016

The sheets behind you still linger with the fading scent of Billy's body, his after-shave, his sweat. The air around you is sticky, filled with the smell of the sex you just had. It still tickles everywhere he touched you, your lips feel plump from all his rough kisses. You're sitting on the edge of your bed, sliding an oversized hoodie over your head, listening to the faint sounds of the shower running across the hallway, mixing with the carefree humming of Billy, who's freshening up in there. He's unbothered, as always. Not a care in the world is clouding his mind. And you feel like the walls are closing in. You sigh and stand up to put on a dark jeans, before opening up your window to let the cold October air in. While taking some deep breaths of fresh oxygen, you step over to your dirty mirror to start getting ready for the day. Guilt is hammering in your chest as you put your hair up. Billy, Eddie. Lauren. You feel bad, feel like you're betraying them all simultaneously. But have no idea how to detangle any of this.

Routinely, your fingers carefully start tapping concealer underneath your eyes, doing their best to cover the dark shadows last night's non-existing sleep brought you. You sigh, thinking back to the kiss that kept you from finding any rest. Eddie's face pops up in your head, his dark eyes as they glance down to you. His lips, warm and soft, how they felt on yours when he kissed you like nothing else ever matters. How they felt on yours again, this morning, when you both ran into each other in your bathroom. And how they felt the third time within the last 12 hours, when you kissed him once more before letting him leave said bathroom again, after Billy almost caught you two. "Fucking pull yourself together", you hiss to your reflection, forcefully pushing those memories away and reaching for your mascara.

Stop thinking about this fucking kiss. And him.

The faucet next door squeaks lightly as it's being turned off again. You look right into your own eyes. Big pools of hazel and green tiredly blink back at you, Get over it, you think and quickly put the black liquid right on your lashes, before grabbing your bronzer to make your whole face look less dead, when hearing the bathroom door swinging open. Naked feet tab through the hallway and into your bedroom, and you can't help but shortly glance at Billy, who just came back in. With a towel - your towel - wrapped around his waist, his wet curls hanging in his face and the fruity scent of your shower gel filling the air around him, he smirks at you and confidently walks to your bed to grab his boxers and jeans to put back on. His smirk lingers as he catches your glance in the mirror again, a silent reminder of what transpired just moments ago. You can't help but check out his abs again before pulling your gaze away from him while hearing him carelessly dropping the towel to the floor. "You look good", he comments as he pulls on his jeans, making you smile softly and immediately blush when noticing the cheeky wink he gives you when closing his zipper. With his bare chest still damp from the shower and his wet hair dripping on his shoulders, he's now scanning your bedroom for his favorite shirt, throwing a helpless glance at you. You remember how you two stumbled into your apartment last night, drunk and horny while hectically taking off each other's clothes. "Maybe try looking for it in the kitchen", you mumble amusedly, sharing a flirty look with him as he chuckles lightly and nods, before leaving your room. Your eyes follow his naked back until he's out of sight, you just turned to close the window again when hearing a hectic knock at your front door, echoing through the apartment.

Your heart jumps in your chest, panic sets in as your mind brings up just one word. Eddie.

"Hey, you gettin' that, or...?", Billy shouts from the kitchen, breaking your trance. "Yeah, I'm coming", you reply loud enough for him to hear while hurrying out of your room, hearing another row of impatient knocks from your front door and trying to not let your panic take over. Blue eyes follow you through the living space as you walk through, stopping at the door with your hand hovering over the doorknob, taking a short, sharp breath before eventually opening it, only to find -

"Robin?"

She's standing there, windblown and slightly disheveled in her dark jeans jacket, her sharp blue eyes scanning your face immediately. She doesn't wait for an invitation, stepping inside and brushing past you. "Oh, thank God", she sighs, tossing a look over her shoulder, "For a second, I thought I was gonna find you dead or something. I've been knocking for ages" You blink, still trying to get a grip on yourself, the tension in your chest slowly dissipating. "I- uh, sorry. I wasn't expecting..." Robin stops in her tracks, her gaze landing on the kitchenette across the room, where Billy casually watches you while slowly putting his unbuttoned shirt back on. Her expression doesn't shift; if anything, it's resigned. She's not surprised, but her raised eyebrows and the subtle tilt of her head speak volumes. "Hargrove", she says flatly, "Wasn't expecting you to... still be around". Billy smirks, starting to button up the dark red fabric. "Buckley", he replies, his voice smooth and mocking. "To what do we owe the pleasure?" Your friend crosses her arms, her eyes flicking between him and you. "Girl talk", she states simply, throwing a telling gaze at you before focusing back on Billy, "So, if you don't mind...". He chuckles, "I get it" while flashing Robin one of his cocky grins as he comes closer, "Was about to leave anyways". He quickly slides into his black boots and grabs his leather jacket from the couch, giving you a crooked smirk when reaching for the doorknob behind you. Robin already stepped to the side to take off her jacket, interestingly watching him as he leaves. Before you can even react, Billy suddenly presses a kiss to your lips, his hand giving your hip a playful squeeze. With big eyes, you watch him walk through the doorframe, turning to you girls one last time and flashing you another smug smirk. "Buckley", he mumbles again, nodding in her direction as a goodbye before turning his attention to you. "Thanks for your time", he mumbles in a flirty tone, "I'll see you soon". The door clicks shut behind him, leaving an awkward, charged silence in his wake.

Robin exhales sharply, her hands on her hips as she blinks at you, "Did he just kiss you goodbye?". You groan, burying your face in your hands, "Don't start, please"."Oh, I will so be asking you all the questions about what I just saw", Robin states while heading over to your couch, plopping down on the cushion with an exaggerated sigh, "But first, I have to be the one talking". You flop down next to her, pulling your legs up to your chest and looking at her. "Sure, what's going on?"

