Part 48

Ryan had woken up in the early hours of the morning and left Beyoncé's house. She'd gone to the airport to catch a flight and then sat in a cafe since there were still no flights out.

She got herself a matcha and a slice of cheesecake. She needed some time and space to herself. The house had been busy, she'd met like 50 new people, including one who was claiming to be married to Beyoncé. And then Brooke had been yelling and arguing with her mom and then Beyoncé didn't want to tell her anything about Kelly.

Ryan just needed some space.

She texted her mom to let them know she was alive and that she was at a friend's. Then she put her phone on do not disturb and watched the people in the city go by. She felt like there were so many voices in her head; Beyoncé insulting her and acting like her thing with Kelly was nothing, Coco telling her that Beyoncé was bad for her, Brooke yelling about it being disguising, her parents constantly putting her down and telling her she only ever made bad decisions.

But Ryan was just a girl. She was just trying her best, and if anything, she was the only one who hadn't done anything wrong. So she ate her cake and resisted the urge to check her phone for missed calls. Everything had been crazy, both for herself and for the people she knew. But she could only see the view from her own eyes.

And from her perspective, Beyoncé had been perfect and made her feel so special until she didn't. She'd been loving and caring in a way she'd never experienced before, holding her close, kissing and caressing her, telling her just how much she liked her. Until she was breaking up with her and getting angry she had told Brooke about them.

Now they were back together but it was "complicated."

She knew if she spoke to Beyoncé, the older one would just tell her it was nothing and that she didn't need to be worried about Kelly. And truly, Ryan didn't think that she did with how Beyoncé was holding her that night and even during the party. It was like she didn't want Ryan to leave her side.

Still, sometimes it felt like Beyoncé wasn't as forthcoming as she should be. She'd taken so long to even admit that she felt something for Ryan. What else was she hiding from her?

Ryan picked her phone up again, finding a horror movie she hadn't seen before, and watching it while she ate and sipped her tea.

It should've been a distraction from her real life but all she could think was, who the fuck was Kelly?

Beyoncé was finally hers and now someone else wanted Beyoncé too? Ryan felt like she just couldn't catch a break. She wanted Kelly to be crazy and lying about being married, but Beyoncé hadn't exactly rejected the other woman.

Ryan wanted to call her ugly but she couldn't. Kelly was somehow both of their types and it made her feel sick. She was gorgeous, her voice warm and full, even the way she walked was sexy. And now she was what? Ryan's competition?

The small spoon cut through the cheesecake before she lifted it to her lips. Maybe Ryan was too quiet for her own good, maybe she should've confronted Beyoncé instead of leaving. But Beyoncé knew exactly what her problem was. She just didn't want to talk to Ryan about it.

The family in the movie were watching ghosts move about their home, not realising they were the actual ghosts haunting the house. It was a good movie, she finished it and got in an uber, debating on whether to tell Coco what was going on. Sometimes it felt like Beyoncé just had an issue with communication, but she knew that sounded like bullshit, so she sighed instead of telling best friend.

Then she checked her phone. She had one missed call from her parents, seven from Beyoncé and two from Brooke. She smiled to herself, tucking her lips in as the car drove her back to Beyoncé's.

She read over Beyoncé's texts, feeling a little bad for making her worry like that. But, when she pulled into to the driveway all of that guilt disappeared instantly.

Beyoncé was with that Kelly woman, hugging her and, was that a kiss? After everything Ryan had just been thinking... Why was her girlfriend kissing other people?

Ryan shot darts at her through the window telling the driver to take her to a hotel instead. She couldn't believe she'd been feeling bad about disappearing when Beyoncé was using this time to kiss other women.

She was so angry that tears fell from her eyes. She wasn't even sad, she was just pissed and this was her body's reaction.

The driver didn't even notice her crying, as she wiped them away, trying to calm herself down. Beyoncé was such a liar and Ryan had been stupid enough to trust her.

As they drove she noticed a familiar car following them. She immediately changed the destination to a further hotel. Why couldn't Beyoncé just leave her alone?

But Beyoncé followed and Ryan got out of the car, ignoring the blonde woman who was trying to talk to her and walking up to the front desk instead. When she did turn around, it was to get Beyoncé's credit card, which the older one handed over easily, her eyes scanning Ryan's for some kind of sign.

Then Ryan tried to snatch both keys but Beyoncé got one and followed her into the elevator so they could finally talk. Luckily another couple walked in and Beyoncé shut up. She didn't want to have anyone else in her business. So she waited as the elevator hummed, looking at Ryan and trying to explain herself through her eyes.

