Chapter 92 - Streamy Awards

A/N Warning: This chapter contains themes of intimacy.

Marshall's POV:

— Day Of The Streamy Awards

Today was Saturday, meaning it was the day of The Streamy Awards for Sadé, and me too since I was her plus one. We had an early start to our day, the both of us still working before even getting ready for the event. We did have breakfast together before going our separate ways though. She went to be a guest on someone's podcast whilst I went to Dre's studio in LA.

I had just entered the studio with my head security guard, Drew, following close behind me. Sitting inside were Dre and Boogie. There was no surprise that Boogie was here because he actually lives in Los Angeles, California, and occasionally works with Dre. He was just in Detroit for a year to finish his album at my studio, but this is where he resides with his family full-time. I enter the room and we all dap each other up, doing handshakes.

"What up, dawg! What you doin' out here in Cali?" Dre asked, sitting back down by the soundboard.

"Going to an award show with my lady. She invited me as her plus one." I explain, taking a seat on the couch, opposite of the two men.

"Oh damn. You must be really into her to be going out in public and shit then." Dre commented.

"Yup. I'm realllllyyyy into her." I say with a smirk on my face.

"This dude loves that girl. Really into her my ass." Boogie piped up, stating the obvious.

"Boogie, shut up. You talk too damn much." I grumble, smacking my lips.

I still don't like admitting it out loud to other people that I'm this deep into a relationship or that I'm in love with a woman per se. It feels strange and uncomfortable for me. Don't get me wrong, I'll throw this shit in a motherfuckers face. But it still flusters me from time to time despite me being a grown-ass man.

"Aye, I'm just saying." Boogie said quietly as he held his hands up defensively, "Anyways, aren't you supposed to be getting ready since you're going to an award show later?"

"Yea, but it's not starting until six this evening. So I still have a lot of time to kill. Plus, she takes forever to get ready. I'm not trying to be bored out of my mind for three hours until she's finished." I answered honestly.

Sadé is a cool girl - Love her style, love how she presents herself. It's classy and put together. However, she does take an extremely long time to get ready. I'm used to it, but I would still rather not wait. I'd rather be productive with my time or watch sports, to be honest. It's just the man in me.

"I know what that's like man. My wife is the same way: Taking her dear sweet time getting herself all dolled up for the day." Dre sympathized with a head shake and chuckle.

"So what are y'all up to today? working on some magic?" I curiously ask.

"Yea, man. We're working on some heat. Might have Snoop hop on it." Boogie said excitedly.

"Let me hear it!" I exclaimed, ready to tune into my favorite craft.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

Dre started playing the beat to an untitled song. It had an R&B vibe to it, but I liked it. Then Boogie started rapping over it, but he only laid down a few bars so far. I liked it. I thought it would be great either on his next album or alone as a single.

I felt a sense of pride knowing that this was my signee & record label artist. Some of his songs from his first album with me are already charting, he's making connections in the industry, and his skills are, of course, getting better. That, and he's working with some huge artists in the game that hold weight already. I knew he'd make it. That's why I signed him.

I ended up staying with them at the studio for a few hours. I gave my opinion on the beat and even helped out Boogie here and there with some of his verses that he wasn't too sure about. Additionally, we all did a lot of chatting as we caught up with one another. It was chill.

— Back At The Hotel

It was almost five hours later and I had just gotten back to the hotel from the studio. There were about two hours left until we needed to get this thing on a roll so I figured that I should start getting ready soon. I didn't need to do much other than change into my clothes considering that I had already showered this morning, and had cut my hair & trimmed my beard a few days ago.

I walked into the room and there was a whole team surrounding Sadé to make sure she looked her absolute best. From hair and makeup to some woman steaming her outfit to her manager. She had the whole nine yards goin'. As I walked more into the room closer to her, she spotted me. A huge smile flashed on her face as she waved at me.

"Hi, love. How was the studio?" She made small talk.

I took a seat across from her in an empty chair. I just watched as the magic happened, answering her question.

"It was good. I met up with Dre and Anthony, and we did a little bit of messing around with some tracks. You know, the usual." I happily recalled.

"I should've known. You're always working even when you're not." She giggled lightly.

"And you don't?" I cheekily shot back.

"Okay, fair. But someone has to be the hustler in this relationship." She sassily joked, pretending to flip her hair that was being slicked into a high ponytail.

I instantly made a funny face, scrunching up my nose as I looked at her, causing her to laugh.

"You know what? You're right: You are the hustler in this relationship, baby." I sarcastically agreed, going along with her joke.

"Mhmm. You know what they call me."

"What do they call you?"

"Big S. Big Sadé. Not the little one." She quickly retorted with confidence.

I instantly start cracking up myself as do some of the other people in the room who acted as if they were minding their business. I know for a fact that nobody is calling her "Big S" or "Big Sadé". Not her soft-spoken, boujee, petite ass.

"Sae, who's calling you that?!" I wonder out loud, amusingly.

"Oh, you don't know?" She raises an eyebrow.

"Nah. Enlighten me."

"Just the whole block." She nonchalantly shrugs.

"Yea, ight. More like in your dreams, sweetheart."

"They're going to be calling me that one day. I promise you."

All I could do was shake my head at her playfulness. We could both be so unserious at times. Just then I heard a knock at the door.

I got up to answer it, seeing some man standing in front of me. What the fuck? Who is this guy and why is he here? I immediately tensed up, putting on a stone-cold expression despite having just been smiling less than thirty seconds ago.

"Uhh, who are you?" I question hostilely.

"Tyler. Sadé told me to meet me in her room at this time." He simply answered.

I bore my blue eyes into his body, silently studying the fuck out of this kid. I don't know why, but a wave of jealousy washed over me. My body tensed up, and I just knew I didn't like this kid. I had no logical reason not to other than I simply didn't. I closed the door in his face, slamming it shut. I heard him let out a scoff from the other side of the door, but I didn't care. I yelled for Sadé, calling her over.

"SADÉ." I yelled loudly, my voice booming through the room.

She didn't respond to me. Instead, she walked over to me with a confused look on her face.

"What's wrong? Why are you calling my name like I'm in trouble or something?" She rolled her eyes.

My left eye twitched as my jealousy began to slowly turn into rage as well. I couldn't help myself. I know she would never cheat on me, but still. At that moment, my brain wasn't thinking logically. I'm a naturally jealous and possessive man. Always have been and always will be. Sadé can't change that in me no matter how healthy our relationship is. Call me toxic. I don't care. I am who I am.

"Why are you looking at me like that? Who was at the door?" She nudged my arm, snapping me out of my daze.

"Who's Tyler?" I aggressively ask.

"My videographer and cameraman. Why?"

"Oh..." I stuff my hands deep into the pockets of my pants out of habit.

"Mar-" She started until she realized how quiet I had become, turning red in the face, which held a guilty look, "No- Did you leave him in the hallway?!" She exclaimed in disbelief.

I quickly averted my gaze to the ceiling not answering her question. I was too ashamed of my actions. She rushed to the door opening it in an annoyed state.

"You didn't see the big ass camera in his hands?" She pointed out as he revealed himself once again.

And sure enough, there was indeed a camera in his hands. Damn.

"My bad, man." I awkwardly apologized, scratching the back of my head.

"It's cool." Tyler gave me a slight nod, seemingly uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry about him. We're all just a little nervous today, I guess." Sae apologized on my behalf while giving me a death glare.

She walked past me to finish her makeup after she closed the door, but I grabbed her arm. It was only us two in the foyer now, seeing as that Tyler dude made his way to where everyone else was in the common area of the suite. She quickly turned around to face me, squinting her eyes. I already knew she was a little pissed off at the stunt I pulled. Especially because this is business for her, and she doesn't play about her professional image or work. She's real strict on that type of stuff.

"What?" She crossed her arms over her chest angrily.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to embarrass you like that." I say as guilt replaces all other feelings in my body like a ton of bricks.

"Marshall, I don't even know why you would think something like that. He's one of the people on my team. He's here to film some scenes for an upcoming vlog that I plan on posting. I wouldn't cheat on you." She said the last sentence in a more hurt tone.

"Bab-"

"No. I don't want to argue with you right now. Please just go get dressed. I'm almost ready anyways." She said gently, pouting out her bottom lip.

She walked away, not allowing me to say anything. Now, I truly did feel like a jerk. Why must I be so damn toxic sometimes? I really gotta get that shit under control if I'm going to be committed to her. Because she clearly isn't the type of woman to play around about shit like that. Not in the slightest.

