Part 18

The next morning, Beyonce stroked over Ryan's face with the pad of her thumb. "I love spending this time with you honey," she said honestly, breathing in the fresh light of morning.

They'd spent the rest of the night together, kissing on each other, touching, having pillow talk. Beyoncé did the same thing she did the last time she spanked her, running Ryan a bath and sitting beside her so they could talk, while the younger one recovered from everything her body had been through.

It was a lot for them both. They ended up having to ask for new bedsheets.

Ryan smirked, "me too Bey, you make me feel so good..."

"Really?" Beyoncé's eyes lit up unintentionally. It always made her happy when Ryan told her she felt the same way she did, a small rush of tingles spreading through her body.

Ryan just nodded, and Beyoncé tucked her lips before asking, "did you decide what you wanted to do today?" They'd been talking about doing a lot of things but Bey didn't know what she would pick.

Ryan looked at her feeling kind of guilty. She knew what Beyoncé really wanted to do, she'd been talking about this boat ride like it was the most exciting thing. But Ryan honestly hated the idea of it, being anywhere that wasn't safe on the ground didn't sit right with her. Now she was trying to decide if she wanted to let Beyoncé down or just be a little scared.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing—"

"Ryan don't lie to me"

Ryan swallowed about to answer when suddenly her phone started ringing. "Um I should... I should answer this" she said looking at the name across the screen.

Beyoncé just nodded, deciding to stretch and start to get up.

"Morning mom," Ryan smiled, not thinking about the fact her mom was calling her just hours after she'd been slutted out by someone else's mother. "How are you?"

"I'm good how are you? How's your grades?"

"Um im doing okay. I just got a B in my project," she admitted, proud to have finally pushed her grade up from a C.

"B? Ryan we talked about this. B's aren't good enough."

"I know mom I'm trying," Ryan said awkwardly.

"You need to try harder, Ryan. B's just aren't good enough."

"I know mom im sorry, I can still push my grade up I just have to um i-" Ryan felt herself losing steam, feeling insecure again. It was crazy how her parents did this to her so quickly without even trying to shit on her. They just made her feel so worthless.

Beyoncé glanced at her but left her alone. She wanted to tell her to hang up on or to ignore it because whatever she was saying really didn't matter. But instead she found herself thinking about if Ryan's parents found out what they were doing. Would they hate her? She knew how this might look to other people. It wasn't like that but she knew how it looked.

Beyoncé brushed those thoughts off and went to the bathroom to get herself ready. She washed and brushed her teeth and came back out to find Ryan lying back on the bed with the tv on.

"You okay baby?" Beyoncé asked putting on underwear. She didn't know where they were going so she settled for a sports bra and panties for now - something to lounge around in until they were ready.

Ryan nodded absently but she really really wasn't. She wanted to say fuck it and spend the day doing fun things with Beyoncé but at the same time, she felt overwhelmed with guilt like anything she did would be clouded by thoughts of letting her family down and in turn letting herself down.

Beyoncé climbed into the bed beside her cradling Ryan's head on her chest. "What happened babygirl?"

Ryan sighed getting comfortable in the soft bounce of Beyoncé's breasts. "Nothing, just the usual stuff: I'm letting everyone down, I'm supposed to be better than this, you know..." she trailed off. This assignment was due on Monday and she'd barely written a page so it's not like her mom was wrong, she'd just been enjoying the peace that came with ignoring it.

Beyoncé stroked her fingers through Ryan's soft hair. Her skin looked so pretty against her own, the two different shades of brown complementing each other well.

"It's just so much pressure and I don't wanna blame them for my failures but I think that's why I'm doing so badly. I can't study when all I'm thinking about is why I have to study. Like I know how hard they had to work. I know what they've given up for me. I don't want to let them down I just... I can't breathe under all of that."

Beyoncé didn't know what to say so she opted to hold her close instead. She'd never put that kind of weight on Brooke, but she'd never had to. They'd always be okay, financially they never had to worry. Brooke could drop out and never work a day in her entire life and she'd be perfectly fine. Most people didn't have that. She hadn't had that for the first half of her life.

"I know I should do my assignment but now I feel like I can't. All I can think about is my mom and dad."

Beyoncé nodded her understanding, "when's it due?" She asked curiously.

"Monday," Ryan admitted, guilt clouding across her face.

Beyoncé took a breath before stepping into action. "Okay honey, do you want to do it today? We can get breakfast and then you can work on it here or we can go to a coffee shop, I have some things I need to do anyway."

Ryan looked down. She felt so guilty but then Beyoncé was tilting her head and planting a kiss on her lips. "We can go on a date or," she swallowed unsure if that was the correct word. "Whatever this is, we can do that anytime. I'm not gonna tell you what to do but I really don't mind either way. I just like being around you pretty girl."

