Chapter 77

Sam's POV

Back to New York with my own little family. It's weekend and I have much work to do so Bianca and I decided to stay in our apartment besides that Logan cant stop crying.

"Babe, did you see my transparent paper case?" I shout as I cant find my work file.

"On your desk." Bianca shouts back.

I walk to my desk and looking for my paper case until I got it but something fall to thr ground. This is Bianca's college assignment.

I let out a sigh and want to put those paper go back to the map. But something cathes my eyes. She write about dyslexic children?

What is this? She hide it from me and didnt tell me that she made me as her science for her assignment? Or she afraid that our children will get dyslexia like their father? Seriously, this is stupid and I dont like that.

And then, what's next? BERA test to avoid children become deaf or dyslexic? And Bianca didnt tell me? What is on her mind huh?

I know I'm stupid. I didnt go to college and I have dyslexic but what is this? Why she did this thing to me.

"Sam, Logan got fever and I guess we should bring him to the doctor." Bianca walks in while holding Logan.

"What is this?" I glare at her and show her those paper. "Dyslexic children? BERA test? What the hell was that? You afraid that our children will get dyslexic problem like their father?!"

"That's my college assignments and I have to write about that!" Bianca frowns at me.

"You used me for your science project? How sucks!"

"Sam, please we can talk about this later. Your son is sick and we need to bring him to the doctor!"

"You afraid that your children will get dyslexic like me right? Bring him alone." I simply said to her and walk to the living room.

I'm mad. It's like she is underestimate me. I sit down on the sofa in living room and go back finishing my work that I've been doing.

"Landon is sleeping on his crib. I take the car and will bring Logan to the doctor. If Landon cries, feed him his food. He must be hungry." Bianca says then walks off.

I didnt say anything and keep looking at my laptop until Landon suddenly cries. I let out a sigh and walk to his room.

He is awake and crying. I take him from his crib and hold him. And he is still crying. I went out from his room and walk to the kitchen. I see that Bianca already made him food in a bowl so I decided to make it heat in the microwave.

Landon cant stop shaking his feet while crying and touche his bowl and make all those food fall down to the ground.

I sigh and my mind suddenly start thinking. What kind of father I am? I cant even heat Landon's food. What the hell I've done?

Only Bianca who can do all these things by herself and I let her bring Logan to the doctor alone? I hate myself right now.

Bianca's POV

"You afraid that your children will get dyslexic like me right? Bring him alone." Sam simply said then went out from our room.

Tears slowly fall down to my face. But Logan really need to go to the doctor because I'm afraid that he will getting worse.

I wipe my tears and take Logan's baby's carrier. And hold him. I cant believe that Sam mad at me because of that and he doesnt wanna listen to my explanation.

I went out from my room after wear Logan his warm clothes.

"Landon is sleeping on his crib. I take the car and will bring Logan to the doctor. If Landon cries, feed him his food. He must be hungry." I said to Sam and take the car key from the drawer near the door.

Sam didnt answer me and keep looking at his laptop. I just let out a sigh then went out from my apartment.

I know he mad at me but at least he understand that one of his son is sick right now and I need his help but what he has done to me? I also know that I hide those things from him because I'm afraid that he will feel wothless when actually he is not.

I enter the basement parking lot and get into our car. I place Logan in the back seat and wear him the seatbelt. I walk to the drive seat and start driving away from my apartment building to hospital.

I really wanna cry right now but I hold it. I shouldnt cry because my son needed me right now. Logan needed his mother and here I am. I just hope that Sam wont make Landon as his victim of his anger.

Twenty minutes and we finally arrived in the hospital. I park my car and lift Logan's up who fall asleep and his body is really burning up.

"Can I meet any doctor for kids here? My son got fever." I said to the receptionist.

"Your son's name? Age?" The receptionist asks me.

"Logan Evans, he is seventh months old." I said to the receptionist.

"Alright Mrs. Evans, just wait until your baby's name get call. We will call you." The receptionist smiles at me.

I just half-smile back at her then walk to the waiting sits and sit down there while holding Logan that still fall asleep. I just hope that he only get fever like usual fever not any kind of danger ill or anything.

"I'm here, honey. I know what you feel when you got fever like this." I kiss Logan's cheek and still holding him.

"Mrs. Evans, it's your turn." A nurse come to me then walk lead me.

I keep holding Logan and walk in behind her until she stops her way and open a door of a room for me.

"Thank you." I half-smile at her.