They walked into a double room, that wasn't as nice as Beyoncé was used to. But there was a bed, a desk, a tv, and a mini fridge. It was not a hotel Beyoncé would've typically booked. But she sucked it up, she had bigger fish to fry. When the door clicked behind them, she opened her mouth to speak, "honey I-"

"I'm hungry," Ryan cut her off. She didn't want to listen to her and she definitely didn't want to do that on an empty stomach. All she'd had since morning was that tea and cheesecake.

Beyoncé paused, she still didn't know how she was going to explain herself. "What do you want to eat honey?" She asked, eager to please the girl she'd spent all morning missing and worrying about.

Ryan shrugged and Beyoncé ran a hand through her hair, deciding to call room service, and order a platter of food. She didn't know what she wanted to eat either but she did know what Ryan usually liked.

Ryan lay back on the bed, grabbing the remote to flick through channels as she waited for some food to appear in front of her.

Ryan had spent the morning trying to figure out if she even wanted to hear an explanation. But when Beyoncé started to talk, she turned the tv volume up.

The older one side eyed her, letting it slide for now. Instead, she got the message and waited for the food. Ryan had a right to be annoyed.

Finally, a knock sounded at the door and Beyoncé got up to bring the food in. They ate in silence while Beyoncé thought about what she'd say to the younger girl. She really hadn't done anything wrong, she just should've explained things to Ryan last night. She knew why Ryan was upset, but Beyonce didn't want her to think that was the full story. She had to say something.

"Honey, you can't ignore me forever." Beyoncé said after they'd finished eating. Ryan looked at her, then looked away picking up her phone and flipping onto her stomach. "I love you Ry." She said tucking her lips in.

Ryan rolled her eyes but she felt her heart tug. It always felt magical to hear those three words. She'd only heard them about 6 times from the woman so it still felt like Beyoncé was saying something she'd never said before.

But Ryan wasn't going to let that sway her. She needed to prove she loved her instead of just saying it. The image of Beyoncé's lips on Kelly was still fresh in her mind. She stayed silent, still mad at Beyoncé for making her feel like this.

Beyoncé took a seat on the bed beside her, leg bouncing as she started to speak. She needed Ryan to just listen to her. But she wasn't even sure where to start. "It wasn't what it looked like baby."

This made Ryan scoff. That was exactly what she'd said to Brooke about them. The first thing she'd said when she caught them kissing.

Ryan turned up the volume on her phone, switching between Instagram and TikTok. Anything to avoid listening to Beyoncé's explanation of why she was kissing her ex wife.

"Kelly and I, we were just saying goodbye. I told her about you—"

Ryan just scrolled to the next video. It was of a woman doing her makeup who had #wlw in the caption. She was cute, Ryan thought, clicking on her page to see other videos.

But Beyoncé was getting tired of being ignored. She knew Ryan was just doing this to get under her skin, but it was working. She was irritated.

"Ryan!" She said loud enough to startle her.

Ryan swallowed, slowly looking up from her phone. Who the fuck did Beyoncé think she was talking to?

"Listen to me."

"No," Ryan rolled her eyes and turned back to her phone.

"Ry..."

She scrolled to another video.

"Baby?" She made her voice even sweeter.

Ryan continued to scroll.

"Honey?" She said again.

"What?!" Ryan snapped, irritated now. Beyoncé was acting like a little kid.

"You want mama to spank you?" Beyoncé asked her eyes turning dark.

"Beyoncé please," Ryan rolled her eyes. She couldn't fuck her way out of this.

"Ryan I swear to god if you don't start acting right we're gonna have a bigger problem."

"Whatever Beyoncé."

Beyoncé chuckled darkly under her breath. Ryan was really testing her limits. "Keep talking like that baby," Beyoncé hummed.

Ryan just rolled her eyes. She didn't know who Beyoncé thought she was. But she was going to continue to ignore her. She spread her legs out behind her turning the screen in her hands to watch YouTube videos, as she rested flat on her bed.

Beyoncé looked at those smooth brown legs, spilling out of Ryan's shorts propped up on the bed. She looked so unbothered and unfocused. Beyoncé thought it was sexy. She was always so tempting, her legs extended across the white sheets as Beyoncé watched her.

She found her hand on Ryan's ass, stroking over those shorts she had on. Ryan glanced up then back down. If Beyoncé wanted to give her a booty rub she wasn't complaining. She should be apologising and kissing her feet and feeding her grapes.

She let the older woman massage over her ass eventually breathing into the soft touch. Beyoncé's hands were almost magical on her. She felt the firm grip of those hands on her skin, pushing around, warming her internally. The way she made her feel like this was really just a massage even when her hands traveled, and Ryan's thighs started to tingle.

"Have I ever told you how sexy you are honey?" Beyoncé's voice was quieter than usual, deep and reverberating through the air.

