53
06:06, 19 August 2019Hello All! This update ended up being a long one but I really wanted to stick to my outline for the rest of the story. Hope you enjoy it! Please vote/comment!
><><><><
Jo
I was nervous and out of sorts, and I hated that. This was going to be the first time Negan brought me to meet another community, but I remembered what it had been like when the other leaders had come to The Sanctuary for help. We needed to make an impression. The safety of The Sanctuary entirely depended on our ability to be scarier than anything they could think of. Which took an impressive show considering what the world was like now.
I showered and actually took the time to run product through my hair, tousling it so it looked messy on purpose. I dug through my bathroom drawer until I found the small makeup bag someone had put there when Negan had my room stocked. I lined my eyes with black and dug out dark eyes shadow and mascara. It had been so long since I put on makeup but it was worth the effort. I ignored everything else in the bag and went to my dresser. I pulled on my favorite pair of leather pants and stood in the pants and my bra as I stared down at my clothes. I had no idea what to wear to look scary.
There was a knock at the door and I went to open it, still frowning. Arat was standing on the other side. She looked me up and down a disconcerted look on her face. "Hey Boss," she said a little too brightly. "You planning on wearing a shirt with that?"
Her two tone hair was pulled back from her face and she was wearing skinny jeans with a black jacket. She already had a handgun on one hip and a knife on the other. I lifted my eyebrows in surprise and then shook my head. "Negan," I muttered, jerking my chin towards the weapons.
Arat nodded. "He said I was supposed to stick to you like white on rice." She looked both excited and nervous all at the same time. I understood her nerves, the excitement, not so much. But then again she had always wanted to be a soldier. Now was her chance.
I moved back to the dresser, digging through the shirts. "Well don't worry, we're just going for a little chat outside the fence," I reassured her.
She chuckled nervously. "Yeah well, your and Negan's idea of a little chat isn't exactly what most of us think of one. And going outside the fence is never a small thing."
I stopped for a minute and looked at her appraisingly than snorted and nodded. "You're not wrong," I agreed pulling out another stack of shirts. I didn't remember having this many clothes. I was going to have to tell Negan to stop sending stuff up to me. I blew out a frustrated sigh.
"Problem?" Arat asked.
I turned back to her and motioned to the pile of clothes on my bed. "I don't know how to do this," I confessed. It was admitting to a weakness, but the truth was I trusted Arat, and if she was going to be my full time bodyguard, which was what it seemed like, she deserved to know she was working with a complete fraud.
"I don't know how to look scary," I said as I flopped down on the bed in defeat.
Arat let out a loud peel of nearly hysterical laughter. "Are you kidding?" she asked, gasping for breath.
I scowled at her and she worked to straighten her face. "You just are scary, no way around it," she said with a casual shrug.
I frowned at her in confusion. Kate hated what I did to myself, what I had become. Negan had never been bothered by me being scary, but Arat's casual acceptance was something completely different. I didn't quite know what to do with it.
"Okay," she said clapping her hands and moving towards the piles of clothes. "I didn't mean anything by that, you just you know are kinda scary sometimes." She looked me up and down critically. "So I don't think we have to overdo it...in fact..." she dragged off as she pulled out a shirt I had discarded immediately. It was a white lace, sweetheart tank top that had delicate laces running up the front and looked to be about a size too small. "This would be perfect!" she said holding it up triumphantly.
I scowled at her than the shirt. "I can't wear that," I said immediately.
"Why not?"
"It's too small, and too-" I couldn't quite find the right word to describe it. It was something Kate would wear, certainly not something I would have been caught dead in even before all of this started.
"Chaste?" Arat asked brightly. "Innocent? That's the point. All your black leather and knives need something to throw them off their game. Trust me."
I held it up against myself. It was for sure going to show way too much skin. "But it will show every drop of blood."
"I thought we were going for a little chat," Arat pointed out, raising her eyebrows. "That shouldn't involve blood."
I shrugged innocently as I pulled on the shirt. "Like you said, my and Negan's version of a little chat is different than most people's," I admitted. I turned to look at myself in the mirror scowling. I didn't look right. "I doesn't look like me," I finally confessed.