Ryan felt her heart warm. They were definitely coming back here. She liked this room. It was big and peaceful. Coffee shops could be so hard to focus in, with all the noise and the strong smell of coffee.

"Alright honey, come on get showered," Beyoncé instructed planting more kisses on Ryan's face to help her get up. Ryan was so damn cute.

Ryan rolled her eyes eventually getting out of the bed. Beyoncé was doing a good job of taking her mind off of things. She just threw on a hoodie and Ryan tried to pretend like she wasn't drooling over her. She looked so sexy in her sportswear.

The two went to a simple diner for breakfast and Ryan got pancakes which she doused in syrup. They weren't talking much, both in their own worlds, stealing small glances at each other as they chewed.

Ryan could get used to breakfast dates with Bey. She wanted to be around her constantly. There was something she had that no one else did. Even talking to her on the phone was starting to feel like it wasn't enough. She wanted Beyoncé to be her girlfriend, she could picture it even: holding hands, going on dates, having good sex every night.

After eating, they climbed back into the car, casually chatting about nothing in particular. Then Ryan giggled, reaching over to wipe something off from Beyoncé's lips.

"You had..." she trailed off when she saw the look in Beyoncé's eyes. She was looking at her like she wanted to see her naked.

But Beyoncé quickly shook it off, putting the key into the ignition. Ryan frowned. She wasn't ready to ignore the way Beyoncé's eyes dipped like she'd had the same desire Ryan had.

"Bey," she said hoping to distract her from the car.

"Mhm honey? What's up" Bey looked over as Ryan placed a hand on hers.

"I'm horny," she said causing the fire to reappear in Beyoncé's eyes.

"Uh... the hotels not far," she nibbled her lip watching Ryan look around the mostly empty parking lot.

"No," Ryan shook her head. She wanted it now.

"Ry?"

"I don't care," Ryan breathed climbing over the console and into Beyoncé's lap, taking full control of what she wanted. The older woman was powerless to stop her.

Fuck it.

Bey pushed the chair back feeling Ryan's weight settle on top of her. She couldn't exactly stop when Ryan was already on top of her like this. So needy and sexy.

She didn't want to be irresponsible but Ryan was in her lap now kissing all over her. Beyoncé slid a hand into her dress, palming Ryan's breast as she started to kiss her, tasting the sweet maple syrup on her lips.

"Mmm," Ryan rolled her head back as Beyoncé pinched her nipple between her fingers.

"Tell me how bad you want it," Bey said playing with her nipples, pulling the hardening skin between her fingers. Bey was only one who could touch her like this. The only one who had ever made her feel anything like this.

"I want it." Ryan moaned. "Please mama."

Beyoncé swallowed harshly. Ryan always waited until the last minute to use that word. This time she was already calling her that. Seeing this did something to Beyoncé who pushed her top up getting her mouth on Ryan's chest and biting down harshly to elicit a hiss.

Ryan moaned at the pain. She hadn't expected it and then Beyoncé pulled her dress down and ran a tongue over her nipple, kissing gently and soothing the pain.

Ryan's lips fell open beneath her, uncomfortably craning her neck in the car.

Then Beyoncé began swapping their positions, seeming to remember they were in broad daylight in a parking lot as she pulled Ryan's dress back over her chest. Her hand gripping onto Ryan's ass as she moved causing Ryan to hiss, her ass still sore from being spanked.

Bey awkwardly moved her leg extra grateful that Ryan was in a dress today as a hand snaked into the dark haired girls underwear. Ryan moaned as Beyoncé felt her.

"Oh honey, you're so wet for me already," Beyoncé was already losing control. She wanted nothing more than to spread Ryan out and taste her right there. She wanted her making a mess all over the seats of this rented car. She wanted her desperate and begging while the car alarm sounded and everyone around watched her orgasm.

But she wasn't actually trying to get arrested so, instead, Beyoncé got her all worked up with her hands. She stroked over her clit and told her every nasty thought that crossed her mind.

"You were such a good girl for me yesterday, do you think you can do that again for me baby?" she whispered to the younger girl, lips grazing her ears as her fingers strolled languidly over her clit.

She nodded before remembering to speak. "Y... yes" Ryan hissed, flashbacks rippling through her body.

Beyoncé lanced around quickly to check nobody was watching. "Good girl. Mama wants to make you feel so so good" she encouraged, being in the car was kind of turning her on.

"You're so nasty letting me touch you like this out here," Beyoncé stopped looking around, continuing to get Ryan worked up.

Ryan took in a sharp breath feeling those fingers toying with her folds as Beyoncé's left hand dug into her skin. And then slowly one finger slipped past her folds and dipped inside of her heat.

"Fuck," Ryan hissed.

