Nice try - Alexia Putellas

Summary: Alexia thinks buying Y/N clothes is a love language

..

Y/n was on a mission.

A quiet, stealthy, slightly ridiculous mission that involved tiptoeing out of their house in a hoodie three sizes too big–Alexia's, obviously–wearing the one pair of jeans she had left, which was now very much ripped across the knee and suspiciously breezy in the back.

She couldn't let Alexia see her like this.

If Alexia so much as sensed that Y/n needed new clothes, she would materialise out of thin air with a platinum credit card and the entire spring collection of three different Spanish designers.

She had done it before. Alba had mentioned once that she liked a certain purse, and boom: three purses, delivered, and a casual "I thought this one looked better on you" from Alexia like she hadn't just dropped €2,000 for fun.

So no. Y/n was not about to become the next victim.

She waited until Alexia left for training, counted five extra minutes–just in case she forgot her water bottle and came back, because that had happened before, too–, and then bolted.

Half an hour later, she was crouched behind a rack of trousers in a little boutique downtown, trying to decide between two identical pairs of black pants. Y/n could only afford one, and god forbid she buy two- otherwise, she wouldn't be able to treat herself at the super overpriced coffee shop near her university."

She pulled out her phone to check her bank balance. She looked at the number and sighed. Maybe she could give some tutoring? She could make some extra money off of that.

Just as she was about to put her phone away, a text appeared.

Alexia: Where are you?

Y/n blinked. Hesitated.

Y/n: uniAlexia: You don't have any classes on Wednesdays.Y/n: I do

That was weak. She knew it. Alexia definitely knew it.

Alexia: You left your location on, amor.

Y/n froze, eyes wide. Her thumb hovered uselessly above her screen. God, she was so bad at lying. She needed to delete Life360 or whatever tracker Alexia had installed under the guise of "safety."

Then another text:

Alexia: I love buying things. Why didn't you wait for me? I wanted to go too.

"Shit," she muttered, glancing over her shoulder like Alexia might already be walking in, designer sunglasses and euro bills in hand.

..

Y/n stood in the fitting room, staring at the two pairs of pants and two shirts draped over her arm like they weighed a thousand kilos.

It felt indulgent. Excessive. Reckless, even.

She'd been holding out for months–mending ripped seams, rotating the same three outfits, saying it was trying to create a minimalist approach to life–but now her last decent pair of pants had betrayed her with a dramatic rip, and here she was.

Four items. Four. Her chest tightened like she had just maxed out a credit card. It didn't matter that they were basics or on sale...Just the idea of buying more than one thing made her skin crawl with guilt.

Alexia would've walked in and cleared a whole rack without blinking, but Y/n wasn't like that. She could already hear her own voice in her head:

This is too much. You don't need all this. Put one back. Put two back. Hell, put all of it back and make peace with your tragic wardrobe.

Still locked in that mental spiral, Y/n approached the register like she was walking into a courtroom, bracing for judgment. The cashier scanned the tags with a chirpy rhythm that made her stomach twist, and then, just as she reached for her card, he smiled brightly.

"Looks like you're all set. Mrs. Putellas already paid for everything."

Y/n stared at him like he'd just slapped her.

"Excuse me?" she asked, blinking slowly.

The man at the counter, mid-30s, smiley, clearly unaware of the emotional warfare he had just triggered, tilted his head.

"Mrs. Putellas has already paid." He said louder, as if Yn didn't hear him the first time. "Isn't that sweet?"

Y/n's right eye twitched.

"She what?" she asked, her voice flat, her soul leaving her body.

He grinned, still clearly thinking this was a romantic surprise moment.

"She paid remotely. It happens all the time- oh, and she left a note! Said to tell you 'nice try, amor.'"

Y/n's mouth dropped open.

"I..." she muttered, absolutely seething. "Fuck Alexia."

"Would you like me to pack it as a gift?" he offered weakly, now aware he may have stepped into a silent couple war.

Y/n took a deep, cleansing breath. Then she smiled, the type of smile that would have made Alexia very nervous had she been present.

"No," Y/n said sweetly. "But do you sell running shoes? Mrs. Putellas gonna need them."

..

Y/n didn't slam the front door, but only because she knew Alexia had expensive taste in hinges.

Storming into the living room with her shopping bags like they were the physical manifestation of betrayal, she found Alexia exactly where she expected her to be: lounged on the sofa, one leg tucked under her, hair in a clip, and eyes glued to the TV where a replay of Barça's last match played in glorious 4K.

Alexia barely glanced away from the screen as Y/n stepped in front of it, blocking the entire view.

Her response? A contented little sigh and the casual press of a warm hand to Y/n's waist.

"Hola, amor," she murmured, gently leaning over and kissing Y/n's belly over her shirt. "Can you just take one tiny step to the side so I can see Patri's goal again? It was so clean–"

"No," Y/n said, not moving an inch. "Alexia. What the hell?"

Alexia blinked up at her, all wide-eyed and falsely innocent. "What?"

Y/n lifted a shopping bag and shook it gently. "How many times have I asked you not to buy me things?"