Arat held my shoulder holster out to me. "Try this," she suggested and I pulled it on. Before I could argue some more she was already holding out my thigh holster and belt as well.
I blew out a sigh and just gave in, because honestly it was just easier. By the time my weapons were strapped to my body and I shrugged on my leather jacket I felt much more like myself. My weapons all stood out against the white shirt and exposed skin and I had to admit, Arat might have been onto something. I looked powerful. Dressed like this, I was the weapon.
"Ready?" Arat asked brightly.
"I still don't think I look like me," I said moving towards the door.
"No," she agreed. "You look like a badass nightmare. Isn't that the point?"
I scowled at her, hating that once again she was right. She fell into step just behind me as we moved through the compound. I would have felt more comfortable having her walk beside me. Having her behind me reminded me a little too much of having Dwight with me, and that hadn't turned out very well. Everyone we encountered on our walk down to the courtyard where the trucks were waiting scuttled back out of our way without me having to do anything at all. I couldn't decide exactly how I felt about that.
I shoved open the door and stepped out into the sunlight. Negan and a dozen Saviors were milling around the three trucks we were taking. Simon saw Arat and I first and he narrowed his eyes at me. There was a dark bruising on the lower half of his jaw that looked suspiciously like it might account for Negan's bruised knuckles. I was going to have to ask Negan about it when we had time alone. Simon said something and Negan looked up.
Negan's jaw dropped when I stalked out into the courtyard and I knew Arat had been absolutely spot on in her choice. Even if I was a little uncomfortable his reaction gave me the confidence I needed. And he wasn't the only one. Several of The Saviors preparing to go actually stopped and stared. I wasn't used to this kind of attention and I wanted more than anything to cross my arms over my stomach to hide the three inches of exposed mid rift between the tank top and the low riding leather pants.
As I approached him he let out a low whistle. "Well now, you are looking delicious hot friend," he drawled. I knew he was partially putting on a show for the gathered men, but his eyes were like liquid chocolate as he raked them over my body.
My stomach tightened as I remembered the night before and I fought the urge to blush and look away. But we were being watched, so instead I twisted my lips into a confident smirk. "Are we ready to go or is there another hold up?" I asked imperiously letting my eyes flicker to Simon as though he might be the reason we were being held up.
Simon's bruised jaw tightened and he scowled at me, but Negan just laughed. He took a step towards me and gripped my hip possessively as he pulled me into his chest and kissed me in front of everyone. I was about to pull back indignantly but when his tongue touched mine my mind went blank as his other hand gripped the bare skin at my side.
Somehow, even surrounded by all of Negan's soldiers he managed to get me to forget about it. He pulled back first, a cocky smirk on his face. I scowled up at him and he ran his tongue along his lower lip. "You know how much I love it when you scowl at me."
I grunted in annoyance and moved to climb into the lead truck. Negan was chuckling behind me. "All right assholes. Let's load up!" he called. He paused when Simon and Arat moved to follow.
"You two take the second truck," he ordered.
Simon scowled at Negan but nodded once briskly and turned for the truck. I glanced back at Arat and frowned as Negan stepped up next to her.
"We want to know if he says anything," Negan growled low enough only the three of us could have heard. Arat's eyes hardened and she nodded eagerly in agreement as she turned to follow Simon.
Negan climbed into the drivers seat and I pulled myself up into the passenger seat.
"Sending Arat to do a little spying?" I asked once it was just the two of us. I tried to keep the disapproval from my voice but it was hard. Arat was my friend, and while she was eager for an assignment she needed more training before I was confident she could defend herself.
Negan ignored my tone and started the truck. "You're goddamn right, it's called using my resources."
"What do you think I'm doing?" I asked motioning down at myself.
Negan turned serious eyes to me. "You're driving me goddamn insane," he growled and he kissed me hard and fast before sitting back and shifting the truck into gear. "All right, lets get this shit done so we can get back here and I can peel those clothes off of you."
"Are you expecting any trouble?" I asked, leaning back so I could look in the side mirror at the two trucks following us.
"No, just need to have a little chat with our ally. Remind him of the rules."
I couldn't contain the uncharacteristic giggle that bubbled up in my throat.
"Something funny sweetheart?" he drawled stretching his arm across the bench seat so it rested comfortably close.