I watched as she walked away, running my hands over my face. I let out a breath of air before walking to the bedroom to get dressed for the event. I went into the adjourning bathroom to freshen up first before changing my clothes. I changed from my sweats into some black G-Star Raw pants and a plain black T-shirt. I layered a plain black Champion hoodie over it along with my favorite black Saint Laurent letterman jacket. I slipped on a pair of Nike SF Air Force 1 Mid-Mushroom shoes that I had recently bought. I finished it off by adding my gold jewelry pieces.

I looked over myself in the mirror, checking that I looked presentable enough for the award show. I felt good with the outfit I had put together all by myself.

I didn't bother going back out there since Sae was filming for her YouTube, and I didn't want to be in it. I'm sure she told them not to get me in the background even in the slightest because she knows I'm extremely private in that aspect. Instead, I sat back down on the bed, closing my eyes. I let out a sigh thinking about how this now private part of my life - My relationship that I cherish so much - Will no longer be as private since we're going to make it official within less than two hours.

It's not that I'm upset about it because I'm not. I agreed to do this. If I didn't want to, I would've simply told her no. I want to show her off to the world, I want people to know she's mine, and I'm proud of what I have at home. I'm just scared I guess: Nervous. I haven't been seen with a lady by my side since Kim, and even then she was never really seen in public with me. She didn't attend events with me or was in the limelight other than the occasional caught-by-paparazzi-thing or the times when she'd shit on me publicly by doing interviews to tarnish my name. She stayed home, taking care of the kids so I was alone by myself. But now, everything's different.

All eyes are going to be on us. People are going to be giving their unwanted opinions on our relationship, our dynamics, whether we're a good match or not, etc. It made me kind of annoyed yet fearful at the same time. What if people don't like us together? You know they'll start to spread any type of rumors like wildfire to get a reaction out of us. From here on out, anywhere we go, we'll need security. They'll be trying to spot us from miles away, treating us like a tourist attraction. The mental side of things was all a little bit too much for me right now.

I just wanted her all to myself. Like my little secret from the world: My guilty pleasure. Was that greedy and selfish of me? Probably. Did I care though? No.

I suppose I wore myself out with my own overwhelmingness as I slipped into a light slumber, waiting for my lady to finish up whatever it is she was currently doing.

—

I awoke to a light weight on top of my body causing me to let out a faint grunt in response. My eyes fluttered open, seeing Sadé's brown eyes already staring back at me.

"Wake up, old man. We've gotta get going soon." She said, patting me on my chest.

I quickly scanned her body, seeing that she was all dressed up and done to the nines with hair and makeup. She looked stunning.

"You look beautiful." I spoke what was on my mind, complimenting her.

"Thank you. You look very handsome yourself. You dress up well." She returned the compliment with a warm smile.

"Thanks. I can try to look presentable sometimes." I let out a small chuckle, still stretched out on the bed.

"Everyone still out there?"

"No. They left a few minutes ago." She confirmed.

I nodded my head not replying. I sat up from my spot on the bed, licking my lips. I had subconsciously and unintentionally gone quiet. Unbeknownst to myself, I ended up creating a shift in energy in the room. It was tense. Of course, she picked up on the switch right away. She gave me a concerned look, placing her hand on my upper arm.

"What's wrong?" She worried.

"What do you mean?" I questioned, making direct eye contact with her.

"You're quiet. You seem nervous." She read me like an open book.

"I'm not nervous." I lied trying to convince myself more than anything, "I'm just a quiet guy."

"Marshall." She called out my name in a stern yet gentle tone.

"Hmm?"

"What's wrong? Are you nervous about us going out in public together?"

I slowly shook my head yes still not saying anything.

"You know, you don't have to do this. I completely understand if you wanna stay back and stay private. I'm nervous too, ya' know. I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable by doing this." She sympathized.

She soothingly rubbed my arm. I let out a breath of air before speaking.

"It's just that I haven't been seen with a girl in ages; Literally since my baby momma slash ex-wife. Truthfully, I just don't want anyone to judge us. Or you. Or me." I admit anxiously.

"Awh, MarMar. Who cares what they say? Like you always tell me, it's our relationship and not theirs, and that we're private, not secret. Going public doesn't mean that they know everything about our relationship; It just means that everyone knows that we're dating now and that it's all flat on the table. It's okay to be seen with your significant other. You don't have to appear like a lone wolf all the time."

"You're right. I don't have to be alone all the time. Especially not anymore. It's just that I'm so used to it that the change is weird. I'll need a while to adjust to it, but I know I'll be okay. Plus, I get to be the biggest asshole ever and show my lady off." I smirk.

I was thinking of all the ways I'd shove it down people's throats. Thinking about how I can make all these pussies jealous that my lady is hot as hell and they can't even breathe the same air as her. Meanwhile, I'm stuffing my dick so far in her.

"I should've known that was the main motivator behind all this." She joked with a laugh.

"But seriously, Marshall: Are you sure you want to do this? You can always support me from afar. I won't be upset if you don't go." She wanted reassurance.

"Yes, I'm sure. I'm going." I confirm, "Now, go slip your heels on, and let's go."

— At The Streamy Awards

Sadé and I were in the back of a blacked-out Escalade, being driven to the red carpet. We had Drew with us in the front seat, and more security following us in a different Escalade that also held our managers and a few other important people. I knew we were close because I could hear the screams from inside the car.

"You ready to do this?" I looked over at Sae, who held an elated look on her face.

"Yes, I'm so ready." She answered.

Just as she said that the car stopped. I looked out the window seeing people standing behind barricades, paparazzi flashing their cameras, and guests walking the carpet to the main event.

Drew got out of the car and opened our door. I got out first, my ears immediately hearing the piercing sounds of screams when everyone realized it was me. People started calling my name, asking for some sort of attention. I stuck my hand out for Sadé, helping her out of the car. Her hand was in mine for less than a second before everyone truly went crazy. If you thought they were loud for me, you should've heard how loud they were for my lady: The famous Sadé Myers.

I mean, everyone was losing their shit. Screams, calling her name, sticking their hands out, asking for pictures. It was insane. It was like I didn't even exist, like I wasn't even here; I was just some random guy to these people right now. Only in that moment, did I finally understand just how famous and powerful Sadé genuinely is. I never downplayed her success. I always knew she was, but I never knew she was this big.

I let go of her hand, letting her do her thing. I didn't want to hold her back. I stood back, watching in awe as I slowly followed behind her.

Sadé's POV:

— Meanwhile In Sadé's World

I was too excited to step out onto the red carpet. I was excited to see the supporters, see who won, show off my outfit, and show off my man!

By the way, I had wore this gorgeous black Alina Anwar dress that was decked out in sequin fringes, black strappy heels, and a little black Prada bag. I accessorized with gold hoop earrings, my stack bracelets, and a gold necklace with an "S" pendant on it to represent the initial of my first name. For hair, I had it in a straight sleek high ponytail with two fringes hanging in the front. My makeup was glammed up to the Gods with rosey cheeks and red lips. I looked absolutely flawless!

Marshall helped me out the car, allowing me to grab his hand as I hoped down. Once I was finally out and on the red carpet, everyone saw me. They started screaming, yelling my name, asking for photos, etc. This put a huge smile on my face,making me feel happy and grateful for all the love I'm receiving.

I felt Marshall let go of my hand, giving me a light shove on my lower back, insisting me to go ahead and take the spotlight. I did so with no questions asked. My security guards Josh and Leonardo followed on either side of me protectively as Marshall's security and a few other guards I had hired were protecting everyone else. I walked my body towards the sea of people behind barricades, greeting them. I took selfies with fans, made small talk, and signed some autographs. There were a few who asked for pictures and autographs from Marshall or with the both of us, which I was hesitant about. However to my surprise, he didn't mind so we ended up doing a few together and he did some on his own as well.

After about 15 minutes of mingling with the crowd, we finally made our way to the main area of the red carpet where all the influences and celebrities were at, posing in front of cameras and doing interviews. Marshall and I walked together in front of a backdrop to pose for some pictures too. As soon as the photographers saw us together, they went absolutely FERAL! I've never seen anyone this hyped or invested in someone's relationship before. It was a little terrifying, but I managed.