Ryan chuckled, rolling her eyes and not saying anything, as Beyoncé's hands played with the fabric of her clothes. The answer was yes, and Ryan knew she was sexy. Beyoncé was lucky to have her when she could be with literally anyone else right now. She could probably call Gabby and be moaning her name in an hour.

"You're ignoring me again?" Beyoncé asked, her eyebrows raising. And Ryan said nothing as fingers found their way into her waistband.

Beyoncé tugged those little shorts down her legs. Then she smirked. "Let's see if I can make you say something."

Ryan shuffled a little bit letting her take them off, still not speaking to the woman responsible for how she felt.

"This white..." Beyoncé let out a satisfied hum and licked her lips eyeing the thong. "These panties look so good on you honey."

"It's so hard for me not to touch you all the time." She said stroking a finger along the lace thong between her thighs. It was like stroking her biggest temptation. She could feel Ryan's warmth underneath her finger. She felt a strong urge to pull them off and put her face between Ryan's aching thighs.

Ryan stuck her ass out giving her permission and Beyoncé bit down on the inside of her lip. Ryan's little attitudes had a way of turning her on. She always knew exactly how and where to push.

"My delicious girl," Beyoncé pulled at the fabric of her panties. "You gonna let mommy make it up to you aren't you honey? Let mama take these off for you."

Ryan rolled her eyes, still watching TikTok's as Beyoncé pulled the fabric from her legs.

Beyoncé looked at her girlfriend, lying in front of her. She leaned forward slowly, eyes set on Ryan's body, which still had the unfortunate t shirt covering her top half. But there she was, lay flat on her stomach with nothing to cover up her ass and her legs.

Beyoncé's hands reached forward and spread her cheeks and then she placed a long lick over her asshole.

Ryan jumped, she didn't expect her to lick there. Then Beyoncé did it again, swirling her tongue over her the knot. Ryan arched up and let the phone slip from her hands as she focused on the feeling of Beyoncé's tongue between her thighs.

"Oh," Ryan hesitated as Beyoncé tongue swirled around her ass. Then she spread her legs wider, letting Beyoncé's tongue go deeper.

Beyoncé dipped her tongue inside of Ryan and the younger one felt her body arch into her. She felt like heaven stroking her insides and Ryan started to let out soft pants as Beyoncé slowly thrust her tongue inside.

She could feel Beyoncé holding her cheeks apart as she licked over her hole. She was getting so wet from the touch, it felt so good the way Beyoncé touched her.

"Let's see if I can make you say something," the taller one whispered before letting her tongue dip back in.

Ryan moaned out an "mmm," that matched the same breathlessness of her panting.

"I love when you look like this," Beyoncé breathed, as small droplets of sweat formed on Ryan's skin. Her own pussy throbbed, as she licked over her girlfriend, listening to all the sounds she made as she touched her.

Beyoncé could see just how wet this was making her. She looked so damn perfect, glistening wetness between her thighs.

"You get so desperate for mommy huh?"

Ryan shook her head and Beyoncé smirked. She was only focused on the task in front of her, making Ryan feel good with her tongue right now.

"It's okay honey, I know it feels good," Beyoncé continued to slide in and out. It was slow. It was repetitive. It was just what Ryan needed.

Beyoncé was right. She wanted to be touched all over, fucked for hours. She could be mad and squirting or she could just be mad. Right now, she wanted mad and getting fucked.

She let her hand move down to her pussy, feeling how wet she was as she leaned into Beyoncé. She touched the tip of her clit and her body faltered moaning out louder before she started to rub.

"Shit," Ryan couldn't hold it in any longer. She moaned biting her lip and stroking over her pussy.

Beyoncé's apology felt so good as she continued thrusting her tongue into Ryan, and listening to the soft pants that left her lips.

Then she flipped her over and onto her back. Her tongue went back to her ass but her fingers slid into Ryan's wetness.

"Mmhh," Ryan moaned, experiencing a pleasure she'd not felt before.

"I know honey," Beyoncé planted a kiss on her asshole before she continued to thrust her fingers. "Let mommy hear you." She said and Ryan shuttered. Why was it that her words always made her even hornier?

Ryan let herself moan into the other woman. Her eyebrows arched up as she breathed into those fingers. "Uh-uhhhh," she moaned as Beyoncé sped up.

"You're taking it so well," Beyoncé praised. She loved to see her like this, struggling through moans and pants, her body begging for more. She was so beautiful, especially when she sounded like this.

"You're so wet honey" Beyoncé was honestly surprised to see it all, dripping down her fingers and past Ryan's ass. "You gonna let mama taste it?" She asked, still licking her tongue over her ass repetitively.

"Uh huh," Ryan nodded but she wasn't really listening. She'd have said yes to anything in that moment.

Beyoncé continued to lick over her ass, then she moved her tongue up higher and slid over her clit. Ryan shuddered from the mixture of sensations.

