Chapter 15

XV. Everything

"CHERYL." A voice called out accompanied by a gentle shake on my shoulder, trying to snap me back to reality. I sucked in a breath and opened my groggy eyes, the sight of Piers sleeping soundly on the bed was the first thing I saw. I shifted from my position, every muscle protested with the action. I felt the painful soreness of my joints for being still in an uncomfortable position for hours.

"Cheryl."

I blinked away the rest of sleep in my system, but some still remained. With a blurry vision, I looked up to see Lorraine looking down upon me, a gentle smile decorating her soft, delicate features.

"You should go back to the apartment so you can take a shower and change." She said, giving my shoulder a squeeze. I tore my gaze away from her and shifted them back to Piers, listening to the continuous beeping sound of a monitor, reminding me why we were here. My fists clenched on my lap, seized by the fear of leaving him.

"I want to stay with him." I whispered, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest, and I took it as a sign that he is still okay, that he wouldn't leave me any time soon.

Lorraine nodded, and then her soft hand enveloped on my clenched one, "I know you do, but he's going to need a lot of time to rest. I'll look after him while you're gone. Phyllis and Garrett will come by later, too. You can come back when you're fully rested." She muttered, careful not to wake Piers up. "He's going to be okay."

I heaved out a deep sigh then massaged the bridge of my nose, feeling the ache in my head due to deprivation of sleep. I was too tired to even argue, and I'm sure that Piers wouldn't like it either.

"Alright." I said then stood up, fighting the urge to wince at the pain in my joints.

Lorraine smiled, "Come on, let's go before we wake him." She put her arm around my shoulders and guided me out of the hospital.

She drove me back to the apartment, which I objected for a while as I already know how to drive. She insisted, saying that I was too tired to even attempt to drive. On the way back to the apartment, she kept on telling me how I was as stubborn as my mother.

"You're so much like your mother." She said, smiling at me as she sees her best friend in my form. I just smiled as I continue eating my breakfast.

"Do you miss her?" I asked her, which made her smile morph into a somber one, and I immediately regret ever asking her that question.

"Sometimes..." Lorraine answered after a while, "She's like the sister I never had. She was always there for me whenever I need her, always there to make me laugh even when I'm close to tears." She looked at me, that same sad smile still intact. "I was devastated when I learned that she passed away. I couldn't do anything to help her, Cheryl. But I'm going to do my best to help you."

Lorraine left after making sure that I was going to be fine. When the stillness in the air greeted me, I suddenly realized how foreign the solitude is to me anymore. The more I look at the empty spaces between everything, the more it looked very similar to the labs and the high security ward that I've been kept in the dark for three years. I shook my head in an attempt to brush off the ghostly memories, that phase in my life is long over and I don't plan on playing the victim anymore.

I took a shower and a nap in my room. I woke up after four hours, lunch time, and I figured that Piers would have been eating his lunch by now. Even with that thought in mind, I still prepared some ham and cheese sandwiches, and wasted no time in prepping to return in the hospital. I informed Lorraine beforehand that I will be arriving in a few minutes.

I pulled into the hospital parking lot, the scent of ham and cheese filled the car. I sighed then got out of the car, the cold breeze swept inside me. I looked up at the gloomy sky, the dark clouds covering the sun. I shut the door then made my way toward the hospital entrance.

The sound of the television accompanied by the hushed voices of people were the first thing I heard upon my entrance at the waiting room. All of the seats were occupied with the people's heads bent down to their own devices, but I had noticed one person that stood out among the crowd.

"Phyllis?" I called when I spotted her, and she immediately whipped her head at me as if she was expecting me. "What are you doing here in the waiting area?"

Phyllis stood up, slipping her hands on her jacket. "Nothing. I just wanted to step out for a bit because I got bored. He was asleep when I arrived a few hours ago." She said nonchalantly, then we passed by and went to the elevators. I looked at the dim numbers, trying to contain the impatience that suddenly bounced through me. As we were waiting for the elevator to lead us to our designated floor, Phyllis spoke again. "By the way, the doctors said that Piers is doing good, and should be good to be discharged within this week."

My shoulders relaxed at the newly gained information. I nodded in acknowledgement and she let out a relieved smile, and there I noticed the exhaustion in her features. When the elevator dinged, we pushed through the crowd of people and turned left in the silent hallway. I stopped in front of his door and opened it, Phyllis right behind me. My face instantly brightened at the sight of him, which Piers mirrored upon seeing me.

Phyllis crossed her arms across her chest with a smile crossing her features, "Finally! Sleeping Beauty is awake." She teased as she plopped right at the foot of the bed. Piers let out a weak chuckle, his gaze never leaving mine. I sauntered around the room and took a seat on the chair I occupied this morning.