"So", she starts, tugging at her sleeves, "Last night was... something. Thanks again for forcing us to leave that school bands party and head for the bonfire instead, by the way". She glances at you, you just wave her off and wait for her to continue. "So... Vickie and I talked for hours. Like, about music, her stupid obsession with ketchup, the weird things she and her siblings do for Halloween..." She trails off, a soft smile creeping onto her lips. "We really got to know each other, not just while playing stupid drinking games. Sam, it was perfect. And then, on the way home, we sat on the backseat together and she- uh-... leaned her head on my shoulder. And it felt like..."She just gestures vaguely, her voice faltering. "I don't know. It felt right, you know? But now - I'm losing my mind trying to figure out if she's, y'know... into girls. Or if she was just drunk and tired and using me as a headrest. And I'm trying to not loose my mind, but this is killing me because I like her so fucking much, Sam, and I'm scared to tell her because I don't wanna... ruin it. What if I'm interpreting way too much into this?". Her blue eyes glance at you, helpless, and she sighs again.You offer a small smile, reaching out to squeeze her hand. "Robs, take a deep breath, okay? She leaned on you. Not the window, or anyone else. Nor did she take the passenger seat, right? She sat in the back with you. That has to mean something, right?" Your friend shrugs, her expression a mixture of hope and doubt. "Maybe. I just... I don't want to get my hopes up, you know? What if I'm reading too much into it?". "Listen, there are moments in life we need to just... do it, you know? Just listen to your guts, Robs. Don't force it, just let it find its way on its own. You'll know if she's interested, I promise you that. And by what I saw at the bonfire, how she laughed at basically anything you said - and we both know your jokes are horrible - or how she looked at you with such shiny eyes? I'm certain she is". "Really?", she whispers, her eyes starting to fill with more hope. You hum and nod lightly, "Yeah, but, as I said - don't push it, okay? As far as you told me, she's only been with boys before. So she's either been keeping that side of her a secret, or she's just discovering it herself. Give her some time, okay? Show interest, but don't scare her. Just be yourself, Bucks. She'll love you""Thank you", she sighs again, deeply and gives you a thankful smile. "So, you think I should ask her to go to the movies with me? Or is that too pushy?". "No", you smile and shake your head, "It's not. Sounds like a great idea to me". "Oh my god, I'm so relieved", she chuckles, "I was stressing so hard about all of this". You're about to respond when she cuts you off with a sharp look, her eyes narrowing slightly. "But enough about my lesbian crisis. What the hell happened with you last night? Because I know that goodbye Billy just gave you, after staying at your apartment until noon and showering here? That's some relationship stuff you're doing, aren't you? I mean, I saw you at the party last night, but you two were hammered so I didn't really think about it. But now? Is there anything you wanna tell me about him?". You sigh, burying your face in your hands. "Oh, trust me. You don't even want to know". "Oh, but I do, baby", she says, leaning forward eagerly. "Spill. All of it"

You give her a long look. "You can't tell anyone, okay?". Eagerly, she nods, "Self-explanatory". "Okay...", you take a big breath and tell her the whole story. Starting at the kiss that happened with Eddie weeks ago when both of you were at the schools library, although you did tell her that back then, too. Then, fast forward, going back to last night. Every messy, mortifying detail spills from your lips - the drunken stumble into the apartment with Billy, the almost-kitchen escapade, Eddie catching you both mid-hookup. You tell her about the fight that nearly broke out between them, how you had to drag Billy to your room to stop them from throwing punches, how you couldn't sleep from all the adrenaline, couldn't stop thinking back to the look in Eddie's eyes when he saw you two together. Robin just listens, her eyes widening from time to time, but she stays silent. Then you get to the late-night shower, the weed in the kitchen you wanted to smoke just to get some rest, and the kiss with Eddie that suddenly happened. Her jaw drops, but she still doesn't interrupt. You recount the intensity of it, the way it made you feel. How he made your heart race. And then you tell her how you pushed him away, how you told him it couldn't happen, only to run into him again this morning in the bathroom. When you get to the part about Lauren and her chipper comments about Eddie being amazing in bed, Robin's eyes widen even more. "Oh my God", she breathes. "That's bad bad. Like, daytime soap-level bad". You nod miserably, your voice breaking as you describe the second kiss with him, the one in the bathroom, and how Billy almost caught you both. How Eddie had to hide in the shower, listening to Billy flirt with you and kiss you like nothing was wrong.