Marshall and I posed for the camera, not being all lovey dovey with one another. Marshall had his usual stoic, poker face, not cracking one bit. I didn't even try to grab his hand or anything, not daring to cross any boundaries. I did put my hand on his shoulder though, which he was fine with, to show that we were togther and not strangers standing next to each other.

We both agreed on no PDA even in the slightest before we both left. We wanted to keep that part of our lives to ourselves. No one needed to see us kiss or hug or hold hands or any of that. It's felt intrusive and awkward. So we wouldn't do it. Not now, not ever.

"Flip the bird!" One of the male fans yelled for us to do.

Marshall heard him, and looked over at me with a suggestive look in his eyes. I gave him an unnoticeable smirk, already knowing that his devious self wanted to do so.

"You heard the man, we should flip the bird. Ya' know, give 'em something to talk about." He said to me.

"Alright." I agreed.

We took a step away from each other, getting into position. Marshall gave his classic middle finger with a hard expression as he had his hood over his hat. I, on the other hand, decided on something a little more goofy and that showed more of my personality. I stuck my tongue out, giving two middle fingers, which was out of character for me to say the least, but it was fun.

We took a few more flicks as a couple until Marshall stood back, giving me my own space to take individual shots. I posed for the camera, doing some with smiles and some that were on the more sexier/serious side.

After that, I went to do a few interviews on the red carpet before the show. I was being interviewed by Emma Chamberlain, who was asking the both of us questions but mainly me.

"Tonight, we have the woman of the hour herself: Sadé Myers! You may know her from YouTube or have seen her for her auh-maze-ing fits, but right now she's here in the flesh."

"Hi!" I waved into the camera.

"Oh, and we also have Eminem." Emma joked in unmoving tone.

"Yea. No one important here, just boring, old, Marshall." He joked back in an evenly flat tone, showing no emotion, not taking what she said seriously or to heart.

"Firstly, I must say: You two make a great couple. I have to get that out the way."

"Thank you." We both said in unison.

"Sadé, I know you took a break from the world of social media, but are you back now? I mean, you are at one of social medias biggest award shows in history right now." Emma pointed out, raising her eyebrows skeptically.

"I did take a break, yes. However, I can happily say that your girl is back on the radar. I am going to be posting my regular YouTube videos, instagram posts, etc. again. There are going to some changes though, but nothing for you to worry about." I answered.

"Was that hard for you?" She pondered.

I took a deep breath in, thinking it over for a moment. I could give a bullshit ass answer that everyone would give or I could be transparent and honest.

"Well, it was hard. I had a very difficult time coming to terms with certain things in my life that happened, that caused the break to happen in the first place. I'm sure it's public knowledge at this point. But I got through it one day at a time. I had a lot of people who were very supportive of me, made sure I was okay, and were simply there when I needed them the most. Taking that time away was most definitely needed. I think if I hadn't, I probably would've had a downward spiral. But you know, it's life: Sometimes we go through not so good, traumatic experiences, and that's just that. I'm happy, I moved on, and I'm ready to work." I replied thoughtfully.

"I can understand your struggle with that. I too have had my fair share of problems with the media, but like you said: Sometimes it's just life, baby. I'm glad to see you thriving now, and I'm sure all your fans can't wait for your return." Emma sympathized before moving on to the next question.

"Moving on to more positive things, I have to ask, Sadé, because I've been dying to know. Where do you get your fashion inspo from? People look to you for inspiration, but where do you look?" She curiously wondered.

"Oh wow. That's a really good question." I smiled, taking a liking to her interview style.

I appreciated how she genuinely seemed interested in who I was as a person, not just as some fashion mogul or girl with a status. I figured that much so because I know exactly who she was myself: A famous YouTuber who is also in the fashion industry. She's only a few years older, but she's been in the game for a while now. I'm actually honored to be interviewed by her.

"I have quite a few people who inspire me. There's the iconic Naomi Campbell, Beverly Johnson - Who was the first black woman on Vogue, and Ann Lowe - The first black fashion designer in America. Growing up though I remember heavily looking up to people like Beyoncé, Paris Hilton, and Rhianna, or just random people in fashion competitions on TV. But there's so many new people out there these days, where I'm like "Wow, they really did that!", like Law Roach for example. I absolutely love his style of work. It's incredible. So I can't really pinpoint one person per se, but it sort of goes into a rotation as I find different interests in certain trends or when I'm going through a phase with my looks."

"Nice. Are you excited for the award show? Do you think you'll take home any wins?"

"I'm very excited! There's a lot of people here tonight that I'm very excited to catch up with and talk to. As far as winning, I'm not sure. I hope I win something." I cheesed giddily.

"Something like casually winning YouTuber of The Year for the third time in a row?" She suggested jokingly.

"Yea, nothing too crazy." I rolled my eyes, faking nonchalant, causing us both to laugh.

"Okay, and what's one person you're excited to see win?" Emma read off the note cards.

"Mr.Keith Lee! I know him and I are competing in the same category: Food, which makes no sense to me because that's not my profession, but I truly do hope he wins. He's gotta take that award home with him tonight!" I exclaimed.

"Interesting to hear. Now, back to you two. This was definitely unexpected considering how opposite you are from each other. How'd you meet?" Emma swiftly switched the focus of the interview from me to my relationship.

Marshall was stood next to me, but allowed me to be a few steps ahead of him. During the interview, he hadn't said much of anything. He was rather calm. However, when Emma asked a question about us, I could feel a shift in his energy that made me a little nervous.

"What was that?" Marshall asked her to repeat the question, standing closer to me than he had been a few seconds ago.

He was quite literally connected to me by the hip at this point if that was even possible. I know he heard exactly what she said, but didn't actually want her to repeat herself. I let him take the lead of the interview for the both of us, allowing him to reveal what he was comfortable with.

"I asked how'd you guys meet. Was it at a concert, run in, by chance?" Emmas clarified, not taking notice of the shift, which I didn't expect her to because she doesn't know us personally.

"Through my daughter." He stated roughly, not expanding on our first interaction.

"How long have you been dating? Who made the first move?"

Define dating, I thought to myself thinking of what Mariah Carey once said. Technically speaking, we've been dating for a good minute, but if you want to get into specifics on since we've been official, almost two months; So not very long at all.

"A while." Marshall answered, "I don't think things like that are really important to tell everyone." He said, not giving any information.

"Understandable. And what do you two have to say to those who have something negative to say about the age gap or your relationship in general? We all know there's going to be people talking about it on twitter later if they aren't already."

This question must've struck a nerve in Marshall because I saw his right eye twitch. Something that only happens when he extremely stressed out, frustrated, or tired. I know he hates when other people are all in his business, especially when it comes down to his private life. He was doing a good job at hiding it though.

"I don't give a fuck what they have to say. She's my lady and that's that. I'm the one hitting it every night after all so... Fuck 'em." He simply said as if what just came out of his mouth was no big deal, causing my checking to heat up.

"And you, Sadé?" She moved the microphone over to me.

"What he said." I agreed, sticking behind what my man said.

Even if it was rather vulgar... That's my man, and Ima stick beside him.

"Do you think you'll ever make a video together? Eminem & Sadé video collab maybe?" The interviewer asked with a lot of hope.

We both looked at each other briefly, a knowing look on both of our faces. I chuckled to myself quietly, knowing it'll never happen.

"Nope." We both answered in unison.

"Darn, I would've died to see you two in a video together. And last question of the night: What's the funnest video you've ever made?" She asked me, ending the interview on a more positive note.

"Ouu, that's a tough one. I've made quite a few goofy videos. I'd probably say the 24 hour stream collab I did a while back with Kai Cenat. That was really fun." I answered truthfully with a smile on my lips.

"And once again, thank you to the both of you for taking the time out of your night to do this interview with me. I had a great time talking to you! Good luck!" Emma concluded.

"Thank You. Have a nice night." I waved at the camera before walking away with Marshall.

— During The Award Ceremony

We were now seated at a round table that had small hor d'oeuvres and glasses of lemon water placed in front of us as we watched the show live. The hosts, co-hosts, and special guests were making their way through the categories, announcing the winners. Everyone was giving their speeches, thanks, and applause. I was really into it, but noticed Marshall didn't care as much as I did. He was engaged of course, clapping here and there, but wasn't paying too much attention because as he put it: "I'm here for you, baby. I'll be more into it when it gets to the ones that you're nominated for."