Beyoncé smiled, there it was. She slid in another finger, her eyes pinned to the other girl.

"You like that?" She asked as she pumped her fingers in harder, watching Ryan's eyes roll back into her head. She could feel all of her insides, the way she clenched around her fingers, that spongy texture as Ryan moaned into her. She was so damn turned on. "Come on baby ride my hand" she said as Ryan started to moan softly.

Ryan did as told rolling her hips over Beyoncé's fingers. "You like it baby?" Beyoncé asked. "You like having mommy's fingers inside of you like this?"

Ryan moaned clutching onto Beyoncé digging her nails in. "Uh huh," she breathed eyes closing.

"Look at me," Beyoncé said slowing her thrusts.

Ryan groaned opening her eyes. But Beyoncé didn't speed up yet. She just watched her intensely, thrusting her fingers harder, deeper.

"Look at those pretty eyes, I wanna see them when you cum all over my hand," Beyoncé licked over her lips as Ryan's brows twitched beneath her. She wanted to close her eyes so badly, just to feel Beyoncé inside of her and not think about the way she was watching her so closely.

But Beyoncé's eyes were low and fingers thrusting. Ryans hips were rolling faster now, Beyoncé's fingers keeping up with her.

"Fuck bey—" Ryan screamed and bey had look through the windows to check if anyone heard her.

"Don't stop," Ryan begged, her body on the edge.

And Beyoncé didn't stop, just leaned in, sinking her teeth into Ryan's neck. "Not yet," she whispered. She wanted more of her, needed her trembling.

Ryan groaned. She was so close, so ready. The tightness in her stomach ready to unravel.

"You can hold it for me right?" Beyoncé watched her, saw the struggle in her eyes. The desire to please, the need to release. "Right honey?" Her voice slightly darker.

"Uh— uh huh," Ryan was biting her lip now, teeth digging in as she forced herself not to let go like she really wanted to.

And Beyoncé continued thrusting, as Ryan's movements slowed. She was either gonna stop or she was going to cum. But Beyoncé wouldn't let up, her fingers pushing in herder, the palm of her hand slapping against Ryan's clit.

"Please bey— please m... mommy please i can't hold it, please." She was begging now which made Beyoncé dig her teeth into her lips.

She thrust a couple more times listening to Ryan as she continued to moan and beg. Then she heard the sound of another car approaching and rolled her eyes focusing back on Ryan.

"Come on baby. Let mama feel you. I want you all over my fingers. I want to feel you dripping all over me."

Ryan shuddered, her eyes rolling back and legs shaking as the world shattered around her. And Beyoncé kept her fingers inside, feeling Ryan's juices all over her hand and now a little on her pants.

"Fuck baby, you did such a good job for me," she said kissing all over Ryan's face. Ryan was still shuddering trying to recover from all of that.

Finally Bey slipped her fingers out licking over one of them before she held them up to Ryan's lips, "taste yourself baby, you taste so good."

Ryan did as told opening her mouth for Beyoncé's fingers. "Such a good girl," Beyoncé mused. "I'm so proud of you being such a good girl for mama." She was back to planting kisses all over Ryan's skin.

Ryan groaned, her brain finally catching up.

"I- I should go clean up," she said grateful they were still in the parking lot and could use the bathroom. But Beyoncé's eyes met hers with a soft shake of her head.

"No," was all she said, licking over her fingers again.

"Bey? I'm all covered in—"

"Not yet," Beyoncé repeated. Part of her wanted this car full of Ryan. She wanted Ryan's juices all over these seats, to smell her, to have her essence fill up the space. "You didn't want to wait so now you have to deal with it."

Ryan swallowed nervously climbing back into her seat. The drive back to the hotel was sticky and uncomfortable. Ryan felt so dirty but she felt so much better than she had before, her mind on Beyoncé and the music she was playing. She had the radio on, and Ryan didn't know why she never just played music from her phone. No one liked the radio this much.

Eventually, they were pulling up to the hotel and Ryan finally had a chance to get out of those clothes. Then she was on top of Beyoncé again, kissing her, letting Beyoncé grip her ass.

"Ry..." Beyoncé breathed trying to stop.

But Ryan wasn't listening, planting her lips on Beyoncé's neck. She'd been wanting this since she saw Beyoncé in that outfit. She looked so hot. So in control. So sexy.

"You look so good," she breathed and Beyoncé couldn't help smirking as those lips sucked against her skin.

"Ryan..." she wanted nothing more than to let her put those lips to use again. Or to grab the strap on and fuck her properly as Ryan started to rub their bodies together. But something told her Ryan was just trying to distract herself again.

"Let me take this off for you," Ryan's hands were already at the hem of her hoodie.