She just smiles at me. I enter the room and a mature woman doctor is sit down in front of her desk.

"Can I help you, Mrs. Evans? I'm Dr. Geraldine." The doctor stands up from her seat and then let me to sit down.

"My son got fever and he cant stop crying since this morning when he woke up. I'm afraid that something bad gonna happen to him." I said to her.

"Lay his body on that bed." The doctor says to me.

I walk to the bed and lay Logan's body on the bed but he is suddenly wake up and crying. He must be know that I left his body and stop hugging him.

"Aww you become spoilt to mommy when you're sick?" Dr. Geraldine chuckles at Logan while checking him out. "He only get baby cold. It will gone soon. I hope that he want to eat some fruits so it will help to clear his flu." She said to me.

"God, I'm afraid that he will get dangerous ill." I sigh.

"Dont worry too much, Mrs. Evans. I will give him a vitamin and you can put this vitamin to his food or his milk. He already can eat solid food right?"

"Yes. But he has a twin brother. Will his twin get infected?" I ask.

"As long as they are not sleeping in the same crib thats fine. Here is the vitamin receipt and a baby cold syrup, give it to him after he eat his food and put the vitamin to his food or his milk." The doctor gave me a receipt.

"Thank you so much, Dr. Geraldine." I smile at her and take that receipt.

"You're welcome, Logan. Hope you will feel better." Dr. Geraldine smiles back at us.

I just smile then walk off from her office then turn my way to back to the receptionist to complete the administration and pick the vitamin and medicine for Logan.

After that I went out from the hospital and walk to the parking lot. I place Logan in the back seat and he just looking at me. I walk to the drive seat and start driving back to my apartment.

Actually, I really wanna tell about this to Blaine but I cant since Logan is sick and need to take a rest besides that I'm worry about Landon also this is my inside problem with Sam. God.

I enter the basement parking lot to park my car in my apartment building. After that I take Logan and his medicine and lock the car. He is really look like a clown with thick sweater and a beanie hat.

We enter the lift and I press the number six to get to the sixth floor. Then we went out from the lift and Logan lean his head on my shoulder as I lift him and hold him and he put his hand around my neck.

I press the door knob of my apartment door. I get in Sam is still working with his laptop with Landon is sitting down on the carpet floor and playing with his toys.

I walk to my sons's room and place Logan on his crib. "Stay here and dont cry, mommy gonna cook your food and you have to drink your medicine, okay." I said to Logan.

He just look at me and seems like he understand what I said to him. I went out from his room then walk to the kitchen. Sam didnt say anything to me and I dont know how long he is wanna be still like this.

I turn my face at Landon and he want put his toys to his mouth. "Dont, Landon. That's not food, honey." I said to him.

Sam turns his face at Landon and take that toys away from Landon's hand. I didnt say anything and make food for Logan and put his vitamin to his food.

After that I take the bowl also his mug and walk to Logan's room. I place the food on their mini table and then I take him from his crib and he just look at me then lean his head on my chest.

"You dont want to eat, honey? I know that cold is sucks but you have to eat." I said to Logan and place him on his mini chair.

I'm sitting down in front of him and start feeding him. But he doesnt want to swallow his food, he just put it to his mouth then let it out.

"Logan, you have to eat and get recovery. You really like uncle Blaine now, who doesnt wanna eat anything when you are sick." I said to Logan.

I keep trying to feed him and he finally want to eat even though not really much. I'm smiling at Logan, at least he want to eat.

After that I bring his bowl and his mug to the kitchen and wash his dishes. I see that Sam and Landon is fall asleep together in the sofa. Landon is laying on Sam's chest and they close their eyes together.

As long as I'm disappointed with what happen today and what Sam said. He is my husband and he is the father of my sons. I take the blanket on the other side of the sofa and cover their body with that blanket then turn off the tv.

I walk back to Logan's room and let him drink his cold syrup. After that I lift him then place him on the sofa bed in his room. Logan just look at me and raise his hand like he want me to hug him.

So I lay my body on that sofa bed next to him and hug him. Maybe this is what I feel when I got sick when I was baby, I never want to leave mom's hand I guess.

When I remember that things happened with me and Sam today, I just wanna cry. I dont mean to harrash him or anything. It's just my science project beside that he is smart and not look like a dyslexic person.

I kiss Logan's forehead and he fall asleep and still wearing his sweater and his beanie hat. I close my eyes and fall asleep while hugging him.

~~

Sam's POV

I woke up because I feel something warm on my belly. I look up and I guess Landon peeing on my clothes. God.

