Chapter 43

“Do not pity the dead. Pity the living, and above all, those who live without love"

HP7

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The lights swirled so fast that knocked Evelyn out.When she gained her consciousness back, it was all dark and incredibly freezing.She didn't miss that cold sensation, she wished she wouldn't experience that again. But she wasn't dead. And she wasn't falling anymore.She blinked until she could focus on what was around her. It was night and it was lightly snowing.Evelyn shivered into her light travel robes, feeling the icy air tickling her sore body.She felt the urge to stand up from the cobblestones and find some warmth.Clumsily she struggled under her light dress and stood up. Her wand was into her pocket so she took it to get some lights.She was in some deserted street, but she saw buildings in the nearby.When she checked them, she realized she was in Diagon Alley."What the hell I am doing in Diagon Alley?" She asked to herself, then she noticed that it was a different version of the place she used to know. She spotted a wizard walking fast in the main road, so she staggered to stop him.The wizard gave her a bad look."I'm sorry, sir" she said trying to sound friendly when she was scared "Can you tell me what day is today? I got an accident and I'm quite confused"."It's the last day of the year" he said turning confused "Do you want to know also the year?"."Yes, please" she said quickly."1926. In few hours we'll be in 1927" he said as if he was dealing with someone insane.She thanked him with a happy new year, then she moved with uncertainty through the streets, trying to accept the fact that she was back in time, when she wasn't even born, in a dark period because of Grindelwald, although he had been captured in the US just a couple of weeks earlier.

Deep inside she understood why she was there. It was Tom's birth day. And she had to save his mother. All alone.But she didn't understand why Diagon Alley when she needed to find the orphanage in the muggle London.She hurried to find the Leaky Cauldron, when she remembered that Tom's mother sold Salazar's locket to her uncle. So without a second thought, Evelyn marched on the opposite direction, towards Knockturn Alley.She took her wand and summoned some goblins coins, hoping to persuade her uncle enough to get the locket and run away with it.

The shop looked smaller and poorer than she was used to know it. She opened the door ignoring the close sign."Hey, madam! It's closed! Can't you read?" A younger Caractacus snapped at her.Evelyn stared at him in shock for a while. He looked much more younger than she imagined. She realized how the loss of his brother five years later would change him and make him look much more older."Good evening" she said coldly, focusing on her mission to control her emotions "I know you recently got a locket"."I don't know what you're talking about" he said clearly lying."A locket with an S engraved on it. I'm ready to pay a lot for it" she hissed placing her fake gold on the counter.Caractacus looked troubled "I'm not sure that's enough".Evelyn turned more insisting "I know that you paid ten galleons for it. I shouldn't offer you money for something that's mine, but I want a fair trade. The inspectors are looking for the supporters of Grindelwald. You know that. You're in their black list. What happens if I tell them that you stole my precious locket? Maybe you even lose this shop".Caractacus grumbled under his breath, then said loudly "How dare you walk into my shop to menace me? Who are you?"."Tell me, sir. That locket is worthy for this shop?" She said softly."You must be from the Daily Prophet. That's it!" He snapped "All nosy parkers. Well, take it. I hope someone will steal it from you again and don't dare to bring it back here".He took a little bag from a drawer and gave her the golden locket.She examinated it to be sure he wasn't tricking her. She was glad that he wasn't imitating her by checking her gold.She concluded that it was the real locket and hanged it around her neck "Well, thank you, Mr Burke. You won't see me ever again, I can promise that. Happy New Year".He collected the gold and grumbled to himself, turning his back to her.Evelyn hesitated a bit, mentally bidding him goodbye again, then turned on her heels to continue her mission."Do I know you?" Caractacus asked before she walked passed the door.Evelyn turned to give him a sad look "It can't be. Maybe I look like some of your acquaintances".He looked confused, but said with a more friendly tone "I'm sorry, miss. I just have the weird feeling... Never mind. Good night".She nodded and closed the door behind her, the cold air helping her to keep her tears. She also felt the urge to find a cloak to cover herself and her only solution was to steal one.