"And then", you continue, your voice barely above a whisper, 'When he was just about to sneak out, I... kissed him again. And it felt... different. I don't know, it was the first time I intended the kiss, I just couldn't help myself, it was just like a reflex or something. Fuck. Well, he left only minutes later, after another showdown with Billy in the kitchen, of course. And as if that wasn't enough confusion already-" You pause, looking down at your hands. "God, I hate myself for doing that. Instead of getting some space to clear my head, Billy... y'know. We... well, how do I say this in a nice way - we had sex. Again. And it was great, and he's so good to me". For a few seconds, Robin just stares at you, processing everything you just told her. She groans, throwing herself back against the cushions dramatically. "Jesus H. Christ, you're living in a freaking soap opera! What the hell are you doing? All of that happened within, what - 12 hours?". "I don't know!", you exclaim, your voice cracking, "I don't know what I'm doing, Robin! Everything's such a mess, and I feel awful, but I just..." You trail off, groaning annoyedly. She sits up, her expression softening as she reaches out to pat your knee. "Hey, relax. It's okay. Well, it's not okay, but it's not the end of the world. Yet." You let out a shaky laugh while leaning back into the worn down cushions, "Thanks for that". She smirks. "Anytime. So... what are we gonna do about all this?". "I have no idea. And, as if I'm not feeling guilty enough for kissing them both within minutes, I feel horrible because of Lauren. She was so sweet about Eddie, I can never tell her I kissed that man she's starting to grow feelings for. I mean, what kind of friend am I? We live together, and I kissed him! Ugh, I'm awful. Lucky you we're not interested in the same gender". Robin snorts and gives you a sympathetic look, her hand squeezing your knee once more. "Calm down, Sam. Let's try to detangle this chaos you call your love life, okay?". You nod and look at her with big eyes. "Okay", she sighs and scratches her neck, "So... What's going on with Billy, exactly. Are there, like... feelings involved? Is it just a fling, an affair? What do you feel when he's with you?". For a moment, you think about her question, thinking about Billy and the times you spent together. All the great sex you had, of course - but also all the times you shared a bed, cuddled up while asleep. The black eye he got from his father, after standing up for you when Mr Hargrove called you a slut and kicked you out of his house. How he stayed at a motel with you for three days, when both of you couldn't go back home. He's been there to keep you company, making you laugh, giving you a good feeling. Never caring about any rumors that started spreading about you, just doing what he felt like. No labels, no pressure. No responsibilities. No feelings. Just... fun. Right? "I feel... good, when he's around". Robin tilts her head, studying you carefully. "Good? That's it? Just... good?"You frown, wrapping your arms around your knees. "I mean, yeah. He's fun, you know? He's... easy to be around. I don't have to overthink anything when it's just him and me". She narrows her eyes, clearly not buying it. "Okay. And when he's not around? Like when you're not in the middle of your 'no-strings-attached' thing? How do you feel about him then?". You frown again, "What do you mean?", causing her to sigh. "I mean, do you think of him when he's not with you? Do you miss him?"The question catches you off guard, and you glance down at your hands. The truth feels slippery, hard to pin down. "I don't know", you admit, "I don't sit around thinking about Billy when he's not here. He's... he's just Billy. He gives me what I need, whether it's sex, a cuddle or someone to make me laugh". Robin nods slowly, leaning back into the couch. "Okay. So he's not the problem." Your head snaps up. "What?". Blue eyes gaze back at you. "You're not torn over Billy, Sam" she says matter-of-factly. "He's hot, the sex is great, he's been a decent friend - fine. But you're not exactly writing sonnets about him". She raises an eyebrow. "But Eddie? That's a whole other story, isn't it?". You stiffen, the guilt that's been gnawing at you all day rearing its ugly head again. "I don't know what you're talking about", you mutter, suddenly finding a loose thread on your hoodie very interesting when hearing her scoffs. "Oh, please. You've kissed Eddie three times in less than 12 hours, and you can't even say his name without blushing. That's not nothing. You two have something going on between you, and not just since yesterday". You groan, throwing your head back against the cushions. "It feels like nothing. Or... at least, it should feel like nothing. It was just a stupid, drunk mistake". Robin snorts. "And the second and third time? This morning? Let me guess - you weren't drunk then, were you?" Fucking hell. You press your palms to your face, muffling your voice as you admit, "No, I wasn't". "Yeah, exactly". The cushions move lightly as she leans forward, her voice gentler now. "Look, I'm not saying you're in love with the guy or anything, but maybe it's time to figure out what the hell is going on in that head of yours. Because right now? You're not just hurting yourself. You've got Billy, Eddie, and Lauren caught up in this mess. And the longer you let it go on, the worse it's gonna get. You know it, I know it - we all know it". She's right. You know she's right. But the thought of actually sorting through your feelings - confronting them - makes your chest tighten. "I don't do feelings, Robs", you eventually say, causing her to sigh deeply. She leans back against the couch, crossing her arms over her chest as she gives you a pointed look, "Yeah, I've noticed. That's kind of your whole thing, isn't it? No feelings, no attachments, no mess" She pauses, her voice softening. "Except now there is a mess, Sam. And it's not going away just because you don't 'do feelings'". You huff, "I don't know how to deal with this, okay? I've always kept things simple - no strings, no drama. But now... now it's all tangled up, and I don't even know where to start." Your friend watches you quietly for a moment before scooting closer, her voice low and steady. "Look, I get it. Feelings are messy. They're scary as hell. But pretending they don't exist? That's not going to make them go away. If anything, it's just gonna make things worse." You glance at her, your chest tightening with the weight of her words. "What if I ruin everything?" you ask quietly, "What if I tell them how I feel - or don't feel - and it blows up in my face? And what about Lauren?". "Okay", she lifts her hand to give you a sign to calm down, "First of all, let's deal with this one step at a time. Lauren? She's the wildcard, yeah, but you haven't done anything unforgivable - yet. You kissed Eddie. Once, maybe twice..." - "Three times" you correct miserably, dropping your face into your hands. "Okay, three times. But it's not like you've been carrying on some secret affair. And for all we know, Eddie isn't even that serious about her. You said she was just starting to like him, right?". "Yeah," you mumble, "But that doesn't make it any better. She's my roommate, my friend. She trusts me. And I fucking feel like I betrayed her". "Relax, okay? You made a mistake. A big one, sure, but it's not the end of the world. You can fix this - if you want to. You just have to figure out what's worth saving here"Confused, you blink at her, the weight of her words sinking in as you ask, "What do you mean?". She shrugs lightly. "I mean, is Eddie even someone you want? Or was it just the heat of the moment, the forbidden thrill of it all? And Billy - same question. Is this a fling, or does it actually mean something to you? Because until you figure that out, you're just spinning your wheels and dragging everyone else along for the ride. And don't feel as if you betrayed her. It takes two people to kiss". You swallow hard before sighing again, "I don't know, Robs. I don't know what I feel. I'm probably terrified of making the wrong choice"Her shoulders move as she sighs, her blue eyes wander over your helpless face, "Sam, there's no such thing as a perfect choice. You're gonna hurt someone, no matter what you do. But staying stuck in this limbo? That's only gonna hurt everyone worse in the long run, okay?"For a second, you let her words sink in. You bite your lip, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. "I don't even know what I feel, Robs. For either of them". "Then figure it out", she says simply, "Take some time, think about what you want. Not what Billy wants, not what Eddie wants - what you want. And when you know? Be honest with them. They deserve that much, don't you think?". You nod slowly, "Yeah. They do". Robin squeezes your shoulder before standing up and heading toward the kitchen. "Good. Is there anything sugar loaded in this kitchen? I really need some endorphins after this talk" You let out a breathy laugh, reaching for your cigarettes on the coffee table to light one. "I think there's some ice cream left in the freezer". Her face lights up as she immediately strides toward the fridge, opening the freezer door. She rummages for a moment, pulling out a half-eaten tub of Rocky Road. "Not my first choice", she comments, "but beggars can't be choosers". You chuckle softly, exhaling a stream of smoke as you lean back into the couch. "There's some whipped cream in there too, if you're feeling fancy". She grins, grabs the tub and a spoon, pausing to snag the whipped cream from the fridge. "Oh, I'm absolutely feeling fancy. It's a post-crisis sugar binge - we're doing this right" With a deep sigh, she flops back down beside you, popping the lid off the ice cream and squirting a generous dollop of whipped cream on top. "Want some?". You shake your head, taking another drag of your cigarette, "Nah, I'm good. This one's all yours". Robin shrugs, digging in and taking a big spoonful, sighing dramatically as the chocolate and marshmallows hit her tongue. "Oh my God", she mumbles with her mouth full, "This is heaven. How have you not devoured this already?" Your lips curl into a smirk as you're flicking ash into the tray. "Because I usually go for the cigarettes and self-loathing combo. Ice cream's more your style". Your friend snorts, nudging you playfully with her elbow. "Well, maybe you should consider switching it up. Ice cream's way better for your soul - and your lungs". You glance at her, a small smile growing on your face as you give her a loving glance, "Thanks, Robs. For... y'know. Everything" She waves her spoon at you dismissively, her mouth full of ice cream. "Don't mention it. Just... promise me you'll figure this out, okay? No more running in circles" You nod, your smile fading a little. "I'll be there, whenever you need to talk, okay?", she adds, "We got this"

The apartment is quiet, sunlight spilling through the half-closed blinds as you sit cross-legged on the couch, your guitar resting against your thigh. The soft hum of your strumming fills the space. Robin left an hour ago. Telling her everything that's going on really made you feel lighter, more relaxed. She listened, gave you advice and made you laugh again, before leaving two hours later to go to work.