Wait, who cover this blanket to us? It must be Bianca. What kind of husband and dad I am now? I dont even help her when Logan is sick.

I rise and hold Landon's body and he is awake after peeing his dad. I take off his pants and place his pants to the dirty clothes basket.

I hold Landon and walk to his room to change his pants. Until I see that Bianca is sleeping with Logan and hugging each other.

I know that every child will be spoilt to their mom when they are sick. But what kind of father I am? I dont even let Bianca explain her reason and let her carried Logan to the doctor alone.

I take Landon's pants and place him on the changing table. After that I hold Landon and lay his body on the sofabed next to Logan and I lay my body on the edge side of Landon.

I rub Bianca's cheek and kiss her forehead. "I'm so sorry, I should be like this to you. I never grow up and you always hold it alone for our children's sake. I dont know what my children gonna be if they dont have a mother like you, baby. I'm so sorry for making you disappointed like this and let you carried Logan to the hospital alone when I know you needed me. I'm so sorry." I said while rubbing her cheek

Suddenly she opened her eyes slowly and look at me until tears fall down from her face.

Bianca's POV

"I'm so sorry, I should be like this to you. I never grow up and you always hold it alone for our children's sake. I dont know what my children gonna be if they dont have a mother like you, baby. I'm so sorry for making you disappointed like this and let you carried Logan to the hospital alone when I know you needed me. I'm so sorry."

I open my eyes slowly and Sam is rubbing my cheek and wake me up. I just look at him until tears slowly fall down to my face. I'm tired to hold all my pain alone. This is sucked me up.

"I'm so sorry and please dont cry because of that. I know that I cant be a good husband for you and be a good father for our sons. I'm so sorry." Sam said to me.

I didnt answer him but sit up from that sofa bed. I dont want my children wake up because of our argue and let them know about our argue.

"Dont wake them up." I simply said then went out from my sons's room and sit down on the sofa in the living room.

"Babe, I'm so sorry. I know I was really selfish. I dont even let you explain and let you carried Logan to the doctor alone. I'm so sorry." Sam says to me and make me facing him.

"That BERA test is brainstem evoked response audiometry. It's good for baby to help them response what we said to them. And those dyslexia paper is only a thing to finish my physological assignments. I dont hide it from you, it's just I think that I dont have to tell you all my college assignments because it's not really necessary for me. I dont even realize that your dyslexis still happening because I think that you're so smart in anything." I said to him.

Sam suddenly pulls my body and hugs me really tight. "I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, baby. I really love you and I shouldnt mad at you like this."

"No, that was also my fault. I shouldnt be like that." I push his body slowly and look at him.

"But I know that everytime we fight you always hold it alone and trying to be strong so your sons wont see you cry but I know you hurt and I always be the one who made you cry." Sam tears fall down.

I wipe his tears and shake my head. "Because we have our own family now, and tell our problem to someone outside of this house which mean that I tell them about my secret and I never want to tell my secret to any other people." I said to Sam.

Sam suddenly kisses my forehead and hugs me. "I love you so much. I never wrong to choose you as my wife and the mother of my children because you are our lights in the darkness." Sam kisses my head.

I hug him back. "I'm so sorry, Sam."

"Sssh that was my fault so stop that saying your sorry." Sam rubs my back.

"You wear wet tshirt?" I raise my eyebrows and push his body away slowly.

"Damn! I'm forget to change my clothes. Landon peeing in my clothes when he fall asleep with me." Sam sighs.

"Wait, he sleep next to Logan? Oh no!" I suddenly said and make a little run to move Landon to his crib.

I take Landon and place him in his crib then pull his little blanket to cover his body. Then take Logan's body and place him on his crib then pull his blanket to cover him.

"What happened?" Sam asks me.

"Logan got cold and Landon will get infected if he sleep next to Logan." I sigh and turn on the baby's monitor.

Sam put his hand around my shoulder and kisses my forehead. "They have the best mother in the world."

I turn my face at Sam and smile at him until I put my hand around his shoulder and kiss him softly. Sam put his hand around my waist and kisses me back. I know that every fight we made, we can make it up again.

I take Sam's shirt and he open his tshirt then throw it to the ground. I sigh and about to take that but Sam cups my cheeks and start kissing me again.

"I want you to open your shirt and clean it not because I want to have something hot with you while our babies sleeping." I said to Sam then take his tshirt and went out.

I take all the dirty clothes from the dirty basket and put into the washing machine.