I shook my head as I grinned up at him. "Someone reminded me today that our version of a 'little chat' can be very different than most people's."
"Yeah?" Negan asked, turning the truck onto the main road. "How did that come up?"
I turned a cheeky grin at him. "When I pointed out that white wasn't a practical color for me to wear because of how easily it shows blood."
Negan threw back his head and laughed. Then he reached down and slid a CD into the player. The Rolling Stone's Sympathy For The Devil blared through the speakers and I shook my head, smiling at him as he started singing along.
I turned to look out my window at the trees as they slid by.
"Please allow me to introduce myself, I'm a man of wealth and taste..."
><><><><
Jo
It surprised me how close the meeting spot was. We drove for less than an hour. It was a little frightening to know another community was so close and I hadn't known about it.
It was strange. At the start of all of this the thought of us all being alone with the Biters was scary. Now, it was the people that were the real danger. All it took was one person, one group, messing with the status quo and everything we had built could come tumbling down. I had often thought of Negan as a warlord of sorts but now I was beginning to recognize the need for that. Someone needed to keep the communities in line.
I cracked my neck as I climbed out of the truck. I needed to focus. While we were here, nothing else mattered but the safety of our people. It couldn't.
The other group was waiting when we arrived. The man I could only assume was The King stood at the head of the group. He had long grey dreads, wore a brown leather duster and carried a walking stick like it was a staff.
But what grabbed my attention above anything else was the frickin tiger he had on a chain sitting beside him. There were ten armed men standing behind The King. Ten potential threats that in that moment could have easily attacked, but my eyes were locked on the tiger.
Back when I was pursuing my PhD I had studied North American predators. And while the tiger certainly wasn't native to North America, I was awestruck by how beautiful it was. It's coat was thick and lovely, it was clearly well taken care of. I couldn't imagine the amount of resources it took to feed it, let alone the rest of its care.
Negan climbed out of the truck, lifting his bat off the dash, but he didn't look concerned or surprised that there was a tiger waiting for us. As far as demonstrations of power I couldn't help feeling like The King had one up on us with his tiger. No bat and no amount of knives were ever going to be more impressive than that. Where did he even get a tiger? I glanced around at everyone else, but no one was reacting. They were all acting like it was totally normal.
I slid out of the truck behind Negan, letting my hand rest on the knife on my belt. I had two guns tucked under my arms in the shoulder holsters but they were for show more than anything else. Arat slipped up behind me. If she was frightened by the tiger or the armed men standing at the king's back she didn't let any of it show on her face. Instead she screwed her face up into a sneer and crossed her arms over her chest.
"What is this your highness? No royal welcome? No special feast for your friends?" Negan asked, and the smile he flashed had too much teeth. He twirled the bat in his hand and leveled it at the tiger. "This looks strangely like a threat." Negan observed running his eyes over their gathered group.
The King's jaw tightened and he lifted it a degree, refusing to be cowed by Negan although I could see the fear flickering in his eyes despite the tiger at his side. "We had an accord Negan," he said tightly and he reached down and rested his hand in the plush fur between the tigers ears. The tiger lifted it's head bumping it into The King's hand affectionately.
I wanted to pet the tiger. Negan glanced back at me and shot me a reproachful look. I didn't think I had reacted, but Negan new me all too well. I closed my hands into fists and forced myself to stay exactly where I was. I couldn't react no matter how cool the tiger was.
Negan tsked, shaking his head as though he were disappointed. "You know what, we did," Negan responded firmly and the tiger lifted it's head at him and snarled. Negan paused, though he didn't look the least bit concerned. He ran his eyes over The Kings gathered group. "I'm sorry, but have I missed something? Are we not here to have a polite goddamn chat between friends or are you threatening me with this shit?"
The King blanched at Negan's tone and the tiger let out a low rumble again and my hand dropped to the large knife in my spine sheath. It wasn't going to do a whole lot against a frickin tiger that was attacking, but if I could hit it in the eye I might be able to stop it.
Negan scowled and leveled his bat straight at The Kings chest. "If your pussy growls at me one more time I'm going to shoot it," he snarled.