It's been weeks since you had a free day without any big plans, so, after quickly making yourself some Mac'n'Cheese for late lunch, you grabbed your beloved guitar and took some time just for yourself, enjoying the empty apartment and getting lost in your music all alone. No roommates, no band mates, no friends. Just you and your guitar. Your therapy. After going through some songs, you decided to have a look at the song you just finished writing. Losing Grip. You're still searching for the perfect sound of it, imagining the melody in your head but having issues with brining it to paper perfectly. So, you try around, strumming the strings while humming the melody, your notebook laid out next to you and a pen clamped between your lips, accordingly writing down some notes next to your written words. You pause, adjusting the guitar in your hands and rubbing at your temples. The melody is almost there, but something about the bridge isn't sitting right. You strum another few experimental chords, trying to find the right sound. The sound of the front door swinging open pulls you from your concentrated haze. Startled, your fingers slip, and the chord you were strumming warps into a harsh, discordant sound. You glance up and through the room, the pen falling from your lips and landing softly on the couch. Lauren steps into the apartment, her bag slung over one shoulder and her keys jingling in her hand. She sees you - sitting on the couch, still holding the guitar with your notebook sprawled open on the cushion beside you"Hey, rockstar, watcha doing?", she asks while smirking at you, throwing her keys into a bowl on a side table and sliding her bag and jacket from her shoulders. "Just... messing around, I guess", you chuckle awkwardly, watching her heading through the room up to you. "What is it, mh?", she asks interestingly when flopping onto the couch next to you, "A new riff idea?". You clear your throat and give her an unsure smirk, "Uh, no, actually... Nooo, Lauren, don't touch that". But it's too late, and your roommate already grabbed your opened notebook from the cushion next to you. Curious eyes wander over the page, her fingers tracing the scribbled lines of lyrics and chord notations as her brows slowly lift. "Wait a second," she says slowly, her voice laced with surprise. "You wrote a song?". You groan, running a hand through your hair and setting the guitar aside. "It's not finished," you mumble, your cheeks burning under her scrutiny as you avoid her gaze, feeling how she glances at you. "You never told me you wrote songs," she says, her tone caught between admiration and disbelief. "Yeah, well...", you shrug, folding your arms across your chest, "It's not exactly something I advertise". She looks back at the notebook, scanning the lines of Losing Grip. "This is... heavy", she says, her voice quieter now,"Is it about your dad?" Her words make your chest tighten, and for a moment, you can't find the right thing to say. Finally, you nod. "Yeah. It is." After what felt like an eternity, she finally closes the notebook gently, setting it back down on the couch and turns to face you fully, her expression earnest. "Sam, this is really good. Like, seriously. You've got something really special here"You let out a shaky laugh, trying to brush off the weight of her words while mumbling, "It's just something I do to clear my head. I don't even know if it's good" "It's more than good", she insists, "It's... raw and real. And I think it could be something incredible if you let it." Her words linger in the air, and for once, you don't feel the immediate urge to deflect or downplay your work. Instead, you meet her gaze and offer a small, hesitant smile. "Thanks", you say softly. Your roommate grins and nudges your shoulder playfully. "Now, are you gonna play it for me, or do I have to steal that guitar next?". Excitedly, she wiggles her brows at you, making you laugh while carefully picking up the guitar to adjust it on your lap. "Okay", you mumble, "But don't judge me. Like I said, it's not finished. And I'm a bad singer, too". "Wouldn't dream of it" she says, settling back into the couch and giving you her full attention, grinning widely, "I'm so excited, oh my god". You exhale nervously, taking a second to calm down your nerves, trying to imagine it's just you in the room. Then, you start strumming, the familiar chords grounding you as you let the melody fill the room. Your voice follows, tentative at first but growing steadier as you fall into the rhythm of the song.

By the time you finish, Lauren is staring at you, her expression a mix of awe and emotion. "Fuck. That was... amazing. What a song, Sam!" You glance away, feeling both vulnerable and oddly proud while feeling your cheeks blush lightly. "Thanks" you mutter, your fingers idly plucking at the strings, "But as I said, it'd sound better with a professional singer". "Are you kidding?", she laughs lightly, "You sound great. I honestly can't imagine Amy to sing it. You have to feel it, you know? And babe, trust me - you got the feels for it" She smiles, reaching out to squeeze your arm gently. "I'm serious. You've got something here, Sam. Don't hide it, okay? Maybe show it to the rest of the band tonight, mh? We could really make this work". "Uh, I don't know if that's a good idea", you mumble unsurely, "It's not done yet, and I'm...". "Scared", she interrupts, "Because it makes you vulnerable. I got it. Think about it, okay? It really has a big potential". You both share a long glance. Finally, you nod. "Okay". "Great", she sighs and stands up again, "Speaking of the band - I'll just need a few minutes to change and find a bite to eat, and I'll be ready to leave for rehearsal". "Okay, yeah", you give her a small smile, "I'll wait. There's some leftover Mac'n'Cheese in the fridge, by the way". "Ugh", she groans while walking through the living space, "You're the best roommate ever". You laugh lightly and watch her head to her room to change. And within a second, your smile dies. Lauren is so excited about your song, practically bounced on the couch as she insisted you show the band later. She believes in you, trusts you, and here you are, carrying around this secret that will only hurt her if she ever finds out. You betrayed her. You kissed the guy she's growing feelings for. After she told you that. The thought makes your stomach churn. You keep telling yourself it didn't matter - it was just a stupid kiss. But deep down, you know better. Secrets like this have a way of festering, of breaking things apart, and you aren't sure how long you can keep pretending it doesn't weigh on you.

Later Amy's garage, Riverside

The garage is filled with the thick air of a very successful rehearsal as you lean against the wall, wiping your forehead with the back of your hand with your bandmates start packing up their gear. The past few hours have been a blur of chords, melodies, and pounding rhythms. It was amazing. Lauren twirls a drumstick in her fingers, grinning as she stretches her arms above her head. "We were fucking great" she states, beaming at the rest of you. Joanna, her keyboard perched precariously on its stand, nods in agreement, smirking widely while exclaiming, "Best we've sounded in weeks! I mean, 'Dark Roads' was especially tight today, right?". You chuckle and nod. Amy, still cradling her bass, smirks and throws a short glance at you, "Yeah, though I'm not sure Sam was entirely here for it" Her teasing tone pulls you out of your thoughts, and you glance up, blinking. "Huh? Uh, sorry" you mumble, rubbing the back of your neck, "Guess I'm just tired, hadn't had a good sleep last night". Your roomate shoots you a knowing look but doesn't say anything. Instead, she bounces to her feet, drumsticks still in hand, and claps you on the shoulder. "Well", she mumbles in a telling tone, "You better wake up, rockstar. We're not done yet". You freeze, your stomach dropping, knowing exactly what she's about to do as you whisper, "Lauren-". She cuts you off, turning to Joanna and Amy. "So, Sam's been holding out on us" Joanna raises an eyebrow, "Oh?". "Lauren, no" you groan, but she just grins wider. "She wrote a song", she announces, ignoring your protests, "I heard it earlier, and it's just great, guys. You have to hear it". Amy's eyes light up. "What? A song? Why didn't you tell us?". "Yeah", Joanna joins in, "How come we didn't know?". Your cheeks flush lightly."Because it's- it's not finished," you mumble quickly, but Lauren shakes her head. "It's practically there", she insists, "You've got to play it for them, Sam. Trust me".For a moment, you consider arguing. But the way they're all looking at you - curious, excited, expectant - makes you hesitate. Lauren's words from earlier echo in your mind. Don't hide it.

Finally, with a deep breath, you reach for your guitar. "Fine" you mutter, "but don't say I didn't warn you."