He was asking me questions on who certain people were, however. Like who Keith Lee was because he was upset that I lost to him in the food category while I was cheering my butt off. I, on the other hand, was happy that I lost to him because he deserved it. I had no clue why I was even placed in that category in the first place.

"And the winner is... Keith Lee!"

I stood up with the rest of the crowd to cheer him on, clapping my hands together proudly. I just love seeing black people win. That, and he's currently one of my favorite people to watch on the internet right now. As soon as he got to the stage, everyone yelled out his iconic catchphrase:

"Fosho you right on!" I cheered with the rest of them.

"Who? What?" Marshall asked me confused with a small frown on his face.

"It's his catchphrase, MarMar. He does food reviews on TikTok." I explained.

"Oh... Why are you happy though? You just lost to him." He went on.

"Yea. I lost to Keith Lee." I looked at him as if he was crazy, "Why would I be mad? I love his content."

"Then in that case, ignore everything I just said." He mumbled, now choosing to clap with everyone else.

"You know I'm not going to be upset if I lose right?" I whispered in his ear as the show continued, taking our seats again.

"I know you won't be, but still. I just want you to win as much as possible. Show all those haters who had shit to say these past few months who's boss. You know what I'm sayin'?" He said sincerely.

"I know what you're saying. Thanks." I said rather quietly.

I thought it was cute how supportive he was of me. Although it was more of a mix of him being supportive and a little over protective. It's just in his nature I suppose.

—

The night went on with me collecting quite a few wins. I had won Fashion & Style, Lifestyle, and Beauty. We were now in the part of the award ceremony that mattered the most. It was the big, important awards that were being announced. Unfortunately, I did lose one of them that I was nominated for, Vlogger of The Year, bringing me to two loses for the night, but that was more than okay with me. Not only did I have more wins than loses, but I also was just happy and grateful for what I had won in general, and that's all that mattered.

Marshall had definitely became more engaged as soon as I started to win and as the awards I was nominated for were announced. He was all types of ecstatic for me, which I greatly appreciated.

There were two awards that I was nominated for that had yet to be announced on who the winner was. These two were the ones I was seriously nervous for. The reason for that was because I was had won YouTuber of The Year two times in a row already so there was a lot of pressure on me to take home the win for the third year consecutively. And I had never won Creator of The Year so if I won tonight, it would be a big deal, boosting my career tremendously. I'm not going to act as if it wasn't a big deal to me because it was. It was a huge deal. I also wanted to win the awards to prove to myself that I did that.

So yes, I was very nervous about the outcome, my anxiety slowly rising. I was fidgeting with my nails as my breathing picked up. It was so bad that I felt like I could break out into sweat any second now. My eyes were focused straight in front of me, not even looking at anything in particular. Of course, Marshall took notice at how quiet I had gotten all of a sudden, ultimately causing him to take in my body language. He placed his large hand over both of my own, ceasing all of my actions. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye, too afraid to look at him fully.

"Sadé. Chill. You look crazy right now. You look like you just popped a perc and are tripping, but trying to seem normal." He teased me.

That immediately caused me to look at him fully, my eyes popping out of my head with how wide they had gotten at his revelation.

"What?!" I said taken aback, causing him to smirk ever so slightly.

"I'm joking. But you do look nervous as hell, Sadé. Just relax." He whispered in my ear.

"That's not funny." I reply huffing out a shaky breath.

"Why are you so nervous all of a sudden?" He wondered.

"Because what if I don't win? These awards are a big deal. They're all a big deal, but these ones are the ones that matter the most. I have a lot of people counting on me and expecting me to win." I vent.

"You're gonna win." He said matter of factly.

"And how do you know that?"

"Because you're you. People love you, and you work hard to get to where you're at. You're gonna win." He repeated himself calmly.

"But- "

"No buts. You're gonna win. Watch." He told me, bringing his attention back to the stage where the hosts reappeared.

I let out another deep breath. "I'm gonna win." I repeated to myself in my head. They started off by announcing YouTuber of The Year.

"Hey, everyone. Welcome back to the show after a short intermission. This next award is for YouTuber of The Year." Tana Mongeau announced.

"Yup, and we have some amazing nominees." Someone named Kris Collins, co-hosted, "Let's take a look at who is up for the nomination." She said, directing everyone to the big megatron TV to watch the names.

Displayed was a short collage of the faces of everyone nominated from one of their popular videos. Once it was over, the lights dimmed and they came back to the center of the stage with an envelope in their hands.

"And the winner is..." Kris opened the card.

"THE THREE TIME WINNER SADÉ MYERS!" Tana called my name.

My jaw dropped on the floor as all the cameras panned over my way to get my reaction up close.

With a stone cold face since the cameras were on him, Marshall clapped his hands together, watching as I stood up. I knew he was happy for me despite how it may seem. I got up from my seat, making my way to the stage. Once I got up there, I was handed the award.

I moved to the podium to give my speech:

"First of all, I just want to say thank you... Again." I giggled, the audience laughing along with me as they clapped.

"Wow, I can't believe you all love me enough to let me win for the third year in a row. I'm so grateful for this award. I love what I do, I love making videos, posting them to YouTube, and making someone's day. To be YouTuber of The Year is a dream come true. I never thought I'd make it. I was just living off of hopes and dreams when I started my career on the platform, making videos for fun, as an escape from reality. I never thought anyone would actually watch them or find me even remotely interesting. I'm just so happy right now. Thank you, I love you all!" I said concluding my speech as I stepped off the stage.

I kept it short and sweet only having thirty seconds to speak. I went back to my seat at the table with a big smile on my face. I felt confident that I would win Creator of The Year now.

There was a few more winners announced before the main award everyone was excited for. The room was buzzing with whispers, rumors, and speculations of the outcome. Uncoincidentally, it was also the last award of the show to be announced. Saving the best for last, I suppose. This time, the YouTuber Link Neal was announcing the award. I was filled with a bundle of jitters and excitement. I decided that even if I didn't win, I'd still be happy; And if I did, then I'd be over the moon with joy.

"Rhett was my best friend. And he will be missed from this bit because he was the one that had always stopped me from saying something stupid... But instead, he's at home. Probably laughing at me as I make a fool of myself..." He joked, "Anways! Enough of my depressing jokes, the time that everyone has been waiting for is finally here. The nominees for one of the most coveted awards of the night are: Alix Earle, AMP, Charli D'Amelio, Jay Shetty, JiDion, Logan Paul, Mikayla Nogueira, Mr.Beast, Sadé Myers, and Zach King." He listed as the corresponding video edits played on the screen behind him.

"And the winner of Creator of The Year is..." He began opening the envelope containing the results.

The room was silent. It was so mute that you could hear a pin drop. Everyone was at the edge of their seats with anticipation, including myself. Link eventually got the envelope open, getting right into it, not wasting any time on announcing who had won.

"Sadé Myers!" He said happily.

If you thought I was happy to win before, that was a lie because I was overwhelmed with euphoria. My hand flew over my mouth as i let out a gasp. I was in so much shock that I felt frozen still in my seat. My heart was pounding out of my chest. I felt a nudge on my arm, bringing me back to reality.

"Oh my God." I whispered to myself as everyone began to cheer for me, standing up to give me a standing ovation.

"Wooo! I'm proud of you." Marshall said as he cheered me on as well, trying his hardest to hide his smile.

I made my way to the stage once again for the last time tonight. I accepted the award, walking to the microphone that had been readjusted to my height. I let out a sigh of relief that I didn't know I was holding in before I started talking.

"Everyone, thank you sooo much! I don't even know what to say because I was not expecting this even in the slightest. I should start off by saying thank you to my supporters for allowing me to get this far in life. I wouldn't be in this position without any one of you. I want to say thank you to my friends, my incredible team that I have standing ten toes behind me in everything I do, my family - I love you Momma!" I started.

"And my man... Thank you to my man." I also thanked Marshall, winking at the camera cheekily as I let out a small laugh.

I couldn't spot him in the huge crowd, but I knew he was red in the face at what I had said. I genuinely appreciate him so much. He helped me get back to where I was during a difficult time when I wanted to quit. He encouraged me, supported me, and was there whenever I needed him as a man should be for his lady.