"Ry.." Beyoncé groaned again, gripping Ryan's hands to stop her. "Later baby," she said with all the strength she could muster. "Come on honey, we both have work to do."

The younger one rolled her eyes. She wasn't exactly expecting Beyoncé to forget, but she still didn't want to actually do her work. She could tell Beyoncé had her mind set on this though.

Ryan got out her laptop and put it on her lap as she sat on the sofa, before she watched Beyoncé set up hers on the table. She plugged in her charger and she had a small table to put beneath the laptop itself so it was closer to her face. Ryan smirked at the sight of her pressing those thin glasses up her nose bridge. There was something so adorable about when she looked like this.

Eventually, Ryan tore her eyes away from the beauty right in front of her and started working on her paper. Thankfully, she'd done most of the research she needed to, so it was just a matter of actually writing it.

She heard Beyoncé typing which encouraged her and she started to write again. She eventually got into a flow typing up what she'd read and her thoughts on the topic. She wasn't paying much attention to her surroundings, Beyoncé fading softly into the background.

Minutes could've gone by or hours for all she knew. But eventually she heard the little doorbell which brought her out of her trance and back into the room. Beyoncé, now dressed in a robe got up to answer and in rolled a tray.

"Thank you so much," she spoke in that warm southern accent and then Ryan heard another voice thank Beyoncé profusely in return. She wondered how big the tip had been. Then Beyoncé lifted the laptop from her legs and placed her knees either side of Ryan.

"Are you almost done with your work honey?" She asked, practically straddling her.

Ryan nodded. She just had to write a conclusion and that was it. She needed a break from screens and typing anyway; so she was all too happy when Beyoncé gazed at her wearing that same relaxed expression she liked.

"Come let's eat" Beyoncé said clearing the table so they could spread the food out.

Ryan sat down and started eating and it was like in that moment everything slipped away from her. She couldn't keep feeling these ups and downs. Beyoncé was there trying to talk to her and Ryan just snapped, swallowing her food.

"What are we doing here anyway?" Ryan asked rolling her eyes.

Beyoncé raised a brow. Did Ryan just raise her voice? Bey examined her face for a moment, brows furrowed, eyes narrowed. She really did look angry for some reason.

"Why don't you tell me what's wrong honey?" Beyoncé had no idea what just happened.

Ryan sighed, rolled her eyes and realised she had to say something instead of just being mad. "It's just..." she looked up at those warm hazel eyes again and rolled her own. Flirting with Beyoncé was so easy and simple. Being around her was just as easy. But how long could easy last? "I'm sick of this. Like what are we doing?"

Beyoncé frowned and then said. "I dont know, we already spoke about this last time," she said which just pissed Ryan off even more. Beyoncé wanted to keep fucking her and taking her on dates. But, at the same time, she wanted this to just be fun. How was that supposed to work?

"Ugh," Ryan rolled her eyes.

"Why don't you tell me what you want us to be doing?" Beyoncé asked in that curious voice she used that sounded like she already knew all the answers.

Ryan rolled her eyes again. Beyoncé was taunting her. She knew what she wanted but saying it sounded crazy. She couldn't exactly tell her she wanted to be with her and that she didn't give a fuck about her daughter because she wanted her. So instead, Ryan just shrugged. "I don't know."

"Okay," Beyoncé could tell she was being difficult but she let it go. Ryan was too pretty to argue with. And besides, she was bored of having this conversation. "Well I'll tell you what I want." She raised a brow waiting and Ryan nodded.

"I want to keep doing this," she tucked a finger under her chin. "I really like you Ryan, and I'm sorry I can't tell you that I want anything more right now but I just can't risk that... not right now. Not with Brooke." She ran her hand through her hair and sighed.

"I know," Ryan felt a rock in her stomach.

"It's just, I'm still working on things with her and her dad — not like that, she wants us to be cordial and I want him to fall off of a cliff. I just don't think that she would forgive me. And I know that's not fair on you but you know, she has to come first."

Beyoncé looked down. That was probably the most she'd ever spoken about Brooklyn with Ryan. She was always the unspoken elephant in the room. Then Beyoncé stiffened, catching herself before she spilled it all. That was none of Ryan's business.

"I'm gonna go," Ryan said jerking away. She understood what Beyoncé was saying. She just didn't like it.

She stood up and Beyoncé grabbed her hand to stop her. "Honey?" She said looking into Ryans pissed off eyes. Ryan just sighed tugging her hand away and walked out of the room.

————————————-[A/N]Thoughts on Ryan? That was a lot for one day. Her parents? The sex? Then leaving?

Ok I lied. Beyoncé lore is coming next chapter.... Or maybe the chapter after that.... But it's coming 😭 yalls theories on what this chapter was gonna be were hilarious though.

Also if Bey and Ryan were gonna go on a date what should it be? Give me your ideas