The room quiets as you adjust the strap and start strumming the opening chords. Your voice is shaky at first, but as the melody unfolds, you lose yourself in the song. While putting all your emotions into it, you fill the room with your voice, with the words and chords you brought to paper throughout the last weeks. After the last tone faded, you dare to look at them again. Joanna is the first to speak, her voice soft as she gives you a warm smile. "Sam... that was incredible". Amy nods, "That's a great fucking song, babe. You have to let us work on that". You chuckle embarrassedly and feel your face turning to a darker shade of pink. "See?", Lauren grins back at you, "Told you". "Oh, my god. Imagine us playing this one at the contest!", Joanna gasps, her eyes filled with excitement, "The crowd would love it". "Wait a second", you raise a brow, "Contest? What contest?". Lauren and you share a confused look. "Oh, yeah, almost forgot to tell you guys", Amy laughs and reaches into the backpocket of her jeans, "We just saw some of these laid out at a gas station". She unfolds a crumpled piece of paper, revealing a printed flyer. Lauren snatches the flyer first, scanning it quickly. "Battle of the Bands? In Indianapolis?", she asks, her tone rising with disbelief, "That's... that's only a few hours away!". Joanna leans in from the side, already grinning, "Been a while since we last went to one, mh"

You watch Lauren raising an eyebrow, looking over the flyer again. "Oh my god, 92.3 Rock FM is hosting this? That's like... a big deal". Amy watches Lauren's expression with a knowing look. "I know, right? That's like the radio station. And check out the prizes!" she urges, tapping the flyer, "First place is 2000$ cash, a gig at The Black Cat and a feature on Rock FM. A fucking feature on the radio!". Your eyes widen. This is completely insane. You lean over, squinting at the flyer as the information sinks in. "It's in 2 months", you point out, "You really think we can do this? I mean, I've never been to a contest with you guys. Have you ever played at such a big one?". Joanna shakes her head. "Nope. But we sure have the right confidence for it", she grins again, "We're great, Sam. We just have to get back on some stages, to get used to it again. Get you used to it. I mean, you're the perfect match for us, we haven't sounded that good in years. Trust me. You'll love it. Being on stage. It's... like sex. The best, breathtaking sex. On drugs". You chuckle at her words. "She's right. I mean, we've been rehearsing together for months now. We got this. And maybe we try adding a couple of new songs?", Amy suggestively wiggles her brows at you, causing you to sigh. "I don't know if this is a good idea". Your roommate jumps in to help you, "We'll think about it, okay? But nonetheless, we have some really great songs on hand already"

After a few seconds of silence, in which every single one of you dreams about the big stage you could be standing on, Joanna is the first one to speak again.

"So... are we signing up or what?"

30 minutes laterSome bar around the corner

"Oh, my god. Guys! I can't believe we actually signed up to participate. I'm so excited!", Joanna exclaims happily, and the remaining three of you widely smirk at her. You just sat down at a worn leather booth near the back of a bar only a couple of minutes away from Amy's garage. After signing up for the band battle, Lauren suggested you guys to head for some drinks to celebrate, and of course, you all agreed immediately. You never heard of this small bar before, but as long as the drinks are cold and the music's alright, you don't care.The dimly lit bar room buzzes with energy, the sound of chatter and clinking glasses blending seamlessly with the faint rock music playing on the speakers somewhere across the room as the waitress sets the frothy glasses of beer on the sticky table before you and leaves without even looking at you. Your eyes follow her for a moment. She's busy. The bar's well attended, although it's a Sunday evening. Almost every table is occupied, people of all age groups have gathered around them and having a drink, some of them peeking to the small stage located at the back of the bar, only a few feet away from your table, as if they wait for something to happen. Maybe there's a gig planned later tonight.

Joanna raising her glass draws your attention back to your friends. "To Cherry Burn", she declares with a mischievous grin, "and to kicking everyone's ass at the Battle of the Bands!". You chuckle and grab a beer. The cold glass presses against your fingers. "Cheers to that," Amy adds, lifting her glass herself. You and Lauren share a small glance, smirking at each other. "To Cherry Burn," you echo, and the glasses meet with a satisfying clink.

The conversation quickly turns to your planned setlist. Amy and Joanna are brainstorming like mad, tossing out song titles and debating which ones will get the best crowd reaction. Lauren keeps chiming in with sharp comments and suggestions, while smoking a cigarette. You sip your beer, laughing along, but your attention keeps wandering, scanning the room without thinking. The front door swings open again, and another group of younger folks steps in, chatting and laughing while looking around to find a spot to sit. You watch them for a moment, wondering if you know them from school or work since some of them seem quite familiar to you. You shake your head, grab your cigarettes and light yourself one, while forcing yourself to follow along with the conversation again, just as Lauren suggests you end your set with the new song you'd performed earlier. Three pairs of eyes land on you. You gulp lightly and take a puff from your cigarette, still unsure if you want such a big crowd to hear your song. "I'll... think about it, okay? I mean we surely have to work on it either way, before even being able to play it on a stage. Let's focus on that, first". They all slowly nod. "Yeah, makes sense", Amy says while nodding her head, "So, maybe pass me the lyrics so I can memorize them for next rehearsal, mh?". While throwing an unsure look at Lauren, you slowly blow out the smoke. I don't want her to sing this song, you tell her, just with your eyes. Your roommate understands and slowly leans forward, her beer still in her hand. "How about... Sam sings it herself?", she suggests, "I mean, it's such a personal topic, and I personally think she sounded great when singing it". Amy frowns her brows. "What, you want her to sing it? But, uhm, I'm the singer". "Yeah", Lauren chuckles lightly, "But it's her song, and I think she should sing it". Amy turns to glance at you, her eyes seeking your gaze. "I'm sure Sam doesn't wanna sing it on a stage, do you? I mean, did you ever sing in front of anybody?". You blush lightly and slowly shake your head. Without even waiting for your response, she turns back to Lauren and Joanna sitting across from you. "See? This won't work". "Ames", Joanna says softly, "This song needs the right feelings. Your dad loves you so much he allows us to play in his garage every week for years now. You're his babygirl. It just wouldn't fit if you'd sing it. That's all. No one wants to replace you, it's just for one song". You carefully glance at Amy, who's still frowning her brows and opens her mouth again. "But she-". "Nope", Joanna lifts her hand to stop her, "Don't. Whatever it is you're about to say, you don't really mean it. You're just upset. Let me stop you right there. If we perform it, Sam will sing. It's decided. Okay?". While taking another nervous drag, you watch Amy's face soften again. Eventually, she nods.

Before anyone can respond, Joanna suddenly changes the subject, her tone lightening. "So," she says casually, tilting her head, "what's everyone been up to this weekend? Anything wild or mention-worthy before tonight?"