"Streamy Awards, YouTube, I want to thank y'all too for always giving me my flowers. I could cry right about now." I said tearing up, the happy tears threatening to fall any second, "And to anyone watching who aspires to be where I'm at or who looks up to me: Keep working hard, don't give up no matter how difficult it gets. You will be successful one day, and I'm proud of you! I can't wait to show you all what I have in store for the future. I'm very excited to see where this leads me, and I'm so excited to be back! Okay, bye - I love y'all, ahhh!" I squealed as I watched the timer count down of how long I had left to give my speech.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

I blew a kiss to the camera & crowd before exiting the stage. The audience clapped some more, showing me love. I felt like I was on cloud nine. When I got back to my seat, I indeed was correct. Marshall's face was still as red as a fire hydrant.

"Hi. You look pretty hot there, love." I teased him as I looked at his face.

"Ha ha. I wasn't expecting that. You didn't have to mention me in your speech." He replied quietly.

"I know, but I wanted to because you I really am thankful for you as my man. It was a heat of the moment type of thing."

"You wanna get outta here soon? Seems like everyone's starting to leave now." He mentioned as people started to mingle as they made their way to the exits since the show had ended.

"Sure." I agreed, the both of us getting up to leave.

We started to leave the main hall of the building, stopping to mingle with a few people I knew every once in a while. Our managers and security were close by us, leaving the event as well. I was in the middle of a small conversation with Keith Lee, congratulating him and networking, when someone came up to me. I felt a tap on my shoulder followed by a familiar voice.

"What up, Sadé! Congratulations!"

I turned my head slightly to see Kai standing next to me.

"Hey, Kai. Thank you, and congratulations to you too!" I said, pulling him into a very brief side hug.

He then turned to Marshall who was watching the interaction, introducing himself out of respect.

"I'm Kai Cenat. It's nice to meet you, Eminem, bro." Kai shook his hand excitedly yet managing to keep his composure.

"Nice to meet you, man." Marshall greeted him back politely.

Kai then greeted Keith as well before joining the conversation between all of us. After a while, he brought up an after party that was happening for all the attendees and winners of the award show. It happened every year and was basically one big house party disguised as a networking event. There was typically influencers, celebrities that showed up that wanted to be apart of the scene, and a few up & coming people that were new to the game. Every year it was hosted at Club Riio, a notorious nightclub in Beverly Hills. They'd clear the entire place out just for us, providing all the bottles, appetizers, free VIP sections, and anything else you could think of or possibly want because they knew that all the influencers and big names would be talking and posting about it - A.K.A, free promo.

"So there's an after party at Club Riio tonight. Are you guys pulling up?" Kai wanted to know, the both of us having already been invited by the club owners a few days prior.

"I don't think we will. Not this year." I answered for the both of us.

I was exhausted, and I knew that Marshall wasn't into the party scene. I wasn't neither in all honesty considering my (social) anxiety issues combined with the fact that I'm an all around reserved and shy girl. However, I was more likely to go out to a party than he was. I am in my early 20s after all. But right now, I just wanted to go back to the hotel, order room service, have a nice hot shower, and chill. It seemed like Jordyn had other plans for me as her client though considering she overheard the invitation, answering for me.

"She'll be there." Jordyn insisted.

I snapped my head around, looking at her with an annoyed expression. I gave her pleading eyes, silently begging her to not force me to have to be around all of those people. Unfortunately, she didn't care. She talked it up to using it as a networking opportunity, which is true because many of my collaborations have come from meeting people at these events and after parties, but I just wanted to rest.

"It'll be a great networking opportunity, Sae." She told me, nudging my arm.

"Fine." I said back, letting out a sigh before turning back to Kai and saying, "We'll be there. I'll see you later tonight."

With that we all parted ways, leaving the venue. We made it to the carpool where a black Escalade was waiting for us in the distance.

"Sorry for having to drag you with me to the after party. I know it's not your thing." I apologized to Marshall as we continued to walk.

"It's fine. I wouldn't want you to go alone." She shrugged it off.

"Thanks, but I do want to get out of this outfit and change into something more comfortable and appropriate for the club. It's not really a red carpet event." I mentioned, suggesting we make a stop at the hotel quickly.

"Ight. Wait in the car for me real quick. I just need to talk to Paul about something." Marshall said as I slid into the back seat.

I obliged, obviously not thinking anything of it as the door was shut. I scrolled on my phone, looking at what the blogs were saying about the night. I was still on a natural high, feeling the effects on my body. It wasn't even two minutes later when Marshall came back to the car. My window was already rolled down so I saw him when he strolled up. I was about to open the car door for him when he stuck his hand out, signaling for me to wait. That was when I noticed his other hand was hidden behind his back. I gave him a suspicious look, eyeing him. Because there were no cameras where we were currently at, he held a grin on his face. Then out of nowhere, he pulled out a freshly picked bouquet of pretty pink roses. I immediately gasped, an even bigger smile spreading across my face.

"No way, where'd you get these from?!" I exclaimed, not expecting the sweet gesture.

He handed them to me, allowing me to see how pretty they were up close.

"I saw a woman selling them on the side of the road. Pretty flowers for a pretty girl." He gave me a wink, causing me to blush at his little catchphrase that he now says every time he buys me flowers.

"Thank you, love." I sad softly.

As I smelled the floral scent, I saw a flash before I heard the flick of a camera from a phone. I looked up from the roses over at Marshall, who had his phone out, snapping a picture of me. He then got into the backseat with me, me giving him a peck on the lips as the car began to move. I noticed that he had sent the picture to me so I saved it to my phone.

"Are you going to post it?" He randomly asked me.

"I wasn't planning on doing it... Unless you want me to."

"I think you should." He hummed suggestively.

"Mhmm, okay. I'll post it. But you know, for someone who insists I posts pictures of us, I haven't seen one on your page yet, Sir." I playfully point out.

"Who said I hadn't already?" He cocked his head to the side studying my facial expression.

I knitted my brows together. I looked at him dumbfounded, the realization not hitting me yet.

"I posted a picture of the two of us on the way to the event. You know I'm a shit starter." He clarified, causing my eyes to nearly pop out of my head.

"HUH?" I asked surprised, causing him to let out an evil laugh.

I wasn't actually expecting him to post anything of us. Like, ever due to how much of a private person he is. I quickly took out my phone, pulling up his instagram. Sure enough, there was a no face, no case photo of our bottom halves that he had snuck and posted a few hours ago for the entire world to see. Of course, I liked the picture, reading a few of the comments.

"You're crazy." I mumbled more to myself than anyone.

"You love it though." I heard him say back to me.

I shook my head lightly, going to my camera roll, typing out a caption for my own picture to post to instagram.

— At Club Riio After Party

I had changed my outfit back at the hotel, and Marshall and I had just arrived at the club. He was in his same outfit from earlier because while it was more dressed up than what he'd normally wear, it was still appropriate for the club. Especially considering the fact that almost everyone else was still going to be at least a little bit dressed up, trying to look as good as possible. I had decided to wear the pants that I had custom made, and a white shirt that had crystals on it t match the crystals that was embedded in the jeans. I paired it with a pair of clear open-toed heels. I ditched my purse, putting a tube of lipgloss and my phone in my pocket.

As soon as we arrived, there was paparazzi out front - Waiting to get a picture of anyone with a name. I saw Marshall pull his hat down lower over his head and pull his hood up before he got out of the truck. He held his hand out, helping me out of the vehicle. Josh escorted us inside the building as paparazzi caught a few pictures of us.

As soon as we enter, the music is blaring and there's bodies everywhere. Marshall immediately grabs my hand in a protective manner as we make our way to the VIP section where a few of my friends slash people I'm acquainted with are. There's Kai and the rest of AMP, Ice Spice, Mariah The Scientist, Sza, Trisha Paytas, and a few other friends of mine. There were a lot of big names at the party; And since it was exclusive - Not open to the public at all - Everyone basically knew each other. We all exchanged greetings and hugs before getting comfortable in the section.

There were a few artists set to perform on the stage. Ice Spice had apparently already did her set while we were on the way here so I was a little bummed about that since I love her music. And I'm not just saying that because we're close. Currently, Jack Harlow was on the stage rapping and would be DJ'ing for a while afterwards.

A bottle girl had come over to take orders for drinks a while ago and I had ordered a few. I was sipping on some champagne while sat on Marshall's lap. We were conversing with the others, listening to the music. That's when Jack started performing his newest single Lovin' On Me. I've been obsessed with the song ever since it came out. I wasn't drunk, but tipsy rather so of course I wanted to dance along to it. I subconsciously started grinding my hips against his lap as I swayed back and forth singing the lyrics to the song with Isis.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

"I'm vanilla, babyI'll choke you, but I ain't no killa, babyShe 28 tellin' me I'm still a babyI get love in Detroit like Skilla babyAnd the thing about ya' boy is- "

I felt his hands grab ahold of my hips, but not holding me in place. Then I heard his voice in my ear start to sing the chorus.

