers in the air, sweet and grounding. 

I hear distant birdsong, muffled footsteps, the world moving without urgency beyond the thin wall. I feel like I could get up, even if I haven't yet. 

I feel like I could face the day. For once, I don't dread it. I feel a smile tug at my lips before I even realize it's there. It's small, but it's genuine. 

I feel it in my cheeks, in the way my breath catches slightly with surprise. I didn't think I could smile like this again. I feel something new blooming in me—hope. 

I shifted slightly, the futon rustling beneath me, and that's when I saw him. Naruto was curled up beside me, sound asleep. His breath was slow, steady, his face soft in a way I haven't gotten to see in years. 

He looked younger like this, peaceful. I feel something stir in my chest, something that I couldn't name, but didn't reject. I didn't even realize how close he was until now, his arm curled around mine. Like a child holding it's stuffy. 

He felt safe. I felt safe. I felt grounded. I let out a quiet breath, careful not to wake him. I feel lucky. I feel at home. 

The door slid open quietly, Shikamaru stepped inside, eyes already scanning the room. He froze for a beat when he saw us—me awake, Naruto still sleeping beside me. His brows lifted just slightly, more amused than surprised. 

I feel a flicker of embarrassment, but he doesn't say a word. Just gives a slow, knowing nod. Then, with a glance toward Naruto and a small smirk tugging at his lips, he jerks his chin toward the hallway. 

I know what he means. Come on. I shift carefully, trying not to wake Naruto, and quietly rise to follow him. I followed Shikamaru down the quiet halls of his home, my footsteps soft against the wooden floor. 

I still feel a little out of place, like I've stepped into a memory that isn't mine. But it's peaceful here, warm and lived in. I glance at the scrolls lining one shelf, the small potted plants tucked in corners, and I feel... welcome. 

Shikamaru didn't say anything, just walked ahead with his usual slouch, one hand in his pocket. We stopped at a sliding door, and he slid it open with ease. 

I blinked. Inside were Ino, Choji... and Asuma. I froze for a second, mild surprise stealing my words. I hadn't expected all of them here, not like this. 

"Oh," I said softly, offering a small polite smile. "It's good to see you all." 

Ino stood up first, her smile shy. "Ishi. You're awake." Choji grinned, raising a hand in greeting. "About time." 

Asuma gave me a nod, his expression calm but kind. "Glad you're still with us." 

Something felt... different. Not just the setting or the silence between words, but them. The way Ino's smile didn't have that brittle edge. The way Choji's laughter came without hesitation. Even Asuma—his gaze held weight, sure, but not suspicion. It hit me all at once. 

"You guys are a lot nicer now," I commented, watching their faces. "Less hostile. Why the change?" 

Shikamaru glanced at Asuma, then back at me. "You were greenlit into coming back into the village." I raised a brow. 

"Was Kakashi spying on us the whole time?" My voice dropped. "The Sharingan has the ability to tell truth from lies. He must know I've said none." 

Shikamaru gave a single nod. "Yes." 

I sat with that. Of course he knew. I rolled my eyes, not surprised by this turn of events. I leaned against the wall as I watched Shikamaru sit down beside Asuma. 

While everyone was acting polite, it was still very awkward. And it was for that reason, and my new state of mental clarity, that I decided to do something for the very first time. 

"I just wanted to say," I started, as he bowed in apologies to them. "I am sorry for the mess I caused. You are still young, you don't need to deal with the likes of me." 

I turned to Asume, "and I know you are very busy." 

There was a pause after my words, like no one wad expecting what I just did. Then Ino moved first. 

She crossed the space between us and wrapped her arms around me. It was soft, unexpected, and I didn't pull away. "You're not a burden," she murmured. 

Choji just gave me that warm grin of his, full of forgiveness I didn't feel like I'd earned. It was obvious many people listened in last night. 

Asuma didn't speak right away. He met my gaze evenly, then gave a slow nod. "You were honest. That's more than a lot of people can say." 

Relief broke through me like sunlight. But then he added, with a slight smirk, "You owe a lot more than one apology, though." 

I laughed and I nodded, too. "I know." 

Because I did. I knew I didn't deserve this grace yet. But I would earn it. Slowly, step by step, I would make it right. 

The younger generation was easy to give forgiveness, the older ones were the problem. They held onto grudges for lifetimes, even passing onto their children. 

They did not care whether you had a good reason, you still did it. I wasn't expecting forgiveness but I was willing to work for it.

A/n I am so sorry people! I was writing other things at the moment and completely had no will to write this. I am an author in the making and want to enter the field and to do that I need an original idea and to write it, which I was doing. A very annoyingly fun thing to do. But I will continue this of course! I gave you a nice moment as a sorry for what I did and what I will do. Enjoy~