Hurriedly she left Diagon Alley and stepped into the muggle London. She barely remembered how to find the orphanage so she started roaming, wondering how she was going to get out a pregnant witch from there. She didn't know if Tom was already born or not.Evelyn noticed some iron gates, that looked familiar.She narrowed her eyes to the sign. Whool's orphanage. Beyond the gates she saw a fragile figure walking in the courtyard towards the steps of the big building.Evelyn inhaled deeply.A single person carrying an unborn one who needed help and nobody in the wizarding world cared to help her. And also in the following years nobody cared to save the little wizard from a world he didn't belong to.Her heart started to beat faster and she ran to follow the figure, screaming right before the woman raised her hand to knock on the door."Miss! Can I help you?".Merope Gaunt looked around scared, until her squinting eyes rested on the approaching girl.Merope retreated, embracing herself."Who are you?" She asked shyly and scared."Someone who wants to help you" Evelyn said gently "You won't find any help here. Let me take you in a safe place"."No. I don't need you. This is the place where I must go" Merope replied stubbornly."I'm sorry but I must insist" Evelyn said.Merope tried to complain but winced for a sudden contraction that made her panic."We don't have time. Come with me" Evelyn said trying to keep calm, but she was about to panic as well.She offered her a hand and moaned for the strenght of Merope's grip.They walked away from the orphanage, then Evelyn led her towards Diagon Alley, but Merope struggled."No. I can't go there. Please".Evelyn sighed raising her wand "Fine. Then let's see if I can use Apparition".She was breaking many rules, but also putting Merope's child into danger.Evely focused hard on her task and grabbed Merope's thin wrist ignoring her complains. Everything turned dark and for a moment she felt choking.When she was able to inhale freely, she opened her eyes, seeing the St Mungo's in front of her.Merope cried next to her and struggled to keep her balance.Evelyn supported her, noticing that she had broken the waters.Panicking, Evelyn raised her wand to send an alarm, seeing in a slow motion as healers rushed to them and carried Merope into the hospital.Evelyn was so shocked because it was her fault if she had killed baby Tom or damaged him.She knew how delicate was a pregnancy, she couldn't forgive herself if she wasted her only chance to change Tom's past by destroying him when he was the most harmless.

A healer accompanied her inside.Evelyn woke up from her shock only when she was told that the mother and the baby were fine.She was allowed to see them.The baby wasn't crying, but his movements showed that he was alive. Merope looked very exhausted for the labour."Do want to name him?" A witch healer asked her holding the baby for her.Evelyn held her breath, fearing that all her interference in the story would cause the most unexpected changes.Merope nodded and said weakly "Tom. Like his father. Marvolo. As my father. And Riddle. That's his last name".Evelyn felt tears itching her eyes. It was a gift to be present to that event, to the birth of the wizard she loved and who couldn't love her back.Soon after saying her last words, Merope fainted.Evelyn panicked again. It was the essence of her mission that Merope survived, but the healers assured her that Merope just needed some rest and that she would wake up again.

Evelyn couldn't imagine that her mission could be that stressing. She felt she could get a stroke.She accepted to sit on a chair, while the young healer who earlier had accompanied her inside showed her the baby.Seeing baby Tom sleeping as an angel was the most touching sight she could ever see. She wanted to cry again. Also because she couldn't understand how someone could refuse to survive for him. Still, both Merope and his father didn't want him nor didn't want to live for him. And their choices created a monster."Do you want to hold him?" The healer asked her, distracting her from her bad thoughts."No. Better not" Evelyn jumped up and stepped back. It was too awkward holding that baby, when she came to know so well the adult version of him. "He doesn't bite. Look, he's so quiet" the healer insisted sweetly."I can't. Really"."Why not?"."I don't want to hurt him" she whimpered."Hurt? Surely you can't"."Seriously. You don't know..." Evelyn sighed with frustration."Know what? Why are so scared of a baby?" He passed the baby to another healer and focused of Evelyn."I'm not scared of him. But of what I can pass to him. I'm sick" she lied softly."Why did you say it before? This is the right place for you" the healer said with enthusiasm."I'm dying" she blurted out to kill his entusiasm "I have the dragon fever. I traveled a lot. And I don't regret it. But this girl wanted to die when she can choose to live. And I can't accept it".The young healer turned pale "I'm so sorry. I wish there's a cure. There are treatments for delaying.."."I've already been through that" she cut off "Don't think of me, think of her. She can be saved".She nodded towards the sleeping Merope.The healer swallowed hard "I'll help her as much as I can".Evelyn observed the young wizard. He wanted to help her, but Evelyn needed someone to help Merope instead.So she decided to try with that wizard "She'll need a place to stay. A job. But I don't know how to help her with that".He pondered his options, then said hesitantly "I have my aunt and uncle.. They might offer her a job at their mansion".Mansion. It sounded cool, Evelyn thought.Anything but not a muggle orphanage. Tom needed to grow up amongst wizards."What's their last name?"."Prewett".A good family, she noted "Alright. If you can help them, it will be like you helped me too".She grabbed his arm giving him a warm but sad smile."I'll do what I can. I promise" he said heartfelt, then some bangs echoed outside. He smiled "Happy New Year".Evelyn laughed weakly, moving towards the windows to watch the fireworks exploding in the sky in a spectacular show to welcome the new year."We are celebrating in the hall. Would you like to come?" The healer offered."No. I want to stay with her" she nodded towards Merope "But you go, please. You deserve some fun".The young wizard hesitated, then agreed "I'll bring you one glass of wine"."I don't drink" Evelyn replied with an amused smile.