"I don't like no whips and chains, and you can't tie me down. But you can whip your lovin' on me, baby. Whip your lovin' on me." He whispered in my ear, giving it a kiss right below the earlobe.

"I like that dudes lyrics. He's a nice rapper." He complimented, watching him on the stage.

He had been doing that the whole time. Analyzing his stage presence and really paying attention to every single one of his lyrics. If I didn't know any better, I'd think he was a talent recruiter trying to scout him out.

"His name is Jack Harlow. You like his music?" I questioned already knowing I'd have to introduce them to one another.

"I do, actually. Do you know him personally?"

"Yea. We met a few years ago at Fashion Week." I answered honestly.

"Do you think you can send him my way? I think I want him on one of my tracks for the album." He wondered excitedly.

"I got you." I said, getting up from his lap.

I walked over to the back of the stage where Jack was, right in time as he had finished up his last song. His security let me through, already knowing who I was. I waved him over as he looked in my direction, spotting me. He was with his photographer and best friend Urban, and his other best friend Druski, whom I knew as well.

"What's up, Sadé." He embraced me in a side hug.

"Hey, Jack." I hugged him back before pulling away.

"Hi, Dru. Hi, Urban." I waved at the other two men who waved back with smiles on their faces.

"What are you doing back here?" Jack asked curiously as we made small talk.

"I was actually wondering if you wanted to come over to my section for the night. Marshall liked your music, and thinks you're pretty cool." I told him nonchalantly.

His face went pale, drained from all color as his eyes widened. He looked like a deer caught in headlights.

"EMINEM'S HERE? HE WAS WATCHING THAT?" He screamed.

"Yes." I chuckled lightly at how easily starstruck everyone is over Marshall.

I suppose that's what happens when you become the greatest rapper alive and are as famous as he is.

"He wanted me to introduce you two."

"Oh my God. This doesn't feel real. He's like my idol. Do I look good? Do I stink? Am I all sweaty?" He fired off questions left and right.

He was pacing back and forth like a chicken with his head cut off, making a few of us laugh at his nerves.

"You look fine, and no, you don't stink." I confirmed in an amused tone.

"Shit, well let's not keep the king waiting. Let's go!" He said pumped up.

I walked back over to the section with him and his friends following closely behind me. Once we made it to the section, Marshall stood up, shaking his hand as he introduced himself.

"Marshall, this is Jack Harlow. Jack, this is Marshall Mathers. Have fun talking about rap." I cheekily said as I left the two of them alone.

Knowing Marshall, he was definitely going to be talking about business and music with him all night long. In the meantime, I decided to mingle with a few of the ladies. Sza was now on the stage performing Kill Bill, also a song I've been obsessed with recently.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

We all went to the dance floor, drinks in hand as we watched her live. We danced around, screaming the lyrics as if we had wrote them ourselves, fake relating to them.

"I'm so mature, I'm so matureI'm so mature, I got me a therapist to tell me there's other menI don't want none, I just want youIf I can't have you, no one shouldI mightI might kill my ex, not the best idea!"

My tipsy-ness from the liquor made me just a little bit too rowdy. I had started to literally scream the "I might kill my ex" part in particular a lot more loudly than all the other parts... Oops. Didn't mean to say my intrusive thoughts out loud.

—

I had been dancing with the girls for the last hour, having a good time. I wasn't drinking anything aside from the two glasses of champagne I had from earlier so my tipsy-ness had worn off completely. The only downside was that I was in dire need of having to pee now due to the alcohol. So I made my way to the ladies bathroom.

I did my do, washing my hands afterwards. I left the bathroom, going back to my group when someone accidentally bumped into me. The lights in the club were dimmed, almost completely dark with the exception of strobe lights so I couldn't immediately make out who it was.

"Sorry, my baby bump has been getting in the way of everything lately." The woman apologized.

Upon realizing she was pregnant, I immediately said sorry instead for having not paid enough attention to my surroundings.

"Oh, no! No need to apologize, I should've been more cautious. I'm so sorry." I say sincerely, "Are you alright?" I ask worriedly.

"I'm fine, Sadé. Thanks." The woman replies, saying my name.

I scrunch my face up in discomfort. I do not know this woman nor do I recognize her from anywhere. And considering this is an exclusive, invite-only party, I should know her if she knows me because I know damn well that there's no fans up in here. She catches drift of my confusion, telling me her name.

"Jayda. I know it's a bit hard to tell who people are from the lights." Jayda says.

Oh. Jayda. As in Jayda Wayda. Jayda Cheaves. Jayda, the woman my ex cheated on me with while we were doing a business venture together Jayda.

"Hi." Is all I say in this awkward situation.

I hadn't spoken to her nor seen her since everything went down. Yet here she is in front of me. Heavily pregnant at a night club, trying to apologize to me for more than bumping into me: For being a home wrecker, although the home was more than wrecked enough. It was fucking destroyed.

"Look, I'm sorry for everything that went down between us, girl. I should've never done that. It was wrong of me, and I'm a changed woman now. I'm in a relationship, I'm a mother, and I just hope there's no bad blood between us." She pleaded with me.

Honestly, I really don't care. I don't care about what she has to say. I don't care about her life. I simply don't care. It's not my business anymore. What happened, happened. I'm in a much happier place in my life. I'm doing better than ever, and that's all I care about.

"I'm over it." I confirm to not having in any bad blood and letting it go.

"Congratulations though." I say, looking at her pregnant belly, surprised at her pregnancy.

"How far along are you?" I politely ask in hopes of making the conversation less uncomfortable.

"I'm 8 months along." She cheerfully shared with me.

I was smiling right along with her until the realization hit me. That's when I instantly I got quiet. I had subconsciously started doing the math calculations in my head of when eight months ago was: April.

April was when I was still dating my ex, Zach. I didn't leave him until May because May is when I found out about the affair between Zach and Jayda. Which means I was lied to about how long the affair lasted too, but what did I expect? I shouldn't have excepted anything more from those two. But gosh, having the realization of it hit me in real time sucks like hell.

Questions started running through my mind like wild fire. Did she know she was pregnant that whole time? Were either of them ever going to tell me had I stayed in that relationship with him? Did he ever get any other women pregnant and just have them abort the child just so that I didn't find out? Were they already dating at that point instead of solely having sexual relations?! I was thrown for a loop, and I was so confused.

Jayda felt the tension between us and decided that now of times would be the perfect one for her to throw even more shit in my face. How kind of her. Almost as if her dumbass couldn't read the fucking room.

"I found out I was pregnant in late April. Turns out we're having a baby boy next month!" She gushed, rubbing her round belly in enthusiasm.

...

"Oh, that's great. Are you two like... Ya' know..." I waved my hands around frantically not exactly finding the right words of how to ask if they were dating or not.

"Yea, we are. We've been together for a while now. He's not here with me tonight though. He got into this really bad accident a few weeks ago from a robbery gone wrong and has been hurt ever since, going back and forth to hospital visits... But I'm sorry you had to find out this way." She confirms, finally using her brain cells to assess the energy.

About fucking time. I still remained silent. I plastered a condescending smile on my face to mask any and all emotion I had.

"I know that what happened was so incredibly wrong and disgusting of me. I really do regret ever doing that to you. It just happened, and I did't know how to tell you, and- "

Having sex with my then boyfriend just kind of happened? It was just a little oopsie? A little accident? He just kind of accidentally put his dick in you, orgasmed until he came, got you pregnant, and decided to keep the baby and play house? That just happened? Right, I totally understand, girl. Of course, I didn't say any of that aloud though. I stayed quiet, looking at her with utter stupidity and disgust. I came back to reality and she was still apologizing profusely.

" -I shouldn't have burned our bridge. Our business venture would've been huge, I know it. Hopefully one day we can be as good of friends as we once were. And maybe we can even pick up where we left off on that business vent- " She started, but I stopped her right there.

"No." I flat out say, ignoring her apology, not accepting it one bit and declining anything to do with her.

"Listen, girl. Congratulations on the baby boy. I hope he's born healthy. And I truly hope life goes well for you and Zach, and I hope you two have a beautiful relationship. I wish all three of you nothing, but the best." I tell her with all sincerity, "I gotta go." I  bid her goodbye and farewell as I swiftly walk away from the entire situation.