With your hand still hovering above the ashtray to tab away the ashes of your cigarette, you freeze, the question landing like a bombshell. Lauren, oblivious, perks up instantly, her grin returning. "Oh, definitely," she chimes in, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. "You mean like Eddie catching Sam and Billy in our kitchen, basically mid-hookup in the middle of the night?" Well, shit. Both blink at her, startled. "Wait, what?", Joanna gasps, leaning forward. "It's nothing," you quickly chime in, but Lauren is already in full storytelling mode. "So, Eddie comes over - ""Wait. What was he doing there late at night?" Amy interrupts, her tone laced with curiosity. Lauren smirks cheekily, stumping out her cigarette butt and taking a slow sip to keep the tension that grew at your table. "I called him yesterday for some weed. He came over, I bought some, we talked a little. And, uh... we ended up having sex. Three times". She grins and takes another sip, not noticing how her words hit you like a slap. Three times? You clear your throat and take a deep drag. Joanna's jaw drops, and Amy just laughs and wiggles her brows. "Wait. What? I thought you two just go for some drunk hook-ups here and there", Joanna asks, causing Lauren to shrug while grinning. "What can I say? He's hot. And he knows how to make me very happy, trust me". Your face burns as the conversation spirals, their questions and laughter filling the air around you. As Lauren continues her casual recounting of her night with Eddie, you feel a storm brewing in your chest. The laughter and playful teasing from Joanna and Amy seem to echo louder than they should. You try to focus on anything else - the smoke curling from your cigarette, the condensation on your beer glass - but it's impossible to tune out Lauren's words. "Three times, huh?" Amy chuckles, leaning back in her seat with a smirk, "Damn, girl, you're on a roll."Joanna shakes her head in mock disbelief, "And here I thought I had a wild weekend. You're living the dream, babe". Your roommate just grins, clearly basking in the attention. "What can I say?", she chuckles, "He just couldn't get enough of me". You force a smile, nodding along as if the conversation isn't clawing at your nerves."

So" Joanna cuts in, her voice still light but probing, "back to the kitchen scene. Eddie catches you and Billy, huh? What was that about?". Her eyes meet yours, curios to her the story. Your heart stutters, and you glance at Lauren, hoping she'll just let it slide. But she's already halfway through lighting another cigarette, her eyes gleaming with amusement. "Oh, it was just a classic" she says, exhaling smoke with a dramatic flair, "We were in bed, I was sleeping already when I felt him getting back up to get some water. He went to the kitchen, and well. Didn't come back, so I got up to check on him. And guess what I found". She chuckles and throws an amused look at you, not realizing how uncomfortable she's making you. "These two lovebirds", she continues, "must've just came back from a party, totally hammered and horny for each other. They're both topless, she's sitting on the counter with a shirt pressed to her tits, Billy standing between her legs, and Eddie a few feet away, also just wearing some boxers, arguing with Billy. Trust me, the room was filled with testosterone. They almost threw hands". Amy bursts out laughing, while Joanna gasps, her hand flying to her mouth. "Oh, my God. What?". Blood rushes up to your face as you relive last night's situation once more. "Billy didn't even flinch", Lauren says, shaking her head, "That guy has nerves of steel. Eddie, though? He was pissed. Fucking pissed. I mean, yeah, he probably didn't expect anyone to be in the kitchen. And especially not you two"Joanna's eyes narrow as she glances at you. "Wait a second. Eddie didn't know Sam's your roommate?". "Nope". You stub out your cigarette with a shaky hand, your heart pounding. "Okay, can we not make a big deal out of this?" you say, trying to keep your voice steady. But Joanna isn't letting it go. She leans closer, her eyes glinting with curiosity. "Hold on. Sam, is there something going on with you and Eddie? I mean, why would he be pissed to see you and Billy together?" Your face heats up even more, and you shake your head vehemently. "No! Of course not. We just... argue a lot. And he's not a big fan of Billy, too. They don't get along". Amy snickers, taking a sip of her beer. "Argue, huh? That's what we're calling it these days?". You throw a panicking glance at Lauren, but she seems just as careless as ever. It doesn't even occur to her that you two have something going on between you. "Guys, seriously" you snap, feeling the walls closing in, "It was just a showoff between those two idiots. That's all". Lauren finally notices your discomfort and frowns slightly. "Hey, I didn't mean to embarrass you. It's just... a funny story, you know? No harm done. We've all been there". You force a weak smile, nodding. But deep down, you know there's harm. Because every word, every laugh, feels like another crack in the already fragile situation you're trying to navigate. As the others start to tell some stories where they've been caught in a similar situation, you try to calm down again. You barely listen to Joanna's story of how her ex's dad ran into them having sex in the family living room, Amy's and Lauren's laughter and gasps mixing with her words as she tells the whole embarrassing story. But you can't focus, now that the memories of last night came back to your mind. You don't want to think about him. You don't want to feel that stupid rush every time his face flashes across your mind. Yet, here you are, unable to escape the weight of last night, of this morning - the way his kiss has set off something in you that you don't know how to handle. You lean back in your seat, zoning out while sliding your fingertip up and down the cold, damp glass of your beer. Somewhere to your right, some lights are turned on, but you don't care. Then, out of the corner of your eye, you see something that catches your attention. Lauren's face is lighting up. It's subtle at first, just a flicker in her eyes, but it's enough to make your stomach twist in knots. You frown and glance over at her, confused, noticing how her eyes are fixed on something next to you. You follow her gaze and turn in your seat.

Oh, fuck no.

You freeze, a cold chill running down your spine when you realize what you're staring at. Or who.

On the small stage just a few feet away, Eddie and his band are setting up - plucking at their instruments, adjusting their mics with concentrated looks on their faces. Eddie's side is turned to you, his long hair falls into his face as he adjusts the strap of his guitar. "Lauren, what the fuck?" The words spill out of your mouth before you can stop them, a hiss of panic escaping you. Your eyes lock onto her, the realization crashing over you like a ton of bricks. "Is that why you asked us to come here? Because he's playing here tonight?"Lauren doesn't seem to notice your shift in mood at first. She's too busy grinning, practically vibrating with excitement as she watches Eddie and the band get ready. She's clearly smitten - completely oblivious to the storm brewing inside you. Her gaze is fixed on Eddie. Joanna and Amy share a confused look and glance over to the stage to understand what's going on. "Seriously?", you hiss again, trying to keep your voice down, but the frustration is already bubbling up. You didn't sign up for this. You didn't sign up for him.

The room is buzzing with anticipation, and the low murmur of conversation fades as the band suddenly grabs the attention of the crowd. Their lead singer, a lanky guy with wild hair and a laid-back demeanor, steps forward to the mic. He's wearing a leather jacket, and his grin is wide and cocky as he leans in. "Alright, alright!" He waves his hand, trying to get the crowd's attention, "What's up, Riverside?! We are Corroded Coffin, and we're here to rock the hell out of this place tonight!"The crowd erupts in cheers, and you can see Eddie smirk, leaning into his guitar. He adjusts his position, flicking his hair out of his face before glancing up at the audience.The lead singer grins, his eyes scanning the crowd before he continues, "We've got a killer set for you tonight, so grab a drink, and let's make some noise!" He exchanges a playful look with Eddie. "You know, this next one's gonna be loud. So, brace yourselves!" Then, he steps back and nods to Eddie, who's already strumming a few quick notes, warming up before they launch into their first song. The energy in the room shifts - tension building as the first chords of a heavy song begin to fill the air, shaking the walls. You watch the singer pull away from the mic and step to the side, giving Eddie a moment to take the spotlight with his raw, unfiltered guitar playing. It's loud. It's energetic. And the way Eddie moves with the music - it's magnetic. The crowd gets even more hyped. It's clear that, while the lead singer might be the face of the band for now, Eddie is the one everyone's paying attention to. His presence on stage is undeniable, and the connection between the music and the crowd is palpable. And as the song kicks off, you can barely tear your eyes away from him. The way his fingers move over the strings, the intensity in his eyes as he gets lost in the music - it's impossible to ignore. You find yourself watching him without meaning to, your heart in your throat.