"Seriously, Piers, I'm disappointed in you." Phyllis jokingly shook her head, a grin still intact on her face. "A gunshot wound on the shoulder isn't all too bad, you know. I thought you were made of steel like you always bragged. See that it doesn't happen again. You're a member of the freaking BSAA, bullets don't even faze them."

Piers rolled his eyes, and I let out an amused giggle which made his attention snap back to me.

"That won't faze me." He said, a small smirk decorating his lips, and it was my turn to roll my eyes at him.

"I brought you some sandwiches." I said as I pulled out the container of ham and cheese sandwiches from my bag and handed them to him.

"Can I have some, too?" Phyllis interjected.

"No." Piers and I said in unison, which made her pout once again.

"What a perfect match." She said with a voice full of sarcasm.

"What were you watching?" I asked Piers, ignoring his cousin's remark. Piers glanced at the muted television, as if suddenly remembering its existence.

"Nothing in particular," He said, "It was mainly just for distraction."

"Are they seriously just going to ignore me?" Phyllis said to herself.

"How are you feeling?" I'd always find myself ask every chance I get.

"Still sore, but I'm on a lot of heavy painkillers so it's not so bad."

The conversation shifted from one place to another, from discussing what the doctors had said to how their day went. The beeping sound of the heart monitor was the background noise to our voices, also a constant reminder of why we were here in the first place. About halfway into the conversation, Phyllis fell asleep on the foot of the bed due to exhaustion, and I leaned over to drape a blanket over her body, Piers watching me do so.

"You need to get a decent sleep, too." He told me.

"I'm okay. I already took a nap back at the apartment." I said as I adjust the seams of fabric on the bed, then looked over at him with a smile but slightly faltered when I noticed him looking at me with a somber expression. "Is there something wrong? Does your shoulder hurt?" I asked him, worry laced every syllable.

Piers shook his head with a small smile, his free hand went to intertwine our fingers. I suddenly missed the feeling of his warm, callous hands enveloping mine, but what seemed like the warmth I was always seeking was my own this time. His hand is cold...

"I love it..." I said softly with a smile, bringing his cold hand to my flushed face, "when you smile and look at me. But... why do I sense sadness in your eyes?"

"I'm not sad," He denied, "In fact, I'm happy that you're here." He tried to smile to build up a façade of his true feelings.

"Piers... please let me hear your thoughts. Please?"

Piers looked away, then heaved a deep sigh. He shook his head as he looked back at me, "I'm sorry, Cheryl. But I just don't think that this is fair." His hand slowly dropped that was on my face, as if strength was leaving his body. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion.

"Piers?"

"I... just feel bad whenever I'd have to leave for my missions. I know you don't like it when I leave because you'd worry. And I hate it when I make you worry."

I looked away, "Itʼs not your fault..."

"And then this happens," He sighed, "I can't promise you that this would be the last time because we both know that as long as I'm in the service, this is bound to happen."

"There are some things that are out of our control," I explained to him, "Please don't worry about me. It's only natural for me to worry about you, but then you'd always come back, right? You can leave me all you want. You can leave me because I can take it. But I won't go anywhere. I will stay where you left me. I'll always stay with you." I tried to give him a smile despite the tears that was starting to brim my eyes, I squeezed his hand. "And I'm proud of you, you know. So proud. The world might forget what you did for it, Piers, but... but I wouldn't. I'll never forget what you made me feel."

Piers smiled as if he was moved by my words, and I knew right then that he was convinced. Seeing his smile after all of what we've been through would make me tell myself that staying where he left me was all worth it, that he is still okay. He doesn't need to know how my whole world would shatter when the day comes when he doesn't come back. But knowing that he was one of the best and his team would have his back at all times somehow puts my fears at bay.

"I'm glad, that at the end of everything, I have you to come back home to." I just smiled, then he placed something on my palm. I looked over then saw a locket with a heart-shaped pendant. I looked back at him, "It's sort of my Christmas gift to you. You can put my picture in there so you wouldn't miss me that much." He smirked a little. I snorted with an eye roll but then smiled right after. I opened the locket, seeing two vacant spaces where I'm supposed to put his photograph.

"Thank you."

From then on, I'd always worn the locket at all times. When Piers was discharged from the hospital that same week, his parents convinced him to spend Christmas back home, as they could use his time of recovery to spend the annual holiday with his family. It was by far the best Christmas that we had shared as it was also the first time that I had seen their family complete. Piers would sometimes slip in to work on some paperwork and read e-mails to get updates about the activities of the BSAA in the remainder of his one month leave.

By February 2012, Piers had fully recovered from his injury and was ready to go back to the service. Just then, as if on cue, they received some intel about suspicious activities circulating around a certain prestigious school in Singapore. Chris' team was deployed to investigate the said area.