Finally Evelyn was alone with Merope and the baby, sleeping in a cradle next to her bed. His little body reacted at the explosions of the fireworks outside, but he didn't cry.Evelyn observed him, feeling the urge to comfort him, but she imposed to herself not to touch him, for not creating a paradox that could wipe everything away.So she just hummed a lullaby to calm him.Evelyn realized how wonderful it was to be a mother. Giving life was far more satisfying than killing.She imagined herself holding her own baby, with Tom by her side, smiling at her and making sweet promises.She placed a hand on her womb, drowning into those lovely fantasies. She wondered how to name her own baby, to decide that she liked the sound of Richard Riddle. She wondered if Tom would ever agree to such a simple name and imagined their fights over it. Evelyn smiled with her eyes closed. It was so sweet to dream, but she had been so close to realize that dream.

Some noises distracted Evelyn.She opened her eyes to see Merope waking up."Hey, do you feel better?" Evelyn asked sweetly kneeling next to her.Merope ignored the question and glanced at the cradle "How is he?"."He's alright" Evelyn pulled the cradle closer so Merope could pick the baby into her arms.Merope stared at baby Tom with one eye while the other looked in a different direction. Evelyn could see the love but also the sorrow on her not-so-beautiful face."I hope he will be handsome as his father" tears filled Merope's eyes."I'm sure he will be" Evelyn assured quietly. Merope couldn't know sincere Evelyn was. All she could think of was being broken hearted by the man she loved, the father of the baby who preferred to run away than to stay for his unborn son.She couldn't know what Evelyn shared the same heart break and felt the same deep loneliness."I have nothing to offer him" Merope whimpered without stopping focusing on her son "He will be safer without me. They won't know that he exists so he'll be safe. And the idea that he'll be ashamed of me is unbearable. I'd rather die now and forever".Evelyn closed her eyes. She had to persuade Merope of the opposite, but she didn't feel any positiveness inside her, so how could she persuade someone of what she wanted?She remembered the good times she had with Tom, no matter if their story was just a lie. There were many memories of when she felt so happy to be by his side. She owed him that.Evelyn opened her eyes again with a sweet smile "Don't you think that he will love you unconditionally instead? If you'll love him as he deserves, he can't ever be ashamed of you and he'll protect you from any harm. Just be strong and raise him"."I'm not so strong" Merope cried.Evelyn forced her to look her into her eyes as she said strongly "You can be. For him"."He will be better with everyone else"."But nobody else gave love him as much as you do. Nothing can replace the love of a mother" Evelyn insisted a bit sharply.Merope lowered her head to look at the baby, thoughtfully. Then suddenly she said begging to Evelyn "Take him".Evelyn widened her eyes."You can take care of him. You look like a good and nice woman so I want to trust you. He just needs some food and some attention. Look how he's quiet? He knows he has to behave well. He won't give you troubles"."I can't take him. He needs his real mother" Evelyn said failing to hide her fear."Why not?"."Because.." Evelyn sighed, deciding to use the sam story used with the healer "I'm about to die. I have an incurable disease. That's why I want you to choose life, because you have a choice where I don't. Life is not easy, but you can be strong. For your son. He'll need your love, or he won't survive long"."I can't. I wish I can replace you and die. I'm so tired, so desperate. I'm so scared"."I was afraid too" Evelyn said, blinking to clear her eyes blurred by tears "When I realized my time was almost over, I almost turned insane. But then I understood that it was right. I lived fully and saw so many things and now I'm ready to leave his life. But when I saw you so willingly to die when you were still full of life, I had to intervene. I had to help you and save your son. If you promise me you'll live, I can die in peace".Merope pondered her words, clearly impressed by the strength Evelyn had put in them. She turned thoughtful, leaving Evelyn in an excruciating wait for a response."How long do you have left?" Merope finally said with pity."Very little" Evelyn whispered firmly.Merope sighed heavily, looking between her and her son "I don't want to lose you. You're the only one who has been kind to me. There must be a cure"."There is. It's you and your son living together a long and happy life. So my last hours have not been vain" Evelyn clenched her jaw to suppress her strong emotions and placed a hand on Merope's shoulder.Merope placed her hand on it, her eyes full with tears "Thank you".That was all Evelyn needed to hear. She lingered there, feeling hope growing in a world that looked hopeless.Everything that mattered was into that small room of the hospital. Merope didn't know that the Slytherin's locket was there too. So close that she could grab it.But she didn't care of the locket anymore. Since she was holding something much more valuable. Her son.

