Chapter 24 - 미안해요 (MI-AN-HAE-YO)[Sorry]

I wake up in the middle of the night when I felt the side of my mattress shift slightly with the sudden addition of weight. My eyes move against my eyelids before I forced them open out of curiosity. I shifted myself to turn on my side to meet face to face with a red shirt.

"Jimin-oppa?"I ask, poking the fabric to hear a small laugh that vibrated against my own chest."What time is it?"

"Sorry, I woke you. We still have a few hours until we'll need to get up."he apologizes, hugging my shoulders so I could be squished against his chest."I was freezing on my bed."

"That's what you get for choosing the bed closest to the air vent."I smirk."You're really warm though."

"That's because I'm hugging you."Jimin says, resting his chin on the top of my head."You're the one who's warm."

"If you say so."I shrug, wrapping my left hand around his waist, right below his own arm.

I accept his snuggles and decide to rest my head in the crook of his neck, it felt so warm against my cheek. Jimin sighed and I felt his left hand play with an end of my hair.

"Hey, Roxi?"

"Mhm?"

"What do you think of me as?"

I tilted my chin up so I could see his face. He seemed...troubled. Jimin wouldn't meet my eyes while I took his cheek so he could face me.

"What do you mean?"I ask, a bit confused with the vague question.

"...Do you have feelings for me?"he asked, clarifying his question slightly.

"Of course, you're a really good friend of mine. And I only hug people I trust."I smile, making his lips twinge upward a bit with my response.

"Really? That really means a lot. To be honest, I've never opened up to a girl as much as I did with you."his expression darkens a bit and he centers his eyes to the top of my head."Whenever I talk about my personal life they start getting bored and then they switch the conversation to my looks."

"That really sucks...the guys I knew were usually only into me for my looks too. Like back in America, whenever someone confessed to me in high school or junior high, I would turn them down before even getting to know them..."

"Now why would you do that? You should at least be friends with them first."he says, finally meeting my eyes with a brotherly smile."You know people deserve to have a chance. Maybe not a second chance, but a chance."

"I know but...I was scared."I admit."Yeah, me the girl who can defend herself from men with guns, is scared of plain old love. Just thinking about depending on someone...well...it kinda scares me. Everyone I've depended on is...out of my reach right now. And to be honest, loneliness doesn't get any better...I just never experienced anything besides that for the longest time..."

Silence fills the hotel room as I listen to the soft muttering of voices from rooms nearby, as well as bustling cars; their tires grinding against the asphalt to create a vibration of sound my way. It must have only been a few seconds, but with the closeness it felt like an eternity until Jimin pulled back. He released me from his hold for only a mere moment before scootching a bit lower on the bed so instead of me facing his chest, I was met with his dark brown eyes. The room seemed to get darker and darker the more I looked at him, even his expressions began to fade as I focused on nothing but his shining orbs.

"Please don't say that."he whispered deeply."Please don't..."

"But, it's true..."I reply, snapping out of the close connection by turning my head."I mean, I know there are people out there who love me, but they don't love me for me."

"So you think everyone loves you for your looks?"

"...Yes, to be honest. Double standards, keeping up with everyone's wishes is just so stressful."

"What about me then?"Jimin asks, turning my chin so I could face his gaze head on once more."Do you think I only like you for your looks?"

"...No?"I mumble, trying to wrap my head around what he was implying.

"Roxi look, I know you might get this a lot. But, I'll tell it to you truthfully. Because you deserve to hear the truth. You ready?"he continues once I nod my head."I think you are beautiful. Inside and out. You're selfless, caring, sweet, smart...cute...I mean- I don't only love you for your looks. I do love you for you, and if anyone thinks otherwise then just remember they aren't anywhere near as perfect as you are."

Jimin smiles, and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. I return his bright smile with one of my own and cling onto him tighter. He sighs and pulls the blanket over my shoulder.

"Sorry I woke you."he says, releasing me from his hold."Get some sleep."

"You need to sleep more too."I pout, laying my head on his shoulder."You're going to perform two songs while I do one."

"Still, your choreography is really intense."Jimin says back."I mean...you're really different on stage..."

"What do you mean?"I ask, tilting my head to look at the electronic alarm clock on the side table.

'Three more hours.'

"You...seem so...I don't want to use the wrong word."he chuckles, covering his face."...Is there a better synonym for sexy than 'hot'?"

I blush brightly and shove my face into my pillow."I'm not that different!"

"You're so cute in real life then on stage you're...Fierce! Yeah, that's the right word."he corrects, patting my back."That's a good thing!"

"Fine, sure."I say, rolling onto my back so I faced the ceiling."I'll take that as a compliment then."

"Good."

After an hour of laying on the bed, I decided it was time to get ready for the day. I shuffled out of the covers to let Jimin sleep in peace while I took some clothes from my bag and went to the bathroom to change. I put on a black curved fit v-neck sweater with white kanji spelling out 'Smile', tight blue ripped jeans, and my burgundy high-heeled combat boots before going to the couch and looking through my phone.

I

responded to all their texts positively and walked over to Jimin. He was rustling in his sleep until I softly shook him awake.

"Yoongi-oppa wants to remind you to wear a jacket. We still have about an hour before we should get to the bus for breakfast."I remind."I think I'll be wandering for a bit before that."

"Okay, I'll see you there."Jimin groans, stretching while I took my black backpack and put in my room card, phone, wallet, makeup, and glasses.

"See ya later Jimin-oppa!"I say as I closed the door.

For the first night of this trip, it actually wasn't so bad.