A New Beginning (Drew's POV)

Jake lays his head on my lap as we watch Avengers Endgame, his classic dimmed indigo jacket shining in the rays of the sun that came shining through the window next to my bed. My hand laid on his forearm, tracing circles around the bend of his elbow, attempting to focus on the movie but ultimately failing.

I run my other hand through his soft fluffy locks, feeling the shower that he had taken before coming over here. His hair wasn't yet dry and moistened the palm of my hands as I continued to run my hand over his shaggy locks. Jake Sterling, the one and only love of my life, the only person that I would die for in .001 seconds, the one person that has supported me since day 1. He's the love of my life, I suppose I could call him that. There's no chance that he would ever love me the way that I love him, no way no how. He's in love with a girl who's in love with someone else, I hate to see him so hurt the way he is when he knows that someone else won her heart when he couldn't.

So, no matter how hurt he is and how lovesick I am, I will stay by his side and support whatever he does because thats what friends are for, right, friends.

I am awoken from my treacherous thoughts by a worried Jake that's close enough to my face for me to smell his breath, which always smells fresh somehow. His honey brown eyes stare into my Sepia eyes, he looks genuinely worried and I hate to worry him, I didn't even notice the single tear running down my tan cheek from the sadness coursing through my veins, from the heartache of knowing that the person you're in love with is in love with someone else, is this how Jake feels?

He sees the tear rolling down my rosy cheeks and he sighs before pulling me into his warm jacket and strong arms, spooning me for a few minutes before wiping the tears off of my cheek and whispering in my ear that it'll be okay and that I'll be fine. I am really grateful that I have such an amazing best friend. As I look into his eyes for a couple of seconds, I lost control.

I slinked my arms around his pale neck, wrapping my legs around his waist, straddling him while looking into his eyes, his questioning look fueling me more. My brain told me not to, I wanted to stop but at the same time I wanted more, I needed more. I pulled his face closer to mine before closing the space between our lips. His body tensed and he seemed freaked out for the first few seconds... until he did something I never thought he would, he actually fell in sync with me and kissed me back. His lips meshed with mine and moved with them as well, the both of us involved in this heated make out session.

His hands were caressing my sides, his fingers running up and back down the sides of my body, but as he touched a specific area I couldn't help but hum into the kiss as he did so. We both pulled away from each other to catch our breath, but as we did we happened to catch each others gaze.

I noticed what I was doing and got off of him as soon as I knew. I ran the whole situation through my mind, there was no way Jake was going to be my friend now, I mean how are you supposed to be friends with someone that you've locked lips with? I honestly wished we could've done it again, I wanted to be able to lay on him and kiss him without being in a dream, I wanted a reality I know I can't get, and it hurts more than you could ever imagine.

I'm so lost in my thoughts it hurts to think about returning to reality, I wish I could just stay in this bliss, a place where I can't feel neglect or jealousy or heartache, a place where I can be myself, where I'm not supposedly in love with Zoey, where I'm not just a jackass who doesn't deserve kind people like Jake. I just wish I could just live here in my thoughts forever.

I'm full blown crying in front of the boy I've been in love with since freshman year, tears streaming down my cheeks, breathing heavy, hand on my chest as if that would stop the panic attack I was having. Jake scoots closer to me and rests his hand in mine, it feels warm, cozy, it feels so wrong yet so right. I calm down quickly with Jake holding my hand while rubbing his thumb over the crook between my thumb and index finger. I don't think I would have calmed down if it was someone like Henry or Liam, not that I don't like them or anything, but Jake is so special to me, so precious, only he can calm me so quickly.

He lifts his other arm and wraps it around my neck like a neck pillow on an airplane and just rests there for a minute before I lay my head on his shoulder while tears drench my eyes with slight whimpers once in awhile until I finally fell asleep.

~Later~

I awoke in Jake's arms, hugged up tightly against his chest, arms slinked around the back of his neck while my legs were intertwined with his. I just wanted to stay like this forever, wrapped up in Jake's arms, no blanket even needed, his hair just above my fingers where I can caress it and feel his soft fluffy hair between my long tan fingers.

I feel him shuffle under me and I watch as his eyes slowly open, it's early in the morning on a Saturday and all I wanted to do was stay here and just be lazy all day, not like my dad would let me even if I tried, but I could still try it. He looks a little drowsy having just woken up and his hair is a mess, a cute mess, his body stiff as a board. As his vision narrows he smiles realizing the situation, giving me a short yet passionate kiss, was I dreaming?