The King glanced to his right and one of his men stepped forward, taking the tigers chain from his hand. The man pulled the tiger back. The tiger hesitated, looking up at The King as though he were it's whole world before it relented to follow the man back towards their vehicles. I wondered if The King rolled down the window for it while they drove or if he kept it locked up. It made me strangely sad to think of such a beautiful creature being kept in a cage.
I had to swallow back the surge of memories from my time in Woodbury.
With the tiger gone I could focus on the men surrounding The King. I decided the man standing to The Kings right was the biggest threat. He was closest to me but he also looked the most like a fighter. He was huge, not just tall but also broad. His face had smile lines but he was scowling at Negan and the way he had positioned his body made me think he was absolutely loyal to The King. He had a massive homemade ax resting over one shoulder and his body was tense, ready to fight.
"Now, down to business," Negan said. "We agreed, that The Saviors would provide protection to you and yours in exchange for food. The understanding was that you and your little Kingdom here would not make weapons, but you know what I see?" Negan asked taking a step towards the large guard standing beside The King. "I see a goddamn battle ax! I see armor!" Negan bellowed. Then he calmed himself, pressing his lips together making a show of the effort of reining it in. As though he couldn't control his temper. "So tell me your highness, are we backsliding? Or are these just rumors? Because they would be goddamn disturbing rumors."
The King stood ramrod straight in the face of Negan's anger. I really had to give him a lot of credit. Negan's rage was something to behold, but this was nothing like it had been with Dwight. Instead of the fear that went along with being in that room I felt nothing but a sort of possessive pride that Negan was mine. Negan and I were a team. It was a strange feeling to know it wasn't actually him that brought on the fear. It was freeing and a please smile twisted across my face as I turned towards our enemies with a renewed confidence.
"Now," Negan continued. "I have been more than goddamn reasonable. I have agreed to allow you to meet us for pickups instead of having us come to your community every time so your people won't question your ability to rule them when we both goddamn know you wouldn't be strong enough to stand on your own against the other communities without us to back you. Doesn't that sound goddamn reasonable?" Negan asked, swinging around dramatically to the people gathered around us. The Saviors all nodded in agreement and Negan turned back to The King. "Now, in order to maintain the status quo, this shit with making weapons has got to stop, am I understood?" he growled.
The King puffed himself up indignantly. "You would deny my people the right to make themselves feel safe in their own homes?" he challenged. "We must have a way to protect ourselves from the dead. You do not get to deny us-"
Negan swung around so fast I barely tracked it, the bat lifting threateningly. The King didn't flinch but the large guard jumped forward to come to the aid of his king.
I didn't actually make the conscious decision, I was just moving.
He was almost twice my size and height but it didn't matter. I hit his chest and took us both to the ground. I landed on top of him in a crouch one blade held across his neck and the other poised to bury itself in his gut up under his armor.
The whole group froze. I had moved fast enough it scared every single one of the members from The Kingdom like a herd of frightened gazelle. I looked up at them out of the tops of my eyes and in that moment not a single one was a threat. Not anymore. Not a single one of them was strong enough to touch us.
"I did not realize you had a new second," The King said a little breathlessly as he stared down at me.
Negan rocked back on his heels as he regarded me. His fox-in-the-hen-house smile stretching his face. "She sure is something isn't she?" Negan asked as he raked his eyes over me. "But honestly you should show her more respect. You're royalty aren't you? You should recognize a Queen when you see one."
Simon stiffened behind Negan and his hand dropped to rest on his gun. Every single one of the people standing around us was a potential enemy even our own people if they didn't believe in our threat. I saw that now. Saw how imperative it was that they continued to fall in line and fear us. Without that fear, we were vulnerable.
My muscles coiled tighter and when I looked down at the man below me I didn't see him as a person. He was just another threat to Negan and I.
"We have an accord," The King stuttered quickly. "There is no need for this violence."
Negan flashed a dangerous grin. "Good, then we will be expecting the pick up at the usual time next month." He turned back to me. "Let him go Sweetheart."
It was the first time Negan had used the petname in front of so many people and it lacked the usual softness that accompanied it. He usually just called me his Hot Friend when others were around but he was trying to make a point. Standing in front of these strangers however I understood his desire to claim me as his, to make it clear I was untouchable. He was doing everything in his power to keep me safe. I had the same urge to do the same for him.