And then, just like that, he looks up. His gaze sweeps over the crowd, and for a split second, it's like everything else in the room vanishes. The music fades into the background, the voices of the crowd blur into a low murmur, and all you can focus on is the way Eddie's dark eyes meet yours. It's instant. It's sharp. He stops. His fingers fumble on the strings, a wrong note ringing out in the pause. The mistake is barely noticeable, but you catch it. Those dark chocolate eyes don't leave yours, even as the crowd continues to cheer and the music picks back up. It's like he's drawn to you, like the rest of the world doesn't matter.Then it hits you. He's looking at you. Not Lauren, not the crowd. Just you.Your heart stutters in your chest, and a wave of heat floods your face. Your stomach churns. You feel exposed, like he can see every inch of your vulnerability. You quickly turn away, trying to hide the way your pulse is racing. But it's too late. You know that he knows you're there, that he's seen you. Lauren doesn't notice, of course. She's too busy staring up at him, her gaze glued to Eddie like he's the only thing that exists in the room. You want to scream, stand up and leave, but you can't. You're stuck. You never wanted this to happen. To see him again, like this. Or, at all. But now, Eddie is on stage, playing with more intensity, his eyes never leaving yours. You feel it - the pull, the connection. It's like something is tethering you to him, and no matter how much you try to fight it, it's pulling you back in. You want to look away, but you can't. You want to pretend like none of this matters, but it does.You try to breathe, to steady yourself, but your heart is pounding too hard. You know what happened last night. You know what happened this morning. You know what that kiss meant. But you also know this: you can't let anyone find out. Not Lauren. Not Billy. Not anyone.

As the song picks up, the band thrashes through the chorus, the music blaring so loud you can feel it in your bones. You force your eyes to stay on the stage, but every time you glance at Eddie, every time your eyes meet his, it feels like the world around you is falling apart. You hate that he's here. You hate that Lauren dragged you into this. But most of all, you hate how much his presence makes you nervous.

You managed to stay in your seat for a few songs now. Their set continues, and the people around you really seem to have a great time. The current song rages on, an electric fury in the air. Eddie's fingers fly over the strings, his whole body moving with the rhythm of the music, his hair flipping with every headbang. The crowd is eating it up, headbanging, cheering, and shouting. Lauren is in the same trance, completely captivated by him, her eyes fixed on Eddie, occasionally cheering loudly and throwing him another flirty, hungry look. She just can't tear her gaze away. This is very, very bad. You had no idea she's this much into him. Amy nudges Joanna, her voice rising above the music. "Looks like Lauren's got a serious thing for him" she says, her tone teasing as if she just read your thoughts. Joanna, who's been glancing at Lauren and Eddie, grins. "You think?", she jokes sarcastically, "I mean, she's fucking him with her eyes already" Lauren blushes, trying to act casual. "I am not, behave yourselves please", she mutters, though her eyes and a dirty smile betray her. Amy laughs and rolls her eyes. She leans back in her seat and winks at you. "You should probably prepare yourself for some loud sex next door tonight, Sammy. Maybe bring some earplugs". You force a wry smile, but it's tight. The last thing you want to talk about right now is Eddie and Lauren, and the sex they have. You feel suffocated in the booth, the conversation swirling around you, but your attention is too torn between the band on stage and the thoughts racing through your mind. You can't breathe. It's too much.

You watch Lauren as she smiles at Eddie and it breaks something in you. She's so obvious about it, and yet, she's completely unaware of how close you are to the edge, how close you are to losing it. The knot in your stomach tightens. You can't sit here anymore. You can't just stay and let this eat away at you. The tension in your chest is too much, your heart beating too fast, your thoughts too chaotic. "Excuse me", you suddenly mutter, more to yourself than anyone else. You push yourself up from the booth, ignoring the confused looks from your friends. You don't owe them an explanation. You need air. Now.

After making your way out of the crowded bar, the noise from the band still pounds in your ears as you step into the cool night. The moment the door swings shut behind you, the weight in your chest lightens just a little. You suck in a deep breath of the fresh night air, feeling the cold breeze against your skin as you rest your back against the brick wall of the bar, letting your eyes shut for a moment while hearing the music inside fading and another round of applause breaking out. You realize you left your jacket inside, and how the cold night air crawls through the thin fabric of your shirt. While suppressing a shiver, you push yourself away from the brick wall and decide to take a short walk to warm up, not noticing how there isn't another song starting in there. You sigh and walk around the corner of the small building, finding an almost empty parking lot filled with gravel. It crunches under your feet as you take a few steps along the side of the building, noticing Eddie's van parked at the other end of it, right next to a dimly lit back door. Just when you thought about going back inside, the sharp sound of the back door swinging open breaks through the night air, and you freeze. To your relief, it's just the singer who's stepping out, sipping on a bottle of water as he heads toward the van. He glances at you for a second, gives you a small smirk and opens the back door to grab something, before heading back inside. They must be on a short break. You relax again and take another few deep breaths, when the door opens again. This time, you're not that lucky.