Evelyn felt her vital energies abandoning her. She hoped that her energy would somehow be absorbed by Merope to give her the strength to survive in a cruel and dark world.She quietly walked away, feeling like a ghost.It had been a long, noisy night. Most of people celebrated the new year.While Evelyn was dying.Somehow she reached the doors and left the hospital, leaving everything behind.

Evelyn stammered in the snow, until she was far enough from anyone.She stopped.She could feel the life abandoning her, like heat that she couldn't trap into her body anymore so it became a breeze that the cold soon made disappear.Her fingers wrapped around Slytherin's locket, wondering what would happen to it now that she removed it from the story.She prayed that the little Tom she saw coming to life would live a happier existence, finally being able to feel love.

Evelyn was deeply grateful for knowing the other Tom, the one who turned into Voldemort. No matter how many times he had hurt her and disappointed her, she had never been able to leave him, to stop loving him. And she turned the discovery of her life, her unique chance to change history, into a second opportunity for him.She regretted nothing. She was glad to get the privilege to be at his side for so many years, although it meant also seeing the monster taking over Tom.Evelyn fell on her knees wrapping her arms around herself in an uncomfortable hug.Finally she was able to cry her whole heart and soul out without anyone judging her."I'm so sorry" she whispered in despair. Because saving Tom by changing his story required the greatest sacrifice. And it wasn't Evelyn's life.She collapsed on the snow, the cold burning her body, but the pain wasn't unbearable. Another energy was slowly eating her, making her feel numb.On the horizon she spotted the first lights of a new day, of a new year, of a new story for Tom Riddle.But she felt she had no part in it. She was left behind in the darkness. Her vision blurred as her heart gave its last, weak beats.Evelyn knew it was the end.When Merope Gaunt chose to live for her son, the whole story changed.

A/N

The music for this chapter is "Time" by Hans Zimmer.Probably you all know it and I think it's perfect to get the feeling of how the time and the history is changing, so please listen to it while or after reading this.

When I started to create this story I was intrigued by the idea of involving Merope somehow, and you saw what happened to make it finally come true 😅 I always felt very bad for Merope's story, for how she was like a servant to her father and her brother. And her only love happened to be a handsome muggle. And when she got her chance to decide what to do with her life, she was abandoned by him because she hoped he would remain for their son but it turned out differently.Merope was probably the most miserable and lonely witch in the story. When she was freed from her abusive father and brother, she was left alone. The Ministry never cared of her, she had no friends, nobody helped her. So she went to a muggle orphanage, not realizing what she was causing to her son with her choice. And she died. Loneliness, just like the worst heart breaks, kills. Voldemort was lonely as well, but it seemed he had no choice.Giving Merope a little help in this story seemed to me the least I could do 😊