I needed them to know that if they moved against Negan it would be a move against me as well. I had their fear and attention now, I wasn't going to waste it. I let the mask fall so every dark place I had was shining out of my eyes.
The man beneath me panicked. His eyes widened and he went very, very still as his breath started coming hard and fast.
"I'm going to get up," I told him very calmly. "And you are going to wait to move until I'm standing over there," I said with a jerk of my chin. I leaned closer to him as though I were confiding in him, but I kept my voice loud enough for everyone to hear. "Otherwise I'm going to gut you right here whether I want to or not," I warned him.
I needed the show, but it was also a little bit the truth. I wasn't in control. I was riding the edge and with Negan at my back it was the most freeing feeling in the world. I was almost giddy as I climbed to my feet with my knives naked in my hands.
The King's eyes were narrow as he stared at me fearfully. He was holding his hands out in surrender, and while every one of our people had a gun in hand his eyes were locked on me. I smiled at him and it had too much teeth.
"We haven't been properly introduced," I said stalking towards him.
Negan did nothing to stop me, which told me I had been reading this situation exactly right. We needed this community to fall back in line so ours and the other communities under our protection remained safe. We couldn't afford to take a misstep here. I twirled the knife in my right hand through my fingers in an overly showy way before sliding it back in it's sheath along my spine.
I extended my hand. "I'm Jo."
The King swallowed, his eyes flickering behind me to Negan and then back to meet my gaze. His shoulders had hunched slightly and his eyes were erratic, he didn't know which one of us to be more afraid of.
"Nice to meet you Jo," he lied. "I am King Ezekiel."
We packed it up after that. Our men stood by while the kings people loaded our food into the back of the other trucks while Negan and I went to our truck.
"So, I need to swing by the Satellite Outpost and debrief Tommy boy, you can come with me, or you and Arat can catch a ride back to The Sanctuary."
My blood was stilling pumping adrenaline through my veins and I felt amazing. I wasn't ready to go back behind the fence.
"I'll come," I agreed.
The smile he flashed me was worth it. He leaned across the seat and pressed his lips against mine. "Can I just tell you how goddamn sexy you are?" he growled against my lips.
I laughed and shoved him back playfully.
"I mean it," he said and he started the truck. His eyes were still dancing as he put it in gear. "I don't know how I survived this long without you by my side."
I turned in my seat and leaned forward to restart the CD, blasting Sympathy For the Devil loud enough for everyone outside to hear. Then I pushed myself up on my knees and pressed my lips against the corner of his mouth as he drove.
"I don't know how you did either." I said in a low husky voice.
He turned back onto the main road and threw his head back and laughed out loud, his smile genuine. He wrapped his free arm around my shoulders and pulled me across the seat into him. He tucked me into his chest and I let out a contented breath.
He leaned his head down and pressed his lips against the top of my head. "I love you sweetheart," he growled. "You know that?"
I froze beneath his arm, staring up into his face in wonder. I wished somehow in the back of my mind that he wasn't driving so I could see his expression more clearly. So I could be sure of his sincerity and know if he was telling me the truth.
"You do?" I asked, startled. My voice came out smaller than I had intended.
Negan barked out a laugh and glanced sideways at me. "Of course I do," he replied totally confident and totally unapologetically. There were times when I couldn't begin to understand how he could be so certain of himself and his feelings.
"But-" I started to say.
He shook his head. "Don't you dare tell me you're broken," he warned severely. "Or somehow not worth it or whatever else bullshit those voices in the back of your brain are telling you."
"But-" I started again.
"Jo, goddamnit," he swung the truck to the side of the road, slamming on the brakes. He turned to face me. He moved fast, his hands coming up to grip my cheeks between his warm palms. I wanted to look away from the intensity of his dark eyes, but I was like bird caught in the eyes of a snake.
"You are beautiful and strong and so good," he said closing his eyes as he said good almost reverently. "You think you're broken, but all I see is strength. We are the same sweetheart. Made in the fire of this new world and I love you for it with every piece of me."