"I think that we better clean this apartment while the babies is sleeping." Sam walks in.

"Why not. I wash the clothes and you can clean the living room and our bedroom also the kitchen with vacuum cleaner." I turn my face at Sam.

"Alright but..." Sam suddenly hug me from behind and kisses my cheek.

"Sammy..."

"One round before we clean the house." Sam smirk through my skin.

"No." I shake my head and push his hand away and turn my face to the washing machine.

"Ugh fine." Sam rolls his eyes then turn his body about to leave.

I just giggle then rolls my eyes and jump to his back and folded my feet on his belly and wrap my hand around his neck. "Dont get bored with that, daddy." I giggle.

"Babe, dont get mad at me but how much you gain now?" Sam asks.

"So you mean that I'm fat now? You said that I'm getting fatter." I frown at him and stand up from his back.

"You're not fat, okay. You still look like high school girl." Sam rolls his eyes.

"But you asked me about how much weigh I gain." I frown at Sam.

"Because you're getting little bit..."

"Fat, right? I'm fat? You said that I'm fat?" I raise my eyebrows at him.

"Yes, fat." Sam sighs.

"Sam!!!!" I shout.

Sam let out a sigh and rolls his eyes and he suddenly kisses me and make me stop shouting because he called me fat.

"I dont care how fat are you. You're my wife and I love you, that's it." Sam says to me.

"That's cheesy." I chuckle.

"Want one round before we finish this housekeeping things?" Sam begs me.

I shake my head. "No, we should....hatchiiiii." I suddenly sneezing and I feel like my nose is really bothering me.

"You sick, babe?" Sam raises his eyebrows at me.

"Maybe Logan's cold move to me now. But it's fine." I said to him.

"You take a rest, I will clean the whole apartment." Sam strokes my hair.

"It's fine. I'm still can wash those clothesnor tomorrow you dont have any clean clothes to work." I said to Sam.

"Alright, if you need any help just tell me. I want to clean our bedroom, the living room and the kitchen with vacuum cleaner." Sam says to me then walk off.

Yeah I guess that Landon's cold moved to me now. I got infected but that's fine as long as my son get recovery soon.

I start the washing machine. While waiting, I take those clean clothes and start ironing it. Actually we can use a laundry enterprise but since we want to limit the living costs since we have to provide everything by our own.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Finally, it's finish." Sam sighs and sit down on the sofa next to me then lean his head on my shoulder.

I cant stop sneezing and rub my nose. This cold really bothering me but I already done cleaning the house and cleaned those dirty clothes. See? I can live without servants.

Sam take a blanket and cover my shoulder with that blanket. "I'm not freezing, Sam."

"Want to see the doctor?" Sam asks me.

"You better stay away from me and Logan before you get infected with us." I said to Sam.

"How the hell I can stay away from you when we live in the same apartment and sleeping on the same bed." Sam rolls his eyes.

"I'm hungry." I simply said.

"Since we dont go to anywhere today? Want to order pizza?" Sam asks.

"Sounds good besides I'm too lazy to cook and I also know you're tired." I nod as agree.

Sam walks to the phone and start call the pizza. I lay my body on the sofa and still sneezing because of this cold.

He then walk back and sit down on the carpet floor right in front of me and turn on the tv.

"Dont too loud or you will wake the babies up." I said to Sam.

"I didnt." Sam simply answer.

I'm still cant stop sneezing until Sam stand up from his seat then pull my body and sit down next to me. He take that blanket to cover my body then I lay my body and lean my head on his lap.

"You sick and Logan sick after that we will get sick." Sam says.

"Yeah because flu is so easy to get infected." I said.

"When we can take the kids of BERA test? How much it will costs?" Sam suddenly asks.

"You really want to do that test for our kids?" I raise my eyebrows.

"Babe, you know what best for our kids so I follow you." Sam strokes my hair.

"It's up to you. One of my friend in college told me that in only cost about 600 bucks for two babies."

"Alright next week we can go to the hospital and get our babies has their BERA test." Sam said to me.

"But you better call dad, first. I mean he took control with the whole hospital thing after Logan and Landon born right? If he already give our sons that BERA test in his hospital right after they born, we dont have to do that twice." I said to Sam.

"You're such an amazing mom." Sam smiles at me.

"Wake me up when the pizza come." I simply said to him and close my eyes.

I feel like Sam keep stroking my hair with his hand while he watch the tv. We might fighted today but we can make it up by our hand. I just hope that no more fight like this in our house.

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