"You taste so good," Beyoncé admitted feeling Ryan quake beneath her. She was so in love with Ryan's pussy she would've done this for hours, licking up her sweat and juices hearing the shorter girl cry out in pleasure.

Ryan could feel her fingers stroking her and they felt so good as she continued to moan. Her clit throbbed, begging the older one to keep touching her and Beyoncé did just that, moaning into Ryan's pussy.

"Fffuck," Ryan moaned as Beyoncé slipped another finger into her.

"You're being such a good girl, letting mommy do what she wants to you."

Ryan hummed her body arching up off the bed. She could feel everything, each press of the tongue going inside of her, every stroke of those fingers. It was like she knew how Ryan needed to be fucked and she was giving it to her. Exactly what she wanted and how she wanted.

"You gonna let mommy fuck you here next time?" Beyoncé asked, licking over her asshole again.

"Uh huh"

"You're my little slut huh?"

"Y-y-uhhh"

"You like the way I fuck you right?"

Ryan moaned as Beyoncé's tongue flicked over her again. She didn't know why it felt so strong but her orgasm was coming fast and hard. She could barely breathe as it crashed over her.

"Shit... shit... shit..." she moaned as Beyoncé moved to lap at her juices. They were dripping out of her as Beyoncé slipped her fingers out.

Slowly, gently, Beyoncé kissed everywhere she'd touched, looking up at Ryan who was trying to recover. She looked so pretty, her eyes fluttering between open and closed.

Beyoncé bit her lip staring as she moved closer, "I could do that for the rest of my life."

"What? Play in my ass?" Ryan frowned.

Beyoncé laughed running a hand through her hair, "no- yes. Just touching you, being with you."

"Whatever Beyoncé," she rolled her eyes too tired for this conversation.

"I'm serious," Beyoncé said. "You know I love you."

7, Ryan sighed, "you love me but you keep doing stuff to hurt me and I just keep letting you because what? The sex is good?"

"I'm sorry."

"You know how many times you've said sorry to me?" Ryan sighed pulling the covers up over herself. "You tried to tell Brooke it was nothing. Again Beyoncé, even after everything."

"I panicked, you know I didn't mean that. I just got scared."

"At your big age?"

Beyoncé grit her teeth but Ryan was right. She shouldn't be letting Brooke control her life as much as she did. Especially after how she'd spoken to her earlier. She couldn't keep living her life for other people, no matter how much she loved them. She needed to set some boundaries and Ryan was helping her to see where they needed to be set.

Beyoncé sighed, "you're right honey."

"I know I'm right." Ryan rolled her eyes.

"Okay baby," Beyoncé tried to stroke her fingers over Ryan's cheek but Ryan pushed her off. "You look so beautiful when you're mad at me."

Ryan rolled her eyes and then after a few seconds she spoke again and sighed. "I just feel like you're going to hurt me again," she admitted.

"Oh honey," Beyoncé stroked Ryan's hair through her fingers, kissing her forehead. "I love you. I don't want to hurt you," Beyoncé said softly kissing her again as Ryan took another breath.

But you will, Ryan thought. She didn't say anything though, just let Beyoncé kiss her and apologise as the thought swirled through her mind.

They'd only just got back to normal, and now all of a sudden there was all of this. They still hadn't really broached the topic of Kelly. Ryan just felt like it was all too much.

"Honey, look at me," Beyoncé said and Ryan opened her eyes. She looked into those eyes, that looked more brown than usual in this light, and held Beyoncé's gaze assessing her properly. "I'm not going to hurt you. You have to trust me."

Ryan took a breath. Historically trusting Beyoncé hadn't worked out for her. It wasn't that the woman lied to her, but rather that she didn't always tell her everything. Kelly was a lie by omission and then there was the Brooke scenario.

Beyoncé reached behind Ryan and started kissing her neck.

Ryan pushed her off but Beyoncé went back. "Let me make it up to you honey?" Beyoncé said, her lips pressing at Ryan's ears.

"With sex?" Ryan rolled her eyes and Beyoncé stopped kissing her, tucking her lip between her teeth.

"Uh... no. With uh... what do you want honey?" She asked. "I can buy y— uh I'll give you all my love and attention?"

"Whatever," Ryan sighed, rolling over to find the remote so she could go to sleep.

——————-[A/N]Thoughts? Y'all be eating ass?

What y'all think about their conversation? Them having sex? Is Ryan gonna forgive her? What does Bey need to say?

I think this fic is wrapping up though guys. Let me know anything you want to happen or things you want resolved by the end of this book? Like obviously we need Bey and Ryan to figure something out, Brooke needs her own conclusion, etc. I just wanna make sure I don't miss anything. Any side characters or plot lines you're curious about? Can't say if you'll get the ending you want but I still wanna know just so I don't miss anything