Eddie steps out, his sweaty, disheveled hair falling into his eyes, a beer in one hand, the other holding a cigarette between his fingers. He takes a long drag, leaning against the hood of his van and exhaling the smoke slowly as his eyes land on you. He freezes too, clearly surprised to see you standing there, staring at him. You don't know why you're suddenly angry, but you are. You can feel the heat rising in your chest, a mixture of frustration and jealousy, a feeling that's been bubbling up ever since Lauren's excited giggles and over-the-top praise for Eddie earlier. His tall figure steps away from the car and comes closer. "What the hell are you doing here?", he asks, his voice low but with a hint of confusion. "How about you ask your little fangirl in there. She set me up and brought me here. I had no idea you're having a gig tonight". His dark brows furrow at your snappy words. "My what?". "Lauren. Your biggest fan, apparently". His eyebrow rises even higher, he's clearly confused. "What's that supposed to mean?" You scoff. "Oh, come on, Eddie. You know what I mean. Lauren's obviously got a thing for you. She drags me here, acting all coy and giggly, fucking you with her eyes while you're on that stage while telling me how great everything is between you". Eddie's expression shifts, a mix of confusion and something else flickering in his dark eyes. He takes another drag from his cigarette, the smoke curling around him, blending with the night air. The weight of your words hangs in the space between you two, heavy and sharp. For a moment, he doesn't say anything, just stares at you as if he's trying to understand the undercurrent in your voice. "So, why are you out here, all by yourself, mh?", he asks finally, the question slow and deliberate, "Because of Lauren?". You bite back a sarcastic laugh, unable to contain the bitterness that's been growing inside you. "What else would it be, huh? She's the one who dragged me here like I was supposed to be happy watching you and your band, listening to her gush about how amazing you are, how often you fucked her, how great you make her feel. I just needed a fucking break, that's all"His lips curl into a small smirk, but it doesn't quite reach his eyes. He steps closer, and you can feel the tension in the air thickening. The cool night breeze barely makes a dent against the warmth radiating off his skin from the heat of the performance. He takes another drag from his cigarette before flicking it away, stepping even closer. A mix of cologne and sweat tickles your nose. Something in his scent makes your mind all blurry. "You're acting like I owe you an apology", he mutters. "And I'm sure you're absolutely thrilled to be stuck in this situation, huh? Watching your friend lose her shit over me" You grit your teeth, fighting the urge to snap back. "You're pissed about that? About me and Lauren?" His voice is low, a dangerous edge to it now. "Well, maybe you should take a long, hard look at yourself and figure out if you're any better." He takes another step toward you, the distance between you shrinking until you can almost feel the heat of his skin. "Aren't you doing the same damn thing with Billy? While I have to watch?". You gulp and glance up at his face. He's way too close now, his warm body only inches away from yours. You can feel his heat on your cold skin while watching a small smirk grow on his lips when he notices how speechless you are. He lets out a dark chuckle, the sound almost mocking, and leans in just a little closer, forcing you to tilt your head back to keep eye contact. "You're a fucking hypocrite, Sam", he mutters, his breath hot against your face. "You're just as bad, aren't you?" You swallow hard, trying to shake off the feeling of vulnerability that's rising in your chest while staring into his dark eyes.The distance between you is almost nonexistent now. You can feel his breath on your skin, and your body is betraying you, craving the closeness even as your mind tells you to stay away. You wish you could just walk away, but your legs feel like lead."Tell me, did you end things with Billy yet?" he asks, his eyes lock onto yours, intense, unwavering, "Or are you still fucking him too? Just like me and Lauren, huh?" The question hits you like a punch to the gut. You don't want to answer, but you can't lie to him - not when he's looking at you like that. The tension between you both is electric, crackling in the air like it could explode at any second. You try to look away, but your gaze is drawn back to him. His eyes darken. "I see it in your eyes", he murmurs, causing a knot in your stomach to tighten, and you hate that he's right. You want to argue, to tell him he's wrong, but you can't find the words. You want to push him away, but your hands won't listen to your brain. You swallow, your breath hitching in your throat, trying to steady yourself. But Eddie doesn't give you a chance. Without warning, he reaches out and places his hand on your arm, his touch firm, but not forceful. The heat from his hand sends a jolt through you, and your skin prickles under his touch. "You're jealous, aren't you?" he mumbles, his voice low and almost teasing. Dark eyes flicker between yours, daring you to admit it. Finally, you gain your speech back. "I'm not", you whisper back, causing him to chuckle again. "You feel just like I did when I saw you with him last night". You shake your head and take a step back, wincing at the feeling of a cold brick wall suddenly pressing against your back. "Bullshit", you say while looking away from him. Within the split of a second, he closes the gap between you. "You're so fucking predictable" he murmurs, "I can see it in your eyes. You're jealous. Don't even try to hide it from me". Your breath hitches again as your back presses against the brick wall once more, but he doesn't stop moving, his lips curving into a smug, knowing smile. "You think I didn't notice you watching me?" He leans in just a little bit closer, his lips almost brushing your ear as he speaks, the warmth of his voice sending a jolt through your body. "I could feel your eyes on me the whole damn time. And now here you are, out here in the cold, pretending it doesn't affect you." A rush of heat floods your chest, and it's not from the cold air or the alcohol you've had. It's the way his words cut into you, exposing every feeling you've tried to bury. The way his body presses against yours, the way his scent invades your senses, it all feels too much and yet not enough. "You're just like me", Eddie mumbles darkly, "You can't stop it, can you? You're jealous. You can't stand it, knowing what I do to her. Just like I can't stand seeing him all over you, Sam"His breath hits your skin, dark eyes locked on yours like he's studying every inch of you. Then, his hand moves to the side of your neck, his thumb brushing over your jaw, the touch gentle but possessive. "You feel this", he whispers softly, "This heat. This pull between us. You can't ignore it, no matter how hard you try."

You gulp hard and stare back up at his eyes, only managing to bring out a pressed "Fuck you, Eddie"

Eddie's smirk widens, and he leans in closer, his lips just a hair's breadth from yours, his breath mixing with yours in the cool night air. His gaze is intense, his eyes dark with something you can't quite name, but it's a look that makes your skin flush and your pulse race. "Is that all you've got?" he murmurs as his hand slides lower, grazing over the curve of your neck. He knows exactly what he's doing.You're on the edge of losing control, fighting against the pull, but it's getting harder and harder to resist. You want to push him away, to snap at him, but all you can do is stand there, your body betraying you as your breath hitches again, your chest tightening with both frustration and desire. "Don't pretend like you don't feel it," he continues, almost growling, "You're pissed off, jealous as hell, but you're just as fucked up as I am. You want this, Sam. You want me" The heat from his body is pressing against yours like a magnet. You can feel the hard lines of his chest, his breath mixing with yours, and the weight of everything hanging between you two threatens to break through. His thumb brushes over your lips, and you can't help but shiver at the light touch."You want me just as much as I want you" he breathes, his lips so close to yours now that you can taste the heat on your tongue.

It all happens too fast for you to understand. With a small movement, you close the gap between your lips, pressing against his in a kiss that's desperate, hot, and full of everything you've tried to deny. The taste of him floods your senses, and in an instant, you can feel everything shift. It's all fire, all need, and the world around you disappears. Eddie groans softly, his hand falls on the back of your neck as he pulls you into him, kissing you back just as passionate and making your heart race. You're stepping on your toes, feeling his stubbly beard scratch your chin while tilting your head a little. Your hands fall on his warm chest, grabbing his t-shirt while feeling his tongue gently tickling yours as your kiss deepens. Everything around you fades. There's only the heat between you, the pressure of his hands, the wild rush of feelings flooding your senses. Your body presses into his, every inch of you desperate for more, hungry for more of him. But just as you start to lose yourself in it - his hand tracing the line of your jaw, his lips moving against yours, the air between you thick with desire - you're abruptly pulled back to reality. A voice calls out from behind you, sharp and insistent. "Eddie! Come on, man, break's over" You feel him tense for a moment, his lips pulling away just enough for him to glance over his shoulder. "One sec", he shouts, before turning back to you. Shyly, you glance around him, afraid anyone might have seen you, but whoever called him went back inside. No one's in sight. His eyes meet yours, dark and intense, still heavy with that same unspoken hunger, but there's a flicker of frustration in his gaze. He gives you a quick, breathless look, as if silently apologizing before he straightens up, stepping away reluctantly. He meets your gaze one last time before he starts to walk back, leaving you standing there, breathless, pulse racing, trying to catch your breath as the lingering warmth of his touch fades, leaving you craving more.

Moments later, the music starts back up again, loud and throbbing in the night air, but it's different now. There's a certain edge to it, something sharp, like the entire room is vibrating with the intensity that just passed between you two. You sigh shakily, suddenly feeling the cold air again and pushing yourself away from the wall to head back inside. While slowly walking around the building and back up to the front door, you can still feel his touch on your lips.

What have I done? FUCK, why did I do this?