My heart started thundering in my chest as I stared up into his face. His eyes were absolutely sincere, there was no evidence that he was lying, but there was an ugly part of me that he had called out that I couldn't quite shut up. A snarling voice in the back of my head that continued to tell me that I wasn't worthy, that I was broken, that he should be with someone stronger, better.
As though he could read my mind Negan leaned into me and kissed me passionately. I was breathless when he pulled away and rested his forehead against mine as we both gasped for breath. "This world is a shit show and the people are shitty and a pain in the ass, but I don't want to do this without you by my side Sweetheart."
I closed my eyes at his words. They were not the words of poems or fairytales, but they were one hundred percent Negan and because of that I knew I could trust them. I closed my eyes and leaned closed into him, so my lips ghosted across his as I spoke.
"I love you too."
><><><><
Jo
There were two people manning the gate of the Satellite Station. When they saw it was Negan and I they quickly opened in it. One of them was already reaching for their radio. We had the truck parked and were just climbing out when the door opened. Tom and Kate came out to greet us.
Kate ran ahead of Tommy straight to me. I hesitated for a moment. The last time we had seen one another Kate had slapped me and called me selfish for how I handled Merle's death. I didn't expect her to slap me again, certainly not in front of Negan if she knew what was good for her, but I wasn't exactly certain of her motives.
In true Kate bipolar fashion she threw her arms around me acting like nothing had happened at our last meeting. Like she hadn't basically accused me of killing Merle. I hugged her stiffly and she stepped back a wide grin stretching her beautiful face.
"Welcome!" she gushed. "I'm so glad you're here! It's been forever. Where has he been hiding you?"
Negan was giving Kate a frosty look and I immediately stepped between them. I didn't want Katie to suffer the wrath of Negan just because she had said a few things that hurt my feelings. She had been hurting at the time too, I couldn't blame her for her grief. Merle had meant the world to both of us.
"Negan, Jo," Tom greeted, dropping to his knee. He nodded respectfully to both of us.
All the other guards around us followed suit. Kate glanced fromTom to Negan and finally dropped to her knee.
Once she had knelt Negan flashed her a grin. Then he clapped Tomon the back. "Tommy boy, just came from a meeting with your neighbor Ezekiel. There a place you and I can chat?" he asked.
Tom climbed to his feet with a nod. "Of course, follow me." Negan was more relaxed here than I had seen him in a long time. It took me a moment to realize it was because he genuinely liked Tom and seemed to trust him.
Negan turned to me. "You joining us for the recap or you catching up with little sis?"
Kate looked affronted for a second and I realized Negan had chased his words very carefully. He was making it clear Kate was not welcome in the meeting.
"I think I'll let Kate give me the tour," I told him.
Negan's eyes flickered to Tom who stepped forward immediately. "R.J. and Paula will go with them," he offered, jerking his chin at the red headed woman standing towards the back of the group and the man at Tom's right.
The guards standing between us and Paula stepped aside giving her a clear line of sight. Negan stepped up and brushed his lips across my forehead, letting his hand linger on the skin just above my belt.
"Be safe," he ordered. His eyes traveled to the other woman and he scowled. "Play nice."
I had never told Negan about the moment in the gym between Paula and I but as always he missed nothing.
I lifted my chin to meet his gaze. "Always," I promised him.
He snorted and shook his head. "Right..." he dragged off. Then he turned, swinging his bat up to rest over his shoulder. "Lead the way Tommy Boy."
I turned around to face Paula and a predatory smile stretched my face. "Hiya Paula," I greeted.
She didn't look frightened exactly but her eyes kept flashing from Negan to me as she tried desperately to work out what was going on.
"Do you remember me?" I asked with feigned innocence. "We met in the gym at The Sanctuary," I let the sweet smile still on my face and the darkness peaked out my eyes. "You were mean to my friend."
Paula's eyes widened and she swallowed audibly. It made me smile.
><><><><
So...I hope you all enjoyed the update!
You guys are seriously the most supportive readers a girl could ask for! Your votes and comments keep me writing and I'm so excited about where this story is going!
There are no comments yet. Log in to be the first to leave a review!

![Dust Bones [Harry Styles]](https://fanficsread.net/media/fs-stories-1/1198/conversions/a640cdb809d084e5d20475eedbf3c663.jpg)