I cannot believe that just happened to me. I go back to the section, sitting next to Marshall who's still conversing with Jack. I sit completely quiet, my hands clasped in my lap. My anxiety was taking over me and I felt like I could cry right about now. Not because I'm hurt by the situation because I moved on from that - From everything surrounding that part of my life. But I felt like I could cry because I was so embarrassed. Embarrassed that I found out this way, and I felt like someone basically got one up on me.

I feel like the pregnancy was the final slap in the face for me though. I obviously can't have kids; I can't get pregnant and never will be able to. At one point in my life, I did want kids one day, but I don't anymore due to the fact that I don't want to yurn for something that I know isn't a realistic possibility for me in life. Zach knew that. I was very transparent with him about it. When I was dating him, he always spoke about how he always wanted kids in the future when we'd get married. I obviously would've never been able to give that to him, however. Thank God because I would not have wanted to be tied down to him. Anyway, he'd use that as an excuse to further explain to me why I was so worthless, lesser of a woman, and ultimately abuse me for it.

Now, I know that not true by a long shot. I know that children or being able to reproduce doesn't make me lesser of a woman than the next. It doesn't make me worthless by any means. It's just the fact that I was put in an awkward and uncomfortable position just then that got to me. It made me feel icky and had majorly dampened my mood.

—

I sat quietly on my phone for the last thirty minutes, not talking to anyone. I wasn't drinking, I was socializing, just sat there in my own thoughts. Unbeknownst to me, Marshall was been watching me periodically the entire time he was talking to Jack. I guess he had gotten concerned enough to ask me what was wrong because he draped his arm over my shoulder pulling me into his side so I could hear him over the music.

"You ight?" He asked me worriedly.

"I'm fine." I lie to him, not wanting to ruin the good mood he was in.

He turned his entire body towards me, looking me dead in my eyes. I quickly avert my gaze from him, knowing that he knew that I was lying. The look on his face alone said it all. He had given me the "I know you're fucking lying" face.

"Why are you even trying to lie to me like I don't know you?" He said seriously, "You don't always have to professional and be fine." He commented.

Before I could even say anything or stop him he had told the guys that we were leaving. I tried to stop him, but it was no use. All of my protests went in one ear and out the other.

"Marshall, we don't have to leave." I try to convince him.

No response.

"MarMar."

No response.

"Yo, we're gonna head out now. It's getting kinda late. I'll hit you up about that feature soon, Jack." He said dapping the guys up, who all waved me goodbye.

He grabbed my hand expeditiously, walking us through the sea of bodies. With his other hand, he dialed for security with his phone, making sure that they were waiting for us out back.

Once we got outside, flashes were going off left and right: More paparazzi. I didn't even care if they had gotten my picture or not at this point. Marshall did though, considering his grip on my hand tightened as he lead me to the car along with security.

We got inside the car, strapping ourselves in the backseat as we ride back to the hotel. The ride there was long and silent. It was borderline uncomfortable, mostly for me.

— Later, At The Hotel

The time was now 12:21 at midnight. As soon as we make it into the suite, I feel a lot better. I felt way more comfortable and at ease. I was secretly grateful that Marshall had dragged me out of that club because I hadn't realized how low my social battery had gotten until I began to take my heels off.

I walk into the bedroom, Marshall following close behind me. I continue to say nothing, not wanting to bring up what happened as i start to undress from my clothes into a silk robe. He continues to watch me until he just blurts it out.

"You gonna tell me what's up or nah? You seemed pretty shaken up back there."

I stop my movements before I turn to face him. I let out a small sigh before I'm honest about what happened with my run in with Jayda. I tell him everything. From how she's pregnant, to how her and Zach are apparently dating now. I also told him how he wasn't there though because of a robber gone wrong, which weirdly made him laugh at his misfortune. I, on the other hand, simply didn't give a fuck. Once I finish telling him the story of what happened at the club, he shrugs his shoulders dismissively. The expression he gives me is one of misunderstanding. He had no clue why it was such a big deal for me.

"Okay... So why are you so upset?" He looked at me dumbfounded as he started to take his jewelry off and undress himself.

"Because." I say quietly.

"Because what? Because you're hurt by him? Because I know damn well it's not because you still love his ass." He grumbled the last part.

I scrunch my face up in disgust and annoyance. I cannot believe he just said that.

"No! I am not still in love with him nor do I have love him. I - Why would you even say that? I love you." I raise my voice ever so slightly.

"Then is it because you can't have kids... You know since she's like pregnant and all?..." He carefully asks me with hesitation.

"No." I huff out again.

"Then what is it? Just say fuck 'em and keep it moving." He sighs, walking over to hold me in his arms.

"It was just so weird for me. I felt so embarrassed that's all. Like why say sorry, expect me to forgive you and be happy for you, knowing all the wrong doings you did to me? I feel like it's fake and like she just wanted to get one up on me. I didn't like that." I expressed my feelings of dislike.

He silently nods his head, finally understanding why I was feeling the way I did.

"Mhmm. I can relate to how you feel. Someone had a baby on me too, you know." He opened up.

"Really?" I said a surprised tone as I look up at him.

"Yup. How do you think I ended up with Stevie so many years later? Kim cheated on me with another dude and ended up pregnant." He recalled somberly.

"I'm sorry that happened to you." I sympathize with him, understanding how he must've felt.

"I say that to say that I know how you feel right now since you explained it to me. While it may not be the same situation since I stayed and raised her because I loved Kim back then, and you have no feelings for Zach whatsoever nor do you feel any type of way for her pregnancy, I can see how you may feel uncomfortable or embarrassed about it. Knowing that it happened out of spite and ill intentions. And finding out the way you did, that can be embarrassing. Everyone in that situation knows but you and it like a slap to the face." He said in understanding.

"That's exactly how I felt. Everyone else knew but me and I felt stupid about it."

"Honestly, baby, just let it go. Don't let it beat you up. They're paying the consequences not you. People can be real miserable sometimes and misery loves company so good on them for finding each other. You keep finding happiness and moving forward though. Don't let them see you sweat." He advised.

"I won't. I told them to have a good life together. I'm happy where I'm at."

"Good. Now you sure you're ight this time?" He double checks.

"Yes. It was just a bad environment and situation. Thank you for getting me out of there though. I love you."

"I love you too." He gives me a small kiss on the lips.

"Let's take a shower. I feel all sticky from tonight." I insist.

He agrees, going into the bathroom with me. We both hop in the shower, washing off our bodies together in relaxation. Marshall got out before me, leaving me alone to relax more and do my skincare routine.

—

I exited the shower half an hour later, already lathered lotion on my body. I changed into a silk nightgown, having nothing underneath so I could just let my body breathe for the night. I wrapped my hair up in a messy bun, knowing it's just be done again tomorrow. I head Marshall order room service earlier, and now I heard music starting to play from the speakers that was connected to the TV in the living room of the suite. I recognized it as my playlist. I looked at the time seeing it was nearly 1:30 in the morning. What is this man doing, I think to myself in amusement.

I walk out to find Marshall stood in front in the living room, struggling to open a bottle of champagne. I walk over to him, snatching the bottle from him as I shake my head.

"What are you doing trying to open a bottle of champagne? You know damn well you don't know how to open one Mr.Sober." I tease him.

"I'm trying to keep the party going, Ms.Creator of The Year. Thought we'd celebrate your wins from tonight alone - Just the two of us." He says with a grin on his face.

"Okayyy." I hum, popping the champagne bottle without any effort as it start to spill over.

I walk over to the room service cart that has two glasses on it, appetizers, and a few desserts. I pour the champagne in one of the glasses for myself, then grab the Red Bull that's on the cart, poring it in a glass for Marshall. I hand him his glass while I grab mines.

"To success." I say as I cheers him, sipping the decedent alcohol.

"To success. Speaking of success, I have a little something for you. Close your eyes." He instructs me.

I do as I'm told, not questioning him. I hear his foot steps go into the room before I hear them come back closer to me. I hear him stop in front of me, taking my hands as he leads me to the couch. He sets me down, telling me to open my eyes back up.