He pulls away and just smirks at me with his classic cheeky smile that could make me blush instantly. He moved his right arm off of my mid-back to the side of my face and rubbed his thumb over my cheekbone, I just looked up at him in awe as he toyed with my violet hair. He's so amazing I can't even begin to explain it, it's almost like he can just instantaneously make all of my worries and all of my problems float away, if heaven does exist, it's this boy right here, this boy that my head is laying on is it.

As much as I want to stay here forever, there is still one question that's lingering inside of me that I need to ask him. "Hey, Jake?" I begin to ask, trying to make eye contact but failing. "Yeah, Drew?" he answers rather curiously. "What a-" I begin to ask but decide against it. "What were you gonna say?" He asks with curiosity, looking down at me as I look up at his gorgeous brown eyes. "It's not important," I lie, mostly to comfort myself but also to get him off of my back but I should've known better because I know Jake and he doesn't just give up. "Drew, it's fine, ask away." I shudder at his words, trying to reassure myself that it'll all be okay but not completely convincing myself. "What are we?" I blurt out like I was terrified to ask it, which to be honest, I was, he looks down into my eyes and just smiled before looking up again. "Well, Drew, what do you want us to be?" He asks as if it's no big deal for him, I didn't want to tell him that I've been in love with him for years or that I'm gay in general, but if I wanted to be anything to him I would have to let him know in some way.

I scoot up closer to him and look in his eyes before kissing him in a way I didn't even know I could. I pulled away and just smiled passionately at him before burying my head into his chest once more and just breathing in his scent for a minute. "Boyfriends?" he asks while caressing my head with his hand and just looking down at me. I nod my head in agreement, or at least I try to with my head buried in his shirt. 

He just chuckles and looks at me before we soon drift off to sleep again, cuddled up together in each other's arms.

~2 weeks later~

It's getting easier being Jake's boyfriend, not that it was hard to date him in the first place, it just doesn't feel so surreal anymore. We're not public yet because he wants to tell his parents and brother first, I don't mind being public, as long as Jake's happy, I don't mind being out. I would give up everything for him, it's insane. Before now I wouldn't even be able to say I was gay, I was kind of ashamed of it, being gay I mean, I know coming out and accepting your sexuality isn't as easy as it may appear and that's why I never tried, but with Jake it feels like a walk in the park, yet it still feels wrong to go public.

I walk into 3rd period and see Henry, my idiot of a friend, he may be a moron, but he's sensible. Me and Jake have debated the the topic of whether or not Henry and Liam are secretly dating or not, we came to the conclusion that they are and moved on from it. They're so compatible and they never even saw it, Henry wanted Lia and Liam (apparently) wanted Stacy's mom, but they're so in love it physically hurts me to watch them pretend to just be great friends. 

Henry nudges my shoulder and just coos before pointing out the fact that I'm staring at Jake. We told Liam and Henry about our relationship because we know we can trust them along with Zoey and Lia which I was skeptical of telling Lia and Zoey, but Jake said it was fine so I complied. I nudge Henry back playfully while chatting with him a little more before it was time for 4th period. I pretend to be just the same old besties with Jake, but it's hard to do that because at school we may look like regular straight homies, but after school we're cuddling in my bed or making out in his, it's exhausting having to play the part all of the time, but if that's what I have to do for Jake, then so be it.

~Later~

I begin to walk home with Liam because Jake got picked up early because he was sick, as much as I would love to go take care of my sick boyfriend, then his parents would know about us and I could never do that to Jake. I kick a rock with my foot a few times before just stopping mid-walk and staring at my shoes. Liam looks at me with a confused look on his face before stopping and resting his hand on my shoulder. It wasn't very reassuring, I bet if Jake were here right now he would be able to comfort me easily, but he's not here and I can't change that. 

I began to run, run faster than I ever have before, I wasn't sure where I was going to go or anything, but somehow I ended up at Jake's. I knocked on the door, exhausted from running as far as I did. Liam decided against running after me because he knew where I was going to go and wanted to give me some alone time, I appreciate him for that.