"I didn't buy you anything," Alexia replied, with the slow, smug calm of someone who knew exactly what they were doing. "I just paid for them. It's different."

Y/n gaped. "It's not different!"

"It is in my heart." Alexia gave her a cheeky smile and tugged gently at her waist to try and coax her aside. "Also, you picked them yourself. So technically, I just... assisted."

"You hacked the store's payment system."

"I used Apple Pay."

"Same thing," Y/n muttered, flopping dramatically onto the sofa beside her, pout on her face.

Alexia leaned in, voice low and teasing. "You really think pouting is going to stop me?"

"Shut up."

"You're welcome, amor"

Y/n buried her face in a throw pillow to muffle the sound, leaving her body.

The game carried on, with Y/n begrudgingly sinking into the sofa next to Alexia.

Every now and then, Alexia's eyes would flicker over to Y/n, a smug little grin tugging at her lips, especially when she could feel the weight of Y/n's tension beside her.

But for the most part, they watched the game in comfortable silence–well, as comfortable as it could be with Y/n trying not to think about how Alexia had yet again spent her money on her.

As the final whistle blew and the game wrapped up, Y/n sighed deeply, finally leaning back into the sofa.

She didn't look at Alexia, didn't even glance at her. The silence was only broken when Alexia's grin widened.

"Amor," Alexia whispered, urging Y/n to sit on her lap, which she did.

Alexia's hand naturally found its place at Y/n's waist, then slowly moved up to her ribs, her thumb gently brushing over the soft fabric of Y/n's shirt before it lingered on her breast.

Y/n gently took Alexia's hand and placed it on her own lap, giving her a tired look. "No."

Alexia's grin faltered, her hand staying still on Y/n's lap as she tilted her head in confusion.

"No? Por que?"

Y/n sighed, shifting to face her, a soft but serious look in her eyes.

"I don't like it when you buy me things. I don't want you throwing money at me like that. I don't want you to do that, Alexia."

Alexia's eyes softened, brows knitting together as she reached out again, this time brushing a lock of hair from Y/n's face.

"Amor, I don't... I don't mean to make you feel bad. I just love you, and I want you to be comfortable. To have things you like. To have what you deserve."

Y/n looked at her, her chest tightening, feeling the warmth of Alexia's hand on her face.

"I know you do," she whispered. "But I don't want you to feel like you have to keep doing this for me. I don't need it. I just want you."

Alexia leaned forward and kissed her–just a soft, grounding peck on the lips. Nothing flashy. Just presence.

"I hear you," Alexia murmured as she pulled back slightly, eyes scanning Y/n's face. "I will ease up on it"

"Ease up?"

"Yes," Alexia nodded, ever-so-slightly proud. "I will not buy as many things."

Y/n narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Good."

There was a beat of silence.

"But what if..." Alexia started, tone far too casual, "We settle on an amount of money?"

Y/n stared at her. "What?"

Alexia's fingers danced lightly against Y/n's side, like that might distract her. "Like, I'm allowed to spend up to a certain amount on you. Weekly."

"...Are you giving yourself an allowance to spoil me?"

"Sí," Alexia replied with a completely straight face.

Y/n groaned. "Alexia. That is not how allowances work."

"It is now," Alexia said brightly. "Like a budget. Very responsible."

Y/n slumped forward and buried her face in her girlfriend's shoulder. "Alexia! How can you be so stubborn!"

"Not stubborn, just full of love," Alexia whispered, pressing a kiss to Y/n's temple.

Y/n didn't move. "What's the allowance, then?"

"€1000."

Y/n pulled back, eyes wide. "That's a weekly allowance?!"

Alexia shrugged, totally unfazed. "It used to be unlimited."

Y/n stared at her in exhausted silence.

"Would you like to negotiate?" Alexia offered sweetly.

"I'd like to remove myself from this financial arrangement."

"You can't, mi amor. I used my allowance to buy exclusive rights."

"Alexia."

Alexia grinned. "I like spoiling you. Not my fault."

"It's totally your fault," Y/n said deadpanned.

"You're like...my spoiled puppy," Alexia teased, gently cupping Y/n's jaw.

"No. No puppies, no allowances, no—stop looking at me like that." Y/n pointed an accusatory finger as Alexia batted her lashes and tilted her head.

"This is serious." Y/n insisted. "You're literally bribing me with clothes."

"I'm investing in your happiness," Alexia corrected smoothly.

Y/n squinted at her, voice low and dangerous. "I'm going to make you regret this."

Alexia just smiled. "You're so pretty when you're mad, bebé."

"You will regret this," Y/n muttered as she stood, snatching one of the shopping bags. "Every time you see me wearing these, I want you to remember I almost bought them myself."

Alexia watched her go, the proudest smirk tugging at her lips. "That's my girl."

Y/n turned back just long enough to glare. "And no sending me shoes to match!"

"I already pressed 'order,'" Alexia called sweetly.

Y/n's groan could be heard from three rooms away.

Alexia just chuckled to herself, collapsing back onto the sofa.

"Worth every euro."

..

Please let me know what u guys think <3