I open them to see him holding a small black box with the name of jewelers on it. He hands it to me with a hopeful look in his eyes. I open the box, scared to see what he had gotten me. The last time he had bought me jewelry was in my birthday, and we weren't even official yet, but he still spent thousands on me. So I couldn't even imagine what he had spent now that we were officially boyfriend and girlfriend. When my eyes focus on the object, I see that it's a pair of gold, diamond encrusted, heart earrings. I suck in a breath at the sight. They were beautiful - Absolutely gorgeous.

"MarMar, these are so beautiful." I gush out, "Thank you!" I say hugging him tightly.

"Congratulations, pretty girl. I knew you'd win. I know it's not much, but I'll take you out to dinner to properly celebrate when we get back to Detroit." He told me sweetly.

"What, no. You don't have to do that. This gift is more than enough, and I'm more than happy. I promise." I decline his offer to do anything more than he already has for me.

"I want to. I insist."

"Alright. Thank you again. I love them. I can't wait to wear these!" I exclaim.

I admire the earrings some more before closing the box up. I didn't put them on because I'd be going to bed soon and didn't want to loose them. So I decided to wait until we got back home to show them off.

"Come on, let's dance." I say getting up from the couch, pulling Marshall up with me.

I was feeling the music and wanted to dance. Since he instead that we celebrate alone, why not do just that. Dua Lipa's Dance The Night started playing. I swayed my hips, the glass back in my hands. I was back in my good mood, my natural high from the night back in full effect. Marshall stood watching me with curious eyes, not dancing yet.

It wasn't until her song Levitating featuring Da Baby came on that he started to get more loose.

"I need you, all night. Come on dance with me, I'm levitating." I sang the lyrics back to him.

That's when he started moving his body to the beat dancing as well as he let out a nervous chuckle. It was hard bringing him out of his shell to have fun sometimes, but I never did mind. I know that he can be reserved and shy at times much like myself.

Drake, Swizz Beatz & T.I's Fancy played next. I let out squeal, knowing that this was my song. I'm not into rap or hip hop nearly as much Marshall, but I had my favorites, regardless. This was one of them.

"Ahhh, I love this song!"

"Me too. Bet you can't dance better than me." He challenged me to a dance off.

"Is that a threat?" I crossed my arms not being one to turn down a challenge.

"It's whatever you want it to be, pretty girl." He pressed me.

"Oh, it's so on." I yelled.

Right then and there we started having a dance battle in the middle of the hotel living room. If you would've walked in, you probably thought we were both having a medical episode with how we were moving. But no, we were having the night of our lives, having so much fun. We had no care in the world right now. We were just happy with each other and with how the night had gone. We were laughing, singing, and dancing.

Songs continued to play into the early hours of the morning:

Dance The Night | Dua LipaLevitating | Dua Lipa, Da BabyFancy | Drake, T.I, Swizz BeatzTwerk | City Girls, Cardi B.Bitch Better Have My Money | RihannaDrunk In Love | Beyoncé, Jay-ZAge Ain't Nothing But A Number | Aaliyah Rock The Boat | Aaliyah

We had stopped our dance battle a while ago, decided that we were both terrible so it was a tie. That didn't stop us from still having a good time though because the sensual songs of my playlist had started playing, causing Marshall to come up behind me and move his hips in sync with mines. Drunk In Love by Beyoncé and Jay-Z had just came one and we were both feeling it.

He had his hands firmly on my waist while I grinded against his crotch. I was starting to become aroused by every second that passed in the song. I felt his presence increase in his grey sweatpants, his hard member becoming very noticeable. He was definitely enjoying this way more than he should have. I sang the lyrics to him, relating to it in every, which, way. He dipped his head down into my neck, kissing it sloppily. I heard him very lowly rap Jay-Z's part, his voice turning me on even more.

"Talkin' 'bout you the baddest bitch thus farTalkin' 'bout you be reppin' that ThirdI wanna see all the shit that I heardKnow I sling Clint EastwoodHope you can handle this curve, uhForeplay in a foyer, fucked up my WarholSlid the panties right to the sideAin't got the time to take drawers off, on sightCatch a charge, I mightBeat the box up like Mike in '97, I biteI'm Ike Turner, turn up, baby, no, I don't play"Now eat the cake, Anna Mae"Said, "Eat the cake, Anna Mae," I'm niceFor y'all to reach these heightsYou gon' need G3, 4, 5, 6 flights, sleep tightWe sex again in the mornin'Your breasteses is my breakfast, we goin' in."

I bent over slightly to give my ass a little shake when he slapped it harshly, rubbing the pain away. I turned around to face him, grabbing him by the jaw as I bring his face to Mike's. I kissed him on the lips merrily as we tied tongues. I moved my hands to his lower half, palming him through his sweats.

"Just say the words and we can do this all night." He said, licking his lips as he looked down at me.

"Can't keep my eyes off my fatty. Daddy, I want you." I said the lyrics as I winked at him flirtatiously.

He took the hint with a grin on his face as he grabbed me by the thighs. I let out a squeal of excitement as he laid me on the bed. He wasted no time in taking both of clothes off. He climbed on top of me, kissing me passionately as he slipped two fingers inside of me to feel my wetness. I let out a moan at the feeling. He pumped himself a few times before exchanging his fingers for his dick.

He let out a low groan at the feeling, pausing his movements before he picked up again. He found a rhythm to the Aaliyah songs that were playing in the background: Age Aint Nothing But A Nunber and Rock The Boat. How ironic, I thought. His thrusts weren't fast nor was it slow: It was right in the middle ground - Perfection.

My eyes rolled to the back of my head, the euphoria of everything I was feeling combining into a pleasurable feeling that was quickly becoming too much to handle. Moans were slipping from my lips like water and I couldn't control it. Everything just felt so good. As if it couldn't possibly get any better, Marshall threw one of my legs over his shoulder, going even deeper than before but keeping that same pace. His hand was digging into my thigh as he kissed my foot sweetly before dipping his head down to suck my nipple.

My hands went to his back. I felt like I needed to hold on to something, anything. As soon as he hit that spot though, I moaned prettily on his ear, taking my nails down his back. In response, he got my g spot over and over again, sending me over the edge.

"Mhmm, I'm gonna cum." I let out.

"Don't be shy. Let it out. Cream all over me." He encouraged me.

A few more thrusts later and I was letting out around him. My womanhood was pulsating around him as my juices flowed out from beneath me. He didn't stop his thrusts not once though. He kept going, having no plans of stoping anytime soon.

I was quickly becoming overwhelmed with the feeling. I was overstimulated, but loved the feeling. I was practically begging for more, my voice hoarse. In an attempt to regain some type of control back and demanded that I ride him.

"Baby, baby. Let me ride you." I pleaded with him.

Of course he didn't say no. He loves whenever I'm on top. He lives for it. He's ravished by it. He stopped his movements, slipping out of me as he flipped us over so that I was on top now.

I grabbed his member, sinking down on him slowly. I paced my breathing, ready to go to pound town. He but his lip as he looked at me. His hands were roaming all over my body; Squeezing and grabbing everywhere. I started off slow also finding a rhythm much like he did. I soon sped up my movements, but not too much. My hands were on his chest for support. We locked eyes with each other and I knew he wasn't going to last as long as he thought he would. He knew as well as I did, that as soon as I got in top it was over with.

I decided to prolong his happy ending, however, edging him on. It was driving him wild. Everytime I felt him become close or about to bust, I stopped all movements to kiss him. He eventually caught on to my antics, him now being the one to beg for more.

"Please." He panted out, "Keep going."

"Mhmm. I like when you beg for it sometimes." I said to him rather innocently yet the smile on my face was devilish.

"I bet you fucking do." He grunted as I felt him twitch inside me once again as I started my movements back up.

"So damn sexy." He said to himself in awe as we watched me go.

I bounced and grinded my hips in a way that I knew he couldn't resist. His hands groped my boobs before moving to my cheeks. He gripped both of them hard before delivering a harsh smack, causing me to let out a yelp. That was definitely going to leave a mark.

He rubbed the pain away just as he dug his fingers in my hips as he came inside of me. He shit his load deep as he bucked his hips up, holding mines down. He let out one of the loudest moans I had ever heard from him yet as I helped him ride out his high.

"Ohhh, FUCK!" He yelled out. his face and neck turning red as his icy blue eyes rolled back.

I ultimately came again for the second time that night just from the sight of him alone. He was too fine.

We laid there in silence for a few minutes, catching our breaths. We eventually got ourselves cleaned up, turned the music off and passed out from exhaustion on the bed together. What a night.