After that talk with Piers back at the hospital, it feels as though I have lifted some heavy weights on my chest, but I don't understand why somehow there's still more, as if I was still worried about something I don't know about. I was snapped out of my pool of thoughts when I heard the sound of the gun cocking, Phyllis dismantling the pieces. She and I have been training on our own since then. When we have mastered the concept of mixed martial arts, we are now focusing on firing and assembling various types of guns. Her father was more than fine with teaching us the basic rules and giving us a few survival tips.

"Do you want to become a soldier, too?" I'd ask her once.

"Yes, but I also want to become a doctor," She told me, chuckling to herself as she fired her gun on the dummy, solidly hitting on the chest which was a bulls-eye.

I leaned against the wall, adjusting my earmuffs. "You can do both, though. You can become a medic in your team."

"Maybe."

"Have you found a university for college?"

She stopped firing, looking at me through her protective glasses, "Actually, I have. It's a few hours away from here."

I nodded, "That's good then."

Everything seems to go on a fast pace. The BSAA seem to manage the situation in Singapore, but there are a lot of things sacrificed, a lot of people. I could only guess that a new virus was being developed once again, and that school was used as the testing ground for its potency. When will this violence end, I wonder...

I stood in front of the apartment door and took out my spare keys on the door. After hearing a click on the door, indicating that it was already unlocked, I pushed myself in and closed the door behind me. I wriggled out of my thick coat and set it aside on the hanger, "I'm home!" I called out as I took off my shoes. I received no response, and I instantly knew what he could be doing at the moment.

I checked for the gym, and there I saw him lifting. I exhaled a breath, crossing my arms across my chest. This man just doesn't take a break, does he? Even if he just arrived from the arduous mission in Singapore just a few days ago, here he was, working out to stay in shape. I held the locket close to my chest, and as if on cue, his gaze shifted to me. Piers flashed me his boyish smile as he put the weights down, and I went over to him to wrap my arms around him but he backed away.

"Hey, don't," He said, chuckling, "I'm full of sweat."

I raised an eyebrow, letting out a smile of my own. "I can see that. But do you think that I care?"

He shook his head at me, the virile smile still intact. Getting the affirmation, his hands made its way to my waist and pulled me close to him, closing the insignificant space between us. Even with all of the sweat, he still smelled musky-spicy and manly. The warmth of his touch seem to go through the thin material I was wearing, and there I knew that we were finally home again.

"Fancy seeing you here." I said, as my arms went to wrap it around his neck. I played with the wet thin hair of his nape, looking intently into his bright hazel eyes.

"Fancy seeing you here." He replied. "Du bist sehr schön."

I cocked an eyebrow as I let out a short laugh, "Well, well, you actually remember what I taught you, huh? You're getting good at sweet talks. What do you want this time?"

Piers laughed, too, and it feels very refreshing to hear him laugh after everything that's happened, "Can you make steak for dinner?"

I agreed, then just found myself preparing steak for our dinner. I stood against the counter, dicing the tomatoes as I listen to the running water in the bathroom. Piers was taking a quick shower after the work out. When I was finished with the tomatoes, the kitchen timer went off and I moved to pull out the freshly baked potatoes. While I was busy preparing the salad, Piers walked in the kitchen to grab something from the refrigerator. But one thing that caught me off guard was the fact that he's shirtless, his toned body in all of its glory for me to admire.

"Are you trying to seduce me?" I asked with an amused smile, narrowing my eyes at him.

"Why? Is it working?" He said with a mischievous tone. I shook my head slowly, my smile stretching. He trudged around me and sat on the counter right beside me. I turned my attention back to the task at hand, proceeding to season the steaks. Then I heard Piers' amused chuckle, making my gaze turn to him.

"What is it?"

But instead of answering my question, he just pulled me by the arm and kissed me. My eyes widened for a moment in surprise, but when his chapped lips moved against mine, I was lost in a trance once again. His hands tightened around my waist, burning my skin and my fingers brushed against his damp hair. This isn't the first time we kissed, but everything we do always feels like the first time. Now I'm all addicted to everything he makes me feel. He's my... everything.

When he got enough of my lips, his kisses travelled to my jaw, then to my neck. "I love you..." He whispered as he planted tender kisses on my sensitive flesh, making me lose my mind. "I love you so much..." I let out a whimper as his lips went to my bosom, the tiny hairs on my skin rising. What is he doing to me? It's driving me crazy... I don't know why but somehow I want more...

"Piers..." I whimpered, my voice pleading. My lips parted in anticipation... anticipation for something I don't know. Then his lips went back to mine, silencing me.

I was too drowned in the sensation to even notice that he was slowly undressing me, or the way that he picked me up and carried me back to his room, or even care about anything else.

He's my everything. Without him, tomorrow wouldn't be worth waiting and yesterday wouldn't be worth remembering.