87 "trapping"

The field stretched wide and golden in front of us. The kind of open land that made everything feel smaller—problems, people, even pain. The herd moved slow today, drifting like a single living thing across the grass, their hooves stirring up dust that caught in the sunlight.

Patsy sat in my lap, her little body tucked carefully against me so her arm stayed supported.

"Why do they all walk together like that?" she asked, pointing with her good hand.I brushed her hair back gently."Because they feel safer that way," I said. "When they stay close, nothing can sneak up on them easy."She watched them closely."Like a family?"I nodded "Yeah, baby. Like a family."

The wind rolled through the field, warm and steady, lifting strands of my hair and carrying the soft sounds of the ranch with it—boots, horses, distant voices.Patsy leaned back against me. "Why do the cowboys follow them?" I pointed out toward the far side of the herd."See how they spread out?" I said. "They're not chasing them. They're guiding them. Keeping them from going places they shouldn't."Her eyes tracked where I pointed."That's Daddy!" she said proudly.Walker sat tall on his horse, moving easy like he and the animal were the same thing. He guided the edge of the herd with small movements, calm and steady."Yeah," I said softly. "That's your daddy."

"Man ain't he handsome!" He smiled. I laughed softly "he sure is" We sat there for a while, just watching. Then the wind shifted.And with it—voices.The boys. Loud. Teasing. Carrying across the field like they always did."Look at him!" Ryan's voice called out. "Man's sleepin' in the big house now!"A few laughs followed."Yeah," Colby added, "Walker went from bunkhouse to suburban real quick!"Patsy looked up at me."What's suburban?" I smiled faintly."Just means... living comfortable."She nodded like she understood.Out in the field, Walker shook his head, a grin tugging at his mouth. "Ain't nothin' comfortable about it," he called back. More laughter. "Oh yeah?" Ryan shot back. "You got a woman, a kid, and a roof that don't leak. Sounds real rough, cowboy!"Colby chimed in, "Man traded in hot nights with sexy chicks for bedtime stories!"I felt something small twist in my chest. Patsy kept talking, unaware. "Why do they yell so much?" "They like hearing themselves," I said absently.Out there, Walker leaned forward on his saddle. "You boys think sleepin' in a bunkhouse full of snorin' men is better than sleepin with a cute blonde?" he fired back.

"Damn right!" Colby laughed. "At least we ain't tied down!"Ryan added, "Yeah, you used to have options, Walker! Now you got diapers and dishes!"

The men laughed again. I kept my eyes on the herd, but my ears stayed locked on him.Walker tipped his hat back slightly."Yeah," he said, dragging it out just enough. "Real tragedy." Something in his tone made me listen closer. "Man sounds miserable," Colby teased.

Walker shrugged. "Worst thing that ever happened to me," he said.

The words hit sharper than I expected.Even knowing the tone. Even knowing the crowd. Patsy shifted in my lap."Why do the baby cows stay close to their moms?" she asked.

I swallowed. "Because they trust them, mamas are the only ones they know" I said quietly.

Out in the field, Ryan whistled."So what about this baby mama of yours, huh?"

My breath slowed. "Yeah," Colby added. "She worth all that settlin' down? At least good in the sack?" I stared straight ahead, heart thudding a little harder now.

Walker adjusted in his saddle.For a second, he didn't answer.Then— "Yeah," he said simply.The teasing didn't stop. "Oh come on," Ryan pushed. "She that good?"

Walker let out a low whistle. "She's somethin' else." Heat crept up my neck despite the breeze.Patsy pointed again. "Why is that one cow running?""Maybe Because she thinks she found a better way," I said, forcing my voice steady. "But she'll come back."

Out in the field—

Ryan laughed. "You mean you've been gettin' lucky?"

Colby snorted. "You idiot, he's got a kid."

"Don't mean nothin'," Ryan shot back. "Man could be sufferin' now."

A pause.

Then—

"Sex good or what?" Ryan called out.My fingers tightened slightly around Patsy.I kept my eyes on the herd. Kept my voice soft."See how they don't let one wander too far?" I said. "They always bring each other back."

Behind us, the wind carried Walker's answer.Calm. Certain.

"Ain't complainin'."

The boys erupted. Ryan hollered, "That's all we get?!"Walker laughed. Then added, a little louder this time—"Blonde's got me just fine."

My heart stuttered.Ryan whooped. "Do blondes have more fun or what?"Walker didn't hesitate. He tipped his hat forward with a crooked grin. "Yeah," he said. "They do." The wind carried the laughter away across the field. But the tightness in my chest eased. Just a little.Patsy leaned back into me again.

"Mama?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"Are you happy?"

The question caught me off guard.I looked out at Walker.At the way he moved.At the way he stayed.At the way he chose us—every day.I pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

"Yeah," I said softly.

" I am."

....

The smell of grilled meat carried across the ranch, thick and rich, mixing with smoke and dust and laughter.Gator had taken over the pit like it was his kingdom, flipping slabs of meat with a kind of pride that made the cowboys hover close, plates in hand, waiting their turn like a pack of hungry dogs.

Voices echoed. Boots scraped.

Someone laughed too loud at something that probably wasn't that funny.

It felt... normal.

Too normal.

Patsy sat cross-legged on the ground beside Lloyd, her cast propped carefully in her lap while she tore into a piece of meat like she hadn't eaten in days.

"Slow down there, darlin'," Lloyd chuckled. "Ain't nobody stealin' it from ya."

"She eats like her daddy," someone called out.Walker shot back, "Then she eats right."More laughter.I smiled faintly from a distance.

But I didn't join them.

Instead, I stood out in the open field just beyond the noise, arms wrapped around myself as the wind moved through me—through my hair, through my clothes, through everything that still felt unsettled inside my chest.

I closed my eyes.

Let the sun hit my face.

Let the warmth sink in.

For a second... I felt still.

Then—

Arms wrapped around my waist from behind.

Warm. Familiar.

Walker.

He didn't say anything at first. Just pulled me into him, his chest against my back, his lips brushing softly along my shoulder... then the back of my neck.

A slow, grounding kind of touch.

"You gonna stand out here all night?" he murmured.

I exhaled quietly.

"Maybe."

He hummed, tightening his hold just a little. "Food's good."

"I know."

"Then why you hidin' out here?"

I didn't answer right away.

The wind picked up, pushing my hair to one side, exposing my face to him.

That's when I said it.

"Am I trapping you?"

He stilled.

Not completely—but enough that I felt it.

"What?" he asked quietly.

I turned slightly in his arms, just enough to look at him over my shoulder.

"Am I keeping you from... what you'd rather be doing?"

His brow furrowed.

"Where the hell is that comin' from?"

I shrugged, looking away.

"You heard them," I said. "The guys. The bunkhouse. The bars. The girls."

He let out a slow breath.

"Willie..."

"Just answer me," I pressed softly. "Are you here because you want to be... or because you feel like you have to be?"

His hands slid from my waist to my hips, turning me fully to face him.

"Look at me," he said.

I hesitated—but I did.

His eyes were steady. Firm.

"Ain't a single part of me here by accident," he said.

I searched his face.

"Not even a little?"

"Not even a damn inch."

The wind moved between us.

I swallowed.

"Are you bored?"

That caught him off guard.

"Bored?"

"With me," I clarified. "With this. With... us."

His expression shifted—confused first... then almost amused.

"Are you serious right now?"

I crossed my arms tighter.

"You used to have a different life."

"And?"

"And I'm not... that," I said quietly. "I'm not some girl at a bar. I don't—" I hesitated, then forced it out, "—I'm probably not even that good in bed compared to what you're used to."

For half a second—He just stared at me. Then he let out a short, incredulous laugh.

"Jesus, woman..."

I stiffened slightly. "Don't laugh."

"I ain't laughin' at you," he said, shaking his head. "I'm laughin' because that might be the most ridiculous thing you've ever said."

My jaw tightened. "I'm serious."

"So am I," he shot back. "You think I'm sittin' around missin' bar girls?"I didn't answer. He stepped closer, lowering his voice. "You think I want loose ska my bar whores over this?"

"I don't know," I admitted. His hand came up, brushing my hair back gently. "You're hotter than a pepper," he said plainly. I blinked. "That's your argument?""It's a good one," he smirked.Despite myself, I huffed a small laugh.But it didn't last. I looked down."If you ever feel trapped..." I said quietly, "I need you to tell me."His expression softened. "I ain't goin' nowhere."

"That's not the same thing," I said. "Don't stay if you're unhappy. Don't stay just because of me... or her."He tilted his head slightly. "You really think that's the kind of man I am?"

I hesitated. "No," I admitted. "I just... need to hear it anyway."His thumb brushed lightly along my cheek."I'm here because I want you," he said. "Both of you."

Something in my chest eased. Not completely.But enough. I glanced back toward the group.Patsy was still laughing with Lloyd, grease on her face, completely content. Then I looked back at Walker. A small, mischievous thought crept in.

"Well..." I said slowly.He narrowed his eyes slightly. "What?"I shrugged, trying to look casual."Maybe I should give you somethin' new to tell them."

His eyebrow lifted. "Oh yeah?""Yeah," I said, a hint of a smirk tugging at my lips. "So next time they ask, if you've got better stories...." My fingers traced up his shirt to the back side of his belt buckle. "You better tell em ya do" I bit my lip teasingly. Watching his pretty green eyes. He stepped closer again, voice dropping just a bit. "Careful," he murmured. "You keep talkin' like that, we ain't makin' it back to that barbecue."

I tilted my head. "Maybe I don't want to."

That made him grin. Slow. Dangerous.His hands tightened just slightly at my waist."Blondie..." he muttered.I leaned in just enough to brush my lips near his ear. "Just sayin'...I might become more interesting." I whispered.The wind moved around us again, carrying laughter and smoke and the sound of a life still going on behind us.

But right there—

In his arms—

I didn't feel like I was holding him back...

I felt like maybe—

Just maybe—

He was exactly where he wanted to be.