I rung the doorbell and Jake's mom answered, flashing me a smile as she told me that Jake was sick. "Oh, Drew, what a pleasant surprise! Unfortunately Jake is sick today, I'm sorry sweetie!" She says in a sing-song voice while looking at me and smiling. "I know, Mrs. Sterling, I just wanted to check in on him, make sure he's okay," I tell her, half telling the truth, yes I did want to check in on my sick boyfriend, but there was more to it, I really just wanted to make both of us feel better and cuddle until tomorrow comes. "Oh, how sweet of you! I think Jake would appreciate it if you came around to see him, I noticed you two have been hanging around each other more often over the past two weeks and he's seemed very happy ever since!" She exclaimed, it made me feel all fuzzy inside when I heard that he seemed better now that he was hanging out around me more often, me.

"Do you mind if I come in?" I ask, looking at her with the most innocent look I can fathom. "Of course sweetie!" She said before opening the door wider as if allowing me access to walk inside. I see Milo on the sofa watching cartoons and playing on his tablet. He sees me and runs over to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and smiling. "Coming here to see your boyfriend?" He urged, he always teased us about being boyfriends, so I knew Jake didn't tell him yet, even if he did he would have told me. I roll my eyes, "Sure," I say before slowly tearing away from the half-hug. "Milo, cut it out, Hun," I hear Mrs. Sterling yell out while walking over to the kitchen. I smirk at Milo as he rolls his eyes at me before sticking out his tongue and walking back over to the leather sofa that sat in front of their TV.

I walked down the hallway, staring at the photos that hung on the walls that I've see a million times already, but I still look at them. There's a picture of Jake with his dad and his foot on a soccer ball, a picture of Jake holding Milo when he was born, and many others of the sort. I scanned the usual photos on the wall before my eyes caught one I've never seen before, one of me, Jake, Henry, and Liam.

I haven't been over to Jake's house in a few months, usually we head over to my place and talk or play video games or something, but the one time I go to his house I see a photo with me and the guys in it hung up on the wall. I walk into Jake's bedroom still thinking about the photo, he seems to be awake just laying down, trying to fall asleep. "Hey, Jake," I say rather lowly, trying not to startle or irritate him. He smiles at me and sits up holding his head and groaning. "No, Jake, you need to rest, lay back down, okay?" I tell him while slowly pushing his chest down until his head was on the mattress. "Why are you here, Drew?" He questions, faking a smile and pretending to be okay, but I know he's not. "I came to take care of my lovely boyfriend of course!" I said cheerfully, saying of course in a sarcastic tone. "Ha ha, now seriously, why are you here?" He asked again and I rolled my eyes with my arms crossing my chest. 

I climbed into the bed next to him before climbing on top of him and laying my head on his chest, he seemed to relax and brought his hand up to my neck, ruffling his hands through the ends of my hair and humming quietly to himself before we both drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.

~Later~

I woke up in Jake's arms once again, warm and snuggled up against his chest, his light snoring coming across as adorable  to my ears. I hummed to the beat of his breathing and just watched him as he slept peacefully. I look at the time reading 7:35 AM and I just sigh to myself before climbing off of Jake and getting down, putting on my shoes and tying the laces before shaking Jake's leg to wake him up.

He opens his eyes groggily and looks at me and then looks at his clock next to him before huffing and sitting up slowly. "Are you sure you can go to school?" I ask worriedly, he looks at me and rolls his eyes before getting up and walking over to me. He lifted his soft pale hands up to my tan rosy cheeks before pulling me into a short yet passionate kiss. We both pull back and look at each other before giggling and leaving his house with our school supplies and backpacks.

As we walk down the sidewalk we talk about the Avengers and about our favorite horror films to watch on movie nights. "You can't deny that IT 1990 is a classic, Drew," He says rather sternly while smirking at me. "Babe, you've got it all wrong, The Ring is a Classic, not IT 1990," I said slyly while side-eyeing him and smiling cheekily. "Babe? Since when were we using pet names?" He asks sarcastically while lightly nudging me in the shoulder.

I roll my eyes as we walk up to Rosemeadow High school, but as soon as we do everyone looks at us and whispers to their friends. "Did you hear-"

"Aren't they d-"

"Are they g-" I couldn't focus on a single conversation, it was all jumbled and ringing through my ears. "Uh...Jake, what is happening?" I ask while looking at him. He shrugs his shoulders as if he doesn't know why everyone is staring and whispering. I spot Henry and Liam, they look angry and upset, what's their problem? We walk up to them and they look at us and their expression changes before Henry sighs and shows us his phone. "Jake Sterling and his best friend Drew, ex-boyfriend of Zoey, popular blonde girl, are dating!" with an attached image of both of us standing next to